Disclaimer: everything belongs to their rightful owner

im so tempted to rewrite the previous chapters bc oh my god im cringing

Satsuki was troubled.

Perhaps troubled was an understatement, but she was troubled.

Seijuro had just left her room after informing her of Tetsuna's participation in their scheduled circus. The new information left her in a very troubled state as it meant that Tetsuna would be following them to the town of Aodane. She wouldn't be remaining in her small room in the mansion like planned initially. This meant the plan that she had devised with Daiki when she ran into him in Loreine was foiled, even though it hadn't been carried out.

That time frame was the only possible moment for Daiki to retrieve Tetsuna. The first-string members – plus the two second-string members – and Tsujirou would be gone thus leaving only the second and third-string members around the mansion. The second-string members would be left to guard the mansion so if Tetsuna were to vanish upon their return, the second-string members would be the ones blamed. Truthfully, Satsuki didn't care about the others. If it meant the first-string members were out of harm, she was fine with that.

She paced around her room, trying to think of a solution for the newly arisen problem and how to convey the solution – if she managed to figure out one – to Daiki before they leave. She remembered him saying that he would be camping out in the nearby woods. Perhaps she could go and search for him there.

Either way, she had to speak to him. Fast.

Daiki sneezed for the umpteenth time that night as he shivered under the blanket he curled up in. The blanket, as well as the tent he was in, was provided kindly by Satsuki after she thought of a plan to help him get Tetsuna away from Tsujirou. She had told him to wait until she and the rest of the circus members had left the mansion for their next performance. He would sneak in and snatch Tetsuna away at that time. That was the plan. And he was waiting for the moment he could see carriages hurry away from the large mansion that was clear in sight from the spot he had set camp.

He spent the passing days surviving on whatever vegetation or animal he could get his hands on and he had to admit, he was enjoying the wildlife experience. It felt more fulfilling and richer than any life he could have in Rione. The air was fresh, and void of any scent of death or poverty and the sun would light up the area until it seemed like there was an event going on.

He enjoyed being out of Rione. And he wished Tetsuna was with him to experience the joy he felt.

It felt odd not having her by his side, something he had noted ever since she was taken away. Since childhood, they had experienced everything together. Every birthday, every winter, every happiness. She was a sister to him and they were the closest of friends since the first day they met. So how strange it felt when he was out here, having the time of his life and she wasn't with him. It felt incomplete, and he hoped to have her back at his side, to complete him once again.

A rustle in the trees snapped Daiki out from his musings and his hand instinctively reached out for the knife he had brought along with him, steadying into a defensive stance to protect himself from whatever it was coming his way. He peeked through the small opening in the tent, his body tensing as he could hear the creature coming closer, and closer, and closer.

He could feel the adrenaline coursing through his veins as his heart pumped rapidly in his chest and sweat trickled down his forehead. He wasn't afraid, but he wasn't going to let his guard down.

There was a snap of a twig that sounded too close for comfort, and his breath hitched, the blade of the knife held in front of him as he prepared to pounce.

"Daiki-kun?"

The hushed calling of his name instantly released the tension from his muscles and he tossed his knife aside. Daiki sprung out of his tent to greet his visitor, the line his lips had been pressed into now a welcoming grin. He waited for the person to make it past the final row of trees and his grin became wider when pink popped out from between the green of the leaves.

"Satsuki."

He had made it a point to discard all honorifics when addressing anyone from the circus, partly because he despised them, and also because he found it strange to address people from a similar age group with honorifics.

"I'm sorry for coming over at this time of night," she apologized with urgency in her words, interrupting Daiki's thoughts about how amazing she looked in the dim lighting of the moon and with only a cardigan draped over her night gown. "But this was the only time I could come out undetected and I had to tell you as soon as possible."

She rushed her words at a speed that took Daiki time to comprehend and when he did, he felt an uneasiness well up in his chest.

Satsuki took a deep breath and placed a hand on her chest to calm herself, her gaze fixed upon Daiki once she deemed herself to have relaxed enough. Her lips were pursed into a fine line and her eyebrows furrowed as she tried to construct a sensible sentence from the mess of words that flurried in the compartment of her brain.

"Tetsu-chan's coming with us to Aodane for the next circus," she finally blurted out. "She's taking part to substitute Sei-kun since he's... unwell. Tetsu-chan won't be in the mansion so you can't save her like we originally planned."

Daiki frowned. He had hoped whatever news she brought to be good but unfortunately luck wasn't on their side.

Daiki sat on the ground and placed a hand on his chin as his forehead creased, trying to come up with an alternative for their escape plan. Satsuki joined him on the ground, a little fidgety as she kept glancing over to the mansion. Daiki could tell she was afraid that someone would realize she was gone and find out that the reason for her absence was to see him. It would be damning for her, but he could sense that she wasn't just worried for her own self.

"What do you suggest we do?"

His brain wasn't made for thinking so he decided to ask her instead. He didn't want to waste time using his grey cells to create a plan; time that could be used for saving Tetsuna. Satsuki was definitely a better thinker than him so leaving it up to her would be the best solution. Although, the timing was possibly couldn't be worse as her state of mind at the moment was clearly not at the best.

"I don't know," the pinkette slumped her shoulders as she let out a hushed whine. "You could go break in now but Tsujiro-sama's in the mansion and I can't guarantee that you won't be caught by anyone – especially Sei-kun."

Daiki sighed. It was true that going in now would be risky for him – and for her – but at what other timing would it be possible? He couldn't stand the thought of letting Tetsuna stay in the mansion for even a second longer, especially with the horrible man.

A thought flashed across his mind at the remembrance of Tsujirou and the tanned male glanced at Satsuki, who looked more restless than he was. His mind returned to the newspaper article he had read before arriving in Loreine and newfound curiousity bubbled inside of him. He wanted to ask her about the time she had first been caught in Tsujirou's hands. He wanted to ask her so much about what he had done to her, and the others, to breed their unwavering loyalty to him. Well, almost unwavering.

He wanted to ask her but wasn't sure if he should.

As if she had sensed the questions bugging him at the back of his mind, Satsuki prompted him to speak, asking what was the matter. Somehow through her look, she indicated that if he had nothing more to discuss, she would like to leave and put herself at ease.

Daiki hesitated, putting effort to organize his string of thoughts as to not hurt her. The topic he was about to touch was a sensitive one after all. Another few seconds passed, and Daiki finally parted his lips to speak, words that he did not expect to say rolling off his tongue.

"Why don't you come with me?"

Satsuki blinked at him, her head cocked to the side as she sent him a puzzled look. She was about to say something when Daiki interrupted with an explanation to his words.

"You... Why don't you come with me and Tetsu once we get her out? Far away from here— from Tsujirou."

There was a hint of longing in the pink hues of her eyes before she closed her eyes and shook her head. Her words came out as a whisper, more hushed than ever, sadder than ever.

"You know I can't do that..."

"Why not?" He leaned in, wanting to see her shadowed face better. His fingers twitched on his lap, tempted to wrap themselves around her hand. "Tsujirou can't do anything to you anymore if you're gone from here."

"That's not it." She shook her head again. "That's not it..."

He waited for her to continue, for her to elaborate. But she didn't. He shifted awkwardly in his current position, wondering what was the problem, when the possible answer came to him in a flash of red.

"Is it..." He swallowed. "Is it because of Seijuro?"

The solemn look she gave was an answer enough.

"If I were to leave," she spoke. "Tsujirou-sama would hurt him." Like he always does.

"Then he can come as well," Daiki suggested. "Along with the others."

"You don't understand," the pinkette clasped her hands tightly as they trembled momentarily. "He... He would never leave. Rather, he can't leave. It's... It's complicated."

What isn't?

Daiki sighed and watched as she got up, excusing herself to return to the mansion. He'd rather not let her leave, but he stayed still as she disappeared into the trees, the darkness swallowing the pink of her hair until he couldn't see it anymore.

He felt helpless. Getting Tetsuna out wouldn't be a problem for him since Satsuki had already given him a method to sneak in the mansion as well as where Tetsuna was located. But his mind kept on going back to the solemn look Satsuki showed him and he started to think of the cost of saving Tetsuna.

Although Satsuki wouldn't be hurt physically by Tsujirou, there would certainly be an emotional one if Tsujirou were to take out his anger on Seijuro. Did he really have to choose between the two people? The choice was supposed to be simple. Tetsuna over anyone else. It should be just that.

Then why did he feel so conflicted?

Satsuki breathed out a relieved sigh once she returned to the safety of her room and instantly headed towards her bed, her cardigan discarded carelessly onto the floor. She wrapped herself in the warm material of her blanket and curled in it, shutting her eyes as she tried to push away all the thoughts that whirled around in her head.

She would be lying if she said she wasn't the least bit delighted at Daiki's suggestion. It was what she wanted more than anything after all. To get away from this wretched residence was a dream come true. But she couldn't. Not when Tsujirou had his pudgy hands wrapped around the chains that kept Seijuro bounded to him.

Satsuki opened her eyes to stare at a wall – or what she assumed to be a wall in the darkness of her room. Most of her memories from childhood were blurry, especially the ones from when she was still with her family, laughing, playing, living. However, her memories from when she was first taken were vivid, haunting her being every chance it had.

She would compare details from her memories to the details she saw now from time to time. She would compare the difference in treatment from Tsujirou between when she first came and now, the difference between the relationships of the first-string members when they first huddled together in the small room where Tetsuna now resided and now, the difference between who Seijuro was and who he now is.

The biggest difference between her memories and the present would certainly be him.

During the earlier days, he seemed more... alive, she would recall. His eyes would have a spark of fire in them and dark circles left his features untouched. His body would show defiance and his head was held higher than it was now. His skin was of a better colour and she vaguely recalled him having a little more meat on his bones.

Oh, the things time could do to a person.

She hated the part of her who kept on reminiscing the past, who held on to the past, wishing that she could turn back time so that none of what was in the present could happen.

Wishing that she had never met Seijuro.

Her lips were shaped into a large 'o' as she watched the boy skillfully shuffle the deck of cards in his small hands. The ground was a little dusty as they sat on their bottoms, but she didn't mind since he didn't. He flipped the cards, he mixed them, he chopped them. He was mesmerizing. It took her a moment to realize that he had offered her the cards, the thinly shaped item arranged neatly into a fan.

He asked her to pick a card, memorize it, and return it to the deck without showing him. She did as told, picking out the ace of spades before returning it. He shuffled the cards once again and arranged them on the ground, displaying the face of every card for her to see.

"Strange," he said. "I don't see your card."

She cocked her head to the side, puzzled, but she agreed. Her card was nowhere to be seen in the deck. There was a strange sense of anticipation as she glanced up to him timidly, wondering what he was going to do next.

"Ah, I think I know where it is."

His hand stretched out towards her to reach to the back of her neck, his fingers gently sweeping aside her pink locks as they approached. She felt herself tensing up, a hint of pink dusting her cheeks as he leaned closer to her. She relaxed once he moved away and in an instant the relief turned into astonishment once she saw the ace of spades held between his fingers.

"Is this your card?"

It was a tender smile that he had offered, and she squealed in delight, confirming his words. She asked him to do it again, to amaze her again. But he declined.

"It's getting late," he uttered, tilting his chin to point out her awaiting mother. "Maybe next time."

The sun was slowly disappearing from the sky thus marking the end of their play date. She pouted in protest but reluctantly admitted that she had to get home. She got up on her feet, dusting the fabric of her dress once she did and thanked the boy with a bright smile. She was about to join her mother when she was reminded of something she had forgotten.

"I'm Satsuki, 7 years old!" She chirped gleefully. "What's your name?"

The boy stared up to her large, shimmering eyes, a moment of wonder reflected in his ruby ones. She found his eyes the most stunning of all the ones she had ever seen. He got up to his feet, dusting his pants like she did with her dress, and once again offered the same tender smile.

"Seijuro," he said. "Also 7 years old."

"We're the same age." She giggled. "Well, see you again, Seijuro-kun!"

Satsuki spent the journey home telling her mother excitedly about her new friend, her hands waving in wild gestures as she told her about how amazing he was at card tricks. Her mother only offered a fond nod or hum occasionally where necessary as she listened, pleased that her child had found another friend to play with.

The journey home felt short to Satsuki who was overflowing with joy. She couldn't wait for the sun to rise so that she could meet the boy once again. So that he could once more show her tricks that dazzled and amazed her to her heart's content. She just couldn't wait, and the excitement caused her to feel restless as she stood behind her mother who tried to search her purse for the house keys.

Satsuki rocked on her heels as she removed her eyes from her mother and decided to look at the bushes that put a barrier between her home and the neighbours', behind them a thick, dark forest. The bushes had beautiful red roses which she loved to gaze at from her window and she found herself counting the number of roses that decorated the thick bush to pass the time. However, the sight of a familiar shade of crimson made her lose count and she couldn't help but rush over to give a friendly greeting.

"Seijuro-kun!" She grinned as she twirled around to the other side of the bush to see his face. "What are you doing here?"

The boy smiled at her.

"I just remembered a game I wanted to play with you," he said softly. "Want to play it now?"

"Now?" She was elated at the mention of the new game but remembered her mother, knowing she wouldn't like it if she wandered off to play in the night.

The boy nodded. "We can only play it at night."

She wondered why he was whispering.

"Okay," she said in a hushed voice, attempting to mimic him. "But only for a while. Otherwise mama will scold me."

"Deal."

He beckoned for her to follow him into the forest, offering a hand for her to hold as he lead her in. There was a feeling of uneasiness welling up in her chest and she started to regret her decision of playing this new game. Her grip on the boy's hand tightened and he took her deeper, and deeper, and deeper into the forest. She tugged at his hand and came to a stop once she realized she couldn't see the entrance they came from anymore, asking him if they had to go further in to play the game.

The boy let go of her hand and turned to face her, the friendliness his features held melted away into a sad gaze.

"Sorry."

All of a sudden, she felt a strong pair of arms wrap themselves around her torso as they lifted her, a large hand holding something like a cloth covering her mouth thus preventing her from calling out to her mother. Her heart raced in her chest and warm tears gushed from her eyes as she wriggled and struggled and scratched and kicked. However, the owner of the arms was too strong.

The last thing she remembered before she passed out was the triumphed voice of an older man praising the boy, who only stared up regretfully at her.

Satsuki woke up with tears in her eyes as she was reminded by memories of that day. After her abduction, everything started turning to hell. Tsujirou would beat her senseless in order to establish dominance and every time she attempted to run away, Seijuro would catch her per his orders.

She remembered trying to convince Seijuro to escape with her one particular day as he nursed her injuries afflicted by Tsujirou. He agreed, and they tried, only to be caught by Tsujirou moments later. Seijuro was the one who suffered the heavy blows from him as he was the one Tsujirou blamed. She remembered herself screaming and begging for forgiveness, for Tsujirou to stop hurting the boy, but he only grinned and told her it was a lesson for them before he dragged him away, leaving her in the small prison of a room. She remembered him returning Seijuro to the small room, the boy shaking violently with wide eyes and traces of tears on his cheeks. She curled up to Seijuro on their bed that particular night, sobbing apologies to him who merely held her close to his small chest. He never stopped trembling.

Until now, she wasn't sure what had happened to him when Tsujirou took him up to the mansion. But she was sure that it was the breaking point for the redhead. From that day onwards, Seijuro lost the life in his eyes. He became a loyal puppet to the man and she decided to be a good child for as long as it took.

Tsujirou started ordering them to lure in other children to add to his 'collection' soon after that. First, he targeted other children from their district, completing the to-be-members of the first-string. Then, after Tsujirou had established his authority, they moved on to children in other towns. Fear was instilled in every single one of them, and they obeyed his orders, his needs. Just like the good children they were.

A knock on the door snapped her out of her thoughts and brought her up to her feet. Satsuki took a moment to rub the tears from her eyes before walking over to the door and twisting the door knob to greet her visitor.

It was Ryouta at the door, displaying one of his kind, sunshine smiles as he greeted her good morning. She returned the greeting with a similar smile and asked what was the matter.

"Breakfast is ready. Junpei-san told me to call you." He said before tilting his head to the side. "Are you okay?"

He pointed out the traces of tears that trailed horizontally on the sides of her face and she shook her head, assuring him that it was nothing.

"You sure?"

"Yup. I'm fine, really." She flashed another smile. "I'll join you once I'm done cleaning up."

Ryouta nodded, then he paused.

"Everything's going to be okay, Satsukicchi." He uttered, placing a hand securely on her shoulder. "I promise."

She wasn't sure what he was referring to, if he knew what was going through her mind at the moment, but she took his words with a grateful smile. Satsuki returned into her room once Ryouta left and headed for the shower. She hoped that the cool water would help her relax, help her stay away from her thoughts. But her mind kept wandering off to a blurred image of her happy family – of what they could have been.

She wondered, if there was even a future waiting for them beyond the circus. If there was a happy ending waiting for them. If only there was a way for them to gain total freedom. If only Tsujirou was...

Oh.

Thanks for reading!