I was laughing with Avery and Blaise when the doors to the Great Hall opened with a band. Weasley stormed in with a face as red as his hair. Harry followed close behind with Granger tucked under his arm.

"MALFOY," he bellowed as he made his way toward me, his face contorted with rage. He grabbed me by the back of my shirt and pulling me backward off the bench at the table and thrusting me up against the wall. "HOW DARE YOU DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT TO HERMIONE YOU BASTARD, YOU'RE LUCKY I DON'T KILL YOU HERE AND NOW."

"I'd be luckier if you did," I said quietly, but Ron was too busy screaming to notice it. I noticed Harry's flash of concern, before the mask of anger fell back over his face.

"YOU'RE A DESPICABLE PIECE OF SHIT. WE'D ALL BE BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU." Harry opened his mouth, then closed it again. "YOU'VE BULLIED HARRY SINCE YOU MET HIM. YOU TRIED TO KILL HIM AT THE START OF THIS YEAR. BUT IT'S ALWAYS ENDED OKAY. HARRY COULD HAVE DIED, BUT HE WAS FINE, SO WE LET IT GO WHEN HE ASKED, BUT YOU THREATEN TO KILL HERMIONE? YOU LEAVE HER TO FREEZE? THAT'S THE END OF THE LINE FOR YOU MALFOY. I SWEAR I'M GOING TO KILL YOU, YOU WORTHLESS EXCUSE OF A FUCKING WIZARD. I WISH YOU WOULD FUCKING DIE!" And then he paused, gasping for air, and Hermione was behind him, shaking with cold and fear as she stared at me with wide eyes, and Harry was glaring at me, and Ron had just told me what I had been thinking for the past year, so it wasn't just me that thought it, and if Ron did then surely other people did too, and he was right, and I needed to get out of there, I needed to get out of this world, and I just needed to die.

I felt Ron loosen his grip on me, and only when I noticed that he was blurry did I realize I was crying. I pushed past him, striding out of the Great Hall, waiting until I was in the hallway before I began sprinting off toward the west balcony, faintly hearing the door thud shut behind me. I took the stairs two at a time, feeling my feet hit each step, feeling the blood rushing through my veins, feeling my pulse jump, feeling everything for the last time. I had done some terrible things, but I had truly thought Hermione was going to die, and I didn't even feel anything about it until Weasley had been screaming at me about it. And then I had felt everything at once. That was my problem, I either felt everything or nothing at all. I made for the door at the top of the stairs, only to hit it head on and it not budge at all. I pounded on it with my fists, beating it until my hands were bruised and I was sobbing, tears pouring out my eyes, streaming down my face, my nose running like a river, my sobs loud and echoing down the hallway. I collapsed against the door, sliding down it until I was laying on the floor, my face pressed against the cold of the stone floor.

"Draco." I heard my name, but I ignored it, as I didn't particularly care. I just wanted to die. More than I had ever wanted it. But I didn't have the motivation or the energy now to go to the east tower. I wanted to die but I didn't want to work for it.

"Oh, Draco, please look at me. Draco, please. Draco. Draco, Draco, Draco. I've never really noticed how beautiful your name is until now. Draco Malfoy. I guess that's what happens when you-" He cut himself off abruptly, then continued. "Draco, after last year, I found a way to spell them so that no one would be able to get past if they had bad intentions up here. I don't know if you tried alohomora or not, but if you didn't think to, it wouldn't have worked anyway. I am so, so goddamn sorry about every word Ron said in there. None of it was true, he was just ang-"

"No," I rasped, my voice hoarse from the crying. "Don't tell me he didn't mean it. You and I both know that he meant it. And he was right, so I don't know why you're trying to tell me it wasn't true. I'm a monster. She could have died," and here my voice cracked and the tears started fresh. "She could have died and if no one had confronted me about it, I would have felt nothing. Unless I was forced to think about my part in it, I would have felt no guilt." At this point, I looked up at Harry. "What have I done? What- what if she had died? And no one knew it was my fault? All my fault, just like everything else. I'm a fucking monster, why do you not just let me die? Why, Harry, why?"

"Because, Draco." And here he paused, and I could feel his gaze on me, looking over every inch of my disheveled form. "Because there's a Quidditch match tomorrow. And if you die, they won't have a Seeker for me to play. Because I want you in that Quidditch match and every one after. Because I want to see you laugh at Avery's enthusiasm over mashed potatoes. Because I want to see you eat mashed potatoes yourself. Because I need a Potions partner. Because I need to see your smile. Because I need you to live long enough that the burns on your back will stop hurting. Because I need to watch your bruises fade. Because I want to see the way your hair flops over your face when you're focused on your assignment. Because I want to see the way your beautiful eyes light up whenever you're presented with a fun challenge. Because I want to see the way you strut when you're happy. Because I want to see you every day in school. Because I need someone to banter with. Because you're the one person who never immediately loved me because I was Harry Potter. Because you still don't love me. Because you never cared who I was, it was always about what I did that you cared about. Because of every single little thing about you that makes up who you are. Because you're Draco Malfoy and you deserve the world."

I had stopped crying by the time he got to my hair. I was staring at him in awe at this point. That he cared enough to have noticed that much about me. It was almost as much as I had noticed about him. I stood up awkwardly, my muscles stiff from being in that position for so long. I limped over to him, my right leg still trying to get the blood circulating. I wrapped my arms tight around him before giving him a chance to react. I love you, I thought. Out loud, I whispered, "Thank you," into his ear. This. This was the only reason I was still living. He had enchanted the door itself not to let me through no matter what I tried if I was planning to kill myself. And he had just given nineteen reasons that he didn't want me to die. He had just shown how much he cared. He may never love me, but at least he would definitely care.

So I don't know about you guys, but I think this is a somewhat decent chapter. I have like two chapters left until I'm caught up to where I'm writing now, because I'm currently trying to write a really long chapter. Like, a ten page chapter or something. But it would really help if I had some plot ideas. And some ideas for characters. Or even just thoughts on what I've got so far. I just really want to hear your feedback on what I have so far. I've worked harder on this story than any other, and I really want to hear your opinions.

In other news, I have a new story, "In Honor of Stan Lee" that's just how some different characters in the Marvel universe reacted to Stan Lee's death. I hope you'll pop over there, give it a read through, and maybe even leave a review on that too! Thank you!