Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha in any way. So sorry. Let's start a rebellion? XD

Disclaimer2: I do not own one of my favorite, already-ended *sob* TV shows, Harper's Island, nor do I own any of its elements (though it's a good show :D).

A/N: This chap's all about how Kags' first day plays out. Let's see what happens! (Just kidding. The chapter can wait.) As you can see by these figures here *points to chalkboard's writing and shapes and equations with stick*, we are only about a tenth through the story thus far, and it's rated "M" for language and LIMES (plural form) meaning— *throws baton and waves arms in the air* OF COURSE THERE'S GONNA BE MORE FUCKING INU/KAG! Bitches, get OFF my BACK! (Just kidding (again).) But seriously—who the ef would torture you like that? Not me, since I did the math. *narrows eyes* But there's gonna be tons of fluff, limes, and lemons throughout this story, but lemons won't be coming so soon. The others, though… *rubs hands evilly* By the way, I'm in love with all the Final Act songs. :P

(Kagome POV)

Just a curious question to all you people out there, reading my tortured tale, laughing at my pain—which I hate you for… If you got in trouble because you did something to a particular wall, could you still get grounded? I mean, you did do nothing to the ground, but you did something pretty big to that wall, so maybe you should be walled instead of grounded?

It's kind of a confusing topic, isn't it? Maybe I shouldn't have brought it up. Perhaps I'm giving too much away for even writing about it.

Not that I'm giving info about anything away.

But seriously: grounded or walled?

Eh. It was just a suggestion.

Is it just me, or does that eh look like a feh and keh? Have I been hanging around Inuyasha for too long?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Wait, why am I even ranting about this? This isn't a rant, it's a war zone!

Psh, no, it isn't, but I've always wanted to say that.

…

Buddha, I never get a break.

LIFE AT DEMON SLAYER SCHOOL

10: Suck It, Kinky-Hoe

Surprises. They suck.

If you haven't noticed, I've never been the one to absolutely love surprises. Like when I found out Sango and Miroku were my roommates. Or like when I saw Kouga standing outside the elevator. Or like when my dad randomly appeared to one of my classes to yell at me like the bad schoolgirl I am. Or like that time when I saw that person in that one place, but they weren't supposed to be there, so I went ahead and freaked out on that person only to find out they were supposed to be there in that one place.

Ha, just kidding. That's never happened…

…more than five times.

Point is, surprises. They just suck.

—~*~—~*~—~*~—

I have just now noticed how nasty throw-up is. Honestly. It's not great—at all. I mean, you re-taste everything you ate, but now, it also has that irresistible tang of your own stomach bile in it—you know, the taste that makes you want to purge even more.

Meh, throw-up. It's not pretty.

My hatred for puke being mixed with surprises doesn't make this any better. So, of course Kami would bless me with something as beautiful as seeing Onigumo's alter ego walk through the science door and to his desk coolly, as if he's not stirred unpleasant memories or anything in me whatsoever.

Ugh. I wish I had some Tylenol.

But the moment I saw his face, everything froze. And just like that, my lunch wasn't in my stomach anymore, but poured all over my desk. For some reason, it didn't look right to not have a plate to put it on, but when it was in liquid—

Ew. I'll just shut up now.

Right now, however, I'm in an even more awkward position. Instead of having multiple pairs of eyes glued to me in the classroom, I'm faced with stony silence in the hallway. I have to say, though, that the view of the school is nice up from Sesshy-sama's shoulder.

Just kidding. I really have the urge to jump off a cliff.

"I'm fine," I squeak, hoping it'll be enough for him to leave me alone. Clearly, he's deaf or slow, because he continues walking down the hall. Grrrr… "I SAID I WAS FINE!"

Thump. Ow. I expected it from Inuyasha, but who knew the King of Fluff would let a girl fall to the floor as if she deserved every bit of the pain?

He narrows his violet eyes at me and I sneer back—you know, maybe if I start a staring contest, I can beat him. I only end up disappointed, though, 'cause this dude's like a freaking brick wall—impenetrable. My eye-daggers aren't working again, and it's starting to tick me off.

I feel like killing someone. I should post ads in the newspaper for an assassin.

Wait, why haven't I done that? Oh, yeah—killing's illegal. I forgot.

Gosh darn it, where's that wall?

The Ice Cube walks back to class, obviously unwilling to cooperate—or is it deal with?—my stubborn attitude. I huff, wipe off my jeans, then stomp noisily to the elevator before pressing my floor's button as if it's a sumo-wrestler's belly. To my disappointment, it doesn't jiggle in the slightest. I feel myself frowning before the pure disgustingness of my thoughts overcomes me and I shudder for even thinking that.

Since everyone believes me to be in the infirmary—which I refuse to go to because of my hatred of all things medical—I decide to slack off in my room. For a while, I watch a re-run of American Idol, where the United States shows their true stupidity for even thinking up this show. But it's the only thing on, so I just solemnly suffer until I eventually get bored five minutes later. I turn off the television and glance around the room, taking in Miroku and Sango's things for the first time. Depressing, I know, but if you haven't noticed, a lot of crap has happened, so why would I pay attention to something as inferior as decorating?

No offense to you interior designers out there, though.

The top bunk—Miroku's, if I'm right—is surrounded by the strangest objects. There's his extra set of arm-things—prayer beads, I know that part of it, but the wrap-around-thingamajigger? I have no clue what that's called. Then there's a Buddha poster—I didn't even know they made those!—and a few ties for his danged rat's tail hair. He doesn't have an alarm clock because he wakes up to the "sun smiling, wind dancing, and birds singing" (shoot me, I beg of you). Oh, and, of course, there are porn magazines hanging out from under his mattress, apparently trying to hide from the world.

This would've worked in most cases, but I think it's much too visible when there are only a few boards supporting his mattress—meaning Sango must fall asleep with those magazines hanging in her eyesight the entire time.

That poor, poor girl. She has to deal with Miroku day and night. Man, and I thought I had it bad being his adoptive sister.

Below Miroku's purple bed is Sango's coral one. She has Hiraikoutsu underneath it—how does it transport so much?—and a reading lamp along with a few romance novels. Well, that explains her "Mr. Right" lecture, doesn't it? Stupid hopeless romantic.

No offense to you hopeless romantics out there, though. No, wait, YES, offense to you!

She has a few pictures of her family; I recognize her father in all of them, and a little boy who looks just like her, around twelve years old. In a few others, there's other people—all men—wearing black and differently-colored combat uniforms. In a summery one, there's a beautiful older woman holding a younger Sango in her arms. I'm guessing that it's her dead mother, and suddenly feel like I've been intruding in her life for even glancing at the photos. Weird, I know, but I've never really been comfortable with the dead ever since Baa-chan passed. It's just not my thing.

And at least I know where Sango gets her violent, tomboy behavior from. Growing up with all men? How torturous, vile, and unacceptable!

I bet Miroku's mad that she doesn't have any sisters. Gah.

Besides an abundant amount of pink eye shadow and other necessities like hair bands, I find nothing else interesting. After rinsing my mouth—nasty throw-up—I change into some old clothes for my next class: Auto-Mechanics with Ginkoutsu. He looked pretty fierce in Home Economics despite him being mute—which I find sort of entertaining—but maybe he's a good teacher…?

Meh. I shouldn't hope. So far, Kami's proven that they enjoy reading my mind and twisting my thoughts to make my life a living eighth hell. And trust me, eighth's the worst you can get, so you should never wish to be there.

Like, EVER.

I decide to strengthen my security for the next class—I put on THE OUTFIT. It's one my father has forced me to wear ever since I was six, when I began helping him out with things mechanical and technical. When I was younger, these things fit perfectly and a little loosely, but now… Well, I look like even more slutty than I did with Sango's I totally effed-up on your clothes clothing. Honestly. I do. And why my father hasn't bought me new attire I'll never understand.

Oh, wait, he's a backstabber. Enough of an explanation, yes?

THE OUTFIT has a black cotton, spaghetti-strapped tank top that now fits my waist tightly, though it doesn't cover up my belly button or its small blue ring. A few years ago, Mom was ever-so-loving enough to modify it slightly, adding chest-pads for when I hit puberty—ew; I hate the mention of anything sexual—though that doesn't help at all since it acts as a push-up bra, enhancing my chest instead of covering it completely.

Eep.

I had jean capris that were loose, but now they fit my wide hips snugly, no longer needing the support of a belt. The bad part? The tips of the capris got tight on my thighs, so my still-loving-me-so-much mother had hacked them off, making my once perfect pair of pants now denim booty shorts.

Double eep.

I can't do anything about the pants, but I've been able to add an old, flannel, country button-down that loosely hangs around my shoulders. Sometimes I button it up, but most times, I either have to tie it around my middle or remove it—which I do not want to do—

Wait, I can't give away what I do or do not want. Kami is after me, watching my every move, hearing my every thought. I know it.

Okay, since when am I paranoid?

Anyways, besides the overcoat and tight clothing, I also have to wear my hair up in a secure ponytail. I don't wear any jewelry, though I do have to keep my tool belt on at all times. I put on solid-based, concealing, oil-resistant shoes, but I never wear gloves because I love the feeling of grease on my fingers.

Don't judge me. For all I know, you've lost your insanity and just broke out of a nuthouse to read this story. If you are reading this story, then I don't think you're normal amongst any lines whatsoever.

I just broken the fourth wall, didn't I?

$#!%.

Around the time I finish gathering all of my equipment, it's two minutes prior to next period. I jog down the hall and into the elevator, humming as the door shuts behind me. Then I realize I'm humming to the crappy elevator music, and feel my blood boil at the thought of even slightly enjoying something so irritatingly annoying. Then I wonder why Inuyasha and I hadn't noticed the music when we were—

Well, anyways…

With my luck, the bell rings for class to begin when the door opens, and I automatically rush out. But with my luck (again), you know what happens: I charge head-first into a hard, muscular chest, and feel a brain-ache come on. Great. Not only did I run into a guy—

Wait. A guy? Oh, please, Kami, don't let it be—

"Hey, Kagome," he grunts, smirking at me, then scanning my body. I cringe from disgust, not shiver from pleasure. "So, I'm taking it you have Auto-Mechanics next?"

"Gee, how'd you guess?" I say with a roll of my eyes as I climb off him.

Bankoutsu just laughs before getting up himself. "Well"—insert supposedly charming smile here—"you have the right attire, for one thing." He winks at this as we begin walking to Ginkoutsu's. It seems he hasn't noticed how interesting I find the wall, and how my body's practically skimming it while he saunters down the center of the hallway. "Besides, I have that class next, and the teacher told me to look for you."

Oh. Nice to know they care and you totally volunteered.

No, that wasn't heavy sarcasm.

Really, if you haven't caught on, I'm being sarcastic!

When we enter the room, tools drop, noises stop, and everyone stares. I subconsciously cower away from the attention, hiding behind Bankoutsu until I remember he's a player who thinks I'll fall in love with him. Then I just consider walking out of the door until I hear someone yell, "KAGS!" and another voice declare, "WE'RE BACK HERE!"

I hate you, Inuyasha, Kouga.

I mentally bang my head against the wall as I walk to the back of the room, where Kouga and Inuyasha have been situated at their station. I avoid all eyes on me, and pretend as if they aren't noticing me—as if they aren't dissecting with their gazes, eating me in their heads, or wondering why a hot chick's here.

Not my words. I'm the furthest thing from "hot". Well, besides Kinky-Hoe and her honeybees, that is.

The boys have both changed into old, torn, and comfortable clothes: the type just right for working with grease. Kouga's wearing a plain tee shirt with medium-sized, ripped jeans whereas Inuyasha has another red muscle shirt but with a white wife beater underneath. He wears matching red sweats to complete the look, and for a moment, if I open my mouth just slightly, I know it'll drop and I'll begin drooling.

We get to work, Kouga taking out his tools from an old gym bag he has on the ground. (Apparently, my father has been paying more for the Home Economics classes than Auto-Mechanics—another thing I'll have to nag him about.) I hear Inuyasha growl warningly, but I focus more on the run-down, rusting lawnmower engine lying on our work bench. I'm guessing we're all in teams when it comes to Auto-Mechanics as well, since Bankoutsu is now grudgingly being dragged to a table with a big wrestler and a bald guy. I wonder how those freaks are even young enough for high school when I feel Inuyasha's growl turn into a snarl. I'm confused at first until I feel something on my partially exposed shoulder that makes me jump and slap whoever's touching me.

Ah, a boy. Saw that one coming, didn't we?

This guy has a long black braid similar to Bankoutsu's, but this guy's is thinner, more, I don't know, girly. His face isn't strikingly handsome, striking in general, or appealing like Bankoutsu or Inuyasha's, either—heck, this guy isn't even as good-looking as Kouga or—shudder—Miroku! And yet, he has a cocky smirk on his face as if he knows he'll win my heart.

For some reason, I'd rather be locked in a room where Inuyasha and Bankoutsu are beating each to a blood pulp than be with this guy. Aw, hecks, I'd probably watch those two beat up each other for fun. That's how negative I am with men right now.

He rubs his face with that stupid smile on. "Hey there, beautiful," he/she drones and instantly, I feel my eye twitch.

Oh, hell no! I am not putting up with this!

"Now, you listen here, buddy!" I snap, jerking myself away as I send him eye-swords. "I—"

"Fuck off, Hiten!" Inuyasha growls, and I jump at the noise. Hey, this isn't right. I'm supposed to show my equal rights and defend myself, not be protected by some guy who's practically molested me ever since we first argued over a darned bunk bed.

Hiten isn't as breezy as Bankoutsu; instead of smirking, he gets mad. "What? Hogging the new girl all to yourself, Takahashi?"

"No," a new voice says, and I regret ever considering being with him and Inuyasha. After nonchalantly resting his arm around my neck and on my shoulders, Bankoutsu smiles. "He's sharing."

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I was never meant to share! Get off, get off, GET OFF!

Having enough—feeling my muscles tightening, my miko powers growing, and my rage finally getting the better of me—I smack my wrench into all three of their skulls. "YOU FUCKING IDIOTS! I CAME HERE TO WORK ON AUTO-REPAIRS, NOT PLAY FUCKING 'BACHELORETTE'! LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE BEFORE I SHOVE ALL OF MY FUCKING TOOLS UP YOUR ASS—NO, WAIT, I CAN'T DO THAT, BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL FUCKING TOOLS! YOU ASSHOLES!"

Everything falls silent, and my grip on the almost-murder weapon loosens. But as Inuyasha stares at me in complete surprise, Bankoutsu in wonder, Hiten in fury, every other boy in fear, and Ginkoutsu in total indifference, I've never felt so bewildered in my entire lifetime.

I've never cursed that much. Never. Not even when Hobo got on my last nerve. Then again, I've never had this many men chasing after me, either. Well, if chasing were the correct term, that is. More like annoying the hecks out of me.

But dang, what happened to my "watch the language" rule? What am I now? Do I not value my own values?

"Kagome, calm—" I cut Kouga off by punching him in the face. He doesn't fall or stumble, but rubs it a little, being taken off guard.

Honestly, it felt good. But not good enough to lock away all of my negative emotions.

Finally, Inuyasha murmurs, "Keh, leave the wench alone. She's obviously here to work on fucking cars, not have you guys fuck her on 'em."

We all stand there with wide eyes, kind of thunderstruck that Inuyasha of all people would be the one to break up a fight, and at that, perhaps protect me. Even when Hiten grumbles and goes back to his station where a fat kid awaits, even when Bankoutsu returns to the buff guy and baldy—all I can do is keep staring at the boy who's annoyed the heck out of me, made me slightly content, chased my sanity away, kissed my virgin lips, and sent me on so many mood swings that I just don't know where I stand with him—friends, frenemies, enemies, something more, something less? Why am I even thinking like this?

Why? Well, obviously, the apocalypse has arrived, and I was one of the unlucky people to miss the memo.

Just my luck. Next thing you know, I'll get miraculously pregnant and not even know about it. Like on that one show, I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant. Gee, I wonder how they got such a creative, unique, smart title?

Sarcasm, people. It runs deep in my veins.

I stand there, eye twitching, in total shock. It isn't until Inuyasha barks, "Why are ya wearin' skimpy clothes, anyway? Are you selling yourself?" that I wake up from my trance.

Hold in your anger, Kagome, I thought to myself fiercely. Hold in—

Thud. "FUCK!"

Oops, sorry, Inuyasha. But your jaw and my fist just had an automatic attraction, you know? It couldn't be stopped; no matter how much I told my fist to stay away, it still ran to your jaw without fear or hesitance of the consequences. So sorry. I really am. I'm sorry that they fell for each other, that my fist just couldn't keep its distance, that they were like opposite magnets or two parts of the same soul.

Bull-crap, I'm sorry. "Jack-hole," I mutter, surprised I actually punched him harder than I have anyone else. You know how I went on about how I was kind of astonished that I didn't hurt him all that much? Yeah. Right now, all those thoughts just went down the drain.

What a jerk.

"Mutt, you suck at socializing with women," Kouga says, being the first to actually work on our engine. I don't respond to Inuyasha's mumblings, and instead, pull out my screwdriver to begin removing the filter. I hear Inuyasha sigh as he grabs a tool as well and starts helping out.

I hope that'll be the last piece of drama I'll have for today. But no, my life has to suck.

Ef.

Well, at least I feel better about myself now.

It turns out, Inuyasha, Kouga, and I were born to handle mechanics. I'm sure of this because we finish pulling apart and putting back together our engine in less than half of the class period. For the rest of the time, we lounge in the cool metal chairs, Kouga going on about something I don't care for across the table. All I know is that it must be exciting, because he keeps acting as if explosions are going off, and at that, pretends to hold a gun a few times. A movie, my mind tells me, though I'm awfully distracted with Mr. Butthole sitting right next to me, being so close that our biceps are a hair away from grazing each other.

Gods, why haven't I moved? Oh, yeah, because my mind's off. I mean, really. If my brain's listening to a word Kouga says, it must be on drugs. That's it. There are no other explanations. Just imagine: Kouga saying something interesting.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

That was good laugh, wasn't it?

It's official. You've gone over to the dark side.

Since when did this become Star Wars? If we're in a galaxy far, far away, then where's Yoda, Princess Leia, Luke Skywalker, and Han Solo? I wanna get their autographs!

… Sigh. I spend too much time with Souta.

Perhaps you do. But really, Kagome.

Pff, but really, SC.

SC?

Yeah. "Sango's conscience" is a mouthful.

Don't spend your time using nicknames. You have something more important to do.

…?

Shouldn't you try to make up with Inuyasha?

HAHAHAHAHAHA! That's funny!

Kagome…

Don't you have other places to be? Like, maybe SM?

SM?

Sango's mind. Duh.

You don't listen, do you?

Aw, man. I should write about that in my bio section, shouldn't I? "I don't listen much."

You unnerve me.

I love you, too, SC.

She's about to tack a response—we all know she is—but before she can get to it, I hear Inuyasha whisper, "You were really that pissed, huh?"

"What?" I ask dumbly. Gods, I hate sounding like a blonde.

No offense to you blondes out there, though.

After he gives me an aggravated look, I hiss, "Yeah, I was. Who the heck says that to another person?" I swear, this guy have never even knows of the word "manners"—I doubt he's even heard the advice "be nice".

Oi.

"Feh, stupid wench," he mutters, not looking at me. "You're the one revealing yourself."

I furrow my eyebrows at him. "First of all, I don't want to wear this. Second, why do you even care if people can see me or not?" That's when it hits me: Why does he care?

He turns slightly pink, but doesn't say anything. This Kagome refuses to give up, so she glares Inuyasha down until he finally gives in like the puppy he is.

Because I am his trainer, gosh darn it, and my dog will not get out of control.

And it felt really weird saying that. Like, even weirder than going into Kohl's and asking for a Big Wac. It was just that weird.

"Kagome?"

"Hm?" Then it hits me—

Holy crap, Inuyasha said my name! I hyperventilate, screaming, "I'M NOT READY TO DIE!"

Oh, wait. That actually came out loud, didn't it?

Ignoring everyone's worried looks, I just chuckle nervously. There really is no way to get out of this, is there?

"Keh, Kagome's just afraid of boys breaking her petite vagina. I repeat: PETITE VAGINA."

I don't care about the hit list order anymore. I don't care about what's illegal and what I can do. All I know is that the urge to strangle Inuyasha right now has never been so strong before.

And yet, I stay seated, practically wheezing for air. I sputter, "W-what?" How does someone even draw that conclusion? I mean, I'm pretty sure I'm normal-sized… I think…

Oh, my gods, I'm not small, am I?

Wait, why am I insecure about that size?

"YOU COCKY MORON!" I yell at the idiot next to me, though he just smirks at my choice of words. "How could— That's so— Why— My v-van-jinn-uh—" Sigh. I can't even say THAT WORD."I hate you," I mumble darkly.

Inuyasha snickers, and I glower at him with full-on eye-daggers. He doesn't seem to notice, and if he does, then he doesn't mind.

Darned, arrogant son of a sire.

Or so said the Insane Fan-Midget.

"You know, I don't think I should've just lied like that," Inuyasha absentmindedly ponders aloud, and I can feel my pupils burn him down like the stupid person he is.

Wait, what's that warm thing on my—

Oh.

Well.

Um…

Part of me's ready to slap Inuyasha for even thinking of putting his hand on my thigh, but the other part of me is too stunned to do anything. Electricity springs throughout me again, and as much as I try to avoid it, I fail miserably. Inuyasha's warmth is so welcoming—I want to crawl into his core and sleep there, no matter how creepy that sounds. I want him to touch more of me, I want to—

NOOOOOOOOOOO! I do not want anything from Inuyasha!

His hand's gentle in movement, light as a feather on my skin; I have to practically draw blood from my lip to resist moaning. Our skin contacting tickles, sort of, and I'm on fire, ignited by his touch. Then his hand travels upward, skimming over my jeans until—

OH MY— Guhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. My poor lip; it's being abused so much.

I scan around the room, trying to see if anyone's noticed just where Inuyasha's fingers are located. When I confirm no one's watching, I shoot Inuyasha a nasty glare that he quickly wipes away by pressing into a certain sensitive area.

Buddha, if I wasn't so out of it right now, he'd be bleeding from the eyes.

Luckily, I'm saved before I do anything stupid, like having my back arch or letting out a loud groan. "DUDES! I'M TRYING TO SPEAK!" Kouga snaps, glaring at Inuyasha, who removes his hands from my womanhood. "WHY ARE YOU GIVING KAGS GOO-GOO EYES? GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY WOMAN!"

You really think he'd learn.

After a good hammer to the face, Kouga quiets down, but unfortunately decides to sit next to me. Well, I guess it's not all that bad, because it'll probably keep Inuyasha away. But it's still pretty horrible, because the first thing out of his mouth is "So, how do you think you'll do in slayer practice? What kind of skills do you have?"

I narrow my eyes at him and fib through my teeth. "I'm going to kick butt—if my use of weaponry and the multiple red bumps on people's heads and faces isn't enough to tell you that already…" He shakes his head furiously, and I smirk.

But the smile flies away when he asks once more, "Do you have anything in your favor besides rage and strength?"

"Uh…no?" I think that was supposed to be question. I really don't know, though. Should I reveal that I have spiritual powers? Miroku obviously can see my "powerful, immense" aura, but can other people as well? If they can't, can I just pretend to be a normal human who doesn't have to do anything?

Or will I become Sango on steroids?

I shiver. Happy thoughts, happy thoughts… "Nevermind my skills," I mock, making Kouga cringe at my behavior. I resist the urge of laughing deviously. "What're you guys good at?"

"I'm the finest in the speed department for my awesome track abilities," Kouga brags. "I'm also one of the best in our combat sessions." I give him an extremely bored look that seems to bruise his ego. Thank gods for that; now I just have to do it to Inuyasha.

Kouga and I stare at him expectantly, though it must be obviously I'm still mad about him feeling me up, the perv. "What?" Inuyasha snaps, appearing irritated already.

"Share what you're good at, butthole," Kouga says straightforwardly. Obviously, he already knows what Inuyasha can do, and besides being good at swords and swimming, I don't know all that much about Inuyasha's "skills", for lack of a better term.

"Keh, I'm a swordsman and dirty fighter," he replies, and doesn't push it any further. I wonder what he means when he technically said he fought dirty—does he mean he's an unfair person or his technique is sloppy?

The rest of the time, Kouga talks about something, but once again, I don't listen and begin drifting off into Let's Imagine I'm Having Fun Land. There, unicorns give you delectable treats, elves who attend to your every need, and most importantly, there are murderous fairies roaming about, eager to be paid anything to kill someone else. Hired assassins, if you will; I have the feeling I'd enjoy being able to finally fill out my hit list without any interferences.

Oh, it's the Promised Land, all right.

—~*~—~*~—~*~—

(Narrative POV)

Inuyasha didn't know what Kagome was thinking about, but he kept reveling in how amazing it felt to touch her again. He kept reliving that moment she stepped through the doors, her enticing scent blowing into the room like a summer breeze. Of course, if he was full-dog, his tongue would've automatically popped out at the sight of her outfit. How it revealed her creamy, silky skin—how her torso looked so tasty in that top, her belly button irresistible with that innocent earring inside, how her ponytail revealed her sexy, slender neck to the world, begging to be greeted by his tongue and lips, how her pants accented her curves greatly, making her flawless hips even more appetizing, how endlessly beautiful her legs were, perfect for wrapping around a narrow waist…

My narrow waist.

Inuyasha completely hardened at the thought, then held in his groan. He hadn't noticed how excited Inu Jr. had become until he actually imagined it: him and Kagome on his bed, their clothes tossed everywhere, Kagome underneath him, her raven locks wild as she gazed at him with those infinitely baffling blue eyes—

Oh, fuck, Inuyasha was thinking about it again.

Wait, since when was he such a sap?

He thought of unhappy thoughts—puppies dying (those poor, fallen comrades), his mother crying (he hated tears), and even Kouga in a fundoshi, trying to seduce him. Finally, the last one made his pants flat again, but Inuyasha still had to urge to throw-up for even having to resort to thoughts like that.

But the electricity between him and Kagome—that'd been undeniable. It was weird how one touch made them both weak, begging for more. He was surprised how she could argue with him as if they were archenemies, yet talk to him as if he were her equal and weren't a useless half-demon.

That was something that'd haunted Inuyasha wherever he went: his heritage. Even in his human disguise, people still made it apparent that being a half-blood was something unthinkable and just absolutely disgusting. It was something to be ashamed of, and that's one of the reasons why Inuyasha liked how people here thought he was their equal—most of them treated him like one. There were idiots like Spank-My-Ass-'Cause-I'm-Stupid (Bankoutsu) and Buy-Ten-'Cause-I'm-Poor-And-Need-The-Money (Hiten) and also even more morons who thought it was okay to go anywhere near his Kagome, but they just hated him because of him, not his blood.

All right, not something to brag about, Inuyasha thought. But you get his point.

Hold the— Did he just say his Kagome? He merely shoved it aside. Feh, bitch is my mate, anyways, he insisted. Of course she's mine. She's always been mine—wench just hasn't seen it yet.

But still, the thought of Kagome belonging to him, having her to claim as his, made his heart speed up. Stupid emotions. They also made him delirious.

Yo, narrator asshole! Mind not being so fucking annoying?

And it seemed he broke the fourth wall.

Kagome thought instantly, Why do I have the feeling that someone else is breaking the fourth wall, too? She shrugged and went back to thinking what she'd been thinking about, which Inuyasha was still clueless to.

One thought bothered him: Would Kagome ever love him for his self? Yes, he was handsome and they had a connection—they were mates, for fuck's sake—but what if she only loved the human side, like many girls did thus far? What if she didn't like his demon blood, and left him because of it? He didn't think he could stand more people leaving and mistreating him because of that—there'd always be some people, sure, but he didn't want important people, ones he liked, to do that to him ever again. He stared at the cynical, moody, impulsive yet predictable, slightly insane beauty who was staring off into space, and felt his usually fierce, mistrusting eyes soften some. Kagome… Would you, could you, ever love a half-breed like me?

Meanwhile, Kagome had other thoughts. I wonder if they have easy buttons in Let's Imagine I'm Having Fun Land…

—~*~—~*~—~*~—

(Kagome POV)

I have to say, when I first got in trouble here, it felt like the world was ending. But now, as I skip Naraku's homeroom with Inuyasha and Kouga—who's probably avoiding Ayame, who's probably came across as a jealous stalker—I'm actually happy to break the rules. Honestly, I don't want to return to the room where I embarrassed myself repeatedly by having random outbursts, sitting alone (and then next to the Ice King, which isn't any better, mind you), and then puking my guts and emotions out all because a new students walked into class and my teacher's creepiness was too much for my pathetic miko self.

What, would you want to go back? I didn't think so.

I'm quite content sitting cross-legged on our couch in my grease-covered shorts, watching some finally good television. Horror thriller and mystery shows? Please and thank you—I guess. I don't know, because I'm not a big fan if it gets so good that I get scared; I like it when they either suck total yeah or it's at least good enough to keep my interest. I'm not sure what it's called—Carp's Isle, or something like that—but I'm liking all of the suspense and relationships going on that eventually dissolve because of all the murders.

Though I could deal without the tears forming in my eyes because people are dying. Gah.

"This is getting good," Kouga says from the other side of Inuyasha, who'd shoved Kouga over when he saw that he was sitting close to me. Not that I mind my knee resting on Inuyasha's thigh, though. And no, that was not a confession of love, you dimwits. He's, ugh, I can't believe I'm about to say this, but he's good-looking and I like it when we have physical contact. Okay? So I was wrong about him not being hot or me hating to touch him. Sue me. No!—please don't. Really; I'm completely broke except for the pennies placed randomly in my old bedroom. So don't sue me, I beg of you to not sue me.

Anyways, Kouga says something that nearly sends me into hysterics:

"I'll go make us some popcorn."

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" I scream, shaking my head furiously, remembering the burning, pokey feeling the sinister kernels gave my retinas. "IT'S EVIL! POPCORN'S OUT TO GET ME! IT'S GONNA TAKE OVER THE WORLD!"

I guess you can say Inuyasha and Kouga are just slightly concerned by this reaction. Kouga offers awkwardly, "Uh… Candy then?"

Suddenly cheerful, I pipe, "Candy sounds good."

"Great to know you approve," he mutters before he exits the room to go to the café's vending machines. Why people don't get in trouble for skipping class—homeroom, more like it—is beyond me. Inuyasha and Kouga said no one would freak out and report us to my dad, even if they worked here. Apparently, people just don't care.

I thought schools were supposed to care, but I guess I was—sob—wrong.

Inuyasha looks at me curiously when the door's shut, and I try to ignore him, though I can't help noticing how he seems to be inching closer to me and staring at where my knee rests on his thigh. Eyes still on where our skin connects—and not to mention my exposed legs—he asks, "What's wrong with popcorn?"

"AGHHHHH! THE BUTTER-DRENCHED HORROR!"

Calm down, Kagome.

Okay. I breathe in, I breathe out. I feel much better now. Thank you, SC.

I'm not speaking to you anymore.

Whatever. Inuyasha's giving me a confused expression. Wow. He's so dense. Like, Homo-dense. "I'd rather not relive that day in the movie theater," I mumble unintelligibly, but he somehow hears my very low voice. How can he have such great hearing? IT'S INHUMAN!

Inuyasha just shakes his head, smirking in amusement. Honestly, I don't think it's all that funny that my greatest fear is popcorn. Yes, to me, it's perfectly reasonable, but outsiders… Well, I think it's pretty obvious how many calls the police will get about a madwoman rampaging through the streets, determined to break down all popcorn stands.

But that's just the general public. I'm sure I'm not all that strange to these guys, right?

Oh, who am I kidding? Yes, these guys are weird, but they're going to acknowledge me even more because I'm ONE OF THEM. Gah. Talk about a massive downer.

Turns out the series is Harper's Island. Psh, "Carp's Isle"—what was I thinking? Kouga comes back with the candy in record time, so that proves that he truly is quick (if gym wasn't a good enough example). He hands Inuyasha chocolate, which, for some reason, he frowns at. I hear him faintly mutter, "I don't wanna test that theory," which makes Kouga roll his eyes in frustration as he whips out some Peeps.

PEEPS? I LUB PEEPS!

Wait, did I just say "lub"?

Crap.

I chug down a few of my fellow Nerds—haha, clever of me, right?—before snatching the Peeps and growling at him. Kouga and Inuyasha, to say the least, find this downright entertaining, and exchange glances, as if they're sharing an inside joke. I grimace.

I don't like not knowing things. I like being a part of the know.

"What's so funny?" I demand, and they instantly straighten up, giving me small nothing's before smirking again. It kind of ticks me off, but I don't push it.

"Kags," Inuyasha coos, and I scowl deeply at him. "Give me the Peeps."

"NEVER!" I shout, ripping open the bag and watching the yellow chickens fly. NOOOOOOOO! I want to scream, not the Peeps!

I feel a tear coming on, no joke.

But there's better times for that. Right now, I must obtain all the Peeps before Inuyasha steals them back. FORTHWARD!

I scramble around the room, stuffing Peeps into my mouth and—dare I say it?—clothing. Inuyasha's quick though, and has gathered quite the large amount of Peeps. I charge at him, knocking him off-balance, but not making him fall. It's enough to grab the Peeps he was after and had dropped, though.

He just gives up after a while. I think it must've been awkward for Kouga to just watch us run around, because he sighs with relief when we both plop back onto the couch. Just when one of the annoying characters falls through a pit, gets drenched in gasoline, and lit on fire, too.

Greatest death scene ever.

But it breaks my heart to see her dog on the edge of the hole, barking like crazy. I feel some anger built up inside of me—no animal should have to see that!—but surprisingly, Inuyasha's the one to burst. "I can't believe they're making the fucking dog suffer!" he snaps.

"No mutt goes without their owner, huh, Inuyasha?" Kouga murmurs casually. But from the slug Inuyasha gives in the shoulder, I'm guessing dogs are a sensitive topic for Inuyasha.

"You like dogs, don't you?" I ask, truly curious of it all. He must love dogs. I mean, why else would Inuyasha be called "mutt", overreact over anything involving canines, and act like one as well? There's no other possible explanation, unless he's a dog in disguise.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Isn't that a hoot?

Inuyasha blinks for a moment. "Yeah," he finally says slowly as the opening scene for the third episode comes on. "I guess you could say that."

Well. I'm not gonna question that essay he's oh-so-graciously written for me. I stare down at the Peeps in my hands, wondering what he meant, when Harper's Island comes back on and I begin shoving the food down my throat at all the drama going on.

Unfortunately, not even a minute into it, Inuyasha sees the time and we realize we have slayer practice in fifteen minutes. We're just lucky we noticed, or else we would've been sucked back into the TV. After I clean up a bit, not changing because Inuyasha and Kouga said all new kids should just wear whatever until they find what they're good at, we leave. I do notice on our way out, however, that Hiraikoutsu has magically disappeared.

Remind me to never, ever put Sango on my hit list again.

The gym is chaos; people are rushing in and out of locker rooms, wearing stuff ranging from miko attire to what looks like ninja suits. Sango is wearing a black and pink ninja suit, and waves at me before hoisting Hiraikoutsu over her back and running to go see that man from the pictures, her father, the vice principal of this school. Funny; I just saw my dad when we walked in and we both glowered at each other.

Don't you just love my family?

Inuyasha and Kouga run off, so I just scan the area until I recognize someone I actually get along with somewhat. I see Kikyou in miko attire, talking to Yura, who's wearing revealing clothes, and other girls who look like they just popped out of another universe, or Feudal Japan. I see Jakoutsu wearing a girly kimono, talking to Suikoutsu, who's apparently all dressed-up, and Ginkoutsu, who's carrying a lot of weaponry (that he isn't already made out of). Bankoutsu walks up to them in a cool white outfit, his little posse—Kyoukoutsu and Renkoutsu—trailing behind him, and Hiten's wearing tight armor alongside the fat guy he always hangs out with. Ayame exits the locker-room in apparel similar to Kouga's when he comes out; armor and fur. Sesshoumaru enters the gymnasium wearing a regal outfit, and Rin follows behind him in a bright, eye-catching kimono. Miroku comes in as well, wearing his old Buddhist monk uniform as he walks over to talk to who must be in his mentor in orange. Besides that, I can't find anyone else, but then—

Kami.

I never knew red hunting garb could be so, um, unattractive. Not attractive. No, yes, I mean attractive, but it's not attractive on Inuyasha, even though Inuyasha's attractive himself, yet the clothing and he—

Okay, he's attractive with the outfit on. Gods, lay off.

He's carrying that stupid sword with him, the one he hadn't even taken off in Auto-Mechanics, and he's, of course, barefoot. And is it just me, or when he walks, he kind of looks like warrior emerging from a bloody battlefield? Or a hero from an anime show or manga?

I guess I'll never know, because an old woman approaches me that moment, catching my attention. She's wearing miko attire and has an eye patch that I wonder about. But she smiles and asks, "Ye be new, aren't ye?"

I suppose so, Madame Let's Talk Like We're in Medieval Times. "Uh, yeah," I say.

She nods. "I am Lady Kaede, sensei to miko here at Higurashi Taijiya Institute. I sense a spiritual aura from ye, and wish to give ye a shot to prove ye self worthy of holding ye bow."

Can you talk normal? Please?

"Now, here is ye bow and arrow," she tells me, and I resist the strongest urge to slap myself in confusion. Even worse—all the girl miko are gathering around us. Obviously, they want to see me get embarrassed, or want to hear what Lady Kaede has to say. "I want ye to aim at ye target right there." She points to a simple colored canvas down the room, and I feel my stomach tighten when I recognize it as a bow and arrow target.

I've never been good with bows. Jii-chan has to use them often for shrine stuff, and needs a young girl to aim them, and we've always had to hire a classmate of mine to do it. Because I just suck when it comes to these things. My aim stinks majorly, and I become a nervous wreck when under pressure.

No pressure, though.

SC! Didn't you say you weren't talking to me?

Sango's still crazy.

Point taken.

I draw up the bow, feeling some sweat already form from my stress. Gods, I hope I can do this without royally screwing-up.

"What a whore, wearing that outfit," I hear a familiar voice say. My anger skyrockets as Kikyou mutters some more, "Bet you she's a weak miko." Obviously, Kikyou has not trained herself well. If she did, then she could actually know whether or not I was strong. But, you know sluts… They never learn. Even worse? She and her friends begin to laugh as if they're so cool, no one else matters.

Which really peeves me off.

I release the bowstring, and I know I miss when my finger slips. But it still goes a great distance—and straight into the wall. I don't think it'll pierce stone, though, so—

Holy crap, I just noticed the immense spiritual power coming off that thing. Oh, gods, please don't let it—

With a pink trail behind it, the arrow crashes into the wall, sticking for a moment before it shines brightly, making the area around it glow. I feel my eyes widen, and I'm pretty sure everyone else's does, too. Then, as if really made of butterflies, the wall turns into a pink dust and drifts off into the wind.

And I mean, THE WHOLE FREAKING WALL.

Well. That's one way to get grounded.

As sunshine pours in and Kikyou's laughter dies, I can't help but feel more than proud of myself for shutting that female dog up. Shows her what spiritual power really is, even though I didn't think it was normal for miko to blow down an entire wall with their skills. But, even though I'll probably get in trouble for this…

HA. Suck it, Kinky-Hoe.

A/N: Another fandom cliche this purduepup advises you to watch for: Americanizing Japan. Harper's Island, as sad as this makes me, never aired in Japan, so how the fuck could Kagome, Inuyasha, and Kouga know of its existence? That's for you to question and think about next time you consider making one of our favorite characters watch Jeopardy! or Jersey Shore. (Especially the latter, since it's scarring future generations. I mean, Snooki? No thank you. DX)

Remember: review and all that good stuff!