Dan and Blair Go Back to School. On All Hallow's Eve.
Double Double Toil and Trouble…
Dan strode briskly through Washington Square Park on an overcast, fall afternoon, snacking on an apple he'd saved for the short trek home. He tightened his scarf around his neck snugly as he headed in the direction of the subway, shivering as a gust of wind blasted him from behind.
He'd just been subjected to the most excruciatingly long seminar in the history of seminars at NYU; yes he was a wildly successful published author now, but he was still whittling away towards his degree.
One Joyce Carol Oates lecture at a time.
But tonight, on All Hallow's Eve, he was going to be taking a well deserved respite from reading and writing and thinking and analyzing. Tonight would be a cozy, quiet Halloween in Williamsburg. With Blair. Their first together as a couple. Doling out Kit Kats and flipping between "It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown" and "Psycho." And of course, "Rosemary's Baby."
And if all went according to Dan's plan, it would be followed by a little you know what. Because "Rosemary's Baby" always riled Blair up. In the best way possible… That Rosemary was fucking infuriating.
Dan suddenly felt his phone buzzing in his pocket. He smiled as he answered, knowing that it could only be…
"Blair—"
"Where are you, Humphrey?" Blair snipped impatiently before Dan could even get a proper greeting out.
"Well, I just got out of—"
"No time for chit chat. I need you at the penthouse. Stat. Dorota will have your costume steamed and starched and wrinkle free upon your arrival. And all further instructions."
A confused Dan furrowed his brow and careened to a halt. "Wait what? Costume? Blair, I thought the plan was to keep it low key in 'the Burg' tonight. I was going to make my famous 'spooky worm spaghetti and eyeballs,'" he reminded her with a chuckle, amusing only himself.
"Well the plan has changed," Blair said. "So adapt. Now, I have to go. Chuck needs my help. As usual." She let out an exaggerated sigh and hung up.
Dan blinked at his phone, not so smoothly digesting what he'd just heard. Chuck? She was with Chuck?
…
Blair had a devilish twinkle in her eye. She teased a piece of candy corn over the tip of her tongue.
Then began to chew. Slowly. Methodically. Savoring…
She sat primly behind Headmistress Queller's desk. In an old school uniform. Crisp white blouse. Blue bowtie. Headband. Her long loose curls lay perfectly on her shoulders. She smirked, knowing she'd left Dan speechless.
The intended effect.
And the plan was to keep him speechless throughout the evening…
She suddenly popped up from the chair, smoothed out her blue plaid skirt, and helped herself to a few more pieces of candy from Queller's Baccarat crystal bowl. She then slowly sauntered out the door, leaving only the echoing clack of her Miu Mius behind.
This was going to be a Halloween Dan Humphrey would never forget.
…
Meanwhile, Dan felt a ripple of jealousy pulsing through his veins. Blair was with Chuck. Why the hell was Blair with Satan?
And then he remembered.
Tonight was the annual "Haunted Nights" fundraiser for Constance/St. Jude's. Chuck was chairing the event this year. And it looked like he'd enlisted Blair's help.
Of course he had, Dan thought, rolling his eyes and shaking his head. Any opportunity to get close to her. And of course Blair couldn't say no to a charity event for her alma mater.
Dan stared at the glossy red apple in his hand, a single bite missing. Then with a look of firm resolve, shot it one handed into a nearby garbage can. It was starting to mist, and he ran his fingers through his damp curls before darting down the steps and disappearing into the Eighth Street station.
A jovial Dorota flitted into the foyer in her "Lady Mary" Downton Abbey frock, pulling up her long white gloves before artfully arranging a platter of custom wrapped Patrick Roger chocolates for the trick or treaters. They were expecting a grand total of four at Chez Waldorf. That's right, only four children actually lived in the building. And two of them for only half the year. Of course her little angels would make six.
She looked up at the sound of the elevator and watched as Dan wandered off, unsure of what was in store for him.
"Hi Dorota," Dan said in a cautious tone. He surveyed her costume, impressed. "Downton Abbey?"
Dorota smiled and nodded proudly. "Vanya is Matthew," she added. "Last episode, season three? Never exist."
Dan chuckled, loosening up a smidge as he inhaled the aromas of lit pumpkin spice and vanilla candles and warm, buttered rum cider. He admired the arrangement of ceramic Jack O'Lanterns and faux fall leaves adorning the entry table.
"Mister Dan, I have costume ready for you in here," Dorota informed him after she placed the last wrapped chocolate on the tray.
Dan trailed behind with bated breath as she guided him into the living room, anxious to see what kind of costume Blair had cooked up for him.
She came to a stop, and gestured at a headless mannequin standing by the chaise. Dan was confused. The mannequin was wearing a yellow dress shirt and a navy blue blazer with a familiar looking insignia. A St. Jude's insignia. And a red and gold striped tie. Dan turned to Dorota quizzically.
"Um. That's not a costume… that's my… that's my St. Jude's—"
"Miss Blair say you must wear. No questions. No talk backing."
Dan scoffed. "Is she serious with this?"
"Mister Dan," Dorota chastised, raising her hands to him. "That is question."
Dan scratched his head, speechless. Not only was Blair making him go back to the school that treated him like a second class citizen (her more than anyone), she was making him do it in the most utterly humiliating fashion possible.
She was completely twisted. And she was going to owe him for this. He would be collecting later. With or without the assistance of Rosemary.
He watched as Dorota ladled up a steaming cup of hot buttered rum cider from a silver punch bowl on the credenza.
"Miss Blair say you arrive at the Haunted Nights at eight sharp. Then you look for the three witches. She also say make sure you drink before you come." She handed the cup to him. Dan looked inside and took a whiff, the strong scent of rum clearing his sinuses. "Whoa!" he exclaimed.
Dan processed Dorota's instructions as he took a sip. "Mmm," he said, pleasantly surprised at the flavor of the cider. The elixir was already seeping into his system. "Mmm," he repeated, even more enthusiastically. This shit was fucking delicious.
"Three witches…" The alcohol was causing him to think out loud now. "Obviously that means three minions." Great. More humiliation to look forward to. He shook his head and smiled as he welcomed another sip.
"Oh, Mister Dan! Before I forget." Dorota scurried to retrieve a brown paper lunch bag from the credenza and handed it to him. "Miss Blair say it make costume 'more authentic.'"
Dan frowned and reluctantly took the bag from her. He already knew what it was, but he peeked inside just to confirm: Yep. A tuna fish sandwich in a plastic baggy.
Blair. She never forgot a detail.
"Have fun!" Dorota exclaimed before rushing back into the foyer.
"How could I not?" Dan muttered sarcastically as he sighed at the mannequin. He glanced inside his now empty mug, shrugged his shoulders, then walked over and refilled his rum cider. "This stuff's the shit."
Darkness enveloped the city. It continued to mist as a now sozzled Dan pondered the blurry, communal steps of the Constance Billard School for girls and St. Jude's School for boys.
They were steps he'd taken a thousand times. But the weights he would normally have on his feet had been replaced by an overwhelming confidence. Thanks, no doubt, to the lazy river of rum he now had circulating through his veins.
Familiar faces shuffled past him, donned in everything from Avengers to Game of Thrones garb.
They snickered and snorted at his ensemble as they passed.
"Yeah, you wish you'd thought of it!" Dan blurted boldly, raising his tuna fish sandwich to the sky proudly.
The sounds of a female fronted rock band emanated from inside, out into the chilly night air. Dan began to bob his head to the beat.
Father did you miss me?
I've been locked up a while.
I got caught for what I did but took it all in style.
Laid to rest all my confessions I gave way back when.
Now I'm versed in so much worse,
So I am back again.
Dan felt his phone buzz and checked an incoming text. It was Blair of course. "Where are you?" He could practically hear the impatience… it was coming up on eight-thirty now. Yes, he was very late. Three mugs of rum cider could really slow a guy down.
Dan took a deep breath, then continued onward and upward, into those hallowed halls…
And he said
For the lines that I take, I'm going to hell!
For the love that I make, I'm going to hell!
He stopped at the entrance of the dark, packed Constance auditorium. It was decked out with smoky caldrons and cobwebs and purple curtains and intricately carved Jack O'Lanterns. Orange laser beams knifed through the dirty dancing crowd of alums, tipsy on Triple X martinis and blue Wonderlust cocktails.
He tossed the tuna sandwich in the garbage and strutted inside.
Dan paused and looked around, on the prowl for the three witches. He chuckled as he caught sight of a blitzed up Nate. He was dressed as a life guard in only red swim trunks, and he had a pair of Oakley's propped on his head. He held a buoy in his hand and was blowing his whistle, pointing and "cautioning" all of the scantily costumed ladies in the crowd.
Dan continued to scan. And suddenly… buzzkill. He made accidental eye contact with a scowling Serena. She had come as a super slutty Little Mermaid, complete with skin tight bustier, red flowing wig, and long strands of pearls. Dan watched as she suddenly shot back her black hued Triple X, licked her lips, and grabbed an innocent-but elated-bystander dressed as Jon Snow. She planted a deep, wet kiss on his mouth, making sure to maintain eye contact with Dan the whole time.
Gettin' heavy with the devil, you can hear the wedding bells.
Dan rolled his eyes and journeyed onward, unfazed but teetering a bit from the strobing lights and the alcohol, on his quest to find the three witches. On stage, the metal band was going hard. And it was only now that Dan noticed the lead singer. She was blurry… but now he could see that she bore an uncanny resemblance… to his sister. "Jesus…" Dan squinted and cocked his head in astonishment at the raccoon eyed, wild haired blonde who was rocking out and headbanging with the lead guitarist.
Please forgive me father,
I didn't mean to bother you.
The devil's in me father.
He's inside of everything I do.
"You really are a masochist, aren't you, Humphrey?"
Dan smiled. He would know that snide, judgmental whispervoice anywhere. He slowly turned to see Chuck Bass sizing him up. He was wearing a suit and bowtie, as usual, and holding a Scotch. His costume was merely a dagger with dripping "blood" coming out of his head. Too bad it wasn't real, Dan thought. Without thinking, he ran his index finger through the thick, bloody sludge on Chuck's head. "Raspberry?" he questioned, taking a sniff. "Oh yeah, that's raspberry. I prefer cherry. Or strawberry."
Chuck's nostrils flared, unamused. "There's a minimum fifty-thousand dollar donation to even be in this room, Humphrey. So pay up. Or I'm going to have to ask you to leave."
Dan chuckled. He may not have had Bass amounts of money, but he could easily swing that if he needed to. If he wanted to. But he didn't. So he wouldn't. He patted Chuck on the shoulder. "I don't plan on staying long, Chuckles. Just need to find three bitch… er 'witches,' so I can find Blair and get the hell out of here."
Chuck's jaw tightened. "I don't know what you're going on about, Humphrey. But Blair's not here. And I think it's time for you to go."
"Uh… nice try, Chuck. But apparently you can't fund a runraiser…" Dan slurred. "Excuse me, run a fundraiser, or even go to the bathroom by yourself without Blair's assistance. So…" He rubbed his hands together and began to scan the crowd again. "Three witches… where are you?"
Chuck stared at him, lip snarling, fists clenching.
For the life that I take, I'm going to hell!
For the laws that I break, I'm going to hell!
"I'll be back with security. To escort you out," Chuck mumble-whispered smugly, before turning into the crowd.
"Yeah, you just do that," Dan called after him. He spasmed as he felt a firm hand on his shoulder.
"There you are!" Kati said.
"Where have you been?" Iz added, completely put out.
"We've only been looking for you everywhere," a disinterested Penelope added, arms crossed.
"Well hey there 'Witches,'" Dan quipped, still bobbing his head to the beat.
Three edgy witches in black knee high lace-up boots and long, violaceous Oscar de le Renta capes. Their lips were painted in varying degrees of mauve, and their eyes were lined in midnight black.
"Yes," Penelope announced snidely. "We all borrowed your sister's eyeliner."
Kati proceeded to pull a note card from her cape pocket and began to read:
Double, double toil and trouble;
Fire burn and caldron bubble.
Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the caldron boil and bake;
Dan watched, completely entertained, as Kati then passed the card to Iz:
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg and howlet's wing
Iz passed the card to Penelope, who heaved a sigh:
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.
Dan nodded his head, impressed. So Blair was going all in with the Macbeth theme. Cool. He could get on board with that. He loved him some Macbeth. Didn't really explain his attire, however…
Penelope then reached into her cape pocket. She pulled out a tube of blood red lip gloss and tossed it at Dan, who caught it, despite his delayed reactionary state. "Your clue to where to find Blair," she said, with no enthusiasm whatsoever.
And with that, Kati, Iz, and Penelope disappeared into the crowd. Their work here was done.
Dan stared blankly at the lip gloss. This? A clue? He looked down at his attire. And then it hit him. That little minx... "The lavatory..." he said with an intrigued smile.
He glanced over at Chuck, who was now leading two brawny security goons in his direction. Dan suddenly ducked down behind a dancing "Bar of Soap," then beelined for the side door. He didn't even notice a pair of wounded aquamarine eyes under a red wig documenting his movements…
The girls hall was dark and desolate, but Dan strode confidently, the rum still doing its job. He peered back over his shoulder every so often, just to make sure he hadn't been followed. He was almost bursting with excitement.
For the love that I hate, I'm going to hell!
For the lies that I make, I'm going to hell!
He was picking up the melody now, humming along.
For the way I condescend and never lend a hand.
My arrogance is making this head buried in the sand.
For the souls I forsake, I'm going to hell!
Seconds later, he was standing in front of the girls lavatory. Dan furrowed his brow as he opened the door and peeked inside. It was dark. Empty. No movement detected. He closed the door and looked back down the hall, unsure now. Maybe he had misinterpreted the clue?
And then, the door slowly opened behind him…
"BOO!"
Dan jolted as Blair yanked him inside.
Gettin' married to the devil, you can hear the wedding bells.
She flipped on the light and surveyed Dan in his St. Jude's duds. "Took you long enough." She then got a whiff of Dan's breath. "And now I know why… Jeez. How much cider did you have, Humphrey?"
Dan grinned at Blair's attire. "Hey, we match!"
With a face of stone, she placed a hand on her hip, giving him a Waldorf once over. "No. We don't. You look like a Muppet."
Blair slinging insults at him. It was just like old times.
"So… the whole Macbeth, minion, three witches thing… You're not going to 'de-pacitate' me are you?" he asked, still slurring his words.
"Decapitate?" Blair corrected. "No, that comes later."
Dan fidgeted with excitement, wondering what was coming now.
Blair spied her lip gloss in his hand. She walked over and propped her leg up on the bench, and began to run her blood red nails along her blue satin tights. She pulled them up seductively.
And just like that, Dan was in a time warp. He gulped as he watched, captivated, an erection coming on fast and hard.
"So did Ms. Carr ever give you those notes?" she asked innocently, fluttering her lashes at him as she hiked her skirt up just a tad, revealing a little more thigh.
Dan was speechless. He'd never told Blair, but he'd had more than a few lucid fantasies about their little confrontation in this bathroom back in high school. He'd always suspected some sadistic foreplay on her part.
He was getting confirmation now.
She trailed her fingertips over her tights again, making sure Dan registered every movement. She then smoothed her skirt back into place and sauntered over to him, her heels clacking seductively on the linoleum. She eased the blood red cherry lip gloss from his hand, her fingers glancing his balmy palm.
He was practically drooling as she proceeded to drown her already plump, crimson lips with gloss.
"Well?" she asked again. "Did you?"
There was no way in hell Dan was answering that question.
Blair smirked. "You do remember the last time we were here, don't you?"
Oh did he ever...
She methodically returned the brush back into the tube, pushing it in slowly. "You accosted me. Oh so rudely." She ran her nails down Dan's lapels, then veered southward…
…all the way down…
…to the throbbing bulge in his pants. She grabbed him firmly. And Dan let out a pained grunt.
"The Gossip Girl blasts weren't exactly lies, now were they Humphrey?"
Dan shook his head, speechless.
Blair smiled sweetly now as she massaged him over his pants. "But I want to make amends anyway," she cooed, slowly unbuckling his belt and unzipping his pants. "Because let's face it. I wasn't exactly nice to you in high school was I?"
Hey there, Father
I don't wanna bother you...
Dan's cock was throbbing in agony as her warm lips came within a whisper of his. She slowly pulled his blazer down off his shoulders. "Was I?" she repeated more firmly. Dan gulped and shook his head no, and she suddenly shoved him back against the cold brick. "I'll make it up to you…" she purred in his ear. "Right… now." She planted a kiss on his lips, slathering him in crimson as she untied her bowtie and slowly unbuttoned her blouse.
But I've got a sin to confess
I'm just sixteen if you know what I mean
Do you mind if I take off my dress?
She bit his lip voraciously, drawing a hint of blood before finally pulling her mouth away and tossing her blouse to the floor. Dan licked his lips, tasting blood and cherry lip gloss. He watched as she went to her knees.
All I need is someone to save me
Cause I am goin' down
Blair ripped Dan's belt off and threw it aside carelessly before yanking down his pants and boxers. She then went in for the kill, grabbing his rock hard cock and licking his shaft aggressively from back to front, front to back. "Mmmm," she moaned.
And what I need is someone to save me
Cause I am goin' down, all the way down
Dan's head tilted back against the wall. The incredible combination of her cool, dainty fingers and blazing hot tongue was robbing him of his senses. "Fuck…" he whispered, staring down at her again, enjoying this six-year old fantasy come to life. She slowed it down and sucked gently on his tip now, gazing up at him with big doe eyes, stroking him with torturously her nails.
"Good?" she wondered aloud as she swallowed some pre-cum. Dan nodded down at her, breathless.
Blair smiled demonically. And then… suddenly pushed his cock between her creamy, heaving breasts.
"Oh FUCK," he grunted at the unexpected and un-fucking believable sensation.
"Better?" Blair asked coyly, still blinking up at him. Dan couldn't speak now as he took over, drilling his cock between her tits over and over. "Mmm," she praised, pushing them together tightly for him. One of Blair's bra straps fell off her shoulder at the force of Dan's thrusts.
She grabbed his shaft again and took him in her mouth once more, slowly, not stopping until she had his entire length in her mouth. Dan's body was in a clench as he felt his tip hit the back of Blair's throat. "Oh my GOD! FUCK!" he bellowed.
Her fingers inched up under his shirt now, clawing at his abs. "Mmm," she cried, suddenly releasing him. She wiped her mouth and gave his balls a caress, catching her breath before diving in again. She took him in halfway this time, gazing up with sultry doe eyes. She began to blow him at a slow, torturous pace.
"Yeah, Blair…" he praised, rocking into her mouth to the beat of the music.
Well, hey there, Father
There is just one other thing
I have a simple request
I hear you know God could you give him a nod in my direction
I would be in your debt
She released him yet again, then blinked up at him innocently. She played with a loose curl. "Am I forgiven yet, Humphrey?" she whimpered, wiping her mouth daintily.
Dan stared at her, breathless. And suddenly yanked her to her feet. "Not even close."
She let out an excited squeal as he flipped her body around and pressed her hands into the sink. Blair moaned as he reached under her skirt and roughly shoved her tights and panties down. She smirked at him in the mirror, his lips covered in crimson and blood. Her legs were trembling, and she steadied herself on the vanity, watching as he recklessly discarded his blazer and tie.
"Unghhh," she moaned again as he roughly pulled her hips back and pushed her forward by the neck. He ran his hand gently over her hair, then pulled up her skirt and lined up at her entrance...
Her smooth, perfect derriere beckoned him… Blair whined and bit her lip, bracing herself as he teased her with his hard tip, then slapped her ass with his cock. "Yeah… Oh God," she mewed, her pussy getting wetter and wetter with each slap, her knees growing weaker. "Please, Humphrey…"
She cried out in ecstasy as he finally submerged himself inside of her. "Oh YES!"
Perhaps there is something that we could work out
I noticed your breathing is starting to change
Blair urged him on as he pounded his cock inside of her. Over and over. "Harder," Blair begged, pressing her hips back against him with every thrust. "Punish me…"
Dan went harder, and Blair's moist hands began to lose their grip on the sink. "Be still..." he warned.
We could go in the back behind all these stacks of bibles
And get out of this cage
She couldn't comply, her legs unable to support her. He pulled out suddenly, much to Blair's displeasure. "Humphrey—" He grabbed Blair's headband and tossed it on the tile, then collected her wild locks in his hands, fisting it roughly. He yanked her back against him. "Be still while I'm fucking you, Blair," he whispered against her neck, giving it a rough bite. Blair let out a yelp, then nodded submissively, enjoying the sight of her flushed face in the mirror.
There was this boy who tore my heart in two
I had to lay him eight feet underground
Dan sucked on her neck for a few more seconds, then suddenly shoved her back down over the sink. He teased her again. "Oh God, Humphrey… Fuck me." He plunged into her and Blair moaned as he began to once again pound her into the vanity. Her breasts were violently bobbing out of her white lace bra now. "Yeah..." she mewed.
All I need is someone to save me
Cause I am goin' down
And what I need is someone to save me
Cause God, I'm goin' down, all the way down
Dan grunted into her strawberry scented hair, his arms suffocating her, attempting to still her as she wiggled and writhed in agony underneath him. "Be still, Blair," he warned again. "I'm trying…" she whined back in response, her breath hitching, eyes closing shut at the pleasure. Dan's cock felt so good inside of her, and he was filling her so completely.
His grip on her tightened.
And just as he felt Blair at the brink, he pulled out…
"No, GOD DAMMIT, Humphrey!"
"You told me to punish you—"
"Humphrey, please—"
…and SLAMMED inside her again. "Oh GOD!" Blair screamed raspily, seizing up in Dan's arms as his cum poured inside her. She smiled, then watched, mesmerized, as it dripped down between her thighs, down into her panties and tights. "Yeah," she rasped, completely and utterly sated. Dan gnawed on her neck again and continued to grind against her, holding her by the elbows and making sure she got every last drop from him before giving her slick, milky bottom a slap. And eliciting one last jolt.
They stared at each other in the mirror, breathless. Sweaty. Exhausted.
The mist had turned to rain outside, and the drops were pelting the window.
"Cross another one off the old bucket list," Dan finally joked, coming out of "character" as he ran his fingers through her hair and released her. "Can't believe we just did that. Here. On Halloween. Definitely beats spooky spaghetti and—"
"Quiet, Humphrey," Blair ordered sternly, addressing him in the mirror. Still obviously in character. She turned on her heel, glistening with sweat and shoved him away rudely. He stumbled backwards.
He watched as she then yanked up her bra, not even bothering to "freshen" herself up before pulling up her panties and tights. Dan watched as she recovered her lip gloss and blouse and headband from the tile.
"I'm sure by now you're aware that there was a donation requirement to attend this event that you seemed to have bypassed, Humphrey," she informed him as she buttoned her blouse. "Therefore, your presence is requested in Headmistress Queller's office. You can pay there."
Dan's mouth fell in confusion. Shit. Was she serious? It's not like he had his checkbook handy. She picked up his tie and flung it at him, then licked her lips. She gave his currently lifeless cock a caress before cutting the lights and breezing out the door.
Leaving him standing in the dark.
With his pants and boxers still down around his ankles.
But he had his answer.
Can't trust a cold blooded woman
Boy, don't you lie in her bed
Dan pulled up his pants and put himself back together, a hint of a smile developing on his lips, giddy with anticipation at what else Blair could possibly have in store for him. He glanced down.
His cock seemed to already be following suit.
You can't trust a cold blooded woman
She'll love you and leave you for dead…
He eagerly opened the door, but quickly closed it back at the sound of Chuck consulting with his security detail at the end of the hall. Dan thought a moment, then cracked the door, quietly eavesdropping…
"Serena said she saw him come this way," he heard Chuck mumblewhisper.
Dan rolled his eyes and closed the door back. He gave it another moment. Until he finally heard the frantic clap of three idiots' shoes racing down the hall.
He finally meandered out of the lavatory, threw his blazer over his shoulder, and whistled his way down the hall.
Destination: Headmistress Queller's office.
You can't trust a cold blooded lover
You can't trust a cold blooded slave
You can't trust a cold blooded other
In the end they'll just drive you insane
Dan stood just outside the door of Headmistress Queller's office. He was having serious flashbacks. The last time he was here "Call Me Serena-gate" only person he'd ever told about it was Nate. So it was safe to say Blair knew about it, too.
He placed his hand on the doorknob, took a deep breath, and braced himself for round two.
He entered…
There's one thing you must understand
You can't trust a cold blooded
Can't trust a cold blooded
Can't trust a cold blooded…
…and froze in his tracks. It was dark, save for the eerie glow of shrouded moonlight. And one lit, tapered candle in Blair's hand. She was sitting on the edge of Queller's cherry wood desk. Staring straight ahead. Wearing a thin, white nightgown. Dan could now see she was covered in "blood." It was smeared on her face. Her hands. Her gown.
Her dark hair was wild and mussed.
Eyes were deranged. Black. Demented.
"Out, damned spot. Out, I say…" she began.
Yes, she was channeling her inner Lady Macbeth.
And Dan was instantly hard.
"The thane of Fife had a wife… where is she now?" she continued, looking down at her hands. "What, will these hands ne'er be clean?"
Sleep No More. It was happening. Before Dan's very eyes.
"No more o'that. My lord, no more o' that…"
Just when Dan thought he couldn't be anymore turned on, she slid off the desk, and began to "sleepwalk" towards him…
Dan gulped, and let his blazer drop to the floor, intoxicated. He blindly shoved the door closed…
"Here's the smell of the blood still, all the perfumes of Arabia will not sweeten this little hand…" She twisted the edge of her nightgown, hiking it up. She came to a stop right in front of him, and blew out the candle, letting the smoke linger in Dan's face. "What's done cannot be undone." Dan's breath hitched. "To bed, to bed, to—" Before she could get the last word out, Dan was on her, his hands gripping her waist, pushing her back in the direction of the desk.
Blair dropped the candle on the floor as Dan propped her on the edge. Their eyes locked for a steamy beat. He caressed her face, then began to slowly divest himself of his shirt, watching as her legs began to part for him, teasing him with a glimpse of her wet pussy. Her fingers slowly slid beneath her gown. "Oh," she cried, her legs trembling, head tipping back as she made contact with her clit.
There was a flash of lightning, followed by a rumble of thunder.
Dan was out of his boxers now, just in time to see a devilish glint in Blair's eye. He smirked back at her, intrigued by her. Intrigued by the danger of it all.
Because this… this truly was madness.
Dan began to recite Macbeth's final words: "And thou opposed, being of no woman born, yet I will try the last. Before my body I throw my warlike shield. Lay on, Macduff, and damned be him that first cries, 'Hold, enough."
Blair bit her lip, completely aroused, hips thrusting off the desk as she continued to pleasure herself.
And with that, Dan plunged inside her again. Her bare legs wrapped around his waist, holding on for dear life. She gasped for air as he thrusted relentlessly, her bloody nails digging into his bare, sweaty back. "MMM!"
The band had apparently taken a break, and the only sounds now were gasps and moans and the slap of raw, sweaty skin on skin echoing off of Queller's hardwood floors.
Dan grunted and rocked into Blair with abandon. Over and over. Until suddenly, Queller's desk began to creak, a fragile leg the culprit. Before it completely gave way, Dan moved Blair off the desk and brought her to one of the chairs, sitting her down on top of him. He frantically pulled off her nightgown and tossed it aside as Blair arranged herself on top of Dan's cock.
She began to ride him, her hips moving in a circle. Agonizingly slowly. She teased her breasts then leaned in, shoving them in Dan's face… He soon felt the sensation of Blair's teeth on his neck, her hands pulling roughly on his hair.
Payback. She was simultaneously sucking his soul and marking her territory.
The "blood" and sweat from Blair and Dan's bodies was now dripping, and saturating Queller's antique chair.
"Fuck…" Dan groaned as she continued to ride him. His hands were on Blair's hips, nails digging in as she rode him harder. Dan took a nipple in his teeth.
"Humphrey…" she cried at the unexpected sensation, her head tilting back as a flash of lightning illuminated their bodies. Seconds later she came hard, crashing against him. "YES! MMM! MMM! YES!" She then pulled herself off his cock, just in time to direct Dan's cum all over her glistening tits and tummy. "Yeah..." she said, rubbing his cum all over her.
"Oh fuck," Dan grunted, completely enjoying this completely filthy and extremely naughty Lady Macbeth side of Blair.
They sat in silence now, out of breath, a sticky, sweaty, disgusting tangled mess.
Not so unlike the real Macbeth and Lady Macbeth.
"You're fucking amazing… That was incredible," Dan praised, still trying to catch his breath. He was still wrapping his head around the bathroom encounter. And now this.
"Yeah," Blair smiled in self-satisfied agreement.
"So what is this exactly?" he pondered, leaning in to lick some gooey, red "blood" from her breasts. "Ah, cherry… "
Blair let out a giggle.
They were still too exhausted to move… that is until the sound of footsteps in the hall suddenly interrupted their reverie. They looked at one another, now recognizing a pair of familiar voices.
"I promise you, Chuck. He went down the girls' hall," Serena said argumentatively.
"Then where the hell is he!?" Chuck shot back, as if it were a matter of life and death.
Those crazy siblings.
Dan's eyes grew wide as their voices drew nearer, and Blair let out a loud snort. He punished her with a bite on her neck, eliciting a loud cry.
"Wait, did you hear that?" Chuck's voice questioned.
"Yeah…" they heard Serena reply. "Sounded like it came from Queller's office."
Before Blair could laugh, Dan spied the crystal bowl of candy corn. He quickly grabbed a handful, shoved it in a surprised Blair's mouth, then collided his lips with hers…
"Slutty mermaid" Serena and "Daggerhead" Chuck were now peering curiously through the small window into Queller's office. It was pitch black. They looked at each other, and Chuck slowly placed his hand on the knob. There was a rumble of thunder as he slowly pushed the door open…
Serena flipped on the light…
….and let out a blood curdling scream.
They stood frozen in horror at the scene.
There lay a recently lit candle… Queller's desk was collapsing, and in a state of complete disarray. The crystal Baccarat bowl was toppled, candy corn everywhere; papers and pens were scattered.
But that wasn't the frightening part. There were excessive amounts of "blood" smeared on the desk and all over Queller's chairs.
And on the floor, Dan's "bloody" shirt was balled up next to Blair's "bloody" nightgown.
Serena and Chuck looked at each other. And got the hell out of there.
Now hunched behind the desk, Dan and Blair chuckled.
"Shall we…?" Dan said.
"We shall…" Blair trilled.
At the entrance of the Constance auditorium, Chuck was on his cell phone, pacing as he franticly placed a call. Serena stood beside him, freaking out.
They both looked up in shock…
Blair and Dan were walking towards them, Blair in her "blood" stained Lady Macbeth nightgown, Dan now in a "headless" Macbeth costume Blair had custom made for him. It actually looked as if Blair was holding Dan's decapitated head. Both of their necks were covered in purple hickeys.
Serena and Chuck stared at them, mouths agape, finally putting two and two together. Blair suddenly planted a wet, sloppy kiss on Dan's lips.
Father did you miss me?
I've been locked up a while.
I got caught for what I did but took it all in style.
Laid to rest all my confessions I gave way back when.
Now I'm versed in so much worse,
So I am back again.
"Trick or treat," Dan said with a sly wink. Blair smiled knowingly as they waltzed in and joined the festivities.
Urgh, I wanted to get this out last week and then of course had to rush to get it out today because that's just how I am. Hopefully there aren't too many typos :p Taylor Momsen and Pretty Reckless songs seem like they were meant for this holiday so I used a few songs from them:
Going To Hell, Goin' Down, and Cold Blooded
Thanks for reading and I hope you all enjoyed! :D Have a fun and safe Halloween everyone!
-E