SasoDei- Sekkus Skato – Chapter 10

Simple and Clean

(Warning- Swearing, Sexual references and the TOTAL demolishing of the fourth wall X3 and by demolishing I mean pulverising X3. You have been warned!!)

Deidara sat down in the cafeteria, wincing a little at the pain in his ass. Konan looked up at him from her laptop. She smirked at him evilly.

"So, Dei, I heard that Sakura kissed you, you bad mouthed her, she ran off, and then you and Sasori went to the back room, and then had sex with him…Then had coffee."

Deidara blinked at her.

"And you know this how, un?"

"AkatsukiMemberWoolfy posted up chapter 9 of Sekkus Skato a few minutes ago."

"Who?"

"AkatsukiMemberWoolfy. She is this weird 15 year old blonde girl who is absolutely obsessed with Sasori and SasoDei. She lives in Western Australia and is fairly popular amongst the Otakus of the internet. Why don't you read some of her stories? You star in all of them!! And die in several as well!! (of course, not permanently)"

Deidara grabbed the laptop from Konan and read over chapter 9 of Sekkus Skato quickly.

"WHAT THE HELL, UN!?! DOES THIS GIRL HAVE CAMERAS ALL AROUND THE SCHOOL!?! And in my mother's car?"

"SHE KNOWS EVERYTHING!!! And she better hurry up and write chapter 10."

"One sec, I used to work as a computer hacker…My mum put a lot of adultery bans on my internet which I had to get around."

Deidara started typing randomly. After a bit a Microsoft Word page came up.

"HEY!! She's typing right now, un!!! …And she is typing exactly what I just did…WHAT THE HELL, UN!?! AND EVEN NOW WHILE I'M SPEAKING THE WORDS ARE COMING UP ON THE SCR- (the world suddenly paused. Then the author came back from washing the dogs.) EEN, UN!!! …"

"Whatever happened to the fourth wall?"

Deidara chucked the laptop into a random bin and blew it up.

"DAMN YOU INTERNET!!"

"Hey!! My laptop!!"

Suddenly a brand knew Toshiba laptop appeared in front of Konan.

"Praise the author!!!"

Deidara sighed.

"Getting back to the plot, yeah, Sasori just screwed me…several times, un…"

"Really? AkatsukiMemberWoolfy only wrote one smut scene!! Awwww."

"THAT'S IT!!! I'M CALLING A REPAIR MAN TO FIX THE FOURTH WALL!!!"

"Hey wait…How many smut scenes could fit into 2 hours?"

"You'd be surprised, un…You'd. Be. Surprised…SOMEONE FIX THAT GOD DAMN WALL ALREADY!!"

*A guy named Steve came along randomly and repaired the fourth wall*

"So, now that that is taken care of, what do you wanna do?"

"You mean after dinner, un?"

Konan rolled her eyes.

"Obviously."

"We can play Kingdom Hearts, un!!"

"Hey!!! Good idea!!"

-

The starting theme song of Kingdom Hearts 1 came on, Simple and Clean by Utada Hikaru.

"I love the openings of Kingdom Hearts, un."

"Yeah. So anyway Dei, what are you going to do?"

"About what, un?"

"Sasori and Gaara!!"

Deidara's eyes widened. Gaara!?! HE'D FORGOTTEN ALL ABOUT HIM!!!

"FUCK, UN!!! WHAT DO I DO!?! Wait…How did you-"

"Internet."

"…Keeping the fourth wall intact, thank you very much. What am I supposed to do!?! Both like m- …Wait…"

"What?"

"…I think Gaara likes me…But…Sasori…QUICK!!! WHAT DOES THE INTERNET SAY, UN!?!"

"Sorry, Dei, I can't tell you anything that will affect the plot of the story. That's the rule of breaking the fourth wall."

"Damn…"

"Maybe you should just ask him. That would be the smartest thing to do. I don't know why the characters always go for some lame plan on getting them to reveal their feelings and all that."

"Did you say lame plan on getting them to reveal their feelings, un!?! THAT'S WHAT I SHALL DO!!"

"DEIDARA!!"

"…Fine I will go with your idea…Meanie…"

"Just trying to make the story non cliché."

"You're still a meanie…"

"Can we please carry on with the plot?"

"…Fine…"

They both played Kingdom Hearts, while Steve once more fixed the fourth wall, also putting bars on it so it would hold this time.

-

Sasori was looking out the window, waiting for the bell to go and class to begin. Though he wasn't really focused on the window, he was too busy lost in his day dreams of him and Deidara. He shuddered softly in pleasure at the memories. Oh Deidara was SO getting another detention today!!

"Hey Danna, un."

Sasori blinked and looked away from the window. He gave a cross between a sweet and sinister smile at the blonde.

"Hello Dei-Chan~ How are we today?"

Deidara sat down in the seat next to Sasori's, cringing a little.

"You did a number on my ass, un."

"Sorry bout that…Guess I did go a bit rough."

"It's okay, un, it felt too good for me to be pissed off about it now." Deidara smirked at Sasori, whom smirked back. Deidara's smirk disappeared and he sighed. "What about Gaara, un?"

Sasori quirked an eyebrow, then remembered what Gaara had told him.

"Oh, snap. I forgot all about him and his little fetish for you."

"Yeah, un, so did I till Konan reminded me."

Both lovers gave each other worried expressions. Sasori shook his head softly and pulled something out of his pocket. Deidara quirked an eyebrow as Sasori put the thin frame glasses on. Deidara was reminded how sexy they looked on the red head.

"What was the point of putting your glasses on, un?"

Sasori both smirked and shrugged.

"They make me look smart. Now Brat, we're going to have to work out something with Gaara. He's my cousin; he will hate me when he finds out that I touched his 'Property'."

"Hey, un!! I'm not anyone's property!!"

Sasori's smirk grew and he leaned close to whisper in Deidara's ear.

"That's not true, Dei-Chan. Your ass practically, literally and ultimately belongs to me."

Deidara blushed crimson. Sasori pulled away quickly as the bell sounded and Ms Shizune entered the class room.

"Okay students, today we're going to start looking at William Shakespeare's famous tragic play, Romeo and Juliet."

Sasori's eyes widened.

"Ouch. I sense foreshadowing."

Deidara sighed.

"Why do I even bother repairing the fourth wall if you're just going to break it again, un?"

And so, Steve was fired from his job as a fourth wall fixer and now rules Narnia.

-

Poor Dei XD the Fourth Wall is too easily broken in this fan fic XD

Sozzy bout all tha crack X3 Just remember this fan fic is mainly for humor purposes ^-^"

If any one has really noticed, the characters are slightly based on the characters in Romeo and Juliet X3 Deidara is Juliet, Sasori is Romeo and Gaara is Paris. Even look at the time frame, it's only been a few days since Sasori and Deidara met!!

"Never was there a tale of such woe, than that of Juliet and her Romeo."

I think that was the last line in Romeo and Juliet X3 Something like that, we looked at it last year in English =3

Very tragic play, I like Mercutio X3

"True I speak of dreams, which are the children of my idle brain, and a substance thinner than air."

I think he says that anyway

I memorized that quote cause I was gonna put it as my DA signature, but I like my siggy the way it is X3

Speaking of quotes I also used a quote in their from Blood Drenched Scorpion's review ^-^ That being "Your ass practically, literally and ultimately belongs to me." ^-^ Thanx Blood ^-^

Lolz, anyway, hope you likey X3

Review/Comment!!