I'm so so so sorry guys I haven't wrote for ages but been busy busy busy with coursework! Please review guys! :D Enjoy reading!

I could see Jacob with his charming cheeky smile and his gorgeous dark glittery eyes staring right at me, his rough shaggy long hair & his gorgeous muscular body. I hated knowing that this was just a dream and that Jacob was someplace far away, without me. I could feel my heart about to break & the pain about to shear through out every part of my body but this all remained because his face remained calm cool & I could see the love we had for one and another in his gorgeous deep brown eyes. He touched my cheek his gentle soft warm touch on my skin. I reached my soft hand out to touch his rough stubbly cheek but he pushed it away and jumped up suddenly & began walking away without a single word. Tears were streaming up through my eyes and down my cheeks why was he walking away? Why was he ignoring me? I started screaming and yelling for him to come back but he continued to walk away from me.

I ran, ran into the forest I couldn't loose him not again not after I had just been so happy with him. The rough sharp branches were cutting deeply & wounding my skin badly. The warm crimson blood was dripping down me & the sweat was stinging my gushing wounds but I couldn't give up I had to keep going ever! I ran screaming yelling until my legs ached I was screaming my lung out air wasn't even touching them now. Why wasn't he coming back he had just been smiling at me with love in his gorgeous brown eyes. I continued to scream louder & louder.

I woke up screaming, sweating and crying my eyes out. I felt like my heart couldn't break anymore and that my world was falling apart. I wasn't myself without him I didn't even know who I was anymore, no one did not even Charlie did. But the worst thing was I had managed to hurt every single person that ever cared about me in the last 6 months and all for nothing, for him to just leave me, to take away my only friends just what monster could do that, simple a werewolf! One specifically named Jacob Black!!!

Why, why, just why had I been so blind, so stupid and so reckless but mostly why on earth after all this pain that he had put me through do I still love him like no one else! Why did I want him so badly after all this pain that he had sheared through my body which was now in a fragile state! This was the guy I hated so much but the love I had for him was keeping me from hurting him. My body was falling apart with out him & I knew it, I really did need him to keep me alive.

What was I meant to do without Jacob he wasn't just my boyfriend; well current ex boyfriend now but my best mate, my one true love, my absolute everything that I needed & desired to be alive. And now in just a few words everything was completely gone! With no decent reason no pictures left just the painful memories & a sorrow filled world that reminded me of him.

I couldn't eat couldn't sleep just cry & cry & shake with shearing pain until my body got so tired that eventually it might've been possible for me to fall asleep, but it still didn't leave my mind to rest the thoughts were always torturing always there & they always would be so long as I knew he was living without me.

I was so angry, so upset, so confused about why he left me just for his family, well his "pack". He promised me that he would never ever hurt me, that he would teach me to ride a motorbike without nearly killing myself & that he would never let any harm come to me but now he was gone he broke every single promise he ever made to me!

I cried, and cried and cried until my heart was non-existent, well that was impossible so long as Jacob Black was permeantly tattooed on my heart. With my lungs completely numb & struggling to breathe and my heart completely splintered apart I finally fell asleep on my damp pillow with my future seeming hopelessly alone & these thoughts permeantly torturing me forever until I was back with him.