By the time the light began to bleed into the room, Yuki was dry-eyed. Physically he was aware of the ebbing pain in his feet and legs, the sharp tug at his wrists, the burn in his arms and shoulders, and the tightness in his chest. All this dimmed however, compared to what he felt inside. The hungry emptiness was like a void. It called to him, seductively whispering of an end to pain. That would be such a sweet release.

Akito returned as the sky was changing, beginning to leech the light from Yuki's special room. Yuki watched through blank, impassive eyes. His heart quickened, his body reacting in fear whereas his mind barely felt it. Akito approached, surveying his work clinically through cold narrowed eyes.

"My love. How did you sleep?" The voice came soft and tender, wrapping itself around Yuki in a warm embrace.

He didn't answer. He hadn't slept. How could he?

When the light had made it possible to see that morning he had chanced a look at his feet. What he saw made his stomach churn. At first all he could process was the vibrant, raw red. Steeling himself with a deep breath he looked closer. He saw the ominous white blotches amongst the cracked, dry red. A vast blister wrapped itself round one foot, caressing his heel and continuing to the sole of his foot where he lost sight of it. A trail of blackened, cracked skin laced its way up one leg, almost to his knee. It was repugnant, but oddly fascinating. Examining the different ways his body had responded was darkly intriguing to him.

Akito showed no emotion as he gazed at the burns. He swivelled his head to look pensively up at Yuki whose face hung several feet above his.

"Mmm, Yuki? My pet?" he prompted.

Yuki squirmed. An answer was required. But what to say? A cold knife seemed to scrape along his spine. Be careful. After a moment he settled on the truth.

"I- I didn't sleep. Master." His voice was cracked. He hadn't used it since screaming himself hoarse the night before. He flinched slightly at the memory.

Akito smiled indulgently. "Oh but sleep is very important my love. We wouldn't want you to ruin your beautiful looks. And you do look oh so beautiful, my pet" he sighed longingly, and his eyes lingered on Yuki's crotch for an uncomfortably long time. Yuki blushed. He was immensely thankful Akito had allowed him his boxers.

"Well let's see, perhaps we could do away with these."

Yuki's heart faltered. He thought he was about to lose the last of his dignity until he noticed Akito was indicating the cuffs on his ankles. As he stepped closer Yuki's heart juddered back into a rapid pace. He shifted away slightly and felt the painful tug as his handcuffs shifted. Akito smoothly removed a key from his pocket and reached out to Yuki's feet. As soon as his light fingers made contact, Yuki drew in a sharp hiss of breath. Akito undid one cuff. The pain was extraordinary. It was as though his bubbled, raw skin had melded to the cuffs. He felt an intense pull as Akito gently eased the cuff away from the mangled skin. A wave of nausea washed over him. His head swam and he tried desperately to take deep, steadying breaths. Akito paused, that familiar wickedly sweet smile just tugging at the corners of his mouth.

"You know Yuki, you really did let me down. Everything I did was for you. And you- you..." he seemed to be struggling. He ran his fingers distractedly through his hair. "You ruined it."

Akito began to work on the other cuff. Yuki flinched away. This was more painful. He was too scared to look at his foot, to see what was happening. Akito inserted the small key, and as the cuff pulled on his skin Yuki felt bile rising in his throat.

"But, that will not happen again. You're mine. I'm God, and you're the rat. And we belong together." He paused, and his hands stilled. Yuki concentrated on his breathing.

"Never again" Akito snarled.

He fiercely ripped the manacle from Yuki's foot. The cuff tore the surrounding skin off too. The force burst one of the blisters open, expelling a considerable volume of pale pus. The jagged edges around the strip of missing skin cracked and split, leaking blood and pus onto the newly exposed red raw skin. Akito smiled at the effect.

Yuki was aware of none of this. As soon as the manacle was wrenched away the nausea swelled in a great wave and despite his best efforts he was sick. He could do nothing as the vomit coursed down his front. A lot of it soaked into his t-shirt but some splashed to the floor. Akito took a step back, his expression disgusted and furious. Yuki felt utterly pathetic and helpless as it trickled down his chin. He tried to wipe his chin on the shoulder of his t-shirt but his efforts yielded little.

Akito now seemed bemused rather than angry. He watched Yuki struggle and seemed satisfied. "Hmm." He dropped the bloody manacles with a clang, and left without a word.

Yuki shuddered. The pain in his feet was fierce, especially the right one. The smell of vomit was overwhelming. His hand twitched subconsciously, desperate to get the vomit off his face and away from his nose. There was nothing he could do. He watched the blood slowly blossom where the manacles had torn his skin away. He breathed deeply. He was utterly miserable and helpless.

Akito did not return until the next day. He brought food with him, the first Yuki had seen since arriving. Once more he had been unable to sleep. He hadn't since the night before Kyo's true form had been revealed, and the loss of three night's sleep weighed down on him. He no longer noticed or cared about the smell of vomit, or the way it had dried and crusted on his face, t-shirt and legs. He saw Akito returning so often during his long hours of sleepless nightmares that when he entered, Yuki wasn't sure if it was real. He set the food down, but Yuki's blurry eyes and muddled brain could not decipher it. He blinked and suddenly Akito was on the box in front of him.

"My dear" he murmured, as he cupped Yuki's jaw. "Shall we have some lunch?"

At length, Yuki managed to nod, not trusting himself to speak. He rested his feet cautiously on the box, recoiling as he applied pressure to the vast blister on his sole. Akito undid one handcuff and the sudden change in balance caused Yuki to stagger. As he stumbled his entire weight yanked sharply on the wrist still restrained. When Akito freed this wrist he couldn't support himself and fell to his knees. He was weak and exhausted, and trembling.

Gently, Akito raised him and guided him down, supporting under his arms. Yuki found himself on the floor beside him. His limbs felt wooden and unusable. His legs shook even when he was sitting and his arms were heavy and leaden. His wrists sported circles of dark bruising. Surrounding this were the merged yellow and browns of older bruises in the process of healing. His wrists were chaffed, and in his befuddled state he could just make out the smears of blood.

When Akito invited him to help himself to food, he found his arm was too weak and shaky to reach for the water. Akito helped him, tenderly easing the water into his parched mouth. Yuki felt pathetic and was forcibly reminded of his childhood. But the water was so good, and so needed. Neither spoke during the meal, though Akito hummed almost constantly.

When they were finished Akito guided Yuki back to the wall. Yuki had regained some energy now and struggled slightly, his whole being willing Akito not to cuff him again. But he did. He effortlessly subdued Yuki with a few gentle slaps and restrained him. He put the manacles on his wrists and Yuki might have cried if he'd had the energy. Akito left the box beneath him, so Yuki could rest his feet on it, carefully avoiding applying weight to the painful blister. It took some of the strain off his wrists, for which he was immensely grateful.

When Akito returned that night Yuki did not dare ask about returning to Shigure's house. It was Sunday and he had school the next day but Akito seemed in no way inclined to release him. He bit back his question and remained silent.

"It is time to begin your training" Akito whispered, but Yuki did not hear him.

When the night was at its darkest, Akito returned. Yuki was drifting in and out of consciousness, his body desperately craving sleep. He struggled to focus on Akito, who climbed onto the box and gazed at Yuki's bleary eyes. He began whispering in his ear.

"You are vile. Unlovable. Pathetic and weak. A disgusting abomination. A monster. A freak..." The stream of hissed insults stirred something deep within Yuki's memory, and he felt the abandoned little boy again.

Akito continued relentlessly, the same stream repeatedly. Yuki had heard it all before. He had survived it all before. He tried desperately to build his wall up, plastering over the cracks, determined not to let anything through to him.

"You are vile. Unlovable. Pathetic and weak. A disgusting abomination. A monster. A freak..."

Hours passed and the words were washing up against the wall, wearing away the material. Akito had sunk to the floor some time ago; standing for so long had tired him. Still the insults came.

Eventually he lapsed into silence. The silence screamed at Yuki. With surprise he realised he was shaking. Akito rose slowly.

"You are undeserving of love. Kyo and Tohru do not love you. How could they? Just remember Yuki, you are here because of them. Because of Kyo," he slapped Yuki's face to the right, "and Tohru" he slapped it back to the left.

Akito walked away, leaving Yuki with stinging cheeks. As he left he whispered.

"You are vile. Unlovable. Pathetic and weak. A disgusting abomination. A monster. A freak..."

Yuki struggled; he tried to plug the holes. The words could not reach him. Akito was playing a game. It wasn't true. But... the venom in his words was so convincing.

The days dragged by, scraping against Yuki's soul as they passed. Life was painful. And difficult. Each day Akito came to the room four times. As Yuki was bleakly watching the light swell on the floor, Akito would arrive with water for him. When the light was at its brightest, and the room at its warmest he would return. This time all he brought was cruel words. For several hours he would whisper in Yuki's ear.

"You are vile. Unlovable. Pathetic and weak. A disgusting abomination. A monster. A freak..."

Sometimes he interrupted himself to slap Yuki if he seemed unfocused.

As the light began to creep away again, Akito would return with bread and water. He humiliatingly broke the bread and pressed it into Yuki's mouth, and Yuki would struggle to chew and swallow.

During the night, when barely anything could be seen, Akito returned once more. Again he would whisper poison in Yuki's ear.

"You should blame Kyo and Tohru you know. This is their fault. You know they don't love you..."

Yuki struggled through the thick haze surrounding his thoughts. His head sagged forward; he was no longer able to support it. He tried to fight the words, to ignore the taunts which came day after day, night after night. But he was so tired, and fighting was so much effort.

On the seventh day Akito let him down. Yuki fell ungracefully to the floor. He couldn't move. He tumbled gratefully into unconsciousness.

He didn't know how long he slept, only that it was dark when he awoke. He struggled to raise his head. After sleeping his thoughts were clearer than they had been in days. He saw the dried blood bracelets which encircled his wrists. With some effort he reached for his face and felt the dried vomit flaking off as he rubbed his chin. He realised with a jolt that he had peed himself, though he couldn't say when it had happened. It could have been while he slept, it could have been days ago; everything was a blur to him. He flushed in shame.

He was so weak. He felt so small. So unimportant and insignificant.

That night when Akito began to whisper in his ear Yuki found that the wall had crumbled away. The words were finding their way to his soul and he couldn't stop them. He curled up, pressing his hands tightly against his ears.

"You are vile. Unlovable. Pathetic and weak. A disgusting abomination. A monster. A freak..."

The words prowled in his mind, finding all his weak points and easing their way in. He realised after a time that he was screaming. He didn't remember starting.

Akito shouted the words now, over and over and over.

Hours later some part of him became aware that Akito had left. His scream faltered and died.

The words continued as though Akito was right there at his ear.

"You are vile. Unlovable. Pathetic and weak. A disgusting abomination. A monster. A freak..."

He remained curled up all night, hands still pressed tightly against his ears, trying to keep out the words that were already within.

He didn't know how many days passed. Now he was no longer bound by the manacles he could retire to his special corner, and he could sleep. He tried to walk on his burnt, mangled feet but the pain made him stagger and baulk. Another blister burst and emitted a foul smell.

The sleeping helped him focus, even of it was only several hours a day. It didn't help defend him. Still Akito came four times a day. Yuki knew the routine. He dreaded the routine. Sometimes Akito would say Kyo or Tohru's names in a constant blurred stream, slapping and kicking Yuki the whole time. In time Yuki began to flinch away at the mention of Kyo or Tohru, fearing what was coming.

He didn't speak. He didn't cry. He didn't fight back.

"You are vile. Unlovable. Pathetic and weak. A disgusting abomination. A monster. A freak..."

Yuki began to believe Akito. He accepted what he said, internalised it as the truth.

As his feet, legs and wrists painstakingly healed, his soul began to break.

After just over two weeks Yuki was a shell of his former self. Both physically and mentally he was weaker. He saw and heard Akito almost constantly, even in his sleep. The only thing worse than hearing the cruel words was knowing they were true. Yuki cowered in his corner most days. He squeezed his eyes shut against the light, choosing to live almost exclusively in the dark. When Akito entered something within him would scream. He curled his hands tightly around his head, desperate not to hear, sometimes drawing blood as he dug his fingers into his skin. It only took several minutes of Akito whispering now to begin Yuki screaming.

"You are vile. Unlovable. Pathetic and weak. A disgusting abomination. A monster. A freak..."

He knew this. He knew it! Why did Akito need to remind him? He knew what he was. He disgusted himself and everyone else.

On the seventeenth day something snapped and his scream broke.

"I KNOW!" he exploded. "I know..." the sob came pitiful and desperate. "I know what I am... I-I'm sorry! I'm sorry..."

Akito gazed at the broken boy crumpled on the floor before him. And smiled. Gently he knelt down.

"What are you Yuki?" he whispered.

"I am vile. Unlovable. Pathetic and weak. A disgusting abomination. A monster. A freak..." Yuki recited back, and the conviction in his voice was audible.

"Yes, you are." Akito allowed, his voice calm and emotionless. Yuki shuddered.

"But," Akito reached tenderly down and raised Yuki's chin, "I love you Yuki."

Yuki's eyes shone. He gazed up at Akito in confusion. How could he mean that? Yuki curled into a ball once more, not believing. No-one loved him. Akito certainly didn't love him. He was unlovable.

"Maybe I am a weak God, to feel so for such a creature. But, it is true. I love you Yuki."

He left, but his words remained with Yuki. They nestled themselves deep in his mind. It wasn't true he thought. But, some part of him wanted so desperately for it to be so.

Was this the rope? Would he be able to climb from the darkness on this weak tendril of hope?

And did he deserve to?

That night, he didn't scream himself to sleep.

The next day Akito didn't bring cruel words, only assurances of his love. The slaps were replaced by gentle touches. Yuki was baffled and nervous. Akito confirmed that Yuki was a freak, but that he loved him regardless. Yuki flinched away when he came close, not trusting him. He was anxious and suspicious.

Vaguely, Yuki noted that school would have ended for summer. He wondered about Kyo and Tohru, and Shigure but he could feel the stinging pain of a hundred slaps when he thought of them, so he stopped soon.

As the days passed, Yuki began relaxing. Akito came with soup as well as bread now and it tasted truly delicious to Yuki. Akito would sit with him on the floor. Sometimes hours would pass in silence. Sometimes Akito would talk.

"You are so beautiful Yuki. I am the only one who can see that."

"I miss when we used to play together. I miss when you loved me in return. I love you more than you deserve, and I deserve your love back."

On the morning when he reached for Yuki's hand and Yuki didn't flinch, but let him take it, Akito smiled.

"I think perhaps it is time to clean you up, my love."

Yuki was confused as Akito rose and gently pulled him to the door. He staggered, unused to walking, and still tender on his burnt feet.

They entered Akito's bedroom and Yuki blinked in the sudden bright garish light.

"Go for a shower my love," Akito instructed.

Gingerly Yuki slid the door and stepped into the cool privacy of the bathroom. Everything was as it had been. He stripped off his vomit, sweat and urine-stained t-shirt and boxers and stepped gratefully into the shower. The water was phenomenal. He hadn't realised how greasy and disgusting his hair and body had become but cleaning himself now felt so good.

His feet and legs stung sharply. It seemed one of his feet was numb, he couldn't seem to feel anything in it which concerned him slightly. The other burns grew increasingly painful in the water, and after a time he found it too painful to stand so he sank down to the floor. Scrubbing himself clean was almost therapeutic.

Eventually he forced himself to switch the water off. He stood dripping, and examined his body. It seemed the wounds on his back were healing. Honestly he had almost forgotten them in recent weeks. His legs and feet were gruesome and disturbing to look upon. His wrists seemed alright; the smears of blood had washed off, leaving a fine band of red around each wrist and a larger band of bruising. As he deeply inhaled the steam he realised he had lost a considerable amount of weight. His ribs poked through his bruised chest and his collar bone stood proud. It saddened him. For a second he indulged the thought that Tohru would want to feed him up when he returned. Then he remembered of course that she didn't care about him and he was a freak unworthy of affection. It hurt.

As he left the shower he found to his shock Akito sitting on a counter awaiting him. He fumbled nervously for a towel whilst the older boy smiled hungrily at him.

"My love," he murmured, drifting over to Yuki, "I trust you have not forgotten what you are?"

Yuki shook his head hurriedly.

"I am vile. Unlovable. Pathetic and weak. A disgusting abomination. A monster. A freak..."

"Yes, but...?" Akito raised a delicate eyebrow. Yuki swallowed.

"But you love me?" he stuttered.

"I do, my love." Akito embraced him tenderly.

Yuki felt a warmth, a strange comfort. He understood he was a freak, But... maybe Akito did love him..?

To be loved... it was nice, safe.

Yuki raised his eyes. He smiled at Akito, and though it confused him it felt genuine. Akito smiled softly in return.

Several days later when Hatori arrived, he found Yuki huddled in a corner of Akito's bedroom. He had tried to see Yuki every few days for the past three weeks but Akito had not allowed it. He had begged to examine Yuki but Akito got that cold look in his eyes and Hatori didn't want to anger him in case he made things worse for Yuki. Now finally, Akito had admitted him.

What he now saw scared him. Yuki's forehead was pressed against the wall and he seemed to be having a conversation with someone Hatori couldn't see. He mumbled and paused, nodding his head sometimes before continuing. One had clawed constantly and relentlessly at the other wrist. The skin there was raw and inflamed and small blossoms of blood bloomed along the tracks Yuki made. Akito had left and Hatori wondered if he was ashamed of what he had done to Yuki.

He approached quietly, then cleared his throat and announced his presence. Yuki spun, his eyes wide and wild. His cheeks were hollow. Deep dark shadows lurked under his twitching eyes. He seemed to relax slightly when he registered who it was but he kept clawing at his wrist.

He wouldn't leave the corner when Hatori tried to coax him out so he had to settle for examining him there. The burns were concerning, they were more serious than Akito had implied. He took notes and photographs, hoping later research could enable him to find the best solution for Yuki. In the meantime he applied ointment which caused the boy to twitch. He was angry at Akito for doing this to Yuki. Angry and sad. Hatori felt a great stab of guilt and remorse at his powerlessness in the face of Akito. Hatori noted that Yuki was malnourished and had lost weight rapidly. He gently examined his wrists and saw that both were cut and bruised but neither were infected or greatly worrying.

What concerned him more was Yuki's mental wellbeing. It was hard to remain detached and professional when he saw Yuki like this. As he was examining his burnt feet Yuki turned once more to the wall and continued his conversation. What Hatori heard concerned him deeply.

"Yuki?" he began gently, "Perhaps you could talk to me a little? Why don't you tell me what you're doing?" No reply came and Hatori sighed.

"Why are you scratching your wrist?" Silence, but for Yuki's continued mutterings to the wall.

"Who are you talking to Yuki?" Nothing. In frustration Hatori grabbed Yuki's wrist and stilled its vicious clawing. Yuki spun suddenly.

For a second the clouds parted and Hatori could see the Yuki he knew again.

"I'm a freak Hatori,"came the mutter. "I know. I am...unlovable." Hatori didn't want to interrupt when Yuki was beginning to open up but inside he was screaming denials at the boy.

"Akito he... he says he loves me." Hatori saw Yuki frown slightly in confusion.

"But... I don't understand. If he loves me, why did he do this to me?" It was asked with such open honesty and confusion. Yuki turned. He slowly raised his t-shirt and Hatori saw a deep gash across his chest.

Yuki frowned down at it, looking desperately confused.

"Is this love?" he whispered, tracing his fingers lightly over the cut.

Hatori's heart broke. The boy gazed openly up at him, pure innocence written over his face. He didn't know what to say. He could see the young boy who asked Hatori why his mother had left him, the child who had asked why his brother had turned his back on him, why he couldn't have friends. He had never had a good enough answer for him. He still didn't.

Akito re-entering the room spared him having to answer. Just like that the Yuki he knew disappeared behind the clouds once more. He began to scratch at his wrist again.

Under Akito's careful eye Hatori cleaned the gash and applied anti-bacterial cream. He checked Yuki's back which was almost healed. With a groan he stood and walked away from the boy he could never adequately help. Akito smiled at him.

"This is for his feet," he handed Akito the burn ointment. "This is for his wrists. I'll need to get something for that gash." He glared grudgingly at Akito. "Make sure he takes these," he instructed as he handed Akito two packets of painkillers and one packet of anti-inflammatory tablets.

"Oh I will." Akito cooed.

"Don't tell anyone!" The sudden shout from the corner of the room. Hatori frowned. Yuki hadn't looked up, he was still scratching. Akito too looked momentarily annoyed but his frown quickly smoothed into a smile.

"Well, did you hear that Hatori, hmm? If my Yuki doesn't want you to tell anyone, you had better not."

"Yes, Akito." He walked to the door and paused.

"You know Akito, at this rate you might actually kill Yuki."

Akito did not answer, he merely smiled. In that moment Hatori truly hated their God. He left with a heavy heart.

Yuki rocked himself in the corner, clawing at his wrist until Akito went to him and wrapped him in an embrace, upon which he immediately stilled.

"I love you Yuki," he murmured in his ear. Yuki made a small noise in return, a weak grateful whimper.

Several nights later Akito woke to find Yuki wide-eyed, rocking himself at the end of the bed. His breathing was ragged and he shook. He alternated between clawing frantically at his wrist and clutching his head desperately in his hands. Akito smiled.

"Yuki my love, come to me." He extended his arms welcomingly, smiling warmly. Yuki flinched then crawled quickly to him. The shaking boy pressed himself closely, gratefully, to Akito's body. Akito wrapped his arms around him.

"Sshhh. It's alright my pet. I'm here and I love you."

Yuki gradually stilled, clutching tightly to Akito as he drifted to sleep.

Oh no Hatori, I'm not going to kill Yuki.

I'm going to destroy him.

Disclaimer: I still don't own Fruits Basket.

Also I'm pretty tired so not 100% sure what I've just written, I've probably just been sleepily rambling...

Please let me know what you think :)