"Ok - catch you later then." I said and continued screwing the lid of a jam jar on and put it on a shelf. I sat down on my stool and waited...

A Far Cry Of Hope

Chapter 10: Get A Grip!

Edward POV

When I walked out of the bakery, I felt the urge to turn round and scoop Bella up in my arms. I have no idea why that instint came over me but I felt that it was a good thing to do. But then I remembered that her daughter was there and she seemed quite a clever six year old. She was a beautiful child, no doubt about that. She had deep chocolate brown eyes, just like her stunning mother. And what a mother she was. Calming her child down and knowing exactly what to say. That's the kind of woman who I wished to marry and have children with. Sigh.

I grabbed a taxi, about a block away from the bakery. I got him to drive me home so I could change. Lauren would be wondering where I was. She didn't live with me...yet. Something I'd been planning to arrange but from the events of meeting that amazing woman, the plan felt foolish. Lauren is your girlfriend! I yelled at myself. Someone to get over Izzy! Which was ridculas in many views. I wasn't really using Lauren as much as I was when I first started dating her. I'd met her the day after Izzy had fled from the hotel after running into her in the lift.

I'd then left to go back home, only to find that my grief for Izzy was depressing me. I phoned the first women I thought of: Lauren Mallory. Lauren didn't know that I was using her in the first place. She thought that she'd made me turn my head and swoon over her 'hotness'. It annoyed me but I've changed, I've matured. I'm not a 'player' anymore. I had grown 'feelings' for Lauren and at first she'd been an 17 year old slut. I'd caught her several times while we dated, with men in bed, men in the shower, men with their legs wrapped round her....

I stopped, why was I looking at Lauren differently just because that one woman DID turn my head and sniff the air hopefully? This was stupid and reckless, I needed to stop. I scooped out my iPod from my jacket's pocket and cursed. It wasn't there. I'd proberly left it on the bedside table on the bakery's guest bedroom. My heart stood up a bit, another chance to see beautiful Bella? TAKE IT! I growled at myself, making the man driving , twich slightly. This was getting out of hand now.

The taxi was driving along Greenway Hill. "You can drop me off here" I grunted, shoving a $20 bill through the mini window. I stormed out and sighed. My life was being recked again. I knew I should of backpaddled when I had the oppurtuinity!! I grabbed my keys out of my pocket and unlocked the stiff door. I was surrounded by mail as I stepped into the hallway. There was hundreds of pink and red envolopes with hearts and kisses on them. At least 30 of them!. I scooped them up and and dropped them onto the dining room table. I grabbed a ramdom one and ripped it open:

Roses are red
Violets are blue
You are so sexy
You know I really want you

Lauren x x x

I sighed and dumped the rest in recycling. What a waste of paper and trees. Lauren had been hinting recently that she wanted to 'do it' with me. What was the fuss? She'd had sex with loads of other guys before and while we were dating. The reason I haven't left her or even so much as hated her, was that I needed her. To heal me. To make me better. Only the attraction of Bella was making Lauren look like a ghost in my eyes. I couldn't get her out of my head.

She'd scream at me sometimes beforehand after I first saw her with Mike Newton - of all blokes and yelled that she had needs and I wasn't fullfilling them. Only now she was hinting that she wanted some sex from me for a change - ditching Mike, Tyler and James for me, her actual boyfriend. Seeing as I'd only had sex once in my entire life and with the woman, I truley will never stop loving - I was hesitant. She just thought I was scared which is laughable to her.

I went into the kitchen, plugging in my phone to charge and calling Lauren on the home phone.

"Hello?" I heard her say.

"Lauren - it's me Edward."

"Heey Eddie - aren't you ready for me yet?" I could hear her pout.

"Urmmm" was my only responce.

"Eddie - a woman needs needs just you guys do. I bet your little man is screaming out for me!"

I looked down, no he wasn't. "Do you want to meet up later?"

She sounded exicted "Yeah! Can I meet you in town, y'know just outside that cute little bakery?"

I gulped but Lauren didn't hear it, "Urm yeah ok."

"Bye sweetie! Seee you later!" and she hung up.

Oh well, Things can only get better - can't they? I went into my bedroom to get ready.