So, I'm sure those of you who read Another 12 Months are thinking, "Wait. That's the name of Spencer and Becky's baby boy." Well, this is the guy I stole that name from.

Just so you know, I don't own the In Death series.

Chapter Nine: Roarke

"Sweet, sweet Friday!" Sam yelled as they walked into school.

"Hopefully we won't get detention again today," Freddie said.

"I don't know why you keep blaming me, Freddie," Sam said with fake innocence.

"Maybe because you're the one who smacked him with a textbook and then flung applesauce at him," Carly told her.

Sam smiled at her friend. "I did no such thing."

Carly laughed and Freddie rolled his eyes.

The bell rang. Sam walked off to Study Hall. Carly held Freddie back.

"You're gonna be finished the list today," she said to him.

"Yeah. So?"

"You told Sam you'd give it back once you finish it."

"I'm very aware of this."

"Well, how are you gonna give it back?"

Freddie shrugged. "Put it in her locker or something."

Carly smacked her forehead in frustration. "Freddie, you're the only one who knows how to break into her locker."

That was true. Freddie has helped her make it almost impossible for people to break into her locker. They had tried many things and failed. They once enlisted Spencer to help. That resulted in Sam's locker setting on fire. Eventually, the set up a series of really sharp pins that would pop out and stab anyone who tried to get into her locker. Also, according to Sam, even if the person kept going after they got stabbed, their DNA would be on the pins that stabbed them. Then they'd be able to capture the culprit with forensics somehow.

"Good point," Freddie eventually said.

"Um. I have an idea."

"What?"

"You could tell her how you feel about her, then give her the list back after. She may be less hard on you if you do that."

"Or she'll kill me either way."

"Nah."

"Carly, I'll figure out a way." He walked away.

Carly knew he wouldn't figure something out. She texted Wendy and Gibby so they could put a plan into place.

Sam was in a good mood. And not just because it was Friday. She had been having a pretty good week. She had bonded with Anti-Edward, which was something she didn't would happen when she first got a note from him. Then there was Freddie. They had had detention together twice that week. And they actually had a lot of fun. They wrote threatening notes to each other, and would giggle while reading them. Obviously, they were constantly yelled at. That just led to more giggling. It was some good times. She wondered how long it would last. She liked the fun times with Freddie more than the bonding with Anti-Edward.

She decided to just enjoy it all while it lasted.

in between classes, Sam had been a little excited about the next note from Anti-Edward. That made Freddie really happy. He loved being on Sam's mind, even if it was his alter-ego.

He opened the notebook while in Study Hall, and read number two.

Number 2: Roarke from the In Death series

Mmmm. Yet another Irish man makes the list. Roarke is such a sexy beast. I am SO jealous of Eve-the main character of the series-for being his wife and getting to do the nasty with him.

So, you think Edward is all madly in love with Bella? Well, Roarke is much more in love with Eve. He still keeps the little button that fell off the ugly suit she was wearing they day they met in his pocket. All the time. Every day. It's so sweet. Also, he never gave up on getting Eve. She didn't want to get involved with him at first, so he basically bribed her by giving her real coffee-the series takes place in the future and they only have, like, soy coffee crap-to win her affections. Finally, Roarke gave up pretty much all of his criminal ways because of Eve-she's a cop. What has Edward given up for Bella? Nothing. That jackass.

Roarke is also uber rich. His home is like a freakin' palace. Right in the middle of New York City. The grounds there are HUGE. There's an epic garden where he and Eve got married. Hell, their friends Louise and Charles married each other there too. The house is surrounded by a wall. How epic is that? Oh. The house also has a shit ton of rooms. Eve believes she probably hasn't seen even half of them. There's even an indoor pool. Well, it's like a huge pool room with the pool, a hot tub, and a lot of space to hang out in. Eve's friends have had fun little parties there where they basically have a spa day. The house Edward lives in is definitely not as cool as Roarke's.

OK. Let's talk about the one illegal thing he still does. He has this whole computer system that isn't registered. That way he can do all this stuff without the man finding out about. He can get files that Eve can't even get as a cop. That's so hot.

You really need to read the In Death series, Carly. It makes you laugh, cry, feel the suspense when they're about to catch a killer, and turns you on. Roarke and Eve have some awesome sex scenes.

Wow, Freddie thought, Sam REALLY liked Irish guys. He decided that he needed to go to Ireland one day to see what was so special about them.

"I wonder what Anti-Edward will say about guy number two," Sam said to Carly as they walked to their lockers.

"Who is it?"

"You'll see." They reached their lockers, and Sam handed Carly number two.

"Hey, ladies," Freddie said as he leaned against Sam's locker.

"How goes it, Fredlumps."

"God, you really like Irish guys," Carly said to Sam when she finished reading.

"Well, they are crazy hot," Sam told her.

"When you come over tomorrow, bring the first book of the series over."

"You wanna read the steamy sex scenes, don't you?"

"Maybe."

Sam laughed. It was funny whenever Carly admitted to her perviness.

"Enough about sex," Freddie said. "Just read Anti-Edward's note."

Sam squinted at him and said, "Fine, Mr. Bossy Pants."

Sam,

What is it with you an Irish guys? They don't seem all that special to me. They're just guys from another country with a different accent. I don't find any accents on girls really sexy. It's just, well, the girl that's sexy. Who cares about an accent? Girls are so weird.

I noticed that the guys on your list keep getting nerdier. Well, according to you, they're hot nerds, but still nerds. I never thought of you to be the type of girl who'd be into nerds. Not that I have any problems with that. All girls should be into nerds. We are the greatest after all. You should spread the word. We'd all be interested in getting a girlfriend.

So yeah. That's all I got to say. Can't wait to read number one.

Anti-Edward

"Seriously, Freddork, you need to meet this guy."

Freddie chuckled. "I guess so."

"He seemed kind of jealous," Carly pointed out while giving Freddie a look.

Sam shrugged. "It's flattering, I guess." The bell rang. "Let's go to class, Fredicin."

"Actually, I have to talk to him real quick," Carly said. "Alone."

"OK..." Sam headed to class. She was really miffed that Carly and Freddie kept having super private conversations without her.

"What is it?" Freddie asked.

"You're telling Sam how you feel about her. Tonight."

"WHAT?!"

"You heard me. You'll be doing it at six o'clock."

"On iCarly?!"

"No. You and Sam will join the show after you tell her. I have a plan for the show while you guys are talking."

"What plan?"

"You'll find out." She began to walk away, but stopped and turned to face him. "If you don't meet with her, I'll kill you," she said then finally left.

By the look in her eyes, Freddie knew she wasn't joking.

Oh snap. Only one chapter and the epilogue left! I know you'll all like Mr. Number One. Some of you have guessed it already, so go you people!

I'll try to get the next chapter up as soon as possible. Promise. :D