It had been a week since Sirius death and Tonks had just returned from accompanying Harry, with some of the order members, back to King Station. She had managed to put away the loneliness away for the mean time. Tonks needed to go to Grimmuald place to collect a few things she had left behind. She walked into the familiar corridor and stumbled on the bloody umbrella stand. "Gosh, you would think someone would have placed you in a safer place," She muttered angrily as she went to her things. As she came down the stair she took a final look around. The couch in which Sirius would usually be lounging on looked lonely and out of place. The place just felt less like a home without her cousin to entertain and make her laugh. She slowly walked to the couch and sat on it. Tonks couldn't help but think about Sirius. If she hadn't been hit by the spell that Bellatrix had fired at her than maybe Sirius wouldn't be dead.

Dead, Tonks sobbed at the word. Just thinking about it made her feel so guilty and lonely. She was so involved in her sadness that she didn't even notice that someone was in the room.

*** Lupin was in his room when he heard a loud crash, for one moment he thought it was Sirius throwing something at the house elf, but then realized that Sirius was gone. He felt a depressing feeling in his heart. Sirius died and I'm the only one left, he thought. First James and now Sirius, we're they all to face the same fate?]

He then heard a voice follow the crash. It must be Kreacher, but he was sure the voice sounded like woman's. Remus got up and walked quietly down the stairs and found Tonks on the couch. She wasn't crying but he noticed that her shoulders were shaking as if trying hard not to cry.

"I'm so sorry," She whispered so softly that he barely heard her. At first he though she had spoken to him but then Tonks said, "I should have stopped her...why…why didn't I," but she then started sobbing.

"Nymphadora," Remus said softly as he went to her side. Tonks looked up and then rubbed her eyes.

"don't call me that, Remus," She mumbled. She wouldn't look him in the eye but looked at her shoes.

" Tonks, it's not your fault," Remus told her. He knew that she was feeling guilty. Her whole aura was a mixture of grief and guilt.

" I-I keep hearing it but I can't," She said fresh tears falling down. "I still can't believe it. I just can't. It's my fault, all my fault!"

Remus gathered her into his arms; he couldn't bear to see her like this. He could handle his own pain but not hers.

"Please don't cry, Tonks." Remus said as Tonks buried her face in his jumper, her whole body shaking.

"I have no one," Tonks whispered. "He was the only one that I loved apart from my mum and dad."

Remus stiffened slightly and though he didn't want to he asked, "Did-did you love him that way?"

"What way?" Tonks looked up her face stained with tears. Then a look of comprehension passed through her face. "No, not the way your thinking. I meant that he was the only family member that I cared for. I didn't mean-" but Remus interrupted her.

" It's okay," he said smiling gently at her. He couldn't he but feel a bit happier on hearing her say that.

" He's gone, finally that blood traitor is gone."A grimly voice said from the hall. " Mistress would be happy that he's gone, not here to ruin the Black family name."

Tonks stood up furious and was about to walk out there and confront the house elf but Remus grabbed her firmly.

" He shouldn't say that. Sirius doesn't deserve that horrid creature fouling his name like that," Tonks said furiously, struggling against Remus hold. But she gave up and started to cry again.

" I know, I know Tonks," once again Remus held her.

" I need a drink" She said and waved her wand and a bottle of whiskey appeared. She grabbed the bottle and didn't bother with a cup.

Remus would have stopped her but he himself needed a drink, though he grabbed a cup. After a couple of drinks, Remus and Tonks were a bit drunk, though at least she wasn't crying anymore, Remus thought.

"I always lose people I love." Tonks sadly told him. " I lost my cousin to death and I lost you."

Remus was startled to hear her say that. Love?

" What do you mean?" He asked.

" I liked you but you-you never liked me. And I like you a lot," She hiccupped and added, " I still like you."

She looked sadly down, " I'll always be alone."

" Your not alone, Tonks I'm here," Remus said he wrapped an arm around her shoulder. She put her head against his neck.

She then pressed a kiss on him. He was so surprise that Remus pulled back suddenly. She looked so hurt that he reached for her. " I'm sorry, I didn't mean that."

" Yeah you did, you don't like me. You think of me as a child," Tonks cried. "I'm not, you know, I'm an adult."

" I know that. That's why I have to be careful around you. I like you, Tonks. I don't want to do anything that you would make you feel uncomfortable," He said gently.

Tonks then looked up at him, her eyes straying to his face. " Then kiss me."

" W-what?"

" Kiss me. Show me that you like me or I won't believe you," Tonks demanded. She closed her eyes and leaned in closed.

Remus hesitated for a second but it must have been the drinks or something, because he grabbed her face and kissed her softly on her lips. The kiss seemed to go on for ever but soon he stopped to take a breath.

Tonks arms pulled him back and they kissed again but this time more passionately. He knew in the back of his mind, the part which was reasonable, that he shouldn't being doing this but the he had wanted to kiss her since he had fallen for her so many months ago.

Tonks hand started to unbutton his shirt but he stopped her. " We can't." When he saw that she didn't understand he added, " Kreacher will see us."

" Then lets go to my apartment" Tonks suggested.

Remus nodded and they quickly went outside and vanished to Tonks Apartment. *

Remus woke to an owl pecking at his face. He shooed the owl away, his head throbbing a bit because of last night's drinking. He turned around and saw Tonks fast asleep beside him. Her pink hair spread around her head like a halo. She looked so young and innocent that he felt regret tear him apart. What had happened last night shouldn't have had happened. He couldn't allow her to get close to him and risk her getting hurt. He care to much about her to allow her to be put in harms way. He leaned in close and kissed her gently on her cheek. He then noticed the note from Dumbledore.***

Tonks woke up to the rays of the sun shining brightly through her window. She closed her eyes and smiled. She remembered last night, it had been fantastic. Not the whole crying part but the fact that Remus had told her he liked her too. And then, Tonks blushed, just thinking about it. She opened her eyes, wondering of Remus was beside her.

She was alone on her bed, the sheets tangled around her. Tonks first thought that he must be in the shower but couldn't hear the water running. Frowning she got up and with the sheets around her, went to the bathroom. It was empty, odd she thought, did he go to the kitchen?

She went back to the room and notice that only her clothes were scattered on the floor. She quickly grabbed a long t-shirt and pulled it on. She walked bare foot to the kitchen but it was empty also. Tonks then had a sunken feeling; it was dawning on her what was going on. She noticed a note on the table that confirmed her worst fear. Written neatly in Remus Lupin's writing the note read:

Tonks,

I'm sorry I couldn't tell you in person but I was called away in an urgent message. I think we should talk about what happened last night. It shouldn't have had happened, we both were drunk and it went too far.

I promise I won't happen again,

Remus Lupin

Tonks felt like she was punched in the stomach. She quickly sat down on a chair, and re read the note. The best night of her life and he regretted it?

Tonks slammed her fist in the table, "You're a coward, Remus Lupin."