(Thank you everyone for your kind words of support. It means so much and makes me want to continue writing it :-) I'm going to try to get up at least one chapter everyday, maybe two on Sundays. Thank you again for your support. It means the world to me! There is one that I would like to address, and not in a negative way I assure you! It said that I need to add a bit more detail, I'm guessing in reference to the way I don't really describe where they are. The reason I don't do this is so that way the reader can determine what their version of Hogwarts looked like. I don't want to dictate every single detail. If it's important that a place is detailed I'll certainly add detail. I will try to add a little more though. Thank you so much for the feedback and the favorites and the following! It means the world!)
"I told you Professor. I don't know why those boys did what they did. Perhaps it was to try and knock me down a few pegs so to speak? Maybe it was because they wanted to see how I would react? Maybe it's all a cruel prank? I don't know sir and that's the honest truth." Lily insists, staring into the blue eyes of Professor Albus Dumbledore. She tries not to figit, knowing that's a surefire sign of a liar.
"Are you one hundred percent certain Ms. Evans?" Professor Dumbledore asks once more, studying the girl in front of him very closely. "There can't be anything that you could think of, for sure, that these boys would have to corner you and treat you as they did?"
"Maybe because I'm from Gryffindor and we're playing them tomorrow? Sir, I truly can not tell you why they cornered me and did what they did to me." Lily makes sure to keep her voice steady and calm.
"Very well Ms. Evans, you may return to your day. If you think of any reason, let me know." Lily nods and promises that she will, rising from the chair. As she walks out she sees Nott's smug smirk. He knew you wouldn't tell. It'll only cause more issues for you than it's worth and he knows that. He's exploiting that. Lily calmly leaves the headmaster's room and descends the griffon stairwell. She makes her way downstairs to try and find her friend Severus. She needed to know why he didn't stand up for her, why he did nothing to stop the boys from dragging her away, why he did nothing.
Lily checks the Great Hall, the library, the potions classrooms and even the boathouse where Severus would sometimes go to think and for silence. He was nowhere to be found. This wasn't like him. Normally Lily could locate him pretty easily. She knows Severus like she knows herself. Or you think you do.Lily shakes away her doubts, walking around the castle and hoping to bump into him by chance. No such luck.
After an hour and a half of looking, Lily walks upstairs and to her bedroom. She climbs through the portrait hole and walks up into her bedroom. Tears spring to her eyes as she shuts the door, the events of the day hitting her.
She had been slapped, abused by three young men. She had been saved by one of the biggest jerks in Hogwarts. She had been abandoned by her supposed best friend. She had never felt more confused or abandoned in her entire life. Sobs rack through her body as she sits on her bed and hugs a pillow, letting her mind be free to make up all sorts of thoughts. Tears stain her shirt and the pillow as she sobs uncontrollably, feeling more alone than she had ever felt in her life. She couldn't go home as the train to London had already left. She didn't have anyone to celebrate it here with as Rebecca and Mary had both gone home to their families. She was truly alone in the world.
"Lily? Are you in here?" James gently calls from the bottom of the stairs, having seen her walk up to her room. She had seemed upset and he could hear the sound of crying through the wooden door and down the stairs. Sadly, he couldn't go up due to the charm the founders had put on the girl's dormitory staircase.
"Go away Potter!" Lily shouts at the door, feeling the lump in her throat grow. She didn't want to look at his smug face again. James looked down, going to the couch to sit with his friends.
"It was worth a shot mate." Sirius pats his friend on the shoulder supportively. "She'll be okay. She's strong. I'm sure she's up there studying or something."
Lily cries into her pillow, now getting angry. She was supposed to come to Hogwarts and have the most amazing time and be able to do magic and make friends and have Severus by her side. Not come to Hogwarts and have a halfway amazing time halfway horrendous time where she barely made friends and was slowly but surely losing her best friend because of other people. Lily's eyes dry and she stands up, deciding to put her feelings into her magic practice instead of wasting time on tears.
"Avis," Lily says in a clear voice, summoning birds. Taking aim at the wall, she clearly says "opungio." The birds obey the spell, slamming head first into the wall and disappearing. Lily wipes her face and opens up the charms book Severus had given her, wanting to try something new.
This was what Lily did for the remaining hours of the day. She transfigured her bed spread into a stack of towels then back into a bed spread then into a tea set. She then made streamers shoot from the tip of her wand to hang over the top of her bed to give the room a more festive feel. After that, she transfigured Mary's bed into a decorated Christmas tree. Just because things haven't been going as well as I had hoped doesn't mean I get to mope around and do nothing with my life. I'm going to be the best dang witch these 'purebloods' have ever seen. Lily promises herself, looking around her room.
Gone were the boring and messy four poster beds. Instead in their places stood two giant Christmas trees, fully decorated, and one fake ice skating rink with magical skating people on it, and one record player playing Christmas songs on repeat. Red and green streamers hung from the ceiling with magical snow appearing to fall from the ceiling but never actually touching the ground. Lily had created her own Christmas wonderland inside of her dormitory.
Lily throws herself down onto her bed, smiling slightly. She doesn't need Severus or Petunia or even friends to have a good Christmas holiday. Yes, she was alone, but why did she have to let her dark thoughts win? Especially when those dark thoughts were encouraged by people like Nott who made her feel awful about herself? No. Lily would have one of the best Christmas's the world had ever heard of and that was that. Did she want to cry? Yes. Would she? Probably. But in this moment, Lily was happy with herself-at least a little bit. She was willing to see how long this would last.
A knock at the door causes Lily to sit up from her laying position. "Come in!" She grants permission for the person to come in, a curious frown on her face. A small, chubby, first year slowly opens the door. "Can I help you?"
"Are you Lily Evans?" The little girl's voice is very timid and shy, practically shaking with fear.
"I am," Lily affirms, standing up from her bed and soothing down the red and gold duvet.
"There's a boy waiting for you outside the common room. He's from Slytherin." Severus. Lily thanks the girl and straightens her outfit, grabbing her wand and putting it where it belongs. She would face him with the courage of any Gryffindors before her. She walks down the stairs, her heart pounding in her chest. She didn't even stop to tell Potter and his friends that they were being too loud with their game of wizarding chess or tell the first years that a bezoar was found in the stomach of a goat, not the stomach of a sheep. Slowly, she opened the portrait hole, finding her best friend pacing back and forth on the landing.
"Can I help you Severus?" Lily tries to keep her voice light but she can feel the lump in her throat rising. She could faintly hear the sound of students chattering in the dining room from below.
"Lily! I wasn't sure you would come out. I wanted to make sure that you're okay. I mean, what Nott and those idiots did to you.. It wasn't okay." Severus nervously says, his hands fidgeting by his sides. He was wearing the robes Lily had gotten him.
"No it wasn't okay but you let it happen. You didn't even try to stand up for me Sev. How are we supposed to be best friends when you don't stand up for me? I always stand up for you. To anyone- Potter, other Gryffindors, Slytherins, anyone." Lily sighs, brushing her hair off of her forehead. "Why don't you stand up for me? I don't get it Sev."
"I'm sorry, it's just, they said if I ever stood up for you that they would hurt me and then hurt you twice as bad." Severus scratches his nose and glances off to the right. He's lying.
"Sev, are you lying to me? You know how much I hate liars."
"I would never lie to you Lily. Listen, I've got to go right now but I'll see you later okay? We still good for our annual Christmas evening walk around the grounds?" Lily decides to let it go and nods in agreement. What else could she do without losing her friend? "Great, I'll see you then." He smiles triumphantly and makes his way down the cold, stone steps. Lily stands at the top of the stairs for a few moments, watching his black hair disappear as he goes lower and lower, before she says the password and walks into the common room once more.