This was a plot bunny gnawing at my brain after I saw a friend's post of Facebook who did exactly the same thing.

Thank you so much to everyone who's sent me prompts! I am working my way through them :D I don't know if 'Cold Callers' is a British term, in case it is, Pepper explains it, I'm sure you'll understand :)

Please please PLEASE review! And keep the prompts coming :)

It was a lazy evening at the tower, the team was recovering from two mutant snakes attempting to rob the national bank a few hours earlier and weren't doing a lot of talking. Tony was lying on the sofa, half asleep, his head resting on Pepper's lap as she went through her emails. Clint had fallen asleep in an armchair and was snoring softly. Natasha was cleaning her throwing knives and Steve was polishing his shield. Thor was sat on the floor by the fire with Bruce, who was trying to explain to him the process which had caused him to turn into the Hulk after he kept asking every five seconds.

The ring of the telephone woke them all up. Clint sat bolt upright and immediately went to notch an arrow, not realising his bow and quiver were on the ground beside him, instead he just ended up looking a bit daft. JARVIS was currently installing some much needed upgrades, so some of his non-important systems were down, including the phone. Tony sleepily called up a visual screen in front of him, frowning when the number came up as 'international.'

'Cold caller?' Pepper asked, frowning. 'I thought we didn't get those?'

'They always find a way around it,' Tony said, sighing. Then a wicked glint came into his eyes and he answered the phone.

'You're through to the Stark Industries Gender Reassignment Clinic, how may I direct your call?' Tony said, enunciating clearly while Pepper, Clint and Bruce shoved their hands over their mouths to prevent themselves from bursting out into laughter. Natasha simply rolled her eyes but was smirking anyway, and Steve and Thor had no idea what was going on.

Tony put the phone onto speaker so they could all hear whoever it was waffling on and on in a broad Indian accent about how they could have been mis-sold loan insurance and how important it was they sign up to their company in order to ensure that they weren't being swindled by anyone.

Steve looked at Tony with a quizzical expression on his face, clearly thinking that this was something important, to his out of date ears it certainly sounded pretty important. Tony shrugged at him and flicked through the pages of that month's edition of Top Gear that he'd left on the sofa, un-interested while the man on the phone carried on talking. Pepper whispered something in his ear and he grinned wickedly.

The man on the phone finished his speech and Tony said clearly: 'So were you interested in having the operation to become a woman? We're currently having a sale on DD cup sizes.'

There was a pause. And then: 'I'm sorry… operation?'

'I'll get Richard for you,' Tony said, and Pepper leant over him and said, politely, as girly as she could manage:

'Good afternoon, this is Richard speaking, how may I help you?'

'You're called Richard?!'

'That is correct, I had a gender reassignment operation to become a woman a few months ago, now how may I help you?' Pepper asked, politely.

Tony buried his face in his sleeve to stop himself laughing and Clint and Bruce looked like they were about to explode, even Natasha had a hand over her mouth to prevent giggles. Thor and Steve were still looking very confused.

'Um… I'm sorry I think I may have the wrong number…' the man on the phone said.

'Oh don't worry, a lot of people are nervous,' Pepper said, calmly. a smug grin on her face. 'Now what operation were you thinking of having done?'

'Um… I better go…' the man said, and hung up.

Bruce and Clint exploded into laughter and Pepper high-fived her boyfriend, Natasha giggling on the sofa.

'I think they might think twice before calling here again,' Bruce said, once he was able to breath again.

'I don't understand…' Thor said slowly, with the tone of one who doesn't want the universe to end.

'It was a cold caller,' Pepper explained. 'Someone who phones up trying to offer you payment protection insurance or a better loan deal when really all they're going to do is charge you a lot of money and not do anything.'

'I freaking love you,' Tony said, once the laughter had subsided slightly.

Pepper grinned.

'So… they're bad?' Steve said.

'Yes,' Pepper said. 'They're bad, and shouldn't be listened too.'

'Well now that we're all awake how about some pizza?' Natasha said. 'I'm starving.'

'I'll have Pepperoni, please Tasha,' Tony said, smirking.

Pepper whacked him.

Please review! And if anyway didn't understand Pepper's explanation send me a message :) Love to you all!