i know, i know, i know...it took me longer to update. but i only foresee one more chapter after this one and then this story is finished...

so enjoy!

;-)

Sakura rushed home and nearly broke her key in the lock as she desperately jammed it into the key hole.

Dashing over to her phone, she cradled it between her shoulder and head as she dialed the phone number that Temari had written down.
Her heart beat wildly in her chest as the phone rang…and rang…and rang.
Sakura counted eleven rings before she hung up the phone and cursed loudly.

Taking a few deep breaths to calm down, she picked up the phone again and redialed the number slower just in case she had hit the wrong number during her rush before.

Again the phone just rang in her ear.

"Shit!" Sakura screamed as she threw her phone to the ground.
All she could think about was that Temari had given her a wrong number and this opportunity would be gone forever.

Taking another few calming breaths, Sakura recollected herself.

"Relax Sakura," she said aloud to herself. "They're probably just not home yet. I'll call them later tonight."

Plopping herself down onto the couch, she turned on her TV for the first time in weeks.
Wildly flipping through the channels, she couldn't help but stop to look at the clock every few minutes or so.

Deciding that an hour of waiting constituted as 'later', she picked up her phone from off of the ground and redialed Temari's number.

The phone rang a few times and Sakura felt as her heart grew heavier and heavier with each ring.

Just when she thought her stomach had swallowed her heart whole, it leapt back to its place when she heard the phone stop ringing, only to be replaced with a loud munching noise and a muffled, "What?".

"He…hello," Sakura stuttered. "Is Temari or Kankuro there?"

"This is Kankuro." the voice said.

"Hi Kankuro, this is Sakura."

"Hmm, don't know you…sorry." Kankuro said.

"WAIT!" Sakura shouted loudly into the phone. "I'm the doctor you met outside of the hospital. The one that can fix Gaara."

Silence followed, but Sakura knew that Kankuro was still there because she could still hear him munching on something.

After a few moments of silence, Sakura heard him yell, "Temari! Phone!"

Then the munching died away as Sakura heard the phone clunk loudly onto a hard surface.

Straining her ears to hear what was going on at the other line, she heard footsteps and Temari's voice ask, "Who is it?"

"It's that Sakura chick." Kankuro said, his mouth sounding like it was full of food once again.

"Stop eating! If you don't eat my dinner again I'll stop buying chips for you to eat!"

"Whatever…" was all that Sakura heard as a response from Kankuro because the rest of it was mumbled.
She couldn't stop herself from imagining Gaara standing in the background shaking his head at his siblings.
But he's not…she sadly reminded herself, he's at the hospital all alone.

"Hello." Temari said as she picked up the phone.

Cutting right to the chase, Sakura asked, "When can we meet?"

"Wow, you don't waste any time, do you?" Temari said flatly.

"Not when it comes to Gaara." Sakura persisted. "When can we meet?"

"Oi, Temari!" Sakura heard Kankuro yell from somewhere. "Let's go get some dinner from a restaurant because there's no way I'm touching this slop that you made."

Sakura had to stop herself from laughing as she heard the slew of colorful swear words that streamed from Temari's mouth.

I see that Gaara's temper runs in the family…she smiled to herself.

Temari exhaled loudly into the phone and asked her, "Can you meet us out to eat in a thirty minutes?"

"Yes," Sakura said enthusiastically. "What restaurant?"

Sakura copied down the information that Temari gave to her and hung up the phone.

Rushing to put on her shoes and coat once again, she ran out to her car and headed to the restaurant.

Sakura arrived before Temari or Kankuro did.
carefully scanning every car that pulled into the parking lot, she quickly became more apprehensive at every car that wasn't them.
Finally she saw two figures walking towards the restaurant and immediately recognized them as the two people she was waiting for.
Waving to their attention, she got out of her car and walked to them.

"Hello again," she said as she approached them.

"Hi." Temari said shortly. "Thanks for meeting us out here."

"It's no problem. Thanks for agreeing to see me."

"Hn." was all that Temari said as she stuffed her hands into her coat pockets.

"Can we go inside?" Kankuro whined, "We're not going to get fed out here."

Throwing him an impatient look, Temari moved towards the restaurant with Kankuro and Sakura in her wake.

Once they were seated at a table, Temari immediately started talking. "Before I tell you anything, how can you be sure that you can help Gaara?"

"Well, for starters, I'm the only one he's ever opened up to. Before I came along, he wouldn't let anyone near him; but he lets me. He talks to me and sometimes he even lets me touch him."

Sakura fought back the blush that threatened to rush to her cheeks as she flashed back to their kiss.

"Also," she continued. "He's been taken off of Nembutal completely."

Temari's eyes widened at this and Kankuro choked on the water that he was taking a sip of.

"He's off of that drug?!" Temari said disbelievingly.

Sakura only nodded proudly.

Kankuro and Temari exchanged looks, then returned their attention back to Sakura.

"Then why do you need our help? It sounds like you have everything under control." Kankuro said as she folded up a menu.

"Because he won't let me in completely. I need to know what happened him up to and including the night where he was dropped off at the hospital.

Kankuro's eyes suddenly avoided Sakura and Temari shifted in her seat.

"Why would you want to know about that?" Temari asked quietly, playing with her fingers.

"Because if I know that then I can better understand where he's coming from. Once I know the whole story, then it's only a matter of time before he's better."

The waitress suddenly appeared at their table with a bright smile and asked for their orders.

Sakura simply ordered a coffee while Temari ordered a small dinner and Kankuro seemed to order everything on the left side of the menu.

Sakura couldn't help but notice that throughout the exchange with the waitress, Temari's eyes were calculating her, sizing her up, and weighing Sakura's words.

When the waitress disappeared with their orders, Temari started the conversation up again.

"What happened to that blonde woman that was his doctor before?"

"Tsunade?" Sakura asked in order to confirm that it was the same blonde woman that Temari was thinking of.
When Temari nodded, Sakura continued, "She's still there. She was in charge of Gaara until I came and took over his case for her."

"You look awfully young to have seniority over that Tsunade woman…" Temari said skeptically.

"Well, actually I'm just a volunteer for now…" Sakura said as she rubbed the back of her head with her hand.

"A volunteer…" Temari said in disbelief. "And why would they put a volunteer on my brother's case?"

"Well…" Sakura started, trying to find the best way to explain it. "You see…Gaara, he, well…"

Waving her hand to silence Sakura, Temari cut in, "Because in my professional experience, volunteers are put in charge of smaller or unimportant cases. Which tells me that the hospital has given up on our brother and that you're just here to find out some dirty laundry on our family. All of which won't help our brother in any way."

"But…" Sakura said but was interrupted as Temari stood up.

"Come on Kankuro, let's go home."

Kankuro pointed harshly to the kitchen and Temari yelled at him, "Would you forget about your stomach for five seconds! We'll pick you up something on the way home."

Now desperate, Sakura reached out and grabbed Temari's sleeve.

"Wait...My relationship with Gaara is a little more complex then just patient/doctor."

Temari raised her eyebrows, waiting for Sakura to elaborate.

"If you sit down, I'll tell you more. But know that I tell you this in complete confidence and trust that you will not tell anyone else this…just as I won't tell anyone else what you tell me about yourselves or Gaara."

Kankuro looked relieved when Temari sat back down and Temari nodded in agreement. "What is said at this table stays at this table."

Taking a deep breath, Sakura confessed, "My interaction with Gaara can be described as more than just an 'interaction'…it's more of an intimate interaction."

Sakura let her implication hang in the air and watched as Temari's eyes widened and Kankuro's jaw dropped simultaneously.

"You mean…he…you…" Temari stuttered pointing at Sakura.

Nodding shyly, Sakura smiled slightly in response.

Temari let out an elated yelp as she grabbed Kankuro's arm. "You see!? I told you he could go back to normal!"

Kankuro rolled his eyes at his sister and refocused onto Sakura.

Wanting to bring Temari's attention back to the subject at hand, Sakura asked, "What happened to Gaara?"

Sakura's question immediately wiped Temari's smile off of her face.
Temari opened her mouth but immediately stopped when the waitress came by with their food.
When she was gone, Kankuro dug hungrily into his dinner, but Temari seemed to hesitate.

"Temari," Sakura said, "please tell me."

Temari shook her head sadly and turned her head away.

"Temari," Kankuro said suddenly serious, "tell her. She, out of everyone, deserves to know. If Gaara trusts her, why shouldn't we?"

Temari's eyes wavered with emotion at Kankuro;s statment and then refocused onto Sakura as she started, "Our mother was the one thing that made our family functional. She was the rock for Kankuro and I, and especially our father. Our father was a difficult man to live with to say the least. He was always working, always angry, and always on edge; but for some reason our mother seemed to disarm him. She was the one good thing that all of us had in our lives…and Gaara took her away. She died giving birth to him, and our family crumbled at her absence. I often wonder how we all would have turned out if our mother had lived. Who knows, maybe Gaara would be normal still…"
Shaking her head to clear her digressing thoughts, Temari continued, "After the death of our mother, our father devoted himself to work and work alone. We no longer existed in his world. He couldn't even look at us because we reminded him of our mother. And he hated Gaara. He blamed Gaara for killing our mother…I would often hear him yelling at Gaara in his crib, telling him that he was a monster. I should have stopped him but I was so young…and…I thought the same thing as well at the time.
Eventually our uncle came in to take care of us since our father's absence from the house kept getting longer and longer. There were some nights where he didn't even come home. I didn't trust our uncle though…"

"WE didn't trust our uncle." Kankuro interjected.

Temari nodded and corrected herself, "We didn't trust him. He was never around us when our mother was alive. She would always tell us to stay away from him as well. So we did. We were too little to fully understand what was happening, but even back then there was just some way in which he held us on his lap or the way he said things that didn't feel right to us. So when he started to fill in for our mother at home, Kankuro and I stayed away from him. Our uncle obviously noticed this and focused all of his attention on Gaara. He claimed that since Gaara was still a baby, he needed to focus all of his energy onto him; but I knew he was lying.
As Gaara got older, I think he started to feel uncomfortable around our uncle as well because he would often shy away from him. But yet, you could tell that Gaara really loved our uncle. After all, our uncle was like a mother to him, it's understandable.
One day though, when Gaara was six, we were all playing outside and Gaara fell down and hit his head on a rock that was in our yard. I remember seeing the blood slowly trickle down the bump and our uncle was immediately at his side, hugging Gaara into him. I knew that there was something off about our uncle's reaction to Gaara's fall because Gaara wasn't even crying, he was just simply rubbing his head.
I remember our uncle dragging Gaara inside as he told Kankuro and me to stay outside while he cleaned Gaara up. Not wanting to get into trouble, we did what our uncle told us to do…that is until we heard Gaara screaming."

The sound of a plate scraping on the table caught Sakura's attention, and she looked over to find Kankuro pushing away his food. He had a sad look on his face, and he simply stared out of the window with glazed eyes.

"Kankuro and I rushed inside and ran through the house looking for Gaara. He was making the worst sounds I have ever heard in my entire life…I still have nightmares about them. I would sporadically hear our uncle yelling at him as well in between screams and I couldn't understand what he was yelling about. All I kept hearing was him yelling that he hated Gaara and that he deserves this and how dare Gaara refuse him. Back then I didn't understand, but now I'm sure you can figure out what had happened.
Then we heard a loud smack and a thud, and then the light sound of Gaara's small feet running down the upstairs hall followed by our uncle's heavier stride.
Gaara kept yelling 'no' and the next thing I heard was our uncle scream and fall heavily down the stairs, only to land in a bloody twisted heap at our feet at the bottom of the staircase."

Temari rubbed the palms of her hands against her eyes as she finished, "I don't remember much after that. I remember looking up the staircase and seeing Gaara staring down at us from the top of them. I remember seeing how much his forehead was bleeding and seeing the symbol that someone had carved into it. To this day I don't know whether it was our uncle or Gaara himself that carved it. The last thing I remember is seeing our dad grab Gaara and drag him out the door telling us that it would be the last time that we would get to see him. I thought our father killed him that night, I really did, because he never talked about him again. It was as if Gaara had been erased from our lives…But one night I heard dad talking on the phone to someone and he mentioned Gaara and a mental institution. So Kankuro and I did some investigating and found him. And…well, I'm sure you know the rest from there."

Sakura nodded sadly, "Yeah I do, you visited him twice and then left him there all alone."

"What would you have done?" Temari shot back. "Gaara killed our mother and our uncle. I know that he didn't mean to kill both of them, but I was young! I only saw him as a murderous monster. And then when we try to visit him he tried to attack us and then the next time we see him he's so drugged up he can't even lift his own arm…what would you have done?"

Sakura dropped her gaze to the table and shook her head, "I want to say that I would have kept visiting him…but I can't. I would have done the same thing."

Silence engulfed the three of them until Kankuro stood up and threw some money down onto the table, "That covers your coffee as well. Take care of yourself Sakura…let's go Temari."

Temari nodded and stood up as well.
Still seated, Sakura's mind couldn't register their leaving. Standing up as they turned their backs on her, she said, "Do you want me to give Gaara a message for you?"

Temari turned around and smiled sadly as she shook her head, "It wouldn't be fair to him for us to suddenly reappear into his life after such a long absence."

"Well…then do you want me to keep you updated on his progress?"

Temari shook her head again and replied, "Just give him our number and tell him to call it if he wants. If he calls us then we'll go from there, and if not, then…well, then he doesn't."

Sakura followed them with her eyes as they exited the restaurant.
The waitress came by and swept up the money, counting it as she walked away.

Sakura jolted into motion all of a sudden and dashed out of the restaurant.
She ran out of the parking lot until she saw the two backs of Gaara's siblings.

"Thank you!" she yelled after them. And Kankuro simply lifted his arm in the air and gave her a backwards wave.

Getting back into her car, Sakura sat behind the wheel as her mind raced.
She was infuriated.
She was angry at Gaara's uncle for doing what he did to Gaara.
Annoyed at Gaara's father for abandoning him in that hospital like that.
But she was mostly furious at the fact that Gaara hadn't told her about this, that he didn't trust her enough to tell her what had happened that day.

Driving furiously back to her apartment, she only entered long enough to pick up Gaara's case file and then left once again.
It was late, and she knew that no one except the night workers would be at the hospital, but she had to bring everything to the surface now while it was still fresh in her mind; otherwise something might be lost forever.
The gray December clouds let loose a mixture of snow, ice, and rain as Sakura drove to the hospital. The moisture and the strong stormy wind that was picking up chilled her to the bone after she swerved into an empty parking spot and marched into the hospital.

The building seemed to moan as the storm hit it and its structure creaked like brittle bones from the cold and the moisture.
Making her way directly to Gaara's room, she found him sitting on his bed reading Poe once again.

His unexpressive look that he gave her only infuriated her more as she stood in his doorway with her chest heaving.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she seethed.

"Tell you what?" Gaara asked as he returned his attention back to his book.

"Don't do that!" She said.

"What?"

"Ignore me!" She yelled, and her voice echoed down the hallway.

Calmly closing his book, he said, "Sakura. You burst into my room in the middle of the night yelling at me and demanding why I didn't tell you something when I have no idea what you're talking about."

"I've spent the last few months of my life devoted to you and your case. I've spent countless hours reading and rereading your file hoping to find some sort of clue into your past. A clue to let me into the parts of your life that you won't tell me about…"

"I told you that you were wasting your time." Gaara said, putting the book down beside him.

"Wasting my time…" Sakura repeated quietly. Her whole body shook in fury as she glared hard at him.
"Wasting my time…" she said again as her voice shook. "I've ignored my friends, my family, every normal aspect of my life and focused all of my attention onto getting you better. Into getting you out of here. To getting you on your feet and living a normal life…and for what? NOTHING!" she screamed as she threw his file at him.
The papers flew everywhere and floated to the ground in scattered patterns.

Gaara's eyes widened at her action.

"Why won't you just let me in? Why won't you just TRUST me?!" she yelled.

"I can't…" he said quietly.

"Why? Why can't you? Are you afraid that if you trust me I'll try to do something to you? That I would turn on you and twist our affection just like your uncle did?"

Gaara stiffened as his eyes widened more.

"That's right," Sakura continued. "I know now. I talked to your siblings and they told me everything. It seems they trust me more then you ever will…"

Gaara's look of shock darkened to one of anger.
Sakura watched as his jaw muscles clenched and unclenched in anger and anxiety.

Standing up he clenched and unclenched his fingers. "You…" he said as he paced back and forth.

"You…why did you…"

"I had to know, Gaara. One way or another I was going to find out; and when the opportunity presented itself to me, I took it. But don't you see that this is a good thing? Because I now know what happened you can trust me, and believe me when I say that I will keep it a secret. Now that I know, you don't have to worry about scaring me away…"

Gaara just continually shook his head as he grabbed at his hair, quickening his pacing. "No…no…no…no…" he kept repeating.

"Gaara…stop pacing and listen to me." Sakura said as she reached out for him.

Grabbing his arm, he violently pulled it away and yelled, "NO!"

Sakura let go immediately and stared at him.

"You don't understand…" he said sadly. "Now that you know everything is different. You pity me now, you feel sorry for me…it's not the same. Before you were here because you wanted to be, but now you're just here out of sympathy."

Shaking her head, she grabbed Gaara's face in her hands and said, "That's not why I'm here Gaara…that's not the reason at all. I'm here because…"

Her sentence was interrupted by his lips pressed against hers.
The force of his kiss pushed her back up against the wall, and his body pursued hers and pinned her against it.

"Because…" she managed to get out when their first kiss broke, but she was only interrupted by another passionate one.

"Because I…" she said as his lips traveled down to her neck.
Her fingers clawed against his back as she felt his wander over her body.
Strong, nimble fingers tugged at her clothing and Sakura gasped as her shirt was ripped open. She went to complain about his aggressive action, but her objection was replaced with a gasp as his cold lips and fingers explored skin that they had never explored before.
Goosebumps appeared all over her body and shivers were sent up her spine at his icy touch. His lips traveled across her collarbone and down to her breasts. Sakura fumbled with her own bra as her breathing came out in short gasps.
Her actions were rewarded immediately as Gaara's mouth engulfed her nipples and sent shivers of frost and pleasure throughout her body.

His fingers moved to her jeans, and before she knew it, she was stepping out of them and wrapping her legs around his waist as he hoisted her up against the wall.
She pulled his shirt over his head and took in the sight of his pale naked torso. She ran her fingers over his thin yet strong stomach and watched as his muscles shivered under her fingers.

She took control as he closed his eyes when she pulled him into her so that she could kiss his neck.
After only a few kisses, Gaara growled at her and pulled away.
Sakura whimpered at the thought of him leaving her again.
He walked over to his desk and opened up a drawer. Pulling out restraints, he returned to her and grabbed her wrists. Turning her around so that her face was pressed roughly against the wall, he tied the restraints tightly around her wrists and then returned to kissing her neck and the back of her shoulders.

He always has to be in control…Sakura thought to herself as she leaned back into him as his hands explored her body.
Moaning at his caresses, Sakura felt as her skin began to heat up.
Gaara hissed at the heat and Sakura remembered how he had said that her touch burned him.

But yet his whole body was cold, and his skin burned hers as well from its wintriness.

Before she could register what was happening, Sakura found herself bent over Gaara's bed with her face buried into the bed's covers. She felt as Gaara aggressively pulled down her underwear and entered her roughly. The blankets muffled Sakura's moaning scream at the feeling of him inside of her.

His actions were quick and rough.
His hip bones hit against her harshly and she knew that she was going to have bruises from them.
Pulling on her arm restraints, Sakura's body was forced to lift and Gaara whispered huskily into her ear, "Is this what you wanted?"

Sakura couldn't bring herself to answer him, she could only moan as his actions grew even quicker and as he pushed her back down.

Her skin broke out into a sweat and her fair skin was red from the heat that was emanating from it.

Suddenly Gaara's hands tightened against her waist and with a short gasp he finished.
They stayed in the position they were in, with Sakura gasping for breath and with Gaara collapsed on top of her back.

Sakura felt his chest expand and shrink as he gasped for breath and felt as he started to shake from his exertions.

Sakura knew that she should try to comfort him, after all, that was the most physical contact he had ever had in his life.
Twisting her wrists, she found that the knots that Gaara had tied wouldn't budge.
Gaara slouched off of her and collapsed onto the bed.

Sakura stood up and twisted her arms around more vigorously, but the restraints wouldn't budge.

She heard a low and deep sound coming from Gaara and she turned around and found him laughing.
Her eyes widened in surprise…he was laughing.
She had hardly ever seen him crack a smile, and now he was laughing.

Pointing at her arms he said, "Now that's how you tie a knot."

Sakura's mouth dropped open as their first interaction reentered into her mind.

Narrowing her eyes at him, she said, "Well, don't just lay there…help me!"

Gaara smirked and pulled the longer restraint that acted like a leash to his knots so that she collapsed onto the bed next to him. With easy motions, she felt the knots loosen and she easily slipped her hands out of the restraints.

"Thanks…" she mumbled.

He didn't respond, he just nodded and stared at the floor blankly.

Walking over to her clothes, she quickly got dressed in case someone walked by and saw her.
Deciding that her shirt wasn't completely ruined, she pulled it on and returned to sit down next to Gaara who had put on his pants but remained shirtless.

"Gaara…" she said, "you and I need to have a serious talk about all of this."

Gaara nodded and said, "I know...You never finished telling me why you're here." he said staring at her.
She couldn't help but notice the hope in his eyes…

Playing with her fingers she said, "I'm here because…" but she hesitated once again.
If she said this then there would be no turning back. She knew that if she finished her thought he would be bound to her forever. Taking a deep breath she tried to think of her life before he had appeared and found it boring and meaningless.
"I'm here because I love you." she finished and then waited for his reaction.

His eyes widened and then darted back and forth as they glistened with raw emotions.

Sitting up he whispered, "Can you say that again?"

Sakura's heart grew heavy when she realized that this was probably the first time anyone had ever told him this.
Taking his face firmly between her hands she said, "I love you."

Pulling his face out of her embrace he asked, "Will you stay here tonight?"

"Of course." Sakura said as she ran her fingers through his hair. "Are you going to read some more?"

Gaara shook his head and laid down on his bed as he grasped her shirt material and bunched it up into a firm grip. "No, I think I'm going to sleep tonight."

"But I thought you don't like to sleep." she teased him slightly.

"I don't." he said as he closed his eyes. "But maybe now it will be different…"

Sakura watched as she quickly slipped into a deep sleep, the whole time grasping onto her shirt.

She ran her fingers gently over his exposed skin and marveled at its coolness.
He's so cold because no one ever loved him. Love has never taken root inside of him to warm him up…he's only ever existed as a cold, loveless being.

She leaned against the wall and slowly drifted off to sleep as she listened to Gaara's breath slip in and out evenly. She couldn't help but smile as she realized that although his skin was still cold, it wasn't as cold as it had been before…

When Sakura opened her eyes again it was still dark out.
Checking the clock in the room she saw that she had only drifted off for an hour or so.

Returning her attention back to the bed, she noticed that Gaara was gone.

Her heart immediately began to beat wildly as she jumped out of bed and rushed out to the hallway.

She strained her hears for any sort of noise but she didn't hear anything.

Entering the big rec-room, the wind beat the rain and ice wildly against the large windows.
Sakura rushed over to a window and scanned the grounds for Gaara.

She saw him.

He was standing in the middle of the field with his hands in his pant pockets. Sakura gasped when she noticed that he still didn't have a shirt on.

What does he think he's doing?! she thought to herself as she rushed towards the nearest exit. He's going to catch his death out there!

As soon as she got outside, the wind blew her clothes and hair wildly. Sprinting to Gaara, she winced as the rain and ice whipped against her face and exposed skin that her ripped shirt left open.

"Gaara!" she called to him as she ran to his side.

"He never touched me like that." Gaara said.

"What?!" Sakura yelled as she shielded her face against the storm. She noticed that he was shaking and that his lips were turning blue.
I have to warm him up... she thought to herself as she surveyed his condition.

"My uncle," Gaara said louder, "he never touched me. I wouldn't let him."

Sakura hugged herself to keep warm, but she was already shivering.
She silently cursed to herself that Gaara picked now to tell her everything…

"When he took me into the house he tried, but I pushed him away. So he got mad. He grabbed a knife and carved this into my forehead." Gaara said as she motioned towards his scar. "He told me it was the only love I was ever going to get."

Sakura pulled him into her tightly, rubbing his wet back to get some kind of warmth back into him.

"I know now that he was lying…"

"Yes he was Gaara…everything he ever told you was a lie."

"Sakura…" Gaara whispered into her ear.

Sakura turned her head into his slightly to let him know that she was listening.

"I'd break the back of love for you." he whispered.

Sakura suddenly embraced the rain since it hid the silent tears that slid down her face.
She hugged him into her closer and together they stood as the cold winter storm raged around them.