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Chapter 10

Spock is working (read hiding) in the labs as he had done for everyday since he had kissed Jim. He had continued to do double and triple shifts ever since and made sure that he hasn't gone any where near the mess or the rec rooms and taking his meals in his quarters (when he remember or feels it is safe to leave the labs) all to keep away from Jim. He was suffering more than anyone could understand and that was before the problems had started. His mind was crying out to be joined with Jim's, he had to stand by as Jim was injured on away missions which he wasn't allowed on so he couldn't protect Jim, he had to watch as Jim flirted with ambassadors and other guests they had carried across space. His emotions were constantly waging war in side of his mind, his cool demeanour so close to cracking with emotions so violent that he had only felt them twice in his life and both had involved his mother (one when he was twelve and broke a child's nose for insulting his mother and the other when she had died), guilt and love were to be his undoing it seems but the pain of the blocked bond threatened to completely destroy him.

Spock is completely emotionally and physically exhausted, he's trying so hard to be the perfect First Officer but most of his duties involve spending time with Jim, so to make it easier for Jim he writes short summaries on the first page of a long winded report, makes sure that when ever he has bridge duty on the shift before Jim he always leaves a few minutes early only handing over the conn to someone who has been trained for command and makes sure that he does most of Jim's paperwork so that Jim has more free time to spend with his friends.

Spock is so grateful that Jim is no longer living in the captains quarters because he is certain that he would not be able to stay away. The most challenging times for Spock are when Jim comes down for an impromptu inspection of the labs because Spock fears he would not be able to keep his hands off of Jim and then his father will have to bail him out of trouble again. Fortunately Dr McCoy will send him a message telling him to leave just before Jim arrives, not that McCoy is doing it for Spock in fact McCoy has threatened him on various occasions to stay away from Jim or else.

The rest of the crew have clearly taken Jim's side (not that Spock blames them, if had been anyone else h would have killed them), they have shown their support of Jim in multiple imaginative ways such as; someone has deleted all the Vulcan and vegetarian meals from the replicators although when he had no choice but to walk past the mess hall he can see people eating vegetarian meals and every time he uploads a code for a meal it will delete itself after one use. The climate controls in his room are always breaking and being set to below freezing but when he tries to repair it (engineering is always busy) it is broken again within an hour, any important experiments are destroyed and the data lost so he has to repeat a lot of experiments two or three times and added to this any reports he requests always mysteriously vanish or are lost in the system.

Spock wonders whether he should just leave the ship but he quashes that thought almost immediately, no matter how bad his life is at the moment he is at least near to Jim.

Spock is brought out of his musings by a message coming through on his PADD; it is from McCoy and it is telling him to get out of the labs because Jim is on his way. Spock grabs up all the information he needs and turns to leave but standing in the doorway and blocking his way out is Jim. But it cant be Jim, Jim would never willingly enter a room which has Spock in it so this must be an apparition, but it is the most beautiful and golden sight he has ever seen. It cannot be human. The apparition takes a step forward, almost nervously.

"Hello Spock."

When it speaks, it's voice is like honey and chocolate so sweet and smooth so intoxicating. All Spock's senses immediately go into overload, sound, sight, smell; the scent that this being is giving off smells like all of Spock's dreams so familiar and yet so foreign. His fingers are tingling desperate to touch every inch of this... this angel. His lips wish to taste and worship every part of Jim. Spock takes a step back to try and clear his mind but even that is screaming to reach out and touch.

Jim enters the room completely and the door closes behind him. Spock breaks out of his stupor and realises that is indeed the captain.