Chapter Nine: My Life Would Suck Without You Now

The next few weeks were amazing. I had the most fun that I had ever had with anyone in a very, very long time. Sue became like a second mother to me. Seth was my best friend, and I blurted that out to him as soon as I had thought of it.

"Seth," I stated. I had no idea what

"Hmm?" he asked me. We were sitting at my table at home working on a thousand piece puzzle like old people at a nursing home because Sue had a doctor's appointment in Port Angeles and I didn't want to go over to Sue's by ourselves. He was working on his second corner and was trying to find the middle piece.

"You're my best friend, you know that right?" I blurted unthinkingly, and then I was suddenly embarrassed. How could I tell him that? I hadn't told him everything (how could I, he would think that I was absolutely nuts and send me to a home), but he was the person that I spent the most time with. And I think about him constantly, especially at school. I always wonder what it would be like if he went to my school. I would have more fun, certainly.

"Are you serious?" he asked me, a grin slowly making its way across his face.

"Like your BFFL or just your BFF?" he asked, making his voice unnaturally high.

I couldn't help it. I beamed. "Both," I told him.

"Okay, good, just making sure that we're on the same page here. Because just to let you know, your mine too."

I smiled again. "Awesome," I told him as I handed him the piece I figured he was looking for. I didn't know. They all looked the same to me, and besides this was his idea, not mine.

Sometimes Seth left Sue and me alone, not very often, but whenever he did, it was for a very long time, and I usually didn't get to see him before he came home.

I asked him once where he went and he answered me very vaguely. "I had to go to work," he told me, and there was a look in his eyes that told me that he wasn't going to say anything more.

I worked on Sue once, thinking that she of all people would tell me, but her answer was just a vague. "He's at work," she told me while we were chopping up the vegetables that were going to be Sue's and mine supper, seeing as I eat with them all the time whenever my mom's not home.

"Oh," I said, "What does he do, exactly?" I asked, poorly concealing the curiosity in my voice.

"Can you hand me the thyme that is in the cupboard right above your head?" she asked me before she answered. "He works in… security I guess you could say."

"For what?" I asked. I was growing frustrated. Why couldn't they just answer the damn question already?

"For La Push," she answered as she stirred. "Now, will you go outside and hand me some potatoes please. We don't have any inside the house."

It was getting strange… but I wasn't looking that much into it. I was sure that he would tell me eventually. And if he didn't tell, Sue probably would too.

I mean, how much could be hidden in La Push, a tiny Indian reservation on the coast of Washington? Nothing too big, considering the fact that there are only 900 people living here now.

I asked him once what happened that day he saved me from that bus.

"Easy, I saved you, and when you passed out I took you to mom. You know, she was once a nurse."

"Really?" I asked, distracted. But that wasn't the point. "Look Seth, I mean when you saved me. How did you get there so fast? That's what I'm worried about here. I don't really care right now that your mom was once a nurse, no matter how cool that is."

"You think it's cool that my mom was a nurse? That's kind of weird."

"That is not the issue here Seth! Stop trying to play me off. I'm not fucking stupid. Now; WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?" Honestly I was getting frustrated. I was not getting lied to, especially not by him.

"I had an adrenaline rush, okay? There's no need to yell Sophie."

Yes there was, actually. Whenever I Googled it (because that's what you do whenever you don't know what something that somebody important tells you.) it didn't say anything about being able to move fast, and everything. It doesn't make sense, but oh well.

For some reason, I didn't believe him fully, even though I was sure that he hasn't lied to me. I get feelings about people when they lie, but I was pretty sure he didn't lie to me. There was just something he wasn't telling me…

My mother only asked about where I was all of the time, and I answered her infrequently. Seth got aggravated at me for that, in the beginning anyway. But once I explained to him everything and after a while he changed his mind.

"How do you live with your mother like that? You barley get to see her, and when you do, it isn't for more that a day or two? I couldn't live without my mother for a week."

Neither could I (about his mom, not my own), but I wasn't about to tell him that.

"AW! Mama's boy, aren't we? But yeah, I don't know if she ever really wanted me anyway. It isn't that big of a deal. It wasn't always like this, but it has been for the past five or six years, and I'm okay with it now."

"Oh," was all he said and he turned away.

"My mom got pregnant with me in high school and she and my dad were in love, right? Well once she figured out that she was pregnant with me, she told him, which was a smart move. I mean, you don't tell teenage boys stuff like that ever. They can't deal with it. Anyway, he booked it once she started to show, after promising that he'd stay with her through everything. I think she kind of blames me for that, but I can't be sure.

"So yeah, if by some off chance she sees you and starts to talk about using protection, don't mind her, okay? It's not like it's the first time that I've had a guy over before. She gives them all the same talk, so don't feel like special."

"Wait… whoa, okay back up here. You've had other guys here?" he asked, his hands put up into defense mode in front of his chest.

It surprised me how hard it was to answer his question about the matter. Well harder than anyone else anyways.

"Yes," I told him, ashamed. I wasn't going to lie to him.

"Have you slept with a guy before?" he asked. Damn! Why did he have to keep asking all of these questions?

"Yes," I told him with a fake laugh, "I mean it's not like I'm in the first grade anymore. I mean you've had to have slept with a girl by know. I mean, you're like nineteen aren't you?" I asked him hoping seriously that he was going to say yes. I didn't want to be the only one.

"Eighteen and three quarters, thank you very much. Anyway, no I haven't actually. I'm saving it for marriage."

Oh. That's so… sweet. How odd that I think that now of all times, especially since I didn't wait…

But the only reason that I even started doing all that stuff was because of Peter. (God, its amazing how much it still hurts to think his name, even though it hurts considerably less now that I have Seth here with me. Instead of a razor blade all I feel is an unpleasant throbbing). After he died I needed to fine some way to cope or else I would have gone partially insane. I found another guy named Tony who was really sweet to me, and I thought he really liked me. I didn't love him, (far from it actually) but I still cared about him. I wanted him to like me, anyways. So I got close to him, and then BAM! He asked me to have sex with him, and I agreed. I don't remember much about it, except for the fact that it hurt a lot, and I cried. But other than that, nothing, I probably mentally blocked it.

I'm so glad that I found Seth, or better yet he found me. I don't know what I would do without him. In the past few years he is the most decent guy that I have met. He really is my best friend, and if I had met him even when I was with Peter I still would have tried at least to be his friend. I do wonder why he spends all his time on me when he could easily have a girlfriend. I asked him about it once, but he didn't say much.

"I think you're really cool too," was all that he said.

"But don't you have a girlfriend or something?" I asked, pressing him. There was no way that a guy like him was single.

"No, I don't really like anyone right now, actually." I was astonished that this hurt me as much as it seemed to.

"What about you," he asked, "don't you have a boyfriend?"

I laughed with a mirthless laugh. "No, actually. Maybe I'll tell you why later, but not tonight, okay?" And I would. Soon.

I hoped.

A/N: The part about Sue being a nurse actually is true, look it up on Stephenie Meyer's website. And yes, I did get that line from the Twilight movie. :) I didn't Google adrenaline rush either, if you can tell. I didn't have time. And I'm sorry that this felt like a filler chapter. I mean, it kind of was, but I really need this story to speed up in time, I feel like it's going by so slow. And no, Seth wasn't lying when he said he didn't like anyone. He knows in his own weird imprinter way that all Sophie really needs right now is a friend. Anyway just thought I'd clear that up and, please review!

Love,

Dicey

P.S. Go read my new story out, it's called Breathe I know about .21% of you care, but I like it, and I would like your thoughts on it! It's Jacob and Renesmee! Once again, please review!