BPOV

I was surprised, to say the least, when Edward offered to take me home, but I wasn't stupid enough to let this opportunity pass. Of course, the fact that I had just embarrassed myself in front of his entire family also played a part in my eagerness to get out of there, but I would be lying if I said the idea of spending more time alone with Edward wasn't my number one reason for accepting his offer.

To tell the truth, I had never enjoyed being the center of attention in any way. And now, everybody was staring at me like they were expecting me to sprout horns or something. As Edward practically ran out of the kitchen, I took a deep breath and turned to Carlisle and Esme. "Um, thank you, for everything." Then I glanced at Alice. "Alice, I'll talk to you later?" She just nodded, looking at me with large eyes.

I forced myself to walk out of the room, slowly, instead of running, carefully putting one foot in front of the other, so I wouldn't fall down. As soon as I was out of everyone's sight, I practically flew up the stairs to get my stuff, hoping that Edward wouldn't get tired of waiting for me. Then I left the house as calmly as I could, resisting the urge to bounce up and down and giggle, like a crazy person.

Maybe I could blame my irrational behavior on my traumatic experience in the kitchen. After all, I did lose consciousness for a couple of minutes.

Ugh!

Why did I have to remind myself about how I passed out - in front of Edward - like a little old lady from the fifties? I mean, seriously, who the hell actually fainted these days?

Double ugh!

I found Edward out on the front porch, pacing back and forth while he was smoking a cigarette. He tensed up briefly when he saw me, but quickly covered up and raised an eyebrow. "Ready to go?" I merely nodded, not trusting my voice at the moment, so he tossed the half smoked cigarette to the ground, crushed it under his boot, and headed for the silver Volvo parked in the driveway.

I followed him without a word.

Instead of simply jumping into the drivers seat, like I had expected, Edward stepped over to the passenger side and held the door open for me to enter. My eyes widened slightly, but I wisely chose not to make any comments. However, the annoying voice inside my head was squealing with delight.

Gorgeous, and a gentleman!

Careful, Bella, I firmly told myself. There's a lot more to him than that, and you know it.

So I settled for giving him a grateful smile, mumbled a soft 'thank you', and quietly slipped into the passenger seat, waiting for Edward to close the door, walk around the car and get in.

After I had given Edward the directions to my house, he backed the car out of the driveway, and I felt my heart beating wildly in my chest. This was it. Edward and I were alone; there was just the two of us, in his car. For the next ten minutes or so, he would have no choice but to make conversation with me.

Or so I thought.

When we got out on the main road, Edward still hadn't said a word, and I started to get a sinking feeling in my stomach. Why wasn't he saying anything? Did he regret offering to give me a ride home? As he just kept driving in silence, I let out a defeated sigh and slumped back into my seat.

My sigh must have caught his attention, because he finally threw a glance in my direction. "What's wrong?"

I gave him an incredulous look. Was he serious? Edward just looked at me, blankly, so I shook my head in irritation. "You tell me."

He turned his attention back to the road. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Sure you don't," I muttered, sarcastically.

Things were definitely not going the way I had hoped. Frustrated about Edward's behavior - not to mention the fact that I was still starving, since I hadn't gotten the chance to finish my breakfast before I left - it was safe to say that my patience was quickly running out. "You know what? Since this was obviously a mistake, why don't you just stop the car? I can walk the rest of the way."

"What?" Edward turned to look at me, his face a mixture of hurt and disbelief. "If you think getting into the car with me was a fucking mistake, why the hell did you agree in the first place?"

"No, that's not what I meant." I spoke slowly, determined to keep my voice calm. "You're clearly the one who thinks this is a mistake, not me."

I could see how his expression changed. Suddenly, he looked angry. "So, you're an expert on my fucking thoughts, now? What, you can read my mind?"

"No." I glared at him. "But I wish I could. Then I might be able to talk to you without constantly being afraid of accidentally saying something that will make you snap at me!"

I watched how his face fell. "Is that how you feel?" He spoke in an uncertain voice, once again turning away from me.

"Sometimes," I admitted. When he didn't say anything else, I bit my lip. "Could you please pull over for a moment?"

His hands only gripped tighter around the steering wheel. "Why?"

"Because you're going a little too fast, and it's making me anxious." I blinked away a few tears. It was only half the truth, though. I also wanted to be able to talk to Edward without him using the traffic as an excuse to avoid looking at me, but I wasn't about to tell him that.

I let out the breath I had been holding when Edward finally took his foot off the gas, causing the car to slow down. Then, much to my surprise, he actually pulled the car over to the side of the road and stopped. "Sorry," he mumbled.

"It's okay. Thank you for stopping." I swallowed. For a moment, we both just sat there in silence. Then I glanced at him. "So you're not having second thoughts about taking me home?"

The startled expression on his face reminded me of a dear caught in the headlights. Although, to his credit, he looked straight at me when he finally responded. "No."

Well, that was a relief. I managed a small smile. "Good." Hesitating for a moment, I then went on, "So, friends, then?"

Edward just looked at me, then quickly averted his eyes. I could tell that he was feeling uncomfortable, although I couldn't figure out why. I suddenly realized it was always like this with Edward; one tiny step forward, and two steps back. And it was really starting to bother me. I was tired of constantly having to walk on eggshells around him, when I didn't even understand why.

So, I decided to just stop beating around the bush, once and for all.

I shifted a little in my seat, so I could look at him without having to turn my head. "Listen, Edward, I know we haven't known each other very long, but..." I felt my cheeks flush, much to my dismay. But I forced myself to go on. "I kinda like being around you. I like talking to you. And I..." I lowered my eyes as I finished, "...need to know if you feel the same way."

He was silent for so long, I feared that he simply wouldn't answer. But I couldn't take my words back, even if I wanted to. I had to know.

Finally he spoke up, almost too quietly for me to hear, "I do."

"Thank God!" I was unable to keep the relief out of my voice. Normally, I would have been embarrassed, but for once, I didn't care. So I hadn't just been imagining things. There really was something there. So what if I didn't understand it. Edward felt it too.

Now, seeing how he watched me with an almost curious look on his face, I forced myself to calm down. "I mean, that's good, right?" Edward mumbled something I couldn't make out. I took a deep breath. "Can't we just... hang out?"

He frowned, suddenly finding something very interesting on the floor below his seat. "I don't 'hang out'," he finally muttered.

"Well, you could." I didn't want to let Edward's discouraging words put a damper on my mood; the guy had just admitted that he liked my company. Maybe not in that many words, but still. "You could hang out with me." When all I got in response was silence, I shoved my hands down into the pockets of my jacket. "If you want to," I finished weakly, once again feeling self-conscious.

"Why?" My eyes shot up to meet his, and I suppose he must have seen my crestfallen expression, because he hurried on, "I mean, why would you wanna do that?" Seeing my confusion, he added, "Hang out with me."

I stared at him, not sure what he meant. "Why wouldn't I?"

"Bella, you don't know me. I'm not..." He let out a sigh, obviously having a hard time to find the right words, and I could tell that he was starting to become frustrated. "Look, I'm not the type of guy you'd wanna be friends with." I opened my mouth to object, but he cut me off, "I'm bad, all right?"

Swallowing, I shook my head, slowly. "Who told you that?"

"What?" Edward stared at me, his face a mixture of confusion and alarm.

I held his gaze, refusing to look away. "Who made you think you're bad?" When he didn't answer, just kept looking at me, I reached out to put my hand on his arm. "Edward?"

He snatched his arm away, and I felt like screaming as he scooted backwards until he had backed up against the door, as far away from me as he could possibly get inside of the car. "I told you; don't fucking touch me!" His voice was trembling, slightly.

"I'm not gonna hurt you, dammit!" I cried, beyond frustrated. Edward just continued watching me, his face blank. I inhaled, shakily, silently counting to five before I went on, "Edward, listen to me. Whoever told you that was wrong, or lying. You're not bad."

Edward let out a bitter laugh, then turned the car key around and started the engine. "You don't fucking know me," he muttered as he maneuvered the car back into the traffic.

My hands gripped at the seat when Edward stepped on the gas, but I remained silent, trying not to panic. A part of me was relieved when he pulled up outside my house a couple of minutes later and turned off the engine. Another part didn't want to leave the car until I had gotten some answers. And more importantly; fixed whatever I had done wrong.

I glanced at Edward. He seemed a little calmer, but he kept looking straight ahead through the windscreen, refusing to meet my eyes, and I started to suspect that he simply waited for me to get out of the car. I stubbornly remained in my seat. For almost a minute, we just sat there, both waiting for the other to make a move. Finally he let out a sigh, closing his eyes for a moment.

"Why won't you leave?" He spoke in a low voice, and I got the feeling he wasn't just talking about leaving the car.

"I don't want to," I admitted, quietly. Then I lowered my eyes. "And I don't think you really want me to, either." I held my breath, wondering if I had stepped over the line.

"It doesn't matter what I want," Edward whispered, almost like he was talking to himself.

I frowned. "Of course it does. Why would you say that?"

"Bella..." Edward clenched his fists, then patted his pockets, and it took a moment before I realized he was looking for his cigarettes. "I don't know what you want from me," he admitted, clearly frustrated.

My hands were itching to reach out to him, take his hand and hold it between mine. But I wasn't that stupid. "I just wanna be your friend." That wasn't the whole truth, of course, but I knew I had to start somewhere. Right now, I would gladly settle for just being his friend.

That was, if he would let me.

My heart sank when he shook his head, although somewhat hesitantly. "It's better if we're not."

"Better for who?" I demanded, incredulously. "Maybe you should've thought of that before you offered to give me a ride home! Before you had to be all... sweet, and dazzling me by holding the door open for me!"

Okay, I realized I was being irrational. But I was also desperate.

Now he stared at me like I had gone crazy. I couldn't blame him. "I dazzle you?! What the fuck does that even mean?" I opened my mouth, but he wasn't finished. "Look, I said it's better if we're not friends. I didn't say..." He mumbled something.

"What?" I suddenly didn't dare to look at him.

It was Edward's turn to take a deep breath. He kept his head down as he repeated his words, quietly, "I didn't say I don't want to."

All of the sudden, my hands were shaking. "What does that mean?" I managed to whisper.

He slowly raised his head. "It means that I'm tired of trying to stay away from you."

I felt light-headed, like I was going to pass out again. "Then don't." He didn't respond, and I worried my bottom lip between my teeth. "I should probably get inside." I paused. "Do you wanna come in?"

Edward gave me a somewhat startled look, then shook his head. "I can't."

"Okay." I swallowed, struggled with the seat belt and prayed that he wouldn't hear the disappointment in my voice.

"It's not you, all right?" Edward ran his hand through his hair, almost nervously. "I just..." He hesitated. "There's something I have to do."

"Right. Yeah." I waved my hand in dismissal. "You don't have to explain. I understand."

He watched me closely, like he was trying to figure out if he had upset me. I suddenly didn't know whether to laugh or cry. As I opened the door, I cast a final look at him over my shoulder. "You know, if you want, you could stop by when you're done with... whatever it is you're gonna do."

Seeing the uncomfortable look on his face, I shook my head, deciding to stop humiliating myself like this. "Or I'll just see you at school on Monday. Whatever. Thanks for the ride." With that, I practically flew out the car, closing the door behind me before he would get a chance to stop me.

Or, in all honesty, I was more afraid to find that he wouldn't try to stop me.

A moment later, the Volvo was gone, along with Edward. And I instantly felt like a part of myself was missing.

Charlie was sitting by the table, drinking coffee and reading the morning paper. He looked up when I entered the room. "You're home early," he stated.

I frowned. "Sorry. I could leave again if you want."

He lowered the paper, a surprised - and somewhat hurt - look on his face. "That's not what I meant."

"I know, Dad. I was just kidding." I went over to the fridge and looked inside, hoping to find something edible. Picking up an apple, I noted that I would have to do some grocery shopping within the next couple of days.

"Oh." Charlie was quiet for a moment before he cleared his throat. "I had a friend of mine looking at your truck. He managed to fix it temporarily, but he said you should probably take it to the workshop and have a real mechanic take a look at it." He paused. "You know, if you want a vehicle that is a bit more... reliable, I'll be happy to help you find something. If it's about money, I could-"

I sighed, because this was not the first time we were having this conversation. "Thanks, Dad, but that won't be necessary. I like my truck, and I have no intention of replacing it any time soon."

Charlie didn't look pleased. "Well, it's not exactly safe," he muttered. "If it keeps breaking down-"

"Dad, my mom gave me that truck, and I'm keeping it." I cut him off, the tone of my voice leaving no room for discussion. Charlie looked a little taken aback, but wisely nodded in acceptance. I took a bite of my apple, hoping that he would change the subject.

He did, much to my relief. "So, did you have a good time with Alice?"

I nodded, putting on a strained smile. "Yeah. It was great. And their house is amazing." I hesitated a little. "Dad, how well do you know the Cullen's?"

"Why?" He looked a little suspicious.

"Oh, I'm just curious." I shrugged in an attempt to act nonchalant.

Charlie got up and walked over to the sink with his empty cup, rinsing it briefly before putting it upside-down in the dish stand. "The Cullen's are good people. Carlisle is a brilliant surgeon; we're lucky to have him. Apparently, aside from the two months he spent working at the hospital in Chicago a few years back, he hasn't had a day off in all the years he's been working here."

I was a little surprised; Charlie usually wasn't much for making speeches. "Carlisle seems really nice. Esme too."

"They are." Charlie nodded in confirmation. "And as for the kids, well, they've never given me any trouble, which is more than I can say for the children of some folks who have lived in this town for generations."

I raised an eyebrow. "So they're not originally from around here? That explains why I don't remember them." I used to spend the summers here in Forks as a kid. But that was a long time ago.

"No, they used to live somewhere in Alaska before they moved down to Forks," Charlie explained. "But I wouldn't call them new folks; they have been living here for almost ten years now." A pause. "Well, except for the youngest boy, of course. Edward."

"Right." I bit my lip, wondering how much Charlie knew. "I heard he's adopted."

He nodded. "That's right." I waited for him to elaborate, but - to my disappointment - he didn't. Instead he just looked at his watch and mumbled something about a basketball game on TV. Then he hurried out of the room, leaving me with more questions than ever.

What happened to Edward before he was adopted by the Cullen's? What was up with his never-ending mood swings? Why had he told me that he was tired of trying to stay away from me, when in the next moment, he couldn't get away fast enough.

Would I ever get any answers to my questions?