Nick stared up at the silver pipes twisting above his head in what to some people would be a confusing maze, but what to him was nothing more than the undercarriage of a car. He knew this as well as the back of his hand. He'd been around cars all of his life, having an uncle and a cousin own a repair shop and Jason being a car buff. But Nick wasn't as concerned with what he was looking at as he should have been. He just laid there under the car, his greasy hands resting on his chest as it slowly moved up and down as he breathed around the flashlight in his mouth, lighting up the pipes above him.

Nick couldn't get the fight with Warrick from two days before out of his mind. That had put into perspective how things were now. It hadn't just suddenly changed, but up to that point Nick had been able to ignore the fact that his friends didn't trust him anymore and that he was a totally different person. He hadn't paid any mind to it until Warrick had rolled up his sleeve and stared at him with that look in his eyes. Nick wished more than anything that he could explain to Warrick and everyone else what he was trying to accomplish, but that was impossible seeing as how he couldn't even explain it to himself. He wanted them to understand that he was doing what he was doing for a reason, but in all honesty he had lost sight of that himself and now he didn't know what to think or do about anything anymore.

Deep down, Nick knew that he good intentions and wasn't committing crimes and whatnot because he enjoyed it. He was trying to help the FBI and himself at the same time, even though that seemed like an impossible task. He felt so lost and confused, not knowing what he wanted anymore or who he was. He felt like he was watching a TV show about the same guy with two different story lines with their own writers and plot twists dictating his life. He didn't know which way was up, and even if he did, he knew he'd still be falling down.

Nick was jolted from his thoughts when strong hands clamped down around his legs that were sticking out from under the Mercedes he was laying under. Before he had time to react, he was being pulled forward, rolling out from under the car on the dolley he had been laying on for over an hour. Once he was completely out from under the car, Nick was able to look up at the man who had pulled him out.

The flashlight dropped out of his mouth when Nick looked up and saw Jason looking down at him. He was dressed similar to Nick; in jeans and a t-shirt, but he wasn't covered in grease like his younger brother was. Jason extended his hand and Nick took it, allowing the other man to pull him to his feet. Jason smiled and took the rag off the hood of the car and wiped his hand before pushing it into Nick, who took it without taking his eyes off of Jason.

"You shouldn't leave that dirty thing on such a sweet car," Jason said, nodding to the Mercedes. "I'd be lying if I said I thought you could afford this."

"I can't," Nick said, then quickly shook his head. "I mean I can. It's not mine though, I'm just looking at it for a friend."

Jason nodded slightly. "A pretty rich friend."

The tone of his voice and what he had said gave away everything that Jason was thinking and feeling at that moment. Nick wished he hadn't picked up on it so he could try and talk his way around this whole oncoming ordeal, but he knew that those efforts would be futile and a total waste of time.

"Why are you here?" Nick asked.

Jason smiled slightly and held up his hands. "That's the greeting I get? Not, 'hey man, great to see ya'?"

Nick sighed. "Sorry, I'm just surprised. Why didn't you call?"

"Because I didn't want to end up having to do this over the phone," Jason replied.

Nick felt his heart leap into his throat. "Do what?" he asked, knowing all too well what Jason meant.

Jason didn't answer. Instead, he went over to the door at the back of the garage and opened it, going into the kitchen of his brother's house. Nick followed him into the house, but went left when Jason went right into the living room. Nick went into his bedroom and grabbed some clothes before heading into the bathroom and quickly getting into the shower. Jason sat down heavily on the couch when he heard the water turn on and stared down at the floor as if he were somehow memerized by it.

Nick frantically scrubbed the grease from his body, trying to distract himself from the reason Jason was sitting in his living room right now. This was the last thing Nick had ever wanted to deal with, but he should have known better and handled it sooner rather than putting it off for it to sneak up on him like this. His heart was racing against his ribcage as he threw his clean jeans and maroon t-shirt before going back out into the living room and sitting across from Jason on the recliner.

Jason looked up at Nick with a blank expression that turned to sad as he said, "I know Nicky."

Nick shook his head, playing dumb. "Know what?"

"Don't make me say it," Jason said, running his hands through his hair.

Nick remembered the first time Catherine met Jason and he had done that, ran his hand through his hair, that Catherine had commmented on how Nick always does the same thing and how much it makes them look alike. Sitting across from him now, Nick realized that they do have a lot of the same mannerisms, but that had nothing to do with genetics and everything to do with what Jason was talking about.

"Say what?" Nick asked, still hoping that he was wrong and Jason was here for another reason and that neither of them would ever have to say 'it'.

Jason dropped his hands to his side. "That you're not really my brother. That's what."

Nick dropped his eyes away from Jason's. "Oh, that," he said softly.

"Yeah, that," Jason said, making Nick look back up at him. "But that's not even the worst part."

"Then what is?"

"The fact that you couldn't talk to me about it. For some reason, you never felt inclined to pick up the damn phone and call me to talk about it when you should have. Why didn't you?"

Nick swallowed hard. "I don't know," he lied.

Jason called him on that lie. "Bullshit. It's because you thought I wouldn't treat you the same. You thought that just because we're not genetically related that I wouldn't love you anymore, even though you were my little brother for thirty-six years."

"Techinally it was only thirty," Nick said.

"Whatever," Jason said as he stood up from the couch. "It doesn't matter to me. It doesn't change anything. It doesn't matter now, just like it didn't matter then."

Jason walked out of the living room and into the kitchen, not able to contain himself. Nick sat in the chair, shell shocked, for a few moments before following Jason into the kitchen.

"When?" he asked to Jason's back. "It didn't matter when?"

Jason turned around, a mixed-emotion expression on his face. "When you were younger I guess, I don't know. It never mattered that you weren't my real brother."

Nick felt a wave of shock rush over him. "You knew?"

Jason nodded. "No one knew I did, I pretended I didn't. I didn't care that you weren't my real brother by blood because you were at heart. You are at heart. It's not gonna change that I care about you. Does it change that about me for you? Is that why you couldn't talk to me about it?"

Nick shook his head quickly. "No, of course not. I just thought that if you knew I wasn't your brother and that my real father-"

Jason cut him off. "Is a criminal? That doesn't matter either. That didn't matter, not until you let it."

"I didn't let anything happen, this isn't my fault," Nick said weakly.

"It's not your fault that you're a criminal now? That you lie to your friends, who don't even know you anymore? It's not your fault that I can't even look at you right now without feeling sick to my stomach at what you've become?"

Nick felt like someone was slowly clawing his heart out of his chest. "Who told you?"

"Kelsey," Jason answered, referencing their older sister, who just so happened to have become best friends with Catherine over the years. "But don't try to pass the blame off on anyone, they're just the messengers. This is all on you."

Nick shook his head. "You don't even know what's going on. I'm doing it to help."

"It was like that at first, now no one knows what you're doing. I bet you don't even know what you're doing."

Nick sagged his shoulders in defeat and looked down at the tile floor beneath his feet. He felt like at that exact moment, everything that had happened over the last however many weeks was suddenly piled on his back, forcing him to bear an overwhelming weight. He wished that there was a way to shake it all off and make it all go away. But it was much more likely that the weight would crush him and bury him beneath the floor he was standing on.

"But that's still not the worst part," Jason continued, regaining Nick's attention. "The worst part is that you didn't come to me with this huge problem when you knew damn well you could have. That's what I'm here for. Or is that Mike guy a better big brother than me?"

Nick could barely hear Jason over his heartbeat pumping through his ears. "No, that's not it."

"Then what is it? Just because your last name isn't really Stokes, that erases everything? Does a stupid fucking last name change thirty years of your life? Does it?"

Nick couldn't answer. All he could do was stand there and listen, so Jason went on.

"It shouldn't for you because it doesn't for me. If I had to go back and re-do those years, knowing you weren't my blood brother, I wouldn't do one single thing differently. I would still beat up our punk neighbor that stole your bike. I would still yell at those guys in high school who thought they could mess with you just because you were younger and better at baseball than them. I would still yell at your for getting drunk when you were only sixteen, but thank God that you called me instead of trying to drive home. And I would still worry about you all the time because you risk your life for other people and know that someday you might not be here anymore because regardless of your last name, your my little brother Nicky," jason said, his voice starting out angry and slowly fading into a quiet whisper at his last five words.

"It doesn't say anything," Nick said, his voice weak and distant seeming. "I know I should have came to you with this, but I was so scared about everything and didn't want to have to think that you're not my real brother because that's not fair. It's not fair to me to know that the person who's looked out for me my whole life...technically isn't even my brother. But I don't care, I was just worried you were. I'd rather lie to myself and everyone else, pretending you're my real brother than nothing at all."

Jason walked over to Nick and firmly put his hands on his shoulders. "Listen to me man. You've fucked up in your life before, and I never turned my back on you. You've done some pretty stupid things, but you know that you can always count on me. This time is no different. You're still my little brother, genetics be damned. I don't care how stupid or scary or illegal it is. You're still my little brother."