Chapter Ten: or White Christmas
We finally hear from Peter.
Peter's Point of View
May your days be merry and bright
And may all your Christmases be white
Bing Crosby
Christmas at Hogwarts used to be my favorite time of the year. Now it's merely another annoyance until I finally can get away from these people I call my friends. They haven't been my friends for years now…it just took me a long time to realize it. These days I have different friends. For years and years I've been kidding myself. Trying to believe that they really could like me for who I am…was. But I was wrong they don't care, never did care.
But that doesn't matter. I've found new friends, better friends. They care about me. They think I'm special, different, and talented. They see me for what I'm worth. They don't treat me like a rat. With them I feel right…so completely right. As luck would have it my dear "friends" have decided it's absolutely necessary to stay at Hogwarts for Christmas this year. This would prove to be very annoying. I have to meet up with the Slytherins over the break so I'm going to have to get creative in thinking up some new excuses.
The entire castle seemed to be in a festive mood. Everyone seemed determined to celebrate the stupid holiday. At meal times I was forced to stare at several Christmas trees as I tried to eat my meal. In the hallway I was unlucky enough to be constantly surrounded by the suits of armor singing seriously out of tune Christmas Carols. Everywhere I went my stupid friends seemed to find it necessary to have an impromptu snowball fight. I always wound up losing somehow. I hated it and my friends thought I was a downright scrooge.
"Pete let's pelt those Slytherins with icicles!" Sirius exclaimed as we were on the way to Herbology.
"I'd really rather not," I told him.
"C'mon. It will be fun. A prank with a Christmas twist," he'd said the same thing about every single one of his winter-related prank ideas.
"Padfoot, no," I repeated stubbornly.
"What's got your knickers in a twist?" he asked irritably.
"Nothing. I just don't feel like it ok?" I responded equally as irritated. Sirius just sent me a funny look before running up to try and persuade Kristen and Emily to join him in his childish antics.
"Jingle Bells Snivellous Smells," Sirius began the infamous song.
"Slughorn ate an egg!" James bellowed at the top of his lungs.
"McGonagall had a fall," Remus chimed in. The three of them looked at me expectantly. I just smiled back.
"Pete—?" James asked hesitantly.
"What?" I answered.
"Aren't you going to finish the song?" Sirius wondered.
"Nah I don't really feel like it," I shrugged.
"Peter I never feel like it. But its tradition," Remus informed me.
"Things change," I told them with another shrug.
"Kristen come here!" Sirius exclaimed suddenly. Kristen, his girlfriend, who'd been sitting in the common room with Lily doing homework, looked up in surprise.
"Where's the fire?" she asked jokingly.
"We need you to finish the song," James told her seriously.
"Peter bailed on us," Remus told her.
"It's important," Sirius urged. I watched as Kristen looked at me in shock. Everyone knew about our favorite holiday song. We sang it every year as we walked through the hallways; our parts where always the same. But this year I wasn't taking any of that crap. She knew the words—just like everyone else and so she joined in.
"And Dumbledore did ballet," she sang festively.
"Hey!" the four of them shouted happily. The awkward moment I had caused was instantly forgotten as she took my place in the song. My friends eventually realized that I wanted no place in their Christmas festivities this year. Kristen took my place in the Jingle Bell Quartet. The boys went to Caroline if they needed somebody to help them prank the Slytherins. Lily took up my part in the annual common room decorating day. Emily, much to her chagrin, got saddled with my role in the impromptu snowball fights. And just like that they'd forgotten about me. It was that easy. I therefore felt no regret when I attended the meeting that night.
"Peter," Lucious Malfoy's voice came out of the darkness. "It's so good to have you here again."
"Likewise" I replied. The first time I'd attended one of these gatherings was the night Sirius and Kristen got together. As soon as she became part of Sirius's life it was like they had no room for me anymore. James was already preoccupied with Lily. And I didn't mind that. He'd had his heart set on her for ages so I was truly happy when she finally came around. But Kristen on the other hand, she didn't deserve to be with Sirius. She wasn't any better than anyone else. She was just a common slag, Sirius's flavor of the week. Well that's what I had thought anyway.
But then we all found out that he was actually serious about her. He actually cared about her and it made me sick. She wasn't worth it. No girl was. Now not only was James always with Lily but Kristen always seemed to be around. When she was in the room Sirius and James needn't bother asking my opinion ever. It was always "Kristen what do you think about this?" or "Hey Kris wouldn't it be funny if we did this?" They used to come to me with their ideas but now it was Kristen, Kristen, Kristen.
And that's when I realized. They'd never really cared about my opinion. They just needed somebody's input, anybody's input. And when somebody better came along, they abandoned me. It wasn't like they did it consciously. It was a slow and gradual process. And once Emily came along it was all very apparent. Now Remus too, had someone else. They really didn't need me anymore; Peter, the odd man out, the seventh wheel.
Anyways, the night that Sirius and Kristen got together I left the common room, unnoticed and upset. I was walking through the hallways just trying to collect my thoughts when Severus Snape came up to me.
"Pettigrew," he said nodding his head at me. I instantly drew my wand from my robe-pockets. Snape never passed up an opportunity to hex me.
"Snivellous," I acknowledged trying to appear calm.
"You can put your wand away. I'm not going to hex you," Snape said laughing at me. I just glared at him. Sirius and James told me never to trust Snape, so I didn't. "Fine don't put it away. I don't care. I only came here to deliver a message to you."
"You have a message for me?" I asked suspiciously.
"Yes, it's all very odd," Snape said rolling his eyes. "If you want a way to get back at them go to the 2nd floor bathroom at ten tonight." At first I had no idea what Snape was talking about.
"What the bloody hell is that supposed to mean Snivellous?" I asked angrily. "Is this some sort of trap. A set-up? Lure the unsuspecting Gryffindor into the bathroom so you can hex him into tomorrow? If it is I don't buy it." Snape just laughed at me. His calm demeanor was really starting to bother me.
"No Pettigrew. It's not a trap or a set-up. It's a peace offering. If you want a way to get back at them go to the 2nd floor bathroom at ten tonight," Snape repeated the message as if maybe it would make more sense the second time. It didn't.
"Snape I have no idea what you're talking about," I told him shaking my head. As I said this James and Lily came out of the portrait hole laughing and holding hands. They were headed to the kitchens. Snape and I ducked behind a tapestry so that they wouldn't see us. I could practically feel the immense hatred and dislike for the Gryffindors radiating off of Snape.
"Don't you?" Snape asked me imploringly. And then I understood. He was offering me a way to get back at those gits I call my friends.
"2nd floor bathroom?" I asked him.
"Ten tonight. Don't be late," he hissed at me and then left. At the time I had no idea what I'd just gotten myself into. Now, three meetings later, I was slowly becoming one of them. I don't know what to call them exactly. In my head I always refer to them as the Slytherins. But that's not all they are. There are some students who've already graduated and some who were in Hufflepuff I thought. Nobody even bothered to tell me that they were the followers of the Dark Lord until the last meeting. However, I simply refused to believe that these guys, my new friends, could be Death Eaters.
What we did was innocent enough. Whenever a meeting was called a group of us met by the 2nd floor bathroom at ten o'clock at night. We took turns disillusioning each other and then we snuck out to the forbidden forest. We just talked and plotted and hung out. It wasn't until last meeting that instead of going to the forbidden forest we snuck into Hogsmeade.
Lucious Malfoy, a seventh year, led the way. He brought us through the grounds, down a tunnel, and we came up through a manhole on the streets of Hogsmeade. We followed him to a more secluded part of the town. He stopped at the entrance to the Hogs Head. Several wizards, all cloaked in black, came out and met with us. Then the group wondered over to the mountainous part of the village and got settled in the closest cave. The older wizards pulled back their hoods and I recognized some of them as the Death Eaters in the newspapers.
"This is quite the turn-out," a voice said happily. It came from the man I would soon learn to be Rodolphus Lestrange.
"It's all thanks to Snape," Lucious said smirking. Snape had apparently been recruiting followers, for the lack of a better word. Gathering misfits and bringing them to the group; just like he had done with me. It was then that I first realized the type of situation I'd become involved in. These were Voldemort's followers. They practiced Dark Magic, hated muggles and muggle-borns, and they killed people. This was getting a little out of hand. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, a stone. Snape shot a look at me.
I tuned the rest of the conversation out. Instead I thought about the number of excuses I could give for not wanting to be a part of this. Yes, I wanted to get back at my friends for being complete prats but I didn't want to get involved with dark magic! This was not part of the plan. I was a Gryffindor for crying out loud! I still don't know what they were talking about that day but on the walk back to the castle Snape came up to me.
"You feeling alright Pettigrew?" he asked warily.
"I'm fine. I was just thinking that maybe this isn't the right thing for me after all," I told him nervously.
"You're backing out?!" Snape asked me incredulously.
"Well I didn't know that you guys were Death Eaters," I said defensively.
"We're not. You don't see a dark mark on me do you?" Snape responded.
"But those guys were," I replied.
"We're just doing them a favor. We're not Death Eaters Peter, we're just sympathetic to their cause," Snape explained.
"Well I'm not," I told him stubbornly.
"Yes you are," Snape said firmly. I was taken aback by his reply.
"I don't understand," I tried to protest.
"You're either with us or against us Peter. From here on out its black or white. There's no gray area in this case. You're either one of us," Snape said motioning to the group of people I'd come to call my friends. "Or one of them," Snape pointed to Gryffindor tower as he said this.
"But I'm in Gryffindor," I replied.
"Says the sorting hat," Snape replied rolling his eyes.
"I can't just not be in Gryffindor anymore," I told him.
"I know that. But you're heart is in Slytherin now—isn't it?" Snape asked. "You don't need the sorting hat to tell you who your friends are do you?" I shook my head at this. Snape was my friend. James, Sirius, and Remus, they were just the idiots who used me whenever they felt like it.
"Well then why do you guys still want me to pretend to be friends with the gits?" I asked irritably.
"Because one day you're going to get your chance to get revenge on them. But the plan won't work if they don't trust you. So until it's decided otherwise you need to keep their trust and pretend to be their friend. As long as you know who your real friends are we don't have anything to worry about," Snape explained. His logic was flawless so I listened to him. I trusted Snape. So now, as I met up with the usual crowd I was feeling sure of my place amongst them. After the meeting with the Death Eaters, Lucious and some of the older guys were worried I wouldn't come back. But there I was, ready and willing. So this time, as the meeting went on I actually paid attention. Mostly they were just gossiping about the latest killings and which pureblood family was the most influential at the moment.
Even as I looked around me at the faces of these people, Slytherins, near strangers, I still felt more welcome than I had back at Gryffindor tower. And I knew that I was making the right decision. I would stick with them even if they did grow up to become Death Eaters. Because they valued my friendship. Unlike the bloody bleeding heart Gryffindors I forced myself to be friendly with. This Christmas holiday I was forced to endure the company of the shallow Gryffindors I now hated. I plastered a smile on my face as Sirius, James, and Remus each opened the presents I'd gotten them. Snape had advised me to get them good presents even though I hated them. I had to keep their trust. I was feeling generous so I even joined in singing Jingle Bells on the way downstairs. Besides, if I acted like I hated them for extended amounts of time they might actually grow some brains and realize something was wrong.
After the holiday feast instead of joining the Gryffindors back in the common room for roasting marshmallows and Merlin knows what other stupid forms of festive entertainment, I snuck down into the dungeons and listened as Snape gave me the latest information about what the Slytherins were up to. I'd much rather be freezing my butt off in the dungeons with Snape than singing stupidly sweet Christmas Carols with James. Times have definitely changed.
Author's Note: Sorry this chapter was so short. I don't really enjoy writing from Peter's perspective…but it was necessary. He's in a very dark place and I don't enjoy going there to write about him haha. Anyways this chapter was mostly filler and a glimpse into Peter's mind. Please leave a review!
yellow 14: loved your review as always! Haha unfortunately this chapter wasn't as sweet…and either are the next few.
ATTENTION CHARLIE WEASLEY FANS! Here is an excerpt from the new story I'm working on. It's not even a chapter long but I like it.
"Shit!" Charlie was never going to play with that Chinese Fireball ever again. Jamaya, the newest dragon to come to the reserve was a rather temperamental Chinese Fireball. Everyone hated her but Charlie had just thought she was misunderstood. He went out of his way to be nice to her; to play with her. And what did he get? A huge, very painful, burn down his entire left arm. Jamaya was officially evil.
"That's what you get when you play with Fireballs," Reese said barely concealing a smirk. Melissa Reese is the main healer on the reserve. She is a big, burly woman in her early fifties and she knows her medicine. She is always constantly yelling at Charlie whenever he does anything rash. Which, needless to say, is most of the time.
"She was lonely," Charlie protested. He winced as Reese applied a green salve to his arm.
"That's just what she wants you to think. Personally, I'd stay away from that one," Reese warned.
"You say that about all of them," Charlie reminded her.
"You would say the same thing if you have my years of treating dragon inflicted injuries," Reese reasoned.
"And yet you're still around," Charlie said with a grin.
"Well someone has to take care of you idiots," Reese joked. Charlie's laugh turned into a grunt of pain when the salve finally started taking action. The green paste had suddenly turned bright blue and his arm ached.
"What in the name of Merlin are you doing to me?!" he demanded to know. "This is not how you usually heal a burn!"
"I know I know," Reese said looking irritated. "It's some new fangled way that Graham is making us try." Reese rolled her eyes as she said this. Steven Graham is the healer in charge down on the reservation. He is always experimenting with new healing techniques that usually don't work. He's a nice guy but his always happy disposition was always bothering the other healers. He never gets mad or panics…not even in a crisis.
"Well it doesn't bloody work!" Charlie growled. His arm was in a serious amount of pain.
"Suck it up Weasley," Reese said as he glared at her. "If this works right that burn will be gone by tomorrow."
"And if it doesn't?" Charlie asked. Reese just shrugged her shoulders. "Brilliant," Charlie remarked sarcastically.
"This isn't my fault," she said defensively. "Quit playing with dragons and you won't have this problem."
"Never," Charlie replied with a grin. Reese just rolled her eyes at him.
"If you don't start to think while you're on the job you're going to be out of commission much sooner than you'd like," Reese said with a gentleness that had been absent in their previous discussion. Sometimes Reese gets a little maternal with the dragon tamers.
"It looks like we might all be out of commission a lot sooner than we'd like," Jake Henderson said walking into the infirmary. Jake Henderson is Charlie's best friend on the reservation. They were partners in training and stayed close afterwards.
"What?" Charlie asked in surprise. Reese whipped around in shock and stared at Jake open-mouthed. As much as she complained about the tamers and their injuries she lived for her job. She loved it. Jake just shook his head and sat down. Reese kicked the chair right out from under him.
"Speak Henderson," she ordered. Jake glared at her as he picked up his chair.
"They're sending the committee here," Jake said glumly.
"The committee? What committee?" Charlie wanted to know.
"The Department for Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures," Reese sighed.
"They're saying that there are too many dragons in the area and they want to cut back one reserve," Jake told them.
"What?!" Charlie and Reese exclaimed at the same time.
"Three representatives are supposed to arrive tomorrow around noon. They are staying here for two months to inspect and write a report," Jake explained.
"And they're picking us?" Charlie wanted to know.
"Not necessarily," Reese said with a hint of desperation in her voice.
"The Department is sending out five different teams to five different reservations," Jake revealed.
"How do you know all this?" Charlie asked his friend.
"I was filling out some paperwork about that Ridgeback and I overheard Wentworth and Michaels talking about it," Jake revealed. Eric Wentworth and Colin Michaels were tamers a couple years higher up than Jake and Charlie. So naturally Eric and Colin were privy to a lot more information.
"I can't believe they're going to try and shut us down," Charlie groaned. "And my arm hurts. Today sucks."
"Today does suck," Jake agreed with a sigh.
"Would you two quit acting like hormonal teenagers?!" Reese exclaimed. Both boys looked at her in surprise. "We are one of the best reservations on the continent! They are not shutting us down. When those representatives come here they'll see that we're the best and they won't be able to shut us down."
"Why is Charlie's arm blue?" Jake asked.
"Failed experiment," Charlie shrugged.
"Oh yeah, we're the best," Jake said sarcastically. Reese shot a glare at him. She looked like she wanted to kick the chair right out from under him again. "What?" Jake asked defensively.
"We're the best but you guys have to believe that if those representatives are going to," Reese instructed. Jake looked a little taken aback but Charlie just smiled.
"You think my arm will still be blue tomorrow?" he asked her. Reese just looked at it before letting out a deep sigh.
"Screw Graham," she said applying the old-school salve. Charlie felt an instant relief as the salve cooled his arm. It was still blue but it didn't hurt anymore. He smiled up at Reese appreciatively but she just frowned at him.
"You two better get your acts together," she scolded.
"Yes mum," Jake called out to her as he dragged Charlie out of the infirmary.
Once they were out of her earshot Jake began to talk to Charlie in a rapid hushed tone. "So they're sending three representatives," he began.
"Do we know who they are?" Charlie asked.
"I heard its two guys and a girl. They're not too high up in the Department but high up enough to definitely influence the decision. Anyway, they're supposed to get here tomorrow afternoon. They're staying a month," Jake told Charlie.
"You've said all this already," Charlie pointed out.
"I know I know I'm just trying to remember what I left out before. Oh right, Schmidt is assigning one of us to each of them. We have to show them around and make them think this place is great and all of that," Jake informed him.
"Which is going to be impossible," Charlie pointed out.
"Not impossible…just really hard," Jake sighed.
"C'mon Jake there's a reason those guys work for that Department," Charlie insisted. It was somewhat of an unwritten rule that anyone who worked for the Department for Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures either loved or hated magical creatures. It was about a fifty-fifty chance that the reps they got would hate magical creatures.
"I know we've had bad experiences with Department Representatives in the past but maybe it will be different this time," Jake mused. Charlie shook his head. They both knew that it would not be different this time around. They were only kidding themselves if they thought otherwise.
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