Chapter 10
Waking up the next morning, I'm in bed alone. I get up and head to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee and hear Happy on the phone. "Shit...Yeah...Okay...I'll be there soon." he tells the person on the phone. He turns to see me standing there and I ask "What's wrong?" giving him the benefit of the doubt. He runs his hand down his face and says "Chick at the clubhouse brought a kid. Said he's mine." he tells me. "How old is he?" I ask. "Three months." he tells me. "Let's get a paternity test done and go from there." I tell him but don't look at him. I head towards the bedroom and he grabs my hand. I pull away and say "Just get dressed." before heading to the closet to get dressed myself.
Pulling up to the hospital, Venus is holding the baby when we walk in. Happy goes back to do his part of the test and the woman is sitting there with the carrier in the floor and she won't even look at him. Happy comes back out and sits next to me. He tries to hold my hand and I pull away. "I need some air." I say before getting up and heading out. "I got her." Tig says and follows me out.
I sit on the bench outside and just look down at my hands. "Talk to me Doll." Tig says as he sits down. "He tells me he wants to try for a kid. We should have already had one but that got shot all to hell and now he may have a kid with someone else. I don't know if I can handle that. Hell, she won't even look at the baby. He didn't ask for this." I say. "I know but Happy fucked up and now he might have a kid. Is that going to make you walk away?" he asks. "I don't know. Part of me thinks I should take it as a sign that shit won't change but then again, another part of me thinks that his kid or not, that baby needs parents that love him and will take care of him. She has him in a carrier with nothing but a diaper on and won't even look at him." I tell him. "What are you going to do?" he asks. I look at Tig and ask "If the baby is his, I'll help Happy raise him. But if he's not, would I be completely insane for offering to adopt him just so he has someone that gives a shit?" I ask. "No Doll you wouldn't be. You're an amazing woman. You'll be an even more amazing mom." he tells me. "You know, we're trying for a kid." I tell him. "That's great sweetheart." he tells me. We sit there for a couple of minutes and I say "You know, you've been good to me Tig. You and Quinn both. It feels good to have some brothers to turn to." I tell him and he hugs me.
We head back inside and I sit down next to Happy. I look at him and ask "Can we talk?" He nods and we head for the hallway. "Where's your head at on this?" I ask. "If he's mine, I'll take care of him. Get what he needs." he says. "If he's not?" I ask. "What are you thinking?" he asks instead of answering. "If he's yours, I'll help you raise him but I adopt him and he will be mine. You can tell by looking at her that she doesn't give a shit about him." I tell him. He lets out the breath he was holding and pulls me close but I pull away a little. "What is it?" he asks. "If he's not yours, would you be opposed to adopting him anyway? He needs parents that love him and will be there for him and she's not going to do that." I tell him. "Is that what you want?" he asks. "Yeah but…" I start but he stops me. "If that's what you want, that's what we'll do." I look at him and he says "I want a big family babe." I nod and he kisses me softly. "The doctor is looking for you Hap." Quinn says as he slowly walks up to us. Happy looks at me and I say "Let's see what they say."
We head to the office and she's sitting next to us. "According to the results, this baby is your child." the doctor says. "I'll give you all a minute." he says before leaving the room. "What are you wanting?" Happy asks. "For you to take him. I can't be his mom." she tells him and pushes the carrier over towards us. "What's his name?" I ask. "Charles Victor Lowman. I call him Charlie." she says. "Follow us to the clubhouse. We'll get the lawyer to draw up the papers to sign over your rights and my wife wants to adopt him." he tells her and she nods.
Once we get the papers signed, she looks at me and says "He deserves better than this and I can't be a mom." I nod and say "This means you don't get to know anything about him. That what you want?" I ask. "I just want him taken care of and I don't want to be the one to do it." she tells me. "I'll take care of him." I say and she nods before walking out. Venus walks over and says "Well, let's take Charlie and go do some shopping and get what he needs." I nod and Happy says "We'll take the truck and the guys will help me set everything up." Charlie starts to cry so I pick him up and hold him close and he immediately stops crying. "I got you sweet boy. Mommy's got you." I tell him and he snuggles into me.
After shopping, the nursery is set up and I am sitting in the rocking chair, feeding Charlie. Happy stands at the door, watching us. "That's a good look on you." he says softly. I don't look up at him and I don't speak. I just continue rocking him and feeding him. Happy walks over and kneels in front of me. "Talk to me babe." he says. "You have a son." I say softly. "I'm sorry babe." he tells me. "Do you ever wonder if the baby we lost was a boy or a girl?" I ask. "Sometimes." he says. I finally look at him and say "No more surprises, okay? I don't know if I can handle any more." He kisses me softly and says "Okay." before looking down at the sleeping baby in my arms. "Thank you." he says and I just nod.
After laying Charlie in his crib, I walk out to the back deck to get some air. Happy walks out and sits next to me and I reach over and take his hand. "I love you Happy." I say. "I love you too babe." he says before kissing my knuckles. "I still want to try for a baby but no matter what, he's our son." I tell him. "Anything you want little girl." he says. I look up at him and say "Till the Reaper comes." He smiles softly and says "Till the Reaper baby." before pulling me to sit between his legs on the steps and just holds me close while we listen to Charlie's little snores through the monitor.