Chapter 10: Past; Present; Future
Last Time:
I was definitely ready and excited for my eternity with Edward, yet somehow… I could tell that the perfection of this moment was not all that was to come in the future. It's sad…how the only question that comes to mind now instead of 'What kinds of things can Edward and I do now, that couldn't be done before?' is 'How am I going to just up and leave everything I thought I previously knew?'
Now:
His lips continued to press roughly against mine while his fingers twirled carelessly through my hair, ruffling it and smoothing it out occasionally. It all caught me off guard- I always imagined our first real kiss to be like this but could never actually tell myself how it would feel. My brain used to whisper words like 'it probably won't ever happen' and 'you aren't like him; he's a vampire'.
Those lines were merely memories now. None of it was true, I was able to fell my arms wrap limply around his neck and press my lips again after taking a momentary breather. I knew it was wrong to overexert myself after resting –though in agony- for three straight days, but I wasn't going to deprive myself of something I knew my body was waiting for all my life.
Not what you're thinking.
What my body's been aching for all this time, is to be kissed so deeply that I'd able to feel the love of the man doing this rush throughout my body.
That man –whom I'll love forever- is Edward.
I tilt my head slowly, allowing myself to look just like the couples' in movies that kiss and kiss until their heads bob like a bobble head gone haywire. It was amazing to me how there was not one ounce of love he held back, it was all coming at me in a single instant, wishing to consume me into his unresponsive heart.
I slide my cooling hands slowly up his neck and twist his short hair loosely around a couple of my fingers as I eagerly kissed him back.
Sudden jolts of energy thrust throughout my body, making me yank away from Edward's lips in the most abrupt way possible. My lips tremble slightly, wishing to be pressed up against Edward's again, but instead I look down quickly, aware of Jasper staring at us, his hand pressed against the wall as he leans against it.
He sighs and looks down, "Sorry to bother you…" Jasper's voice was calm, but repressed, "But Carlisle said to get you Edward. He wants all of us away from Bella for the time being, so that we won't have to lie as much when questioned about her disappearance…well…death," he finishes smoothly, not entirely bothered by the fact that he walked in on us.
I watched as Edward reluctantly nodded and grabbed my hand gently, and then squeezed it as if to tell me that he'll be back down as soon as he's allowed. I nodded to him, giving him my 'okay' though it probably wouldn't have mattered if I said okay or no.
I pulled myself as slowly as possible to a weak looking bed in the corner of the basement. It looks as if it's been brought to every place they've moved to, and from its old-fashion looks, it was probably Carlisle's bed from who knows how long ago. I forced my body into a comfortable position on the bed and fixed my head up a little so that it rested nicely on a fluffy pillow.
"So…I'm going to just… up and disappear so that no one in Forks can learn about my sudden change. I've always been this pale…well not this pale, but just about," my voice reverberated throughout the room just slightly as I spoke to myself about the days to come. I reached up and brushed my fingers across my teeth as if to feel fangs, though I knew full well that vampires don't really have fangs at all.
"I'll leave behind Charlie… my mother…" I pause for a second and continue on, "Jacob… and all of my other friends. I'd even leave behind the school I finally became accustomed to," I stopped myself again and moved my hands up to rub my eyes to find that the tears I thought were about to come didn't. And never would.
After being in Forks for a relatively long time, I never thought about going anywhere else. This dreary, wet place became my home quite quickly, not entirely replacing the things; I sort of missed when I lived with my mom. I slide my fingers slowly in between each of them, over and over again, trying to rub away the tingling sensation slashing at my nerves.
Then I felt something rattle in my mind; something I should have thought of first rather then coming up with what I'm going to miss. Where do they even plan on taking me when they go through their 'moving' process? Are they going to bring me to Alaska or something? Or somewhere where it possibly rains more then it does here in Forks?
"I don't honestly think that's possible…" I whisper under my breath, before closing my eyes as to let my thoughts over run me like an unstoppable force.
-Edwards POV-
The door shut behind me with Jasper's unneeded help and I allowed myself to go into the living where so many incidents have occurred. The utter chaos that's to come from uprooting our lives again are sure to stress out everyone, even Jasper who'll be constantly on alert to keep us relatively under control.
"How do you expect me to act as if Bella died? What's the story we're using? Do you want me to go to school pale? Well that shouldn't be too hard!" My voice was unnaturally loud and it was partially caused by the pain I previously caused Bella. However, the reaction I give them wasn't unexpected; Alice already notified them of my upcoming outburst, so I merely continue. "Did she run away? Get kidnapped? How am I going to go to school…we can't shed tears! I'm going to look like a heartless boyfriend, if any of you haven't realized yet!" I didn't raise my voice any further, nor did I continue speaking, I just stood and waited for someone to speak.
After a moment, I felt Jasper pressing against my emotions, suppressing them to rid me of my anger and irritation. It's easy to notice, but I remained silent, wondering what else they may be gauging about my appearance. I must have looked terrible…even for a vampire.
Carlisle took a seat on one of the coaches in our living room and looked directly at me, staring deeply into my eyes with a look of compassion that instantly calmed me without Jasper's help. I could never disappoint Carlisle again… especially after what happened just days before.
"Edward… after Bella is officially announced missing and pronounced… dead… we're going to move to Labrador City, Newfoundland, Canada," he declared calmly, looking at me as if expecting some quick reaction to make him recoil or something. "As for the story we're using as the 'cover-up', I guess you can say," He continued, "There was a landslide while you were on your camping trip and she was only caught in it because she insisted on staying at the camp while you went fishing for your dinner." He sighed, clearly as distraught by the events as I was. "You won't look heartless… just be quiet. Be more to yourself then normal and if asked about Bella's death be as solemn as you possibly can, that's all I can possibly advise, Edward."
"Alice, you're going to have to be the same way. Although, I can safely assume you'll be very good at it, seeing as how you'd have been upset if Bella died under any circumstances," Carlisle said gently, directing his intention away from me and to Alice. She smiles and laughs, nodding because of how right he was.
I advanced a little closer to Carlisle, looking down the entire time as a form of apology. "Where is this place? Labrador City, Canada?" I asked, curious to learn a little more about the location, rather then looking it up.
"It's quite a cloudy and rainy place. Not as good a cover as Forks, but sufferable nonetheless," he responded, pulling himself to his feet and headed off to his office room.
I glanced at the rest of my family and whispered, "Should I… go downstairs and inform Bella? I'm sure she'd want to know where we plan on mov-," I began but got cut off instantly by Emmett.
"Don't you remember? We can't come in any contact with Bella other then feeding her. We have to get the feeling that she is actually gone, Edward. I'm sure you can last a week or so without being near her," he stated firmly, his voice as loud and deep as ever. There was no mistaking it was Emmett.
Last a week or more without being near her? How terribly wrong he was…
I ignored the comment, though acknowledged it mentally, and headed up stairs, as far away from the basement as possible. I dropped myself onto my bed and stared up at the ceiling, wondering what I could possible do for a week or two. The rage continued to build up inside my lifeless inner body, though I also kept it under control to the point where I didn't storm downstairs all the way to the basement, beg Bella for forgiveness, tell her where we're going to go, and what the story of her death is. Of course, that would be too reckless and I didn't allow myself to do such a thing.
"Labrador City, Canada?" I sighed calming myself a little. After shaking my head a couple of times, I brought my subconscious to a memory to a place back when I didn't even know Bella existed. Back to before she came here. Instantly, I felt my body soothe over and I focused on her thoughts. There was always a barricade in Bella's thoughts, but as I made the attempt for the first time since I'd changed her, I found
myself reading my own thoughts, completely unable to make the try anymore. There was a second, larger barricade surrounding the one that her human body once created.
"It…got enhanced…" my voice trembled slightly, though I'm not sure why I allow it to. Was it the fact that her power was even stronger then it once was that frightens me? The potential she may have can quite possibly be devastating. The barricade was strong enough to block me from this distance, but what would happen if I were right in front of her, trying to read her thoughts. If her power is as strong as it seems… the Volturi won't be able to locate her in a couple of months, when they're set to come. They won't be able to track her in any way because she has the ability to block all their powers. "So…when we move, we're safe from the Volturi. Completely safe from them finding us and everything…" I took a deep, unneeded breath, and rubbed my forehead, sitting up to stare at the door to my room, which was left open just a crack.
The door slid open inwardly as I stared at it and in came Alice. "Edward, do you mumble to yourself a lot? It's been a while since the last time you did this, and that was when Bella first moved down here and you were contemplating weather or not to kill her," her voice was cheerful enough, but clearly she was going to find her answers through whatever glimpses of the future she can conjure up that involve me.
Instantly, she sighed and shook her head, looking at me relatively disappointed. "Edward, the Volturi will find Bella, no matter what we do," at the sound of this, my eyes grew a little larger; obviously she had seen the Volturi confronting us on some level. I remained quiet and waited for her to continue. "You're forgetting that with their extra senses, they don't need to specifically track Bella. They can track us."
Of course my idea was dumb and had holes that I obviously overlooked, but she didn't really have to point it out, I would have discovered it for myself sooner or later. "We couldn't block everything like Bella can either. I really don't wish to be confronted or associated with them again; it was a big mistake when I went all the way there that time.
Alice smiled calmly without telling me the reason, she shut her eyes and turned around on her heel, exiting the room. I watched her until she closed the door and sighed yet again. "It's been only ten minutes and I feel like I'm about to suffocate from not being near her…" My thoughts were consumed by the entire event of changing her. The way it happened was the worst, it never should have happened like that. She didn't want it to be that painful. I almost couldn't stop myself. I nearly killed her, yet even after I've apologized countless times, I felt as if it will never be enough. There was no way to ever change what I'd done. That's why I always said she'd be damned for eternity. Leave it to Bella to be changed in a way that she'll never forget.
"I claim to love her… yet for the past year I've been the one to cause her the most pain," I shook my head and fell back on my bed, closing my eyes tight enough to block off any bit of light in my room.
-Bella's POV-
I could hardly see anything down in the basement; it was darker in some corners then in it was in others. Not even I was used to being all alone for this amount of time. A week plus may end up feeling like a month to me. I wasn't allowed to talk to anyone in the house or anything; it was like they were secluding me, yet it was for the benefit of all of us. My existence had to become nothing so that we could all just leave. "I guess the story of them leaving will be that there were too many memories of me for Edward to continue living here, knowing that he'll never be able to see me. I'm pretty sure that's it…" I whisper, recognizing that if I keep talking to myself like this I may go insane before they come and bust me out of here.
Slowly, I shove myself to my feet and walk over to a wall. It was completely translucent; on the other side was another staircase, which more then likely led to the back of the house for a quick exit. I let my fingers run across the wall and the feeling it gave off was strange. It felt just like a stone wall; yet it looked like glass. "Maybe… I just think it looks like glass because of my enhance eyesight or something?" I resolved a few minutes later after examining it a little further. There was no door to the other side of it.
My feet lead me to a desk where I sit at the chair and stare in sheer curiosity at the mounting papers and binders. Each one of the black, vinyl binders was filled with page protectors and those protectors all contained papers. Most were articles and documents, telling of how Carlisle was changed and such, mostly like a bunch of diary entries. It was strange to see them down here in the basement rather then in his office where all of his other memories are locked.
Out of boredom and curiosity –though mostly out of boredom- I sifted through the pages, slipped a page out, and read it quietly to myself. That wasn't anything special, so I returned it to its protector and flip all the way to the back to find a sheet of paper that had fresh writing on it; I could smell the graphite; it was nearly unbearable. I really had to get used to the whole advanced senses thing, and fast, otherwise I'll be covering my nose every minute of my life.
I slipped the sheet out of its protective covering and lied it flat down on the table. It was definitely Edward's handwriting, but in a much younger way and not necessarily neat at all. It was almost obviously a rush job. I noticed that it was not exactly fresh writing at all; I only recognized the scent this quickly because of the way it smelt just like Edward.
'I had a vision last night… I don't know why or how; maybe I was just seeing something when I was browsing Alice's thoughts, but I definitely saw myself biting a girl. She appears to be my age, but I've never seen her here yet in Forks… It could've been my imagination, but I swear she'll be coming in maybe five…six years, tops. I don't know what will make me bite her, assuming the person I saw is me, but still I feel as if I'll know her some how; as if the guilt is already growing inside me like a newly blossoming flower. I feel like I'm too old to be writing an entry into this binder, but Carlisle's told us that it's fine if we don't want to verbally voice our opinions, but if we instead put them in writing it'll allow us to get the feelings off our chest. Writing that is very insignificant but… biting someone, it's unheard of. The Cullens' don't feed on people, ever. Carlisle wouldn't permit something like that to ever occur; I don't remember him ever giving us an exception.
Is it possible we'll change somehow?
Will we convert to true vampires like the Volturi he's told us about?
I guess these things are pointless to talk about now, but for some reason it seems like this event in my future will mean much for me. It'll mean more then I'll ever have time to think of, for now, I'll ignore it. I'll forget this ever happened and pretend that girl doesn't truly exist. I don't have any hints as to who she is, so why try to figure it out?
Edward
I read this under my breath a couple of times and shook my head as to tell me exactly what it is I'm looking at. "Edward… saw himself change me before he ever really did it. Maybe… that's why he had so much trouble doing it in the first place? Is it because he didn't want what he saw to come true because it would mean that things he may have seen previously or afterward are a possibility?" I sighed and groaned under my breath, deeply annoying myself.
This must be what vampires do with their spare time. We probably just talk to ourselves over and over again to sort through our thoughts and memories for answers. Edward's confusion over everything must have been caused by flashbacks of the vision he saw. "I wouldn't blame him for acting the way he did; now that I've seen why… assuming what I read is why he was like that…" My voice was strangely calm and soothing, I didn't remember a time where I was actually able to listen to myself talk and have myself calmed by it.
-Edward's POV-
I heard Alice's voice ring throughout the house, smacking my ears like a bee stinging at someone's skin. She was shouting for me to come down, so, reluctantly, I obliged. My feet shuffle slowly down the stairs and I stop, seeing Alice looking at me with an urgent expression.
"Edward…you look terrible," and for some reason, beyond me at this moment, she smiled. "Good, good. Charlie's coming," her voice died off a little. As would mine if I had the privilege, of announcing this to everyone.
"When's he going to be here?" I ask, rubbing the back of my head a little to stretch.
Alice closed her eyes and sighed, "He'll be here in ten minutes. Edward, just look as distraught as you possibly can. We need to convince him that Bella's…," she pauses and groans, trying to rid herself of her sweet voice; she was already preparing herself to go into depression mode. "Dead." Her voice was flat as she muttered that final word.
How do I pretend that she's dead? How can anyone ever request me to do such a thing, its insane! No one could ask me to do that; it's as if I could imagine my life with her gone. When Charlie gets here I'm telling him that we have her in the basement, that she's getting her clothes ready to go home.
Those ten minutes were the quickest of my entire life. Alice opens the door, responding to the pounding on it and says, "H-Hello…" in a voice that depicted so much sadness that it would've made me gag if I planned on having Alice get angry with me.
"Where the hell is my daughter?" he roared, instantly annoyed, as if he didn't recognize that it was Alice standing in front of him.
I walked over to the door, and stood behind Alice. I could hear her thoughts and she was talking to me. Go on, Edward. Tell him that she tripped and fell off a cliff or something when you went hiking. I glared at her coldly, hoping that Charlie didn't notice and stared directly into his eyes. "I'm going to tell him, I don't care what everyone else wants, I'm speaking the truth," I told myself mentally.
"Charlie, she's…"
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That's Chapter 10… pretty cool right? Ha…. Now you're all probably gonna kill us cuz of the cliffhanger… right? Wrong! You know why you're wrong? Cuz if you kill us, who's gonna finish the story??? Your mom? Ha! I laugh at that!
So umm… (cough) yah… sorry! I'm super hyper! (laughs)
AGAIN---Hope you all enjoyed the chapter! Kyo wrote it all cuz I was way to busy with some projects for school, but I DID contribute ideas and criticism. )
Love to you all!! Have an awesome turkey day Thursday!
Love,
Suma Susaki
&
Kyo-k40-Sohma