Author's Note: Alright! This chapter is solely based on Negan's POV. I tried my best... LOL. Happy New Year everyone!

Things will get more heated in upcoming chapters! Get ready!

Negan's POV

Fuck. What was I thinking? How could I have kissed her? How could I have kissed another woman after…

After…

Lucille.

Your words stung. The look on you face was supposed to satisfy me, but it didn't. I couldn't help but feel guilty for hurting you, just how I hurt…

Lucille.

You wouldn't look at me, not even after barging into you room. You were curled up, just how you were that morning in the bathroom. I wanted to scoop you up into my arms and apologize, but I knew I couldn't. I had already crossed a damn line in the garden that night.

Fuck. Why did you have to bring me outside? Why did you have to see the good in such a terrible world?

I left your room. I couldn't bear to see you so hurt because of me. Usually, I wouldn't care, but it was different. You were different. You reminded me so much of…

…

Lucille.

Your strong will, the bravery and courage, how you wouldn't take shit from anyone… You weren't afraid of me and while it was bad for the reputation I was trying to uphold, it made me feel a bit more human.

I killed your friends and yet, you still chose me. You still decided that you would make a living in my Sanctuary.

I needed to release my anger somehow. Amber would be the perfect candidate to help with that. I still needed to send the message that she was mine and until that message sunk in, I was going to show her that she fucking belonged to me.

I walk into Amber's room. She was curled up in her bed. I knew she was still awake and I also knew that she was aware that I kissed a woman that wasn't one of my wives.

"Negan…" Amber says, tossing her blanket aside.

I feel myself getting hard to see that she had stripped herself from her clothes. She was hot, but she didn't compare to you. For now, though, Amber would do.

I was determined to make her scream, to make this bed rock hard against the wall so that you could hear the amount of pleasure that I was giving Amber.

Amber felt good, but she wasn't the person I wanted. The blonde tried kissing me… Tried putting her lips against mine. I slam into her before completely pulling out. It was enough for me to relax just a bit, but it didn't help that I had yelled out your name.

And oh did Amber take notice.

"Thank you, Amber. And whose pussy does that fucking belong to?" I ask her, buckling my pants and climbing off the bed.

"Y – Yours, Negan… I belong to you."

"Good. Let's fucking remind ourselves of that."

I leave her room without another thought. When I walk down the hallway to my room, I couldn't help but glance at your door. I wanted to walk in and apologize, but doing so after making one of my wives scream in pleasure didn't seem right.

How could I fucking have yelled your name out loud in the midst of fucking my wife?

Damn it. I needed to get a lid on my feelings.

I walk into my bedroom, glancing at the trays of food at the coffee table. I could feel my anger and blood boiling again. There was no way that I would get a sufficient amount of sleep tonight, especially not after the shit I said to you.

I didn't mean any of it. I was just angry. I didn't want you to go to another floor. I didn't want to hurt you, to embarrass you in front of my wives…

Fuck. I didn't mean any of it.

As I was getting ready for bed, Simon's voice was heard over the walkie talkie. Damn it. I couldn't get any silence here. None of these fuckers knew how to be responsible for themselves. How difficult was it to just do their damn job?

"What, Simon? Do you fucking realize how late it is?" I say through the walkie.

"I know, boss. I know. We've got a code red down here. The two fuckers on watch fell asleep, but the people at maintenance fucked up. There's a hole in the fence and from the looks of it, someone must have escaped."

I pull on my leather jacket and take Lucille. I didn't really want to do this shit so late at night, but this fucker who escaped needed to learn their lesson.

"And boss? It seems like the person who escaped either was a child or a woman. The footprints are to small that of to be a man."

No. No. No.

I walk out of my room. My heart is beating out of my chest. If I found your room empty, shit was surely going to go down.

I swing your door open, glancing around the empty room.

"Fuck." I tell myself. Your room was clean of your clothes and your bag was missing. You were definitely the one who escaped.

I walk out of your room, descending the stairs of the compound to go outside to the front gates. The two fuckers who fell asleep were going to get a little beating for not doing their job. When I see Simon, that damn grin was plastered on his face, like always.

"Gather up a few men, Simon. I think I have a fucking idea who ran away. As for you two sorry shits, you're both going to the cell. Tell D to bring these fuckers down there right now."

Simon instantly follows my orders which is something that I am grateful for. He really was my right-hand man and when I tell him to do something, he does it with no questions asked or little to no hesitation whatsoever. It was great.

Soon enough, Dwight emerges from the darkness with two other men, grabbing the two fuckers away from my sight.

"We leave as soon as you gather the men, Simon. If we waste any more time, the girl is going to have a few steps ahead of us and we don't fucking want that, do we?"

Simon tilts his head. I knew he had an idea of who left. When he walks over to me, I tighten my grasp around the end of Lucille.

"Hey, boss? It's the teacher, huh? The Alexandrian?"

I didn't want to acknowledge his question, but from the way he was staring at you, you knew he wouldn't go away anytime soon.

"Yeah. We're going to find her and when we do, I'll be the one to talk to her. Do I make myself fucking clear? No one touches her. She's mine and I will handle this situation as I see fit."

Simon doesn't respond.

It sure was going to be difficult to find you, but fuck, I'm going to my damn best.