Hello! Ohhh, i know you're going to hate me... Just don't kill me too much, particularly you .Dora, DissectingPomegranates and Fingirl... I'm biting my nails at this... Okkaaaiiii. *Deep Breath* Go read.

The room was bright and warm; Bond felt M's mouth on his neck, working slowly down to his collarbone. He moaned quietly and stroked her back and side as she worked her way back up the other side. Reaching his ear she gently tugged on his lobe, laughing as she kissed him full on the mouth.

He rolled them gently, trying not to break the kiss, he hovered over her so he could kiss her easily, their tongues duelled and M moaned into his mouth, taking control more and exploring the feel of him. She arched up to feel him pressed against her and moaned, squirming slightly. He lowered some of his weight and she hummed her approval, he latched onto her neck and savoured the taste of her. Her fingers danced down his spine and travelled around his hip, resting at the hem of his boxers. She nipped at him again and lifted a hand to run through his hair, before he could protest he felt her small hand slide into his boxers and take him in her grasp, with just enough pressure to make it difficult to breathe but not to the point of pain. His elbows buckled a little and he moved to her side so he could look at her properly, her eyes were alive and happy.

She began to move her hand and the shirt she wore so it fell open, Bond dipped his head to her breasts, nipping and teasing them until she released him and buried both hands in his hair. He began to move his hand down her body, to the hem of her panties, teasing her before drawing patterns up to her breasts again, he kissed her neck and collarbones while his hands played with her until she was yearning for more, he moved back to her underwear and watched as he moved them down her legs, once they were below her knees she kicked them away impatiently. He took her leg, just under the knee and lifted it so her foot was flat on the bed. He then slowly moved his hand down her thigh, tracing the skin in the same patterns he loved to use on her, he mirrored his hand on her other leg with little kisses. They both watched his hand as it reached her apex, he gently teased her, running his fingers along her entrance, building up the excitement and swirling his thumb over her clit, making her jerk and whine each time. She moaned and arched under him, moving her hips so she could feel more, he finally relented and slowly slipped a finger into her. She moaned him name loudly just as the door opened, Bond turned to see Greg there, leering over at them in a drunken state. Standing quickly Bond moved straight for him but Greg was quicker, hitting him square in the jaw he flung Bond into the chair in the corner of his room. As Bond stood again he watched Greg turn to M on the bed and backhand her across the face, her cry made Bond's blood boil and he tried to move but found his feet stuck, he tried to shout but his throat wouldn't work, he could do nothing.

With the more effort he made to move he felt the paralysing effect move up his body, until he couldn't move at all. He watched as Greg grip M's hair and pull her harshly up the bed so she was lying naked in the centre. Bond wanted her to hit back, to defend herself, to desperately fight to keep him away, but she lay there, sobbing quietly as she gripped the sheets in fearful anticipation of what was to come, her eyes found Bond's imploringly and it killed him not to be able to help.

Greg noticed where she was looking and grabbed her throat, pushing her into the mattress further, kissing her furiously while he groped her body brutally, he pushed off her and stood at the foot of the bed, when she curled to her side he forced to lie back down flat, completely vulnerable and humiliated. He was undoing his pants, kicking them off, pulling his shirt over his head. He turned over his shoulder, looking at Bond with a malicious smirk, before forcing himself back between M's legs and into her.

Bond woke abruptly; M's scream echoing in her ears. He moved M off him carefully but she awoken nonetheless. Bond kicked off the blanket and grabbed his dressing gown, moving down the hall to the living room without a word.

It wasn't that he didn't want to talk to M; he just didn't know what to say. His dream had been so vivid that he felt ashamed and disappointed that he hadn't done something to help. He also felt angry that M would have to return to that type of situation that evening, and Bond couldn't see how to convince her not to. He sat on the sofa and let out a long breath, letting his head fall back.

He heard quiet footsteps and knew she had stopped just clear of the hall, he felt her watching him and without opening his eyes, he beckoned towards her to join him. He listened to the floorboards and she moved beside him and sat down with him. She cuddled into his side, placing one hand on his neck and buried her face into the other side, silently supporting him through whatever he was going through, her finger stroking the line between where his law met his neck.

They sat like that for a few minutes until he turned his head to hers and kissed her sweetly,

'What happened?'

He shook his head and looked off towards the black TV, the silence in the room was deafening

'Do you know what time it is?'

'Just after 0400' she spoke quietly and affectionately to him, playing with the hair on the back of his neck, the silence came back heavier than before

'I had a dream' he said simply and she didn't push him, she just looked on into his face

'We were... You and I were in the bedroom… and Greg came in'

M tensed and felt suddenly sick, she knew these types of dreams, when even her sleep was tormented by his treatment, but she was horrified that Bond was also suffering with them.

'He... Shit' as he though back over it, he began to feel sick, he leant forward, holding one of her hands in his

'I got up, he swung for me and I fell, and I tried to move but I couldn't... It's like I was frozen.' He shook his head and he felt her small hand on his back reassuringly

'He hit you, He fucking backhanded you across the face and I couldn't stop it' he hand a ran a through his hair in frustration.

'He... Umm...' he felt back into the cushions and breathed in a shaky, angry breath

'It was a dream James' She said soothingly, touching his arm as he stood and shrugged her away

'No M, for me it's a dream, that's your fucking reality, that is what you handle day in, day out' he breathed deeply, trying to contain his anger as he made the plea he had held back over the last week.

'Do not go home to Him, stay here, permanently, grab your shit and leave, don't go back that fucking monster'

There was a deafening pause where they stared at eachother in the semi-darkness, he watched her, she looked as if she was weighing her options, he was sure he had her. Until,

'He's my Husband James' she said, quietly but firmly

'I don't fucking care!' he bellowed, making her jump and tears spring to her eyes

'I can't just leave' she said in a near whisper, pleading with her eyes for him to understand.

'Yes you can, clear out, come here, come Home. Send papers for divorce in the morning! You don't have to stay there'

'I do... He's my husband' she said louder, her decision being made

He grabbed her wrist and pulled her towards the bedroom, M's mind filled with so many other times she had been grabbed like this and what it usually entailed for her and she burst into tears. Bond pulled her all the way into the bathroom, standing her with her back to the large mirror, he lifted the shirt from her, tossing to the ground as he grabbed the shaving mirror.

'Look M, look at what your fucking Husband does to you!'

He shoved the small mirror into her face so she could see the blackened and bruised skin. Only then did he notice the fear, pain and hurt he had caused in her face.

He dropped the mirror to the floor and she flinched at what she expected would be shards of glass slicing into her skin but it never came. He tried to cup her cheek, but it made her flinch again, she tried to cover herself and shivered in the cold of the bathroom. She looked small and humiliated and he had never hated himself more.

He stepped back and offered her his dressing gown, when she took it with trembling hands he fell to the ground at her feet, locking his fingers together and putting them behind his head.

She pulled on the dressing gown and looked down at him, he looked utterly ashamed of himself. She had been scared; but as she looked at him she knew she wasn't scared of Him, merely of the memories He had reminded her of. He hadn't hurt her, he had just tried to prove a point. She let the tears fall anyway as the shock wore off, she stepped forward and pulled his head to her stomach, he began to murmur to her his apologies as he held her hips.

When her heart rate slowed enough for her to be able to talk, she lowered herself so she was she was kneeling in front of him

'It's okay, you were angry' he looked up to argue 'you would never hurt me; I know that' she said quietly.

'Still doesn't excuse it, I'm sorry, did it hurt?' his eyes were red and damp although no tears had yet actually escaped; he lifted her wrist and kissed it gently.

'No, it just surprised me and I was reminded of…'

'I acted like him today'

'You didn't, you were angry, we all get angry. You didn't hit me, you certainly didn't do anything worst, I was just surprised you grabbed me like that.'

'It was so rude of me, I didn't mean to pull and push you around' He closed his eyes and pushed hard with the palms of his hands against his temple

'You are nothing like him' she said sincerely, and when he looked up she kissed him to prove it,

'I'm sorry' He whispered against her lips, and kissed her with enough emotion to show he meant it

She reached for the shirt and took off his dressing gown, standing and turning to the mirror he had a view of all her bruises and scars across her back, he stood, but this time the anger had left him and only the concern remained.

'Please, please don't go back, come here, come Home, don't make me send you back, please' he pleaded to her in a restricted, hurt voice, hugging her tightly to him, making eye contact through the mirror.

'He'll kill me' she whispered, finally voicing the fear which kept her with him for so long.

'M, you run MI6!' Exasperation was now clear

'I cannot involve work, I will not have any of them thinking me incapable because of this, you know and you see me as weak'

'You are not weak! Nobody would see you as that but if you cannot leave him or kill him then let me!' The anger he felt towards Greg was growing again in his chest.

'No' her voice was quiet and scared but decided 'this is my life James, he is my husband… I will not involve you in this'

'I am involved' He said to her, stinging her with his gaze

She pulled away and left the bathroom and he heard her begin to dress, leaving Bond standing on the cold tiles. He stood still; angry, upset and disappointed. He listened to her moving around and thought over everything she had said, the more he listened to her movements, he began to feel a numb coldness begin to settle in him, not the kind just before a kill, that type he could control, use to his advantage. This was more like the numbness you feel when the innocence one dies or you find yourself in the torture cell. He walked into the bedroom and watched her as she fiddled in her handbag.

'You lied to me when you said you loved me' he said quietly, his voice void of any real emotion, watching as she dropped her bag on the floor in surprise.

'James, I didn't, I do lov...'

'No you don't. You had to have lied. You can't love me if you're going back to him'

'I'm not going back because I love him'

'Then why? Your marriage is over, you let him do this to you, it's like you believe you deserve to be punished and so you excuse his behaviour' she walked over and slapped him. Silent tears began cascading down her face, and her voice shook

'I do not let him! This isn't some purgatory, I have no choice!'

'I've offered you a choice, I offered you 3 choices and you don't want them' He didn't look at her, he couldn't

'I love you, James' She whispered

'Do not tell me you love me and then break my heart by going back to him' his voice was stony and cold.

She leant up and kissed his smarting cheek, he flinched but didn't pull fully away, standing with his hands braced by his side and shoulders tensed up.

'You're my guardian James, my savour..' she reached for his other cheek but he blocked her hand and moved away,

'I could have been, I wanted to. You didn't Want me'

With that he turned back into the bathroom and locked the door.

M was sure she was frozen to the spot if not for the heart hammering into her chest. She hadn't wanted this, hadn't wanted the fights it had brought about. She went to the wardrobe and pulled the bag out which she had filled with clothes and other items to leave at Bonds' flat less than 12hours before. She quickly and quietly emptied her drawers and the few items she had hung, replacing them with his blue shirt, the tears continuing thick and fast as she did. She turned to the door, there was so much she wanted to say to him but, she had a duty to Greg and she was sure one more plea from James and he'd have her.

Bond had slumped against the door and cradled his head, listening to the shuffling in the room next door, he hoped she would knock against the door but the room went silent and a few minutes later he heard the front door slam; M had gone. He sat there for a while, numb to everything surrounding him, he drifted off to sleep and woke with a crick in his neck.

He moved through to the bedroom, he first noticed her top drawer was slightly open and empty, he approached and checked them all; all were bare of all her possessions, and so was the wardrobe. M was gone for good. He noticed a small folded piece of paper on the chest beside door, picking it up he read her neat handwriting,

Darling,

I do love you,

I'm sorry,

G x

She left his flat quickly and called a taxi, she cried the entire journey home until by the time she actually arrived home she had nothing more to feel. She sent a quick message, asking for the car to be sent to her house at 0800hr. She pulled herself upstairs and crawled into the guest bed, she knew she couldn't face her own. She suffered a fitful couple of hours sleep with Bond words and Greg's actions plaguing her.

He ignored everyone for the rest of the day, and drank far too much.

He walked into the kitchen and spotted the tulips he had bought for her, the numbness subsided enough to allow a sharp pain to enter his heart. He picked up the vase and walked to the window, opening it he chucked the contest of it out, watching the colourful tulips and droplets of water land on the pavement below.

Although he tried to ignore it, he kept checking his phone. She didn't call. Both Moneypenny and Tanner had but Bond assumed M was merely sending them to do her business for her, and he wasn't settling for that. It buzzed around 1730 and he snatched it up, she'd sent him a text, of only four words.

'Forgive me, my love.'

He stared down at his phone, tempted to throw it against the wall, imagining the bitter satisfaction of listening to it smash.

She was going back to Him, to Hell.

He looked back at the boring show on the television, it had kept his drunken brain occupied but now even that wasn't distracting him from that morning's argument.

He pulled out his mobile again and pressed the speed dial,

'Hello, Jewels Precious Moments, How may we assist you?'

'Jewel, Bond'

M was staring out of her window, she had sent him the text over 15minutes ago and he hadn't responded, she couldn't stand him hating her. Biting her lip she thought to the night ahead, she had never been so scared to go home, or ever felt so totally alone. Part of her hated Bond for showing her how it could be, and stripping away the emotional barriers she had built against Greg's treatment. But the bigger, more logical part made her heart ache that she couldn't return to his loving embrace.

All she wanted was to go to Bond, but he had shown her she wasn't welcome there. She had thought about it all day, changed her mind back and forth a million times but she had to stand by her vows and return to Greg.

She picked up her coat and walked to the door. Moneypenny gave her a strange look,

'Ma'am are you sure you're alright? You haven't been yourself all day'

M tried to answer but felt tears prick her eyes, her smokescreen failing her as the burdens of her personal turmoil broke through, she looked down quickly but Eve had noticed and approached, standing close and placed a hand on her shoulder.

'What's wrong?'

She shook her head and faked a smile but Eve ignored it, instead she hugged her boss. M was shocked for a moment before clinging to the younger girl tightly.

'Thank you Eve' she said as they broke apart a little later.

'Anytime Ma'am' in a voice that made M think she meant it

She headed to the car quickly and let herself in before the driver even realised she was there.

'Good evening Ma'am' He said, surprised by her hurried behaviour

'Good evening Roy'

'Where to tonight?' he asked diplomatically, no one, besides James, knew as much about her personal life as Roy did. He was the most discreet man M knew and she made sure he was looked after well and above usual chauffeur, as his two boys at Eaton can attest.

The moment of truth, she took a deep breath

'The flat' she heard herself say, then realised what that meant, if she showed up at Bond's he wouldn't let her go and she wasn't sure she would have the strength to. But if she didn't go home then Greg would be worse when she did go home to him, and she would have to return some time, they all knew that.

Although the internal battle raged on she never redirected Roy and all to quickly they pulled had up at this flat. M hurried out and stepped onto the pavement looking up to his floor, the lights were on in the kitchen and, bedroom. M swallowed and took another step, feeling something snap beneath her shoe, she glanced down and was immediately hit with a tidal wave of tears. The tulips he'd picked out for her with less than 24 hours ago was now strew across the pavement.

She turned and climbed back into the car in a flurry,

'Ma'am?'

'Drive Roy, please' the tears were there again, she wasn't sure if she had managed a half an hour without them making an appearance that day.

Roy did exactly what he was told and grew no attention to his bosses emotional outpour in the back seat, he had to admit, to at least himself, he hadn't seen her this bad in a several years.

'Where to ma'am?' He asked again after an hour of driving aimlessly through London traffic, she had recovered from her tears now but her face was still stricken and gaunt.

She sighed and looked out of the window,

'Home'

He'd spoilt himself, he had two of Jewels most gorgeous girls on their way over and would be joining him for several hours and still his mind was on M. He'd made a coffee and tidied up, he couldn't help thinking what if she changed her mind, what if she came and he had company. He'd checked his phone again and again but he had nothing from her, his pride stopped him from calling, he knew he owed her an apology but she was so infuriating. He wanted her safe from harm, was that so much to ask for? But then he remembered how he had treated her that morning in the bathroom and he hated himself. He hated the look on her face and it made him sick that he put it there. There was a knock at his door, at least distraction was here.

They had been parked outside just shy of 10minutes and she hadn't gotten out the car. She was staring at the window where the television light flickered through the curtains.

'Ma'am, shall I take you back to the office?' Roy said, he knew that look of fear on her face and it normally resulted in a call the next morning telling him she was running late and then a deadly quiet journey.

'No.'

He didn't say anything more but looked out the window at the high-priced Kensington houses

'I won't be in tomorrow, so enjoy your weekend' She said as she opened the door and placed her feet on the pavement, she sat for a second longer then stood and shut the door

'Thank you M' He said quietly, looking to make sure she was okay, she looked at her house and then approached the driver window, which he nearly always had down if she wasn't in the car.

'Thank you Roy, you are very kind' her voice wavered towards the end and she looked away, down the street, before he could react she was standing on her porch steps. She stopped and turned, he thought she'd get back in, but she just waved him away, watching as he drove away. She turned and froze again, she pulled the phone out of her pocket and looked down at it, she clicked Bond's name before cutting the call, shoving her phone in her pocket.

She walked up the stairs and opened the front door, her whole body was shaking.

She entered quickly and hung her coat and bag

'Have you missed me?' his voice cut into her and she desperately tried to find that calm isolation she'd managed before Bond became involved.

She turned and saw his face, he was tanned from a week in Dubai

'It's always different when your away' She said honesty

'Come here' He said, she turned and walked over to him, in the doorway of the living room. He grabbed her head and kissed her aggressively, she manage to make no noise and hardly flinched. He pulled her against him hard, moving to her neck as he growled in her ear,

'I was expecting you to be waiting for when i got home. But no matter, we've got time'

she let out a silent prayer and closed her eyes. This was hell.

Bond woke late, exhausted and with hangover, he remembered his 'company' leaving around 0300 and decided one more drink before bed was a good idea he had no clue when he actually got to sleep, or why he was on the floor beside the wardrobe rather than in the bed, he dragged himself up and he checked the clock

'13:17' Fuck, it was really late.

His body worked on auto-pilot as her showered and dressed, he was pulled back to reality while shuffling through his wardrobe and noticed the blue shirt he'd given M hanging there, he took it out and stared at it. After how ever long he stared at it, he took it from the coat hanger and placed it back in the middle drawer, whether she cared or not, she would always be welcome. The apartment suddenly felt stuffy and claustrophobic, he decided he needed a walk.

He couldn't tell you where he went or how he'd managed to get back, when he walked back though the door at 1800, all he knew was he was drenched and cold. He showered again and changed into casual clothing, turning on the TV, he clicked aimlessly through the channels until he fell asleep there on the sofa.

He awoke to a knock at his door; he grumbled and thought about ignoring it, probably some random neighbour after sugar, M had a key anyway. He sat hoping the person on the other side would leave him be, but they became more persistent and he felt that if it was M he really couldn't refuse her anything. He stood and walked slowly, pulling the door to see a pale faced, worried Eve standing there.

'What are yo..?' Bond began before Eve cut in

'She's in hospital'