Chapter Nine | Coffee & Bonding

Clint

Humming idly, Clint surveyed the shelves in front of him. Thor hadn't tried the Cookies Cream flavour yet, or Hot Fudge Sundae... but there was a limited edition of Jolly Rancher flavours which intrigued him; cherry, watermelon and green apple. Thor would eat anything set in front of them but still, Clint wanted to steal at least several so green apple and watermelon were out of the picture. The thought of that... ugh, it made his tongue ache thinking about it. Green fruits were gross.

Eventually deciding to just get a few boxes of Poptarts for each flavour since he had the money to buy everything, Clint knelt and started grabbing the ones from the bottom shelf. Confetti Cupcake, Frosted Grape, S'Mores...

"Clint?"

A voice speaking out of nowhere made him yelp in surprise, slipping on the floor with the multiple boxes he had in his arms falling out of his grasp, scattering across the aisle.

"That was... the least graceful thing I have ever witnessed," Alaina stated, amused. "For an assassin that was kind of depressing to watch."

"For an assassin that was kind of depressing to watch," Clint mimicked in a high-pitched voice, standing up while trying to re-equip the boxes littered around him. It was very ungraceful, only proving Alaina's statement. God dammit. "Why the hell are you in Target at 11 a.m. on a Sunday?" he asked when he straightened up, tossing the various flavours of Poptarts in his trolley.

"You say that as if it's shocking that people shop on Sundays," Alaina retorted. Her hair was shorter than he last saw her the night before, so he presumed that she got it cut this morning, and she was wearing her usual attire which consisted of a loose tank top and a pair of baby blue jeans. She had a leather jacket tied around her waist, level with the quarter-full basket hanging off her arm. "I found 50 bucks in my jacket this morning, no doubt from the inconspicuous Sam who worries constantly about my wealth and health." She patted the leather. "Thought I'd buy some shit before work exhausts me. What are, uh..." Alaina's eyes flickered to the items in his trolley, "I'm guessing you're a fan of eating a copious number of calories in one sitting?"

"It's for the team, too," Clint grumbled, pulling the lie out of his ass. "Thor is a god so he eats like an actual god. This is his favourite food."

Alaina blinked. "Wow, it's... weird to hear that a Norse God likes Poptarts." She shook her head. "Anyway, I'll leave you to it. Sam threw up half of his body weight this morning and is currently passed out on my bed so he probably won't go back to The Tower today, or tomorrow for that matter." Alaina stepped back and gave Clint a small smile. "Tell the team I said hi."

"You could tell them yourself?" Clint suggested, his trademark smirk making an appearance when the woman frowned. "I'm about to have lunch with Wanda and Tasha. Why don't you join us?"

Alaina sighed. "Clint..."

"What?" he asked innocently. "It's just a friendly lunch date, Al."

"A date to try and get me and Natasha on a date, right?" Al cocked a knowing eyebrow, her lips pursed.

"Nooooo..."

"You and Sam are the least slick people I've ever met, Clint," she said, shaking her head with a chuckle. "I've been set up on many dates and none of them ended well. As proven by me living alone and the lack of ring on my finger."

"What- You mean the dominatrix and bowel guy?!" Clint exclaimed, pouting like a petulant child. "Natasha isn't a dominatrix or a bowel... Anyway, that's not the point!" He shook his head frantically, earning a bewildered look from the woman in front of him. "If you don't give it a shot then what's the point? Everyone wants you to get together so why not give it a go?" Clint's eyes widened, and he immediately backtracked. "I-I mean, not everyone..."

"No, no, what do you mean everyone?" she asked, holding a hand on her hip above the leather jacket. "Have you and Sam been talking about mine and Natasha's non-relationship with the team?"

Clint looked sheepish. "Well, just... Stark, you know? Maybe Steve, too." Alaina didn't look too convinced, judging by the somehow intimidating but blank look on her face. Stupid soldiers being stupidly scary. "Well, okay, maybe the rest of the team too. Including Bruce who also wants you to get together."

"God, and I thought Sam was a bad liar," Alaina muttered, chewing her lip in thought. Her eyebrows furrowed as Clint gave her a hopeful look. "I can't go to lunch, Clint. I have a 10-hour day tomorrow and I need to get more clothes." Clint pulled out his puppy eyes. Please work, please work, please work... "Fine." Alaina sighed through her nose. "But only because you're paying, jackass."

Clint nearly did a happy dance right there and then.

Alaina

God, why the hell did she agree to this? Alaina wasn't lying when she said she had stuff to do but nope, Clint had to be a persistent little shit. He was just like Sam, but not in a good way.

Al and Clint were sat outside a little corner cafe near Central Park, which was pretty full due to it being a warm day. There were only a few elderly people in the cafe - Clint explained that only locals went in and tourists usually went to the better-known places, which was good for the team because they could go there without being noticed. Although it was mostly Clint who went there since he had a strange obsession with coffee.

Natasha and Wanda were on their way which Al was grateful for, as she at least had a bit of time to mentally prepare herself before she made herself look like an idiot. At least she wasn't a fumbling mess when she met Wanda and Vision, even with Thor to an extent, but Alaina doubted it would make a difference regardless. Clint seemed to be the most adamant to get to know her which was a... strange feeling, to put it lightly. She read all the Captain America comics with Sam growing up and while in the army - she even had a poster of him on her wall, for god's sake - but he was too perfect, the embodiment of The American Dream who fought Nazis and punched Hitler in the fucking face.

He was the one Al looked up to, but Hawkeye was the one who she wanted to be. He didn't have super strength, billions of dollars, magical powers or shapeshift into a powerful creature... He was extraordinary in his own way, just like Black Widow.

And now Al was friends with both of them.

Which was weird.

Like, really weird. And she's seen some weird shit.

"So," Clint started, rocking back in his seat with a determined glint in his eye. "I've been talking to Sam-"

"Didn't we just have a conversation about this?"

"- and we both came to the mutual understanding that you should ask Tasha out on a date," he finished, crossing his arms smugly.

"You say that as if it's a shocking revelation that you two want that to happen." Al said, bringing her cup of hot drink to her lips. The black coffee tasted bitter on her tongue but she preferred it that way. "Natasha and I are big girls. If we did like each other, which we don't, we'd be able to do it without our friends trying to force it."

"Well," Clint shrugged, "I know she is interested."

Alaina nearly spit out her coffee. "What?" she spluttered, staring at him in shock. "Stop bullshitting. You're worse than Sam."

"I'm not," Clint argued defensively, eyebrows at his hairline. "She told me that you were her perfect type; strong, tall, short hair, dark eyes, a nice rack-"

"Dude." Al couldn't stop her heart from pounding against her chest. Was he being serious? "You should probably stop there."

"Are you having gay panic?" Clint looked sympathetic. God, Al wanted to hit him. "Trust me, I get that a lot."

"You're straight," she pointed out, heart still hammering.

"Not for Thor." He looked past Alaina in deep thought. "I would climb that man like a tree."

Alaina's lips parted, eyebrows furrowed like she didn't know what to say. And she really, really didn't know how to respond to that.

"Anyway," Clint shook his head, blinking. "It isn't just the physical aspect. Tash likes you, Al. When you fell asleep on each other during movie night, she said that it was the most she'd ever felt for someone in a long time. And," he leaned over the table, smirking, "she thought it was super hot the way you knocked Stone down a peg or two. And said she nearly kissed you right there and then when you had a go at Tony and Steve last night." He winked, leaving her in a stupor. "Well, it was pretty hot."

"Wh- What...?"

"Alaina?" a sultry voice questioned in surprise before the space next to her became occupied. "I didn't know you'd be joining us." Speak of the devil and she doth appear.

"Yeah, me neither," Al chuckled, wrapping her fingers around her coffee mug to stop them from shaking. Natasha was sat so close that she could just feel her, right there, next to her, existing. How can someone be so attractive just existing like that? How dare she. "Hey there, Wanda." Al gave her a two-fingered salute as she took the seat next to Clint. He did the favour of pre-ordering their drinks, so each cup matched where their owner sat. The dick knew Natasha would sit next to Al.

"It is good to see you again," Wanda smiled, her accent drifting over Alaina like a cool wave. "How is Sam doing?"

"Besides the hangover, grouchiness, throwing up all over my bathroom and barely escaping a broken liver, he's okay," Al replied. Natasha gave a breathy laugh next to her.

"Sounds like someone I know," Natasha murmured, smirking at Clint over her cup. She had her coffee like Al's, black and bitter. Hey, it was just like Sam this morning!

"At least I didn't throw up," Clint grumbled.

"And you didn't challenge Captain America and Thor to a drinking contest," Alaina intercepted.

"But you did lose against the guy who challenged Captain America and Thor to a drinking contest," Natasha pointed out.

"It wasn't... that bad," Clint argued weakly.

"No, it was," Wanda backed up Natasha and Al. "You married Alaina and Natasha rather loudly before declaring that they were the cutest couple in the land."

Al flushed, lowering her head and pressing her lips between her teeth to stop herself from smiling like a dork.

"Could've been worse," Clint shrugged. "At least I didn't threaten Tiberius Stone."

"Oh, come on, it was hardly a threat," Al objected, pursing her lips. "I asked him to leave Stark alone."

"And then implied that he couldn't get a boner," Natasha said, but it wasn't the same tone that Tony had used. She sounded impressed. She thought it was super hot the way you knocked Stone down a peg or two, Clint's words echoed in her mind. Alaina shook away the thoughts quickly. "And called him a... limp-dicked prick, right?"

"The man got what he deserved," Wanda commented, praising Al. "We all want to bring down his ego, even Steve despite his annoyance. They have an image to maintain so they do not like it when someone speaks what they think."

"So I should become the spokesperson for The Avengers, huh?" Al grinned broadly, leaning back in her seat. "I don't fight the bad guys, but I will knock them down a few notches."

Clint replied with something witty but Al didn't listen when her phone started vibrating in her pocket. She slid it out and looked at the caller ID, her smile faltering. Natasha noticed, tilting her head with creased eyebrows and a concerned expression on her face.

"Sorry, I have to take this," Al interrupted suddenly, sliding out of her seat. She brushed past Natasha and Wanda and ignored Clint's confusion, ducking around the corner before answering the call. "Hello?" she asked more out of instinct than anything else, since she already knew who it was.

"Hey there, Ally," his gruff voice sounded. He even had the nerve to sound guilty. "I know this probably ain't a good time, I'm, uh... I need your help."

"Are you fucking kidding me right now?" Al growled, her eyes stinging. "You need my help?"

"I got myself in some serious shit, I-" he cut himself off, hissing through his teeth. "I'm sorry. Ain't got no one else to trust but you."

Alaina scoffed. "You better find someone else, Castle. Try Curt or Billy," she said, "because I'm not helping you with shit." She abruptly hung up and threw her phone on the ground, hearing but not seeing the smash of the screen.

And she thought her life couldn't go more downhill.

Author's Note: Did I really add Frank Castle to this fic? Damn right I did! I'm guessing a lot of you haven't watched The Punisher or any of the Netflix shows, but do not fret, I'll fully explain anything that happens in the show which ties back in with this fic. If you DO have Netflix, I highly recommend watching it regardless because it's such an amazing show, and Jon Bernthal nails the performance.

The main plot is gonna get moving now because, well, I'm not one to write super fluffy and happy stories (but this one has a happy ending I promise). That's something to look forward to.

Until then, have a fun day/week/month/year!

Edited: 29.08.18 (I just realised it's my birthday eight months from today).