Me: Long chapter for you!
Erik: More torture for me.
Me: So, enjoy this chapter! Next one is the get-together!
Erik: I am dreading it.
Disclaimer: I never claimed to own POTO! Please don't sue me! I'M TO YOUNG TO BE BROKE!
Me: *Walks in the door* Wow, I start a lot of chapters by walking in the door lately.
Erik: That's because you come home from school a lot.
Raoul: I'm hungry.
Me: I'll get you boys some lunch, then me and Christine are heading out.
Erik: I still don't see why you can't take us with you.
Me: Because school is important.
Erik: We're all fully educated! Well, Jack isn't, but he's suspended!
Jack: *Lying on the couch* Heyo!
Me: SO you guys are all staying here.
Raoul: That isn't fair.
Me: Life isn't fair. Come on Christine; let's get these bozos some food. I don't want them touching the butter knives again.
Erik: THAT WAS ONE TIME! AND THERE WASN'T EVEN MUCH BLOOD!
Jack: Oi, mates, over here.
Erik: What do you want?
Jack: Look what I swiped. *Pulls a small chest from behind the couch*
Raoul: That…that's…
Erik: The ACOPHF.
Jack: Yup. And would Megan go to Regina without this?
Erik: No way.
Jack: And what is it big enough to hide?
Erik: *Catches on* A whole army.
Raoul: I don't get it.
Erik: Just act natural. And don't say anything!
Raoul: Got it!
Me: Got your lunches guys. try not to actively destroy them. I've got to load up. Head back to school when you're done. *Leaves*
Jack: Okay, she's gone. Get in! *Jumps in the ACOPHF*
Erik: Come on fop.
Raoul: But … who knows what's in there?
Erik: We'll find out. *Shoves him in the ACOPHF and jumps in after him*
Me: *Walks in with Christine* The boys must have left. Ready to go?
Christine: No.
Me: We have to. Just let me grab the ACOPHF. *Grabs it* Okay, off we go!
*We get into the van and drive off*
Christine: How long is the drive?
Me: A few hours. Want to watch a movie? There's some in the ACOPHF.
Christine: Okay. *Opens the ACOPHF* AAAAHHHHH!
Me: What is it?
Christine: Erik, Jack and Raoul!
Me: What the…? *Looks in* I should have known.
Erik: Hi Megan! *Climbs out*
Jack: You really didn't think you could leave us behind, did you?
Raoul: I was forced.
Me: Ah, but you've fallen into my trap!
Erik: …What?
Me: I k new that you three would throw the mother of all temper tantrums if you knew where we were going, so I hatched a plot to make you come of your own free will!
Erik: What are you going on about?
Me: I left the ACOPHF unattended while Jack was home alone. I knew you two would be the ones to do the opposite of what you were told, and I knew you'd drag Raoul along. You three hid in the ACOPHF, wanting to come, not knowing that was what I wanted you to do all along!
Erik: *Facepalm* How could I not have seen it? It was all too easy!
Raoul: Why did we have to come!
Me: Eye appointments.
Everyone in the car: NOOOOOOOO!
*Two hours later, in the orthodontists office*
Me: Wow. Two hours of solid screaming. Did you four even breathe?
Erik: I don't think so.
Me: Oh well. You guys go sit down while Christine and I sign in.
Erik: I still can't believe we fell for that!
Jack: I can't believe you can't believe we fell for that.
Me: Okay, we're signed in. Now we wait for the receptionist to call our names.
Receptionist: Megan?
Me: That's me. Be good. I'll be back in a few minutes. *Leaves*
Erik: Are you okay Christine?
Christine: What if it hurts?
Raoul: Then Megan will give you painkillers.
Christine: What if it hurts so much I can't eat? Megan said that could happen.
Erik: Then you'll eat soup.
Christine: I still don't want to.
Jack: Cheer up missy. It'll be over before you know it.
Me: *Returns* Christine, you're up.
Christine: Wish me luck. *Leaves*
Jack: Poor lass.
Erik: That didn't take long.
Me: It's just a retainer check. Christine will be a while.
Erik: What do we do until then?
Me: *Hands him a magazine* Read this.
*Twenty minutes later*
Christine: *Walks back in* Hey guys.
Erik: How are you feeling?
Christine: Sore.
Me: It'll get better. Come on, we still have to go to our eye appointments.
Raoul: Back to the car!
*Ten minutes later*
Erik: Megan…
Me: Yes?
Erik: This is a mall.
Me: Our eye doctor is in a mall.
Raoul: Is that sanitary?
Me: It's sanitary. Come on, this way. *We walk in* I'll go check us in. Go find some way to amuse yourselves.
Erik: Oh great. More waiting.
Raoul: Hey, what's that?
Jack: I'd say it's the answer to our boredom problems
*Ten minutes later*
Me: Guys? Oh my-
*The group is playing with the kiddie activities in the waiting room*
Erik: What?
Me: Those toys are for little kids!
Erik: And we're children at heart.
Me: Good Lord. It's like endless babysitting. Fine, play with the toys.
Christine: Yay!
Raoul: Thanks Megan!
Jack: How does this puzzle work?
Me: You match the pieces to the pictures on the board.
Jack: Thanks!
Erik: How long do we have to wait?
Me: I don't know…
*A very long time later*
Receptionist: Megan and crew?
Erik: You signed us in as your crew?
Me: It was that or as my posse. Now get moving. *We walk to the examination area*
Doctor: Hello there! Just sit here and put your eyes against this machine.
Me: Okay. *Does so*
Doctor: Good. Now this one.
Me: *Does so*
Doctor: Good. Now head to the eye hart area.
Me: See you. *Leaves*
Doctor: And how are you today?
Christine: Good.
Doctor: Just put your eyes against this machine.
Christine: *Does so* I see a house.
Doctor: Just stare at the house.
Christine: It's a blurry house. Now it's clear. Now it's blurry. Now it's clear.
Doctor: Done! Who's next?
Erik: *Points at Raoul* Him!
Raoul: Hey!
Doctor: Just sit in the chair…
Me: *Outside the door* I wonder if they're done.
Christine: *Walks out* Man, it's crowded in there.
Me: You the only one done?
Christine: Yup. Raoul should be out in a moment.
Raoul: *Comes out* What was the point of that?
Me: I don't know.
Jack: *Comes out* Hey all.
Me: Hi Jack. How'd it go?
Jack: There was a red house. That's it.
Me: Erik should be done soo-
Erik: *From in he room* NO! I'LL NEVER LET YOU BRAINWASH ME!
Doctor: FOR CRYING OU LOUD, YOU ARE A GROWN MAN!
Me: *Sigh* I'll get him. You guys go to the eye chart examination.
Christine: Okay. *Walks away with the guys*
Me: Erik! She's not trying to brainwash you! Just do what she says! The rest of us did it!
Erik: Oh…okay. *Sits down*
Me: Good boy.
Doctor: Okay, you're done. Now get out.
Me: Come on Erik. *We go to the eye chart examination, where Christine, Raoul and Jack are waiting*
Doctor #2: Hey there. Who's first?
Me: I'll go. *Sits in the chair and puts my face against the machine*
Doctor #2: What does this row of letters say?
Me: O. P. Q. W. R.
Doctor #2: Good. And this one…
*A few minutes later*
Doctor #2: Okay, you're good! Still nearsighted in one eye, but it hasn't gotten any worse.
Me: Oh good. Jack, you're up.
Jack: Okay. *Sits in the chair*
Doctor #2: Okay, what does this row of letters say?
Jack: J. Q. 49. Happy face. Z. E-I-E-I-O.
Me: *Facepalm*
*After Jack's examination*
Doctor #2: Sir, are you drunk?
Me: Yes. Yes he is.
Doctor: Okay. How about you come back when you're sober?
Jack: Okay. See you never!
Me: *Headdesk*
Erik: Don't hurt the doctor's desk Megan.
Christine: My turn! *Sits in the chair*
Doctor: What does this row of letters say?
Christine: H. J. L. K. R.
Doctor: Good.
*After the examination*
Doctor: You have some good eyes.
Christine: It makes up for the bad teeth.
Doctor: Next!
Me: *Shoves Raoul*
Raoul: Okay, I'm going! *Sits in the chair*
Doctor: What does this row of letters say?
Raoul: um…P. R. J? No, T. M. S.
Doctor: Okay…
*Just skip this part*
Doctor: I think you may need reading glasses.
Raoul: Aw, come on!
Doctor: They're just for reading.
Me: It could be worse. You're up Erik.
Erik: Fine. *Grumbles and sits in the chair*
Doctor: Can you please take off the mask sir?
Erik: No.
Me: Erik, no one cares!
Erik: I do!
Me: *Sighs, walks up to him and rips off the mask*
Erik: HEY!
Me: Calm down Erik! It's okay! No one is scarred!
Doctor: it's perfectly fine. I don't care about your face, only the state of your eyes.
Erik: Well…okay.
Me: Good!
Doctor: What does this row of letters say?
Erik: *Sigh* J-L-K-H-M.
Doctor: Impressive.
*If you are reading this, you win a virtual cupcake. Now skip!*
Doctor: Your eyes are perfect!
Erik: Great. Can I have my mask back?
Me: Okay. *Gives him his mask* Lets just get out of here. I'm taking you to Dollarama!
Erik: Whoza-whata?
Me: It's a store. Move it people!
*We grab Raoul's new reading glasses, leave and go out into the mall*
Erik: I still can't believe your optometrist operates in a mall.
Me: Who cares? Look, here's the Dollarama. And they have Halloween stuff!
Erik: Oh joy.
Me: You just are asking for it now.
Erik: *Hands over a dollar*
Me: Sweet. Now I can buy something!
Christine: SCREEE!
Erik: CHRISTINE!
Raoul: What is it?
Christine: They're selling SEVERED ARMS!
Me: Christine, those are plastic.
Christine: Oh.
Me/Erik/Jack/Raoul: THE RUT!
Christine: EEEK! Will you stop that?
Me: And scrap our best running gag? Never!
Erik: It would be blasphemy!
Christine: Fine.
Me: *Goes wandering down the aisles* Ooh, creepy door knocker. OH MY GOOD GRACIOUS!
Christine: What?
Me: *Holds up a black, full face mask on a stick* MASQUERADE MASKS!
Christine: Oooh! Pretty!
Me: *Holds the mask against my face* MAQUERADE! PAPER FACES ON PARADE! MASQUERADE! HIDE YOUR FACE SO THE WOLRD CAN NEVER FIND YOU!
Erik: Will you shut up?
Me: NEVER!
Christine: *Grabs a mask* We are so buying these!
Me: I love 'em!
Erik: Can we go?
Me: Sure. I've got my mask and my creepy door knocker. Let's go pay.
*We walk to the till*
Me: Hey, two suckers for one dollar. Anyone want a lollipop?
Erik: ME!
Christine: I DO!
Raoul: I'll take one.
Jack: *Shrugs*
Me: *Grabs five suckers* Okay, that's everything.
Clerk: That'll be $6.45
Me: I love this store! *We leave*
Erik: Where are we going now?
Me: To supper. We're going to my favourite restaurant!
Christine: What is it?
Me: It's called Teppanyaki. It's awesome! They cook the food in front of you!
Erik: What's so exciting about that?
Me: They light stuff on fire.
Erik: Really?
Me: Yeah!
Erik: Let's go!
*One drive later*
Me: Here we are.
Erik: This place is tiny.
Me: Just go in.
*We walk into the oriental-themed restaurant*
Christine: *Whistles* This place is fancy.
Me: Come on. Our table is this way.
*We walk into another room and sit down*
Erik: Is that a grill?
Me: Yup!
Waitress: *Walks in* Hot towel?
Me: Yes please!
Raoul: Why are we getting hot towels?
Me: They always do this. It feels good on the face.
Christine: She's right! This feels awesome!
Erik: *Opens a pack of chopsticks* What the heck are these?
Me: Chopsticks! *Opens my pack and starts clicking them* You use them to eat your food.
Erik: How?
Me: Like this. *Demonstrates* See? Easy!
Erik: Tries and fails* Can I just get a fork?
Me: Wuss.
Waitress: *Walks in* What can I get you all to drink?
Me: Sprite!
Erik: Coke.
Me: When did you try Coke?
Erik: You really zone out when you watch TV.
Christine: Megan, what are these things?
Me: Shirley Temples. They're good.
Christine: I'll have one of those.
Raoul: I don't know what most of these are.
Me: He'll have a sprite.
Jack: Anything alcoholic for me.
Waitress: Okay, I'll be right back. *Leaves*
Christine: *Looks through the menu* What's with the strange names?
Me: They're Japanese. Look, they say what it is in English down here. This one is steak, this one's lobster, and this one is chicken!
Erik: What are you getting?
Me: The steak-and-chicken combo. I'm feeling rather carnivorous today.
Jack: I'll take the lobster. It reminds me of home.
Christine: I the chicken good?
Me: Beyond good.
Christine: I'll take that.
Erik: Um, I have the shrimp and steak.
Me: So we've all decided.
Waitress: *Walks back in* Here are your drinks. Are you ready to order?
Me: Yup. *Gives our food orders*
Waitress: Okay, the chef will be here in a moment. *Leaves*
Me: Oh boy. Here comes the fun part.
Chef: *Walks in* Hi there! How are you all?
Me: We're good.
Chef: Nice mask.
Erik: *Glares* Who asked your opinion?
Me: Erik! Sorry, he's a bitter person.
Chef: It's okay. Now, you hungry?
Christine: Yes!
Chef: Okay, let's get started! *Starts doing this juggling thing with the knives*
Me: Whoa!
Christine: That is amazing!
Erik: Pff. Big deal.
Chef: Any of you wanna try?
Me: Well, if it isn't a big deal, why don't you give it a go Erik?
Erik: Um, no thanks. I'll just embarrass him.
Me: Yeah right.
Chef: *Starts chopping an onion and piling the slices on top of each other*
Erik: What is he doing?
Me: *Covers my eyebrows*
Erik: What are you doing?
Me: Nothing.
Chef: Lights the onion on fire so it looks like a volcano*
Christine/Jack/Raoul/Erik: Ooh. *Lean in closer*
Me: *Leans away*
Erik: What's the matt-
Chef: *Slices the onion volcano and it turns into a giant fireball*
Christine: EEEEEE!
Jack: HOLY KRAKEN!
Raoul: MY HAIR!
Erik: DUCK AND COVER!
Me: Guys! It's over!
Erik; Oh, good.
Raoul: Are my eyebrows still there?
Me: Barely. Jack, your dreds are smoking.
Jack: Oh, thanks. *Puts them out*
Chef: *Continues cooking*
Me: Isn't this exciting?
Erik: Is he going to try to roast our eyebrows again?
Me: I don't know, uh, *Covers eyebrows* watch the shrimp.
Erik: Back!
Chef: *Lights the shrimp on fire*
Me: Hope everyone likes well-done shrimp.
Chef: Here you are. *Gives our food*
Me: Dig in everyone!
Christine: This is good!
Me: I love eating here!
Erik: It is rather enjoyable.
Jack: *Has his mouth too full to talk*
Raoul: Utterly barbaric, that's what he is.
Jack: Whu?
Me: Is everyone using their chopsticks okay?
Erik: *Stabs his food with the chopsticks* I'm good.
Me: Okay then.
*After we finish*
Raoul: I am absolutely full.
Me: So let's pay and go. We still have one more stop to make.
Erik: Where?
Me: THE HALLOWEEN STORE!
Erik: Oh good Lord.
*One drive later*
Me: Wow.
*All around us there are wall-to-wall costumes, life-sized moving decorations and a wall of masks*
Christine: This is creepy.
Me: I'm in Heaven. *Runs up to a Ghost Face figure which wields a knife at me*
Erik: LOOK OUT! *Shoves me out of the way*
Me: Erik! It's a fake!
Erik: What?
Me: Everything here is fake! They're decorations.
Erik: Oh. I didn't know that.
Me: It's okay. Thank you for attempting to save me.
Erik: It was my pleasure.
Me: I need to go look for a dress and pitchfork for my devil costume. Feel free to look around. *Leaves*
Christine: Um, Raoul? What's that? *Points at a darker area with eerie flashing lights*
Raoul: I don't know.
Erik: Well, let's check it out!
Jack: No thank you.
Erik: Oh, so the great Captain Jack Sparrow is chickening out on us?
Jack: I never said that!
Erik: Then lets go!
*They walk into the area, which is made up to look like a graveyard*
Christine: I'm scared.
Raoul: It's okay Christine. Megan said nothing was real, remember? *Steps on a button on the ground which activates a zombie girl eating a brain*
Jack: EEEEEEK!
Raoul: OHMIGOD SHE'S GOING TO EAT ME!
Erik: Guys, it's fake, remember-*Step on a button which activates a pop-up zombie* AAAAIIIIEEEE!
Christine: SOMEONE HELP US! *Crashes into another button which activates a vampire rising from it's coffin*
Erik/Christine/Raoul/Jack: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! *Run for their lives and crash into me*
Me: Whoa! What happened?
Erik: Th-the-there's d-d-dead people in the-there!
Me: Really? *Goes in* This is so cool! I wish I had the money for these!
Christine: I think I saw my life flash before my eyes.
Me: *Comes back out* Wow, that stuff is awesome!
Erik: I hate the future.
Me: Oh, it's not too bad. Check out my pitchfork!
Christine: It's…
Erik: Evil-looking.
Me: I know! I also found a Gryffindor tie, and socks representing each of the Hogwarts houses!
Erik: At least that's not scary.
Me: Now I wanna go look at the creepy masks!
Erik: Why us?
Me: Let's go!
*In the masks department*
Christine: Are these werewolves?
Me: Yup! The real kind!
Erik: Not the Twilight kind?
Me: Definitely not. *Looks through a row of masks* Holy Punjab.
Erik: What?
Me: I found a Phantom mask!
Erik: What? *Looks at the mask in my hand, which is almost identical to his* What the heck is this?
Me: Proof that you are famous. I'm getting this!
Erik: No way.
Me: Yes way! *Runs away*
Erik: Ooh, that girl! *Chases after me* Megan? Where did you go?
Me: *From the costumes* Over here! I found a devil dress!
Erik: Oh good. *Walks over to where I am*
Me: See? It's perfect! Just a little short. *Hold up a costume with a picture of a very short red devil dress*
Erik: No way.
Me: Why not?
Erik: Look at it! That will barely cover you!
Me: I'll wear leggings!
Erik: I absolutely forbid it.
Me: Since when do you boss me around?
Erik: Since now. Put it back.
Me: No! I have a pair of leggings I can wear it with. It'll be fine.
Erik: I highly doubt your mother will agree to this.
Me: She suggested it!
Erik: Really? Your mother is here?
Me: Yeah. She drove us. I just never mentioned her in any scenes because I have trouble finding dialogue for her.
Erik: Megan, the fourth wall is cracking.
Me: Oh, Shiz. Get the plaster!
Erik: Got it!
Me: *Plasters the crack in the fourth wall* Ah, that's better.
Erik: Now, let's stop talking about it before it cracks again.
Me: Okay. Erik, this dress will be fine. All the others are too cute! I needed something that looked a bit ore real.
Erik: It has glitter.
Me: It's probably the only one that fits me, don't judge me!
Christine: There you guys are!
Me: And there you are!
Christine: Are you almost done?
Me: Almost. I'm gonna look at the decorations some more. There was one of a guy tied in a bag hanging upside-down that writhed over there!
Christine: *Shudders* That sounds horrible.
Me: It's awesome! *Leaves*
Christine: She is weird.
Erik: I know. Just humour her. Let's stay here in the costumes, where it's safe.
*One hour later*
Me: I'm in Heaven, I'm in Heaven, I'm in Heaven…
Erik: Megan! Are you ready to go yet?
Me: Yup. Just let me pay. *Pays* Okay, we're good!
*We pile back into the van*
Christine: What a day!
Me: I love that store. *Opens the Phantom mask and puts it on* How do I look?
Erik: Eerily familiar.
Me: Perfect!
Erik: Can you take that off? It's creeping me out.
Me: Never!
Jack: Wait, now there are two masked fellows? It was hard enough keeping track of one!
Me: Jack, you are an idiot.
Jack: That's Captain Jack!
Me: Funny how he rarely remembers that.
Erik: Just when we need a good closing line.
Me: *Hastily repairing the fourth wall* Wow, this thing requires a lot of maintenance!
Erik: Because you keep breaking it!
Me: I was very impressed with the people who read the author's notes. You all rock!
Erik: Sorry if we don't reply to your reviews.
Me: Still no email. I'll reply to as many as I can though!
Erik: She's still not done replying to the last chapter's reviews.
Me: Also, the poll for the Halloween costumes is up! So go take a look! We are currently voting for Raoul's costume!
Erik: That'll be fun. *Evil smile*
Me: And I really did get a Masquerade mask, a Gryffindor tie, Hogwarts house socks and a Phantom mask. I love that Halloween store! And the Dollarama!
Erik: I still think that dress is too short.
Me: And I said I'd wear leggings! I'm not an idiot!
Erik: I'm starting to doubt it.
Me: Grrr.
Christine: Don't forget to review!