Reviews from the readers:

I did notice a few errors here and here - more than usual, as though it was rushed a bit - so be careful. Still, I'm eager to see where everything leads with everyone... this group is like a series of time bombs ticking out of sync. I wonder if the explosions will be isolated, or cause chain reactions? Or both?

I admit, I did rush a bit on the last chapter, mostly because I disliked it. As a writer, I hate myself for that, but I just want to get to the good stuff already. As for errors, I try to clean them up, but I always end up leaving a few. I hope they weren't too detrimental.

Glad you're still interested so far though. But nothing of huge interest may be happening for awhile… or will it? Sit tight.

Journal Entry: July 18th 2008

I've been spending my free time over the past few days visiting the church. It's been awhile since I've been in one for purposes of worship, but now's a good time to start, given all the uncertainty. Maybe I'm just paranoid, but I was afraid that Carter would chastise me for suddenly turning to God the moment I saw a miracle, but he told me that such things are okay. He told me that my reasons for lack of faith were common, but now that I believe in God, I can take comfort in him as if I never left.

He's been answering all my questions, but the biggest one that he answered is this: How can you call yourself a Christian if you have a "Harvest Goddess?" Last time I checked, polytheism and Christianity don't mix. Well, he answered that too. Apparently, in the old days of farming, whenever there was a famine, the people would pray to God for a blessing. It is written in the book of the Harvest (their extra book in the Bible,) that God had sent numerous celestial beings known as the Harvest Angels down to Earth to watch over the people and answer their prayers (they pray to them sort of like how Catholics pray to saints? I don't know.) Anyway, because many members of the old Wicca communities found hope in these angels as well, they began to refer to them as the Harvest Goddesses. The name stuck. The Church of the Harvest has mostly died out with only a handful of parishes left, mostly in small farming communities such as this one. This branch of Christianity has received a lot of scrutiny from other Christian churches, but hey, Vatican City is a wasteland now, yet we're all still here. I wonder what the Pope would think of that…

I asked Carter another hard question… Kassie was an atheist like I used to be. But she's dead now, and knowing her, she probably didn't change her beliefs the minute before the nukes hit. Does that mean Kassie is in Hell? Carter says he's not one to judge whether or not someone should be in Hell. He told me that I shouldn't worry about it since there really is nothing I can do about it. Still, the thought of Kassie possibly suffering for all eternity is an awful one to process. I cried as I said a little prayer for her in the hopes that God will hear…

Chapter Eight: Walls of Glass

Date: September 2nd, 2011, Friday, 7:05 AM

A group of twenty men met at the boat dock on Mineral Beach. Walter was one of them. Using an old sea map, he was able to locate the island where he and his family had been living. Because they still had numerous supplies stocked in their hideout, the plan was for all of the selected men to row out to the island and collect the supplies to bring back to town. After all, there was always a chance that something useful was left behind, and the people did not want to waste anything.

"Okay men, here's the deal," Fernando shouted to the group. "We're gonna follow Walter's directions to get to his hideout. If he's not a dumbass with his map work, we should be back by six tonight. We're just gonna go straight there, strip whatever we find useful, then come straight back. One man rowing per boat at a time, the rest of them on guard. Be vigilant!"

"Yes sir," everybody said at almost the same time. One by one, they piled into seven large row boats, roughly three men to each. Jack managed to get a boat with Gotz and Gray. Gray quietly offered to take the first rowing duty, leaving Jack and Gotz to be on gun patrol. All the boats took off from the dock and headed out in a clustered formation.

Jack despised being selected for this duty. Even though it was a good service to the town to find useful supplies, he felt he would be better of pulling his weight on the farm. At least this day didn't count as his day off, which was coming tomorrow.

As he scanned the surrounding horizon for possible threats, he got a glimpse of Gotz, who was looking quite green.

"Having a good time, Gotz?" Jack asked with a chuckle directed at the carpenter's expense.

Gotz shot him a dirty look. "Shut up, Jack." He took a sip out of his canteen to try and alleviate his pain. "I hate scavenging," he moaned uncharacteristically. "Why do they pick me for these things? They know I hate being on boats. I'm a mountain man; not a sea dog." He held his head over the side of the boat and threw up a little bit into the radiated water.

"Well, you are the best man for stripping wood when we need you to on these jobs," Jack pointed out.

"We have other carpenters who are capable enough for this job," Gotz grunted as he wiped the spit up from his mouth. "Why do they keep choosing me?"

"Maybe it's because you're a good shot?"
"Maybe, but I don't know what they'll expect me to accomplish with my gun if I keep seeing all these spots in my vision," Gotz groaned as he rubbed his eyes. "Hey Gray, let me take over when you get tired. You could probably shoot a lot better than I can right now."

"Sure thing, old man," Gray replied in a monotonous voice as he effortlessly powered away at the oars. Working as a blacksmith had made him strong, so it didn't look like he was going to tire out anytime soon. He was sweating though, so he took off his hat and set it on his knee. Jack noticed that his red hair matched the goatee he was growing.

"How've you been, Gray?" Jack asked. He and Gray never usually talked all that much, so this was a good opportunity. "How's the blacksmith thing working out for you?"

"I've been good. It's fine, as usual." He answered both questions without thought.

"How's Arianna?"

"She's alright," he responded as he kept stroking. "She's having a lot of morning sickness though."

"How many months until the baby is due?" Jack questioned.

"Two or three months," Gray answered with a sigh. Jack didn't ask him anymore questions since Gray obviously wasn't interested in conversation. Gray wasn't exactly the social type, especially since the strikes. Ever since the nukes went off, he had worked his ass off so that he could be ready to take over the blacksmithing job for his grandfather, should the old man pass away or retire. Despite his endless working, he somehow wooed and married a castaway. They were expecting their first child in the late fall or early winter. Jack had a lot of respect for Gray though, since he had made so much of his situation. Like Jack, Gray was also born in the states, but he didn't seem nearly as bothered as Jack was with the world, or he didn't show it.

"Don't splash any of that water on you, or you're gonna get cancer!" Fernando shouted to the fleet. After giving the ocean another scan, Jack looked into the water below. He was amazed to see a small school of fish swim below the boat. He guessed that they must have found a way to adapt in the radiated ocean. They were like the rest of the world: just trying to get by another day.

After hours of rowing, the twenty men had finally reached the island where Walter's family had been hiding. The tiny island looked like a ghost town now with all of the little building structures stripped of most of their exterior wood. There were also numerous tree stumps scattered around the island. The trees that were still standing were dead.

"Cute place," Fernando muttered sarcastically. "Where's this wine cellar you was telling us about, Walt?"

"It's over there." Walter pointed at a dead grove of trees behind a scrapped house.

"Take us," Fernando demanded impatiently. "Stay frosty, boys. Could be raiders down there now!" The group formed a tightly knit group, each man armed with a gun. They made their way to the location that Walter had pointed out, but there appeared to be nothing there but an old brick flooring. Walter grabbed a dirty looking brick and pulled upwards. It turned out that the some of the bricks were not really bricks at all, but a disguise for a secret door. After the ground door was lifted, the men looked down into the cellar below. There were no sounds, but Fernando motioned for Jack and several others to inspect the hole. Strapping his sniper rifle back on to his back, Jack pulled out his pistol and flashlight and lead the suicide squad into the basement. After walking the aisles of the wine cellar and flashing the light around, he came to the conclusion that there were no raiders in the hole. He did however find what looked like a torch holder with a torch still in it, located near the stairs.

"Hey 'Nando, throw me some flint!" Jack called up to his superior. The leader tossed down a fire starter kit, and after a few strikes, Jack managed to get a spark to catch on the torch. It lit up, and he picked up the flaming torch so he could get a look at the cellar.

"Holy Goddess, look at all the wine," he blurted out. Two of the dozen aisle racks were stacked with wine bottles, and several kegs were stacked up as well. Some discarded blankets and other various objects were still sitting on the ground. The objects were the things deemed unimportant enough to salvage when the family had abandoned the cellar. He walked up to the other torches and lit them to illuminate the room. "We're all clear down here! Let's clean this place up!"

Fernando and several others entered the cellar. Upon seeing the wine collection that remained, he let out a whistle.

"We're drinking tonight, boys!" he shouted. "I want ten men to hull these out. The others, stay on patrol!"

"Hey 'Nando, we gonna be able to take all this wine back with us?" one of the men asked.

"It's gonna be a tight fit, but it'll work."

"What are we even going to do with all this wine and stuff?" a new guard asked.

"We gonna bring it home and put it in storage for the future since we already got plenty of sauce back home. However, I'm letting all you boys take one bottle each for free for coming out today. My treat."

"Are you even allowed to do that?" the newbie asked.

Fernando sneered at him. "Chico, Thomas don't control what I treat you with. If you don't want the wine that I am so graciously giving to you, give it to some woman you wanna bang… or man. I don't judge."

"Hey, wait a minute, you can't just give my wine away," Walter shouted in the enclosed space. "This is my wine and my blankets and my-"

"And my opportunity to put a bullet through your brain unless you quit bitching," Fernando cut in angrily. "I don't care if this was your wine. It's our wine now. It's the town's wine. You, as an individual, are irrelevant to Mineral Town's survival. We didn't come here for your selfish desires." He picked a bottle of wine off the wall and forced it into Walter's hands. "You want your wine? Here's your wine. Enjoy it." Fernando turned away from the disgruntled Walter. "Let's get a move on!"

The group of men began to carry the wine bottles, wine barrels, and the other various objects out to the boats. As he was carrying a box of wine bottles, Jack noticed the fancy writing on the labels.

"Is this stuff good?" he asked Walter as the two loaded some of the bottles in one of the boats.

"Yeah, it's an old vintage brand or something," Walter replied glumly. "That whole cellar was untouched when we found it. I guess whoever lived here three years ago got wiped out by raiders or something, because this wine is too good to leave behind. We used to exchange these bottles for food when the traders came by."

"Wait, you were able to find traders on a regular basis?" Jack questioned. "They never come by Mineral Town that often anymore."

"Really now?" Walter said sarcastically. "That surprises me, given your hospitality.

This statement caused Jack to let out a groan. Walter obviously wasn't over his entrance interrogation, despite the fact that his family had adjusted to Mineral Town. But it wasn't worth arguing with the man.

After several trip, all the wine was loaded up, and the men began to climb into their boats. Before Jack, Gotz, and Gray could get in theirs, Fernando motioned for them to stop.

"Gray," he started quietly, "you're coming with me. Walter will be going with you two."

"What? I don't want him in my boat," Jack protested.

"Well I don't want him in mine either," Fernando shot back. "He keeps staring at me funny. You take him. That's an order."

"Ugh, fine," Jack gave in. After a minute, Walter joined him and Gotz in the boat, and they set out for home with Gotz at the oars.

"I still can't believe I'm only getting one bottle of my wine," Walter whined, breaking the peaceful silence in the boat. He kept turning the one wine bottle he had received in his hands.

"I still can't believe you're griping about this," Jack commented. "You don't need all that wine. It will be best if we save it for later use."
"Whatever… commie…"

"Technically, we're socialistic timocrats, but whatever works for you, Walt." However, Walter's words did stir up Jack's insides. In a world like theirs with utilitarian tendencies, the probability of personal injustice was likely to strike everyone from time to time.

Even though it was nine o'clock at night, the clinic doors were still open for emergencies. Though there was nobody at the counter, there was a small bell that could be rung, should a doctor be needed for whatever reason. Jack entered the dimly lit waiting room, only to bump into the Doctor, who was leaving at the same time.

"Oh hey, what's up doc?" Jack said cheerfully. His smile fell once he realized that either Tim didn't get the reference or that he wasn't amused by it.

"Oh, hello Jack," he greeted professionally. "Are you feeling well? Do you need to see a doctor right now?"

"No, I'm just here to visit Elli. Do you know where she is?"
"I think she's upstairs in her room, but I'm leaving and I can't allow you to go up there without somebody to escort you. It's one of our policies."

"Can't you just tell me where her room is?" Jack asked, but Tim shook his head.

"I'm sorry Jack, but rules are rules."

"Then can you escort me up there?"

"Well…" the doctor stuttered as he kept nervously looking at the door. He obviously wanted to leave and Jack was slowing him down.

"Hey Jack, what are you doing here?" Jack looked to see that the voice's origin was on the stairs. Elli looked a little bit surprised to see him. She was wearing a yellow nightgown that ended a few inches above her knees.

"I came here to see you, unless you were busy wi-"

"No, I'm not busy. Come up stairs with me," she invited.

"Thank you Elli," Tim said in a relieved tone before heading out the door. Jack followed Elli up to the second floor of the clinic. There were multiple rooms on this floor where the live-in doctors and nurses lived, but Elli's room was on the end of the right side of the hall. When entering, Jack noticed that her room was tidy but very plain, except for various photographs of family and friends that hung on the wall. The quality of the room that was intense was the smell. The scent of flowers lingered in the air. Jack noticed that Elli had several flowers spread out on her desk.

"You weren't going to sleep yet, were you?" Jack questioned.

Elli shook her head. "No, I was just working on making some perfume, but it can wait." She motioned for him to sit on her bed before she went to put her things away. The mattress was soft.

"So," Elli continued as she sat down next to him, "why did you want to visit tonight?"

"Because I missed you," Jack purposefully answered in an obnoxiously sappy voice as he rubbed his nose against Elli's. She giggled and the two kissed.

"You just saw me yesterday," she replied, still smiling.

"Only for a few minutes. I wanted to spend a legit amount of time with you, but I guess if you want me to leave-" He began to stand up.

"No, please don't," she said in laughter as she pulled him back into sitting on the bed. "It's been incredibly boring around here. I'm glad you came by."
"Aw, thanks," he replied, giving her a quick hug. "So," he continued, "I noticed Tim seemed like he was in a big hurry to get out of here. I don't think I've ever seen him leave the clinic in years."
"Yes, he's busy all the time now ever since the strikes," Elli sighed. "I keep telling him that he needs a break, but he won't listen to me. But yeah, he has been leaving every night to go to the library."

"The library, huh? Isn't the library closed at this hour?"

"Yes, I think that's the point."

"Point of what?" Jack began in a confused tone. "If it's closed at night, then why does he…" It suddenly came to him. "Oh, I get it. It's not about the books, is it?"

"Nope," she chuckled. "Mary and him have been visiting each other in their spare time. It's really cute actually, seeing Tim happy like this. He's always so serious."
"So I've noticed," Jack agreed. "Mary's really smart though. She seems like his type."

"I agree, they're both intellectuals and everything."

"It's sad…" Jack commented. "I don't think I've actually spoken to Mary in over a year… I can't even remember the last time I've been to the library."

"I go from time to time," Elli said. "Are you not much of a reader?"

"To be honest, I don't think I've read an entire book since college, unless you count farming manuals as books," Jack answered glumly. "Tomorrow is my day off, so I'll stop by there and see what she has. Probably nothing new."

"Well duh, we haven't gotten any new books since 2008," Elli reminded him. A sad expression suddenly emerged on her face. "Do you think people will ever write new books in the future?"
"I would assume so," Jack sighed. "Not for awhile though, I bet. Not until the world gets back on its feet… if it ever does." A cool breeze came in through the window. Jack felt Elli shiver as it passed them. She was only wearing a nightgown after all.

"Here, let me close that for you," Jack offered. He stood up and pulled the window shut. "Looks like autumn is on the way."

"It doesn't feel like autumn," Elli said sadly. "It hasn't felt like autumn in such a long time."

Jack gave her a confused look. "What do you mean exactly?"

"I mean… Remember the fireworks shows they used to have?"

"Oh yeah," Jack replied softly. "I remember those. Well actually, I only remember the one from 2007 since they haven't done it since… it's a shame… those fireworks were really beautiful."

I know… They were the perfect way to end the summer. I wish they still did that event… I guess it's too dangerous now, given that the beach is hazardous now and we would just attract attention."

"Maybe someday in the future," Jack said in an attempt to console her.

"Maybe… I just wish… no, it's silly."

"What's silly?" Jack asked.

"Nothing, it's really juvenile. You'll laugh at me," she replied as her cheeks pinkened.

"I promise I won't laugh," he said as he put his right hand on his heart. "Just tell me."

"Fine, fine," she gave in. "I always went to those fireworks shows alone… maybe it's childish of me, but I always wanted to go with a boy that I liked… of course, I've never had a boyfriend, and… you probably think this is stupid, don't you?"

"Not at all," Jack replied truthfully. "I'm sure anybody can relate to that. I mean, we were all horny teenagers at one point in lives, so-"

"Jack!" Elli whined as she punched his side. "You promised that you wouldn't make fun of me!"

"Wrong, I promised that I wouldn't laugh," Jack corrected. Elli was blushing again, but she was still smiling. He would do anything just to see her smile like that.

He put his hands around her waist and began to kiss her. She received him and moved her arms over his shoulders and around his neck. As they continued, Jack shifted his hand to her bare knee, and began to slowly move it upwards towards her thigh. But as his hand passed the bottom of her nightgown, she reached down and touched his arm.

"Jack…" she murmured. She had a look of distress on her face.

"Okay," he whispered back weakly. He removed his hand and went back to their old routine. After a minute or so, they moved towards the wall as Jack pushed Elli against the headboard of her bed. It didn't take long before she froze up.

"I think I should be getting to sleep," Elli murmured. "I have work in the morning."

Jack pulled away from her. "Elli, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, I'm fine," she answered quietly, though she wouldn't look him in the eye. "Everything is fine."

"Okay…" he muttered. He stood up and began to leave the room, but he stopped halfway there. This happened every time they were alone together. Everything would be running so smoothly, but when he would try to take things to a new level, they halted.

"No Elli," he stated as he turned around to face her. "Everything is not fine."

"Jack, what are you talking abou-"

"And don't give me this 'I need to go to bed' crap, because you told me yourself that you weren't going to sleep yet." He looked to Elli for a response, but she didn't say anything. She just stared at him, confused and afraid. Calm down, you're freaking her out. "Look, Elli… I'm sorry for the outburst… I just… why does this keep happening?"
"Why does what keep happening?" she questioned.

"Whenever we're alone together, and we're making out, you always just freeze up and make some excuse for one of us to leave. Why does that always happen?"

"Well…" Elli began as she tried to put together a good reason, "Jack, don't you think we're moving kind of fast?" she asked.

"Fast? We've been dating for over a month," Jack argued.

"But I'm new to all of this," she retorted. "Why can't you understand that?"

"I do understand," he reasoned. "Or at least I'm trying to. I've been very patient with all of it, but…" He stopped so he could sit down with her on the bed. She still looked troubled. "But I… God, how am I going to say this without sounding like a pervert…" He paused momentarily to figure out what he needed to say. "I love your companionship, but I need more than just that." Silence took over. Jack noticed a serious look cross over Elli's eyes.

"You mean sex, don't you," she asked. Her voice seemed somewhat bitter.

"Well… no. Not right now at least. I'm not going to force you into anything like that, but I just want to know why you're so resistant."

"Because I know where this will lead!" Elli shouted. Jack flinched at the sudden increase in her voice. But upon looking at her again, she had immediately returned to her docile state. "Look, Jack, I know that if I allow myself to go too far, one thing will lead to another and-"

"And what's wrong with that?" Jack asked. "That's what normal relationships go through."
"But Jack… I'm so afraid." A tear formed in her left eye. Before it could roll all the way down her cheek, Jack stopped it with his finger.

"Elli… what are you afraid of?" he asked, trying desperately to understand. "Is it the radiation, the raid-"

"It's none of those things," she mumbled.

"Then what is it?"

"I… I can't tell you."

"You can tell me anything," Jack begged.

"We all have a secret that nobody should know. Don't you think that's true, Jack?" He stared back at her in silence. He had an answer to that question, but he couldn't bring himself to say it, because in his mind, she was right.

"Elli, I…"

"Jack, I think we need a break," she stated, interrupting him. "You're… you're such a great guy. You've made me so happy in such a shot period of time, but it's not fair to you if I can't give you what you want…" She tenderly touched his hand. "I think we need some time to see if this is right for us. I'm sorry."

Jack said nothing in response. He just continued to stare as if the answers would reveal themselves to him, but from everything he had experienced, he knew that it would never be that easy.

I leave on vacation soon, so there's a good chance that I won't be able to update for some time. Either way, I need some time off so I can think about what I want to do with certain portions of this story.

So review if you feel so inclined. See you on the flipside.