Chapter 10: Dumber
"Why are you so interested in San Ilia, Cody?" Alice questioned half-heartedly, arms crossed, eye narrowed-y'know, the classic Alice pose. Wonder what her stand would be called…
Why Cody was going to San Ilia was irrelevant to her, but it worked out for her in the end, she planned on bringing up where her special book was as a 'reward' for laying still under her services, but that proved both pointless and no lewd things had actually occurred.
God damn cum-block Lazarus.
She'd show him unrelenting cruelty for getting her toys to postpone.
She stopped mid-pace, did she really like these humans that much? And more importantly, was it that weird magic dice shit, or was it something actually about them? The others walked ahead of her, stopping a few moments later and turning back to her.
"Alice the fuck're you doing?" T asked, turning around as he rested his hand on his bastard sword- man it felt cool to have a fucking bastard sword.
Alice blinked, then shook her head, "Nothing idiot," and slithered back up to the party.
[T's Sense Motive: 20+6=26, Bluff: 1+9=10, T Wins!]
T's tsundere detector went off and he quickly replied, "You were thinking about one of us." he said, forgetting to make it sound like a questio- oh wait she knew about the dice, and knew he'd beat her bluff and knew what the fuck he kne- wait did she know about crit successes and fails? Wait the DM had homebrew Cri-
His mind wandered off pretty quickly, covering a lot in the split moment between his statement and Alice's reply.
"N-no!" Alice shot back, averting her gaze, "Just shut up, I was thinking about what I want to eat tonight."
Technically right.
The party feels a chill crawling up their spine.
"Cody and only Cody." T shot back, reading her like a book- and also his parano- I mean gut feeling being right again.
"I'll take who I want," Alice shot back out of mostly principal, "I am the monster lord, and currently, you are my subjects."
"You mean prisoners, subjects suggests we respect your authority." T says, glaring out of his helmet.
"Anyways, San Ilia has a lot of leads, I bet, and a big ass library," Cody finally answered Alice, "and seeing an actual book for the first time in a long time would be great," Cody smirked, "You know, a book that isn't a ghost book."
Alice blinked, "Don't you dare!"
But it was too late, Cody had manifested his stand.
And Alice couldn't see it.
Oh yeah, you only see them if you have yours out.
Cody looked like an idiot holding an invisible book and posing menacingly.
T popped his book out "Man you look autistic." he says, tearing his glare away from Alice to look at Cody normally
"Artistic?" Luka said looking confused.
'Oh yeah pseudo-medieval level understanding of things. Wonder if he thinks leeches are a cure all?' T thought to himself, but not explaining anything at Luka stared at him and he stared back.
"Are you gonna explain how he looks artistic?" Luka asked again
"Ah, tis, tic." T enunciated "Pretend it's slang for looking dumb."
"Wait so its not sla-" Luka began, confused, before being interrupted
"Cody's courting a fair maid, remember?" Alice suddenly chimed in, licking her lips, "I couldn't do such a thing to a young couple, so I'll take someone else…" she smirked.
"If this is how you get when you're 'hungry', and since Jessi really likes you, then I'll certainly feed you my lor-" Cody was interrupted by a high pitched outburst from Alice.
"Ooohh Luka boy~"
Within 0.0000000001 seconds T drew his sword and Luka fucking ran.
[Linebreak Motherfucker]
"Dear fucking lord." T said, wiping the traces of vomit from his lips as the duo of monster girls ran away "On one side kinda glad I did that, on another I should probably grow a tolerance to these things." he said with a sigh "That or eat less food."
Why was he saying that?
Well the puke inside the shellfish girls shell and the disgusted rant at cucumber that resembled Gordon Ramsay might be the origin.
He then paused for a moment thinking "Wait no I voluntarily failed that fort save, nevermind." he said, grabbing a waterskin from the cart to wash the taste of sick out of his mouth.
Cody just stood there, scarf over his mouth, disappointed that he didn't get to try out his new changes, and beat the shit out of some living garbage-mostly beat the shit out of some living garbage.
That scarf of menacing must also be a scarf of razor blades.
He just hoped the next monster put up more of a fight...
[Encounter Won! Congratulations!]
[Enemies Defeated: 1x Sea Cucumber Girl 1x Shellfish Girl!]
[XP Gained: 350!]
[Treasure Value: 900/900!]
{Items!: 2 Healing belts, 300 gold}
T honestly squee'd.
[Linebreak Motherfucker]
And as they walked they found two small hills of sand, a Lamia standing in the middle of them.
"Ah, uh, welcome to my uh…" she looks at her hand "Fighting arena? Fighting arena! Come and fight me! I'll uh, beat you?" the lamia said sounding confused about beating them.
"What?" Cody quirked a brow, "What are you, an Uruk-hai Captain?"
"Oorooki?" The lamia says, confused about the word
"Wow this is a blatant trap." T mumbles under his breath "Should we just...go along with it?" T whispers to Luka and Cody
"My blade is only for warriors, Orc!" Cody yelled, whipping out one of his daggers and tossing it into the dirt, "Suffer me now!" he produced his nunchucks and bone plates sprouted from his hands.
"Man I wish I knew more Mordor meme's." T said thought out loud to himself.
Cody blinked, then had the most horrible idea.
"Your situation just went from bad to worse, you face a human that speaks in verse!" Cody announced and began walking towards the now even more confused lamia.
She wanted to leave, but then a fucking heavenly knight said she'd cut her head off if she didn't do this, so she dealt with it.
T followed, and Luka ran ahead of him and Cody, wanting to vent his pent up aggression, the duo drawing their weapons- T's bastard sword of extra generic killing, and Luka's plot device of death.
Or well, life since it didn't kill people.
Luka got to fifteen feet ahead of them
[Initiative: T 10-5=5, C 18+3=21, Luka 20+1=21 Lamia 16+5=21, CRABS 12+2=14]
[Order: Lamia/Cody/Luka, CRABS, T]
T froze in place as Cody and Luka approached at the same time? Fuck you, I'm the DM, I make the rules. Slithering up to meet them, was the lamia, with a wide evil grin growing across her face.
Cody normal moved closer to the lamia, as Luka fucking charged in between the two hills, two-handing angel halo, prepared to purge the world of heretics, rushing straight up to lamia and-
[Hitting: 26][Attack Check: 1+16-17, Attack Missed!]
The lamia moved her head out of the way of the large, overconfident swing, like Luka was some random street thug and the lamia was an ex-yakuza who totally doesn't kill people.
"Fool," the lamia's voice was suddenly...deeper?
Cody blinked, something wasn't right. Everyone had moved-so why wasn't T taking his turn?
[CRABS turn initiated!]
Out from the sand exploded two familiar big soapy girls as one swarmed Luka right out the gate, and the other burst past him at T!
[Hitting Luka: 21][Attack Checks: 16+14=30 Success!]
[Hitting T: 21][Attack Checks: 8+14+2=24 Success!]
Hey remember those buffs that were talked about? I forgot some stuff.
Tactics and enemy count was a buff.
[T Damage Rolls: 5+15=20!]
[Damage Total: 20!-67=47HP!]
[Luka Damage Rolls: 1+15=16!]
[Damage Total: 16!-74HP=58HP!]
As T and Luka felt their bones crack as the two meteorite like giants threw their momentum into their blows as they in some sense thought they heard their armor creak (Though T know that was impossible, since they definitely didn't have improved sunder, so it was fluff, but the pain stopped him from thinking too much about it.)
Though that wasn't the end of it.
[Improved Grab Activated twice!]
[Opposed Grapple Checks: Crab girl A 17+23=40! T 9+17=26! Crab girl A wins!]
[Opposed Grapple Checks: Crab girl B 14+23=37! Luka 5+15=20! Crab girl B wins!]
[T Damage Rolls: 4+15=19!]
[Damage Total: 19!-47=28HP!]
[Luka Damage Rolls: 9+15=24!]
[Damage Total: 24!-58HP=34HP!]
And their guts sunk partially from the claw clasping around them and lifting them like dolls, but also because they were crushing their stomachs in their ungodly strong grips.
Cody gasped, the crabs leapt from their spots and confirmed his suspicion that something was off-different kinds of monsters working together? Intelligently?
Nonetheless one of the crab girls- thusly known as Crab girl B, still had a standard action, why?
Because she readied an action to ambush any men that walked near her hill.
Why did the other one (Crab girl A) charge instead?
They didn't really plan this together at all, and she though bursting out and running at her favored man would make sense, and to do so whenever B did, so it ended up with her grabbing T.
Nonetheless-
[Opposed Grapple Checks: 13+23=36, 7+15=22, Crab girl B wins!]
-she happily dragged Luka over towards her sister so the two of them could have fun with their guys together- and clean them too!
Though oddly nowadays was she...faster? Weird.
But whatever, it was T's turn now.
[Inspiration rolled!: Bonesplitting Strike, Revitalizing Strike!]
He hedged his bets in his head and…
[Revitalizing Strike Engaged!]
[Hitting:17][Attack Check: 17+14+2(Furious Counterstrike)=33! Attack Success!]
[Healing: 20+28HP=48HP!]
[Damage roll: 3+9+2(FC)=14!]
[Damage Total: 14!-80HP=66HP!]
...used those bets in his head for weight as he slammed his skull into the crab girls nose, blood bursting from it as he recoils a bit and touches her nose with her human hand to feel the wetness.
Cody hesitated, watching Luka and T struggle-Luka more than T, wondering who the fuck he should pry out of who's hands…
T could heal himself, but that was based on RNG, Luka didn't seem as strong but Cody couldn't tell for sure. He gulped, then started for T. T was the healer, if T was dead, than Luka was fucked, grappled or not.
Cody started in a full sprint, charging towards T and the beast that held hi-
[Grapple Detected! Attack of Opportunity!]
The lamia was on him, on him quicker than a lamia should be able to move, Cody sensed the attack of opportunity and quickly turned towards the lamia, letting his leg fly out as he blindly threw a roundhouse!
[Hitting: 26][Attack Check: 2+11= 13!, Attack Failed!]
Cody's eyes widened, for what had grabbed him was indeed the lamia-but with a catch, sprouting from her back were large, dragonic wings...
Cody's leg was caught by an arm that suddenly sprang from her side, an extra arm, with a harsh edged claw at the end of it.
[Opposed Grapple Checks!]
[Cody: 17+15=32! Doppelganger: 16+20=36! Doppelganger wins!]
The doppelganger sprouted all of her arms-all six of them, and violently latched onto Cody's body as her tail shifted and morphed into a pair of legs, and her face became the familiar visage of her natural form.
[Damage Roll: 3+11=14!]
[Damage Total: 14!-68HP=52HP!]
"She didn't know who she was talking too…" the doppelganger played the pronoun game, "she let me know where to find you for myself, threatened me with death if I didn't fight you," she cracked her neck, "she didn't have to."
In the middle of all this was Luka, who was panicking...but also angry, incredibly, immensely fucking angry, at this fucking crab, at Lazarus, at his dad, at Jessi, at Alice, he was fucking pissed.
And with this anger flowing through him, he did something odd.
He clasped his fists together, fingers interlaced...and swung.
[Hitting: 19][Attack Roll: 19+14-7(Power Attack)=26, Success!]
[Damage Roll: 2+6+14(Two Handed Power Attack)=22!]
[Damage Total: 22!-80HP=58HP!]
There was a crack as Luka smashed his fists into her meaty claw that was holding him, the surface chitin- or whatever crabs had fractured a bit where he hit it- and of course this pissed her off.
And well, the other one was also angry, they just wanted to give the two a bath after all.
[Constrict Activate!]
[Opposed Grapple Checks: Crab Girl A 4+23=27, T 19+17=36, T Wins!]
[Opposed Grapple Checks: Crab Girl B 15+23=38, Luka 8+15=23, Crab Girl B Wins!]
[Luka Damage Roll: 6+15=21!]
[Damage Total: 21!-34=13HP!]
Luka cringed as he felt his armor crack more, clawing at the, well, claw- though T quickly wrangled his fingers in between him and the claws, roaring as he held the damn things open, and that's when the inspiration hit him.
[Inspiration Rolled!: White Raven Tactics!]
He knew he was fucked for getting out of this...so he swung his knee at the crab girl, guided by the divine thought that flowed through him.
[Bonesplitting Strike Engaged!]
[Hitting:19][Attack Check: 12+14=26! Attack Success!]
[Bones Crushed, Crab Girl has -2 Constitution!]
[Damage roll: 2+9+2(FC)=13!]
[Damage Total: 20!-66HP=46HP!]
T as he smashed his teeth together gritting his teeth in a grin as his knew slammed into the crab girls human ribs feeling great satisfaction when his knee sunk into her body as she screamed in pain.
And then he yelled.
"LUKA!" he roared, looking over as Luka met his eyes- and Luka saw...White Ravens in them.
Luka's body filled with untold energy.
He had to do something.
So he did.
[Opposed Grapple Checks: Crab girl B 6+23=29!, Luka 20+15=35! Luka Wins!]
[Hitting: 19][Attack Check: 10+14-5(Power Attack)=19, Success!]
[Damage Roll: 3+6+10(Power Attack)=19]
[Damage Total: 19!-58HP=39HP!]
[Knock Down Activated!]
[Opposed Strength Checks: Luka 15+8=23, Crab Girl B 9+18+8(Extra Legs)!=35, Crab Girl B wins!]
[Counter Trip!]
[Opposed Strength Checks: 9+18=27, Crab Girl B 20+8=28, Luka Wins!]
As with many things in this encounter, Luka was screaming/yelling/roaring as he dug his fingers into the openings between his armor and the crabs claws...and jerked his body back- almost into a flip motion as he slammed the tips of his boots as hard as he could into the grab girls chin, the momentary lapse in grip from the pain and the strength flowing through him led to Luka prying the iron like grip from his body and landed on his feet…
But instinct kicked in as he slammed into the crab girl, wrapping his arms around her body and grabbing the base of her arms like a sumo wrestling, he jerked and pushed to try and throw her off balance- but she too grabbed at his waist as the two wrestled for a moment- And just as she tipped him over he kicked off of her and landed, panting.
And thus it was the others in this turns turn.
The doppelganger waved her attack, and opted just to try to fly into the air with Cody, to carry him off to have an honorable duel of fates.
[Opposed Grapple Checks!]
[Cody: 19+15= 36! Doppelganger: 9+20=29!]
[Cody Wins!]
The doppelganger began moving with Cody attached-no, Cody was moving with the doppelganger attached as he dragged her the rest of the distance like an English rugby player from the 1800s with three other players on his back.
Cody reached the crab that was holding T, turning his head towards her, he spoke, "I'm dirty, please wash me too…" he said in monotone, and…
[Hitting: 26][Attack Check: 17+11=28, Attack Success!]
Without looking away, he slammed his knee into the doppelganger's gut, causing her to grunt as Cody drained her life essence.
[Damage Roll: 6+5=11 Damage!]
[Damage Total: 11!-196=185HP!]
[Healing: 10+52=62HP!]
"No! Don't touch him!" the doppelganger ordered.
[Opposed Diplomacy Checks!]
[Cody: 16+17=33!, Doppelganger: 5+4=9!, Cody Wins!]
"Be sure to wash her as well…" Cody deadpanned, before shifting his attention towards the doppleganger, "How long do you think you can last? Longer than me? Lets rock."
The crab didn't have a choice.
To grab Cody, she had to grab the doppelganger too. The rules simply didn't allow it any other way.
Thanks to the shitty and odd way grappling was worded, she would technically grab them both. And before you spout 'Oh, but GM, that doesn't make any sense, doesn't your word go over the rules?'
Yes.
And I will allow this galaxy brain play.
And thus, the crab girl took her turn.
[Grapple Touch Attack: Autosuccess]
[Grapple Checks!]
[Crab Girl A: 15+23=38, Doppelganger: 15+20=35, Crab Girl A wins!]
[Constrict Activate!]
[Opposed Grapple Checks: Crab Girl A 15+23=38, Cody 19+17=36, Doppelganger: 15+20=35]
[Damage Roll: Cody: 1+15=16!, Doppelganger: 6+15=21!]
[Damage Total:]
[Cody: 16-62HP=46HP!]
[Doppelganger: 21-185=164HP!]
The doppelganger growled in both anger and pain as the crab latched onto them and hoisted them into the air, yelling, "Put us down right this second!"
The crab counted as two, Cody and the doppelganger counted as one each, the maximum allowed people in a grapple was four. Thus, T popped out of the crab's grasp.
"You're going to die in here, and I'm going to use your soul to survive," Cody smirked, "Any last words, lass?"
"I never took you as an underhanded coward, but now I've changed my mind!"
And then it was Crab girl B's turn, remember her?
[Hitting: 21][Attack Check: 6+14=20!, Failure!]
The dice seem to, given they just fucked her over.
Luka ducked drunkenly under her angry swipe, his body flagging from being basically 6/7ths fucking dead.
And then it was T's turn...
[Inspiration Rolled: Defensive Rebuke!]
And suddenly the doppelganger felt a glare pierce her.
[Iron Guards Glare Activated!]
"Hate to interrupt your flirting- but-" T reared his longsword back, having drew it the second he was let go, and swung at the Doppelganger "-will you fuck off and die!" he yelled.
[Defensive Rebuke Activated]
[Hitting: 21][Attack Check: 18+15=33!, Success!]
[Damage Roll: 4+11=15!]
[Knock Down Activated!]
[Opposed Strength Checks: 12+10=22, 2+11=13, T Wins!]
[Hitting: 21][Attack Roll: 15+15+4(Prone)=34. Success!]
[Damage Roll: 6+11=17!]
[Damage Total: 32!-164HP=132HP!]
With a crack the Doppelganger was...literally nailed into the beach.
Half her body was just embedded into the sand, T's blade having slammed into her shoulder and digging deep and blood splattered all around.
Safe to say the Crab girl A was having a cleanliness OCD aneurysm.
And then the turn order shifted to Cody...
Cody presented his hands to the doppelganger that struggled in the crab's grasp as they morphed and changed-his fingernails grew into claws.
But you see, these weren't claw attacks.
They were rake attacks, and rake attacks can be used in a grapple for free.
[Opposed Grapple Checks!]
[Crab Girl A: 9+23=32, Cody: 19+15=34, Doppelganger: 3+20=23, Doppelganger Failed!]
The doppelganger's attempt to break away from the grapple had failed, so instead of trying to escape, she opted to try and pull the grapplers-as that was a move action and she already spent her standard.
[Opposed Grapple Checks!]
[Crab Girl A: 14+23=37, Cody: 7+15=22, Doppelganger: 1+20=21, Doppelganger Failed!]
Her struggling was futile, and was halted when something struck her in the back…
[Damage Roll: 3+1=4 Damage!]
[Damage Total: 4-132HP=128HP!]
It was Cody's returning dagger.
Which was then aided by Cody unleashing a flurry of hell onto the woman's body.
[Hitting: 26][Attack Checks: 1+11+4(Prone)=16, 20+11+4(Prone)=36, 8+11+4(Prone)=23, Fail CRIT Fail!]
The doppelganger moved her arms to defend herself from the flurry best should could, but one of the rakes did a number on her face, which made her fall silent and stare blankly.
[Damage Roll! 4+5=9!x2=18!]
[Damage Total: 18-128=110HP!]
[Healing: 10+46HP=56HP!]
Luka felt tired as he stared at the injured, but much more energized foe...and decided to use his head, like T does, but also not like T does in the sense of headbutting people.
He fucking 20 feet scooted his ass away, drawing his shield and engaging a [Total Defense] Standard Action.
And thus he provoked an attack of Opportunity.
[Hitting: 28][Attack Check: 5+14=19, Failure!]
As he turned and fucking fled for his life, he swung his shield hard and at an angle, smacking away the crab girls brutish swing as he rolled away and to his feet, then ended up...next to T and the group, panting as he stood next to the boy.
And before they could speak...it was the crabs turns.
And thus, it was Crab Girl A's turn, who had a little bit to think about the situation and…
[Opposed Grapple Checks]
[Crab Girl A: 3+23=26, Cody: 19+15=34!, Cody Wins!]
The crab began to release her claw to drop both Cody and the doppleganger, but Cody quickly dropped his arms down and held it closed.
GM RULING ACTIVATE!
[Opposed Grapple Checks]
[Cody: 14+15=29, Doppelganger: 4+20=24, Cody wins!]
Cody pressed the claw together so hard he prompted a constrict attack on himself and the doppleganger.
[Damage Rolls:]
[Cody: 8+15=23!, Doppelganger: 8+15=23!]
[Damage Total:]
[Cody: 23-56HP=33HP!]
[Doppelganger: 23!-110HP=87HP!]
[Healing: 10+33=43HP!]
Cody had also channeled his [Soul Drain] ability through the crab's claw, taking the Doppelganger's lifeforce for himself.
"I repeat," Cody spoke, "You're going to die in here, whether this crab likes it or not."
And thusly it was Crab girl B's turn.
Pissed as she was, she wanted that boy to feel the dread of her strike...so she approached, walking up to him [Menacingly...] as she reared her claw up- somehow as the second plated guy looked at her with that glare that it'd make it harder to hit him…
But she didn't care.
And so she swung, Luka wouldn't be able to stay conscious after this as he desperately dodged towards T instinctively...
[Hitting: 28][Attack Check: 17+14-4(Stance)=27, Failure!]
Luka felt he was about to die...and then like a force killing intent burst out...and her attack wavered slightly to the side…
The side of his body opposite of T.
He felt her claw skid across his helmet, the metal thing ringing as he stumbled...and was caught by T.
"...I'm not standing for that you bitch." T said with an unholy rage, "Luka!" T yelled, moving the boy to stand on his own as he threw his longsword to the ground.
And then he said a familiar line as inspiration rolled through him…
[Inspiration Rolled!: Mountain Hammer!]
T held his turn, and matched it to Cody's- this was outside of the rules but well…
DM didn't give a shit, this was gonna be rad.
"LIKE A FALLING AVALANCHE!" T yelled, rearing his fist back, and Luka just understood what he meant.
"With the WEIGHT!" Luka followed, his stance flowing and matching T's like it was natural to him- he'd lowkey watched T do this before, and practiced like a dork in the bathroom a couple of times doing the chant.
"AND FURY!" T roared, the duo pointing at the Crab girls gut like it was a target for a homerun.
"OF THE MOUNTAIN!" The yelled together, their stances widening and crouching as they coiled their bodies up for one hell of an attack.
"Mountain…" The duo said quietly...then burst into a blur of movement!
[Mountain Hammers Activated!]
[Hitting: 20][Attack Checks: T 14+14=28!, Luka: 16+14-7(Power Attack)=23!, DOUBLE SUCCESS!]
[Damage Rolls!: 2+(9)(MH)+9=20!, 2+(8)(MH)+6+14(Power Attack)=30!]
[Damage Total: 50!-39HP=-11HP!]
"HAMMER!" the two roared as they slammed their fists side by side right into her stomach, the metal clad hands digging deep into her gut as her organs were pulped and the front of her body torn apart- the force so great her entire body flew back, arcing into the air and crashing right into the water- her body floating to the surface in a circle of red as the two roared at this victory together.
There was a lot of yelling and roaring this encounter, but hey, being hopped up on pain, adrenaline, and more fear and anger then imaginable kinda drains a dude of witty or nuanced sounds and dialogue.
And thusly, it was the Doppelgangers and Cody's side by side but not really sometimes turn.
The doppelganger-
Suddenly grew into large size, forcing Cody out of the grapple before…
[Attack of Opportunity!]
[Hitting: 26][Attack Check: Cody 1+11=12, Failed!]
[Hitting: 26][Attack Check: T 16+14=30, Success!]
[Hitting: 26][Attack Check: Luka 7+14=21, Failure!]
Now, you may think T only got one attack of opportunity...but she was going upwards, and on the Z axis goes through two of T's threatened squares, triggering his [Combat Reflexes].
[Attack of Opportunity!]
[Hitting: 26][Attack Check: T 20+14=34, CRITICAL SUCCESS!]
[Damage Rolls: 1+9=10!, 3+9=12x2=24!]
[KNOCK DOWN ACTIVATED!]
[Opposed Strength Rolls: T 7+10=17, DG 11+18=29, Doppelganger wins!]
[Damage Total: 34!-87HP=53HP!]
Shooting into the sky, the crab not wanting to hold her, she gracefully dodged through their attacks- well, until the wide one leapt up...and slammed his fist into her gut-the boy crouched as he yelled some gibberish along the lines of "SHIN-" a body par- then he spun around midair- wait no his foot was on the crab girls head- and slammed his other fist into her chin, "-SHO-" her teeth clattering as blood seeped out the sides of her mouth, he spun and pushed up, finishing the attack name "-RYUKEN!", the finish of the move sent her a bit faster upwards- she eventually got to the tip of her movement, and staring down at the mess of the battle below her, cradling her jaw with her hand to make sure nothing broke.
T landed with a "WOO!" throwing his hands in the air as he dropped down from the crabs head- ah, maybe that was a cinematic thing and the DM stopped him from eating attacks of opportunity from it?
Nice.
Nonetheless it was then Crab A's turn.
And well, she was now Punished Crab, a girl denied her sister.
Pissed off beyond measure, she turned to T, and T belatedly realized something.
She probably had two natural attacks and he wasn't ten feet away from her.
"Oh FU-"
[Hitting 21][Attack Checks: 20+14=34, 8+14=22, CRITICAL SUCCESS! Success]
[Damage Rolls: 1+15=16x2=32, 2+15=17]
[Damage Total: 49!-48HP=-1HP! (10 Delayed, Consciousness Sustained]
T remarked in his head that this is how it feels to be hit by a car, or his [Mountain Hammer].
Either way, the strike came with the weight and fury of a fucking meteorite, slamming into him his brain jarred around like it was playing pinball and he wondered if his bones were dusted as he slid backwards- and would have slid backwards for many, many more feet…
But as his eyes rolled back into his head, consciousness leaving him instantly…
He Refused.
His back bumped into an invisible wall- about 2.5ish feet away from where he was standing, his body stumbling forward as he slammed his foot down and held, not succumbing to the blackness of unconsciousness…
And thusly, his inspiration filled him.
[Inspiration Rolled: White Raven Tactics, Defensive Rebuke!]
Guess he wasn't that lucky, but either way he spoke "Cody…" he said, drawing his friends attention to him- and then their eyes met, and Cody saw White Raven's in the plated man's eyes as he stepped to the other side of the behemoth of an enemy and reared his own fist back.
And for cool factor, his, Cody's and Luka's turn all happened at the same time.
[Hitting: 20][Attack Checks: Cody 10+9+2(Flanking)=21, 10+9+2(Flanking)=21, 17+9+2(Flanking)=28, 10+9+2(Flanking)=21, 15+9+2(Flanking)=26, 15+4+2(Flanking)=21, 14+4+2(Flanking)=20, 10+9+2(Flanking)=21, 10+9+2(Flanking)=21, 4+9+2(Flanking)=15, 16+9+2(Flanking)=27, 4+9+2(Flanking)=15 13+4+2(Flanking)=19 14+4+2(Flanking)=20, Success, Success, Success, Success, Success, Success, Failure, Success, Success, Failure, Success, Failure, Failure, Failure.]
[Hitting: 20][Attack Checks: Luka 14+14-7(Power Attack)=21,15+14+-7(Power Attack)=22, Success, Success!]
[Hitting: 20][Attack Check: T 10+14+2(Furious Counterstrike)=26, Success!]
[Damage Rolls: You get it, she's fuckin dead.]
[Damage Total: No, STOP, It's over, there's nothing left you sick fucks. NOTHING!]
The trio surrounded her in a triangle as she looked back and forth, wondering what they were planning...and then they reared their fists back...and did the Ora Ora thing with BOTH hands.
In all reality, T and Luka just kept her still, slamming her back alternatingly...into Cody.
Cody before he began was a man…
And after he began?
He became a fucking tornado of pain, or a really pissed off blender.
Arms, legs, claws, headbutts, elbows, knees, and nunchaku swings came in an unending barrage of death as blood and viscera were tossed about everywhere, and after everything was said and done?
There was literally nothing left but red mist, blood, and some internal body chunks that nobody not even a forensic scientist could identify accurately.
And then T's eyes rolled into the back of his head and he fell face first into the ground.
[Linebreak Motherfucker]
[Encounter Won! Congratulations!]
[Enemies Defeated: 2x Monstrous Crabs, 1x Doppelganger!]
[XP Gained: 8867!]
[Treasure Value: 17875!]
{Items!: Gauntlets of Ogre Power, Cloak of Resistance, Bag of Holding (II), 2000gp (In the bag)!}
[LEVEL UP!]
[T: Lvl 7 - Lvl 8 HP: 67+9=76!]
[Cody: Lvl 7 - Lvl 8 HP: 68+11=79!]
[Luka: Lvl 7 - Lvl 8 HP:67+10+8(Retroactive)=84!]
[T has gained Steely Resolve 15!]
[Cody has gained Polymorph Self!]
[Luka has gained Martial Study as a Bonus Feat!]
[T: 18Str - 20Str!]
[C: 16Dex - 18Dex!]
[L: 14Con - 16Con!]
[Linebreak Motherfucker]
A crackling fire, the sounds of the forest behind them, and god damn it, it's too fuckin early to set up camp!
Oh, but Alice did nothing but complain for the last few miles, talking about how she's 'too hungry to go on' and 'hasn't eaten properly in days' (despite munching down Luka's food like posh kush).
She sat there, arms crossed, staring blankly at her now empty bowl of stew as the crew around her bantered.
"You really like being grabbed by monsters, Cody," Luka narrowed his eyes, "Heretic."
"That's right, go around preaching 'love all monsters' without once getting your dick wet, virgin fucking cuck," Cody shot back.
"You're talking like someone who wants to get turned into an ant," Luka gripped angel halo-then dropped it when it made a weird moaning noise.
Cody chuckled, and picked up his bedroll, walking over to his tent to lay it out.
T sighed "Luka I know your stressed but he's not wrong per se, not wholly right, but not wrong." he said ruffling the kids hair.
Luka looked over at T, quirking a brow, "Am I not 'bantering' right?"
"Wait you do that?" T said confused "Huh, thought you were taking aggression out on monsterfucker 9000 over there." he said, jerking a thumb towards Cody
Luka was visibly confused by how T talks, but that was normal, "No, that's what the monsters we run into are for."
"Ha, you little bloodthirsty hellion." T said, wrapping an arm around Luka's neck and giving him a noogie as the two laughed, though...T's body felt tense, and after Luka wrestled out of T's grasp with a lucky [Grapple Check].
"You okay?" Luka said, tilting his head, having noticed it.
T rubbed the back of his neck "I...I'm not really at liberty to speak with my boot full of noodle dogs." T said out loud, only Cody would really get what he means as Luka went into asking him what he meant, to which he danced around it with as much skill as he always did when 'Not Lying at all totally, no bluff checks here.'
Cody rolled out his bedroll and looked back over at the camp, the two bros having a bro talk, and the angry snake woman that was keeping them prisoner-eventually building up to elemental superpowers, yes, but still prisoners.
'Boot full of noodle dogs?'
Cody blinked.
'Snakes?'
Alice looked up at T and Luka, 'standing' up and announcing, "I'm hungry."
T's back was to her, but Luka and Cody could see his clenched fists, even if his face didn't show it.
"And not for Luka's cooking, though I wouldn't complain," she continued, "I'm hungry for some human~."
Cody swallowed, and started back towards the fire, walking past T and Luka; straight to Alice.
"Well…" Cody dug his hands into his dirty hoodie's pocket, "I'm hungry for some thighs, so I think we have a common interest."
Alice blinked, then smirked, "I thought I was above a tent in the woods," she put up a hand, "though I guess I was wrong…"
While she really wanted to use all of her toys, she'd take what was given to her; Cody had explained her wrongdoings on forcing people so directly into it reasonably...even if that's what got her going (as well as most other monsters), Cody was a good listener and could at least act like it wasn't his choice.
And her tail had become legs.
That was for another time. Tonight, just like back at the Sutherland Inn, she wanted to melt away and be pampered, then watch Cody as he got the same treatment…
Alice then realized how odd her feelings were…
God damn rolls.
Cody walked up to her and wrapped an arm around her waist, planting a kiss on her cheek-making sure he and T made eye contact as they started to walk off.
T looked sorry and guilty, but he mouthed 'thank you' nonetheless as he looked away, curling up into a ball as he stared into the fire.
Luka meanwhile saw the expression, but couldn't read an expression to save his life, so he was just confused- also he couldn't tell that those words were mouthed, so he just thought T was flapping his mouth.
T waited patiently, waiting until they were probably in the middle of it, then spoke up quietly, "I'm...Luka I'm scared." T said sighing
"Wait- what? You, are?" Luka said, having, well, a certainly bloated sense of opinion about T, and by extension Cody.
Review casefile: Dragon Assbeatin' for the reason why.
"Luka I, I am." T said seriously, untensing his body as he adopted a less uncomfortable sitting position.
"Why?" The boy asked, prodding T to go forward with this as he felt vague confusion, but also worry about all this, and it showed.
"Luka...I, I'm scared for you, and I guess...me too, but mostly you." he shrugged, "I, that shit back in the tavern really threw everything back into my face, about...about everything, about where we are, about who we're with. We're prisoners, we're cattle Luka, that's...I'm really not sure Alice sees us any other way aside from Cody, and even Cody's probably just, just her favorite fucktoy. I…" T paused, taking a deep shaking inhale and exhale.
"I've...put a lot of importance into my firsts in my head, my...my first everything when it comes to that y'know? I just...and, and your firsts too! That shit should be fucking special y'know?" T said throwing his hands in the air "But one flip of a switch and I think, I think…" he crossed his arms "I think we'll be gone, that she'll just...use her fucked up monster shit and destroy us, destroy what makes us ourselves, change us, addict us. Luka…" T said, gulping.
"I, I have family back home, and friends, and, and I don't want to go back and hurt them by becoming some, some freak." he said shivering "And I, I think she'd do that to me and not even think it's wrong, not even view me as a person and that's, that's just so, so fucked up." T said, venting his thoughts mindlessly, maybe he was talking in circles, he didn't really know, it just...came out.
"I'm…" T ended it with the start…"I'm scared Luka." he said, his voice tinged with desperation.
Luka, the friendless boy aside from these two, only really knew how to do one thing…
The two hugged in a pretty normal embrace since they weren't in full plate.
[Linebreak Motherfucker]
[Name: Tristan]
[Race: Human]
[Class: Crusader Lvl 8]
[Attributes: STR 20(26), DEX 12, CON 16, INT 14, WIS 12, CHA 14(16)]
[HP: 76]
[AC: 21, Touch 11, Flatfooted 20]
[Initiative: -5]
[Speed: 20ft]
[TAB: +16/+11 Melee, +9/+4 Ranged]
[Saves: Fort 10, Reflex 1, Will 7]
[Weapons:]
{(Bastard Sword+2): 1d10+12+2}
{(Long Sword+2): 1d8+(8/12)+2}
{(Masterwork Bastard Sword): 1d10+12+1}
{(Gauntlet+1): 1d3+(8/12)}
[Armor:]
{Full Plate +1: +9 AC, Max Dex 1, Check Penalty -6}
{Ring of Protection +1: +1 AC}
{Towershield +1(Unequipped): +5 AC, Max Dex 2, Check Penalty -10}
[Notable Skills:]
{Balance = 8}
{Climb = 13}
{Diplomacy = 18}
{Intimidate = 18}
{Jump = 14}
{History = 13}
{Spot = 6}
{Listen = 6}
{Sense Motive = 6}
{Bluff = 8}
{Search = 7}
{Survival = 5}
{Swim = 12}
{Tumble = 6}
[Personal Magic Items:]
{Belt of Giant's Strength (+4)}
+4 to Strength when worn
{Gauntlets of Ogre Power}
+2 to Strength when worn
{Cloak of Charisma (+2)}
+2 to Charisma when worn
{Feather Token (Tree)}
Spawns a tree from token instantaneously
[Feats:]
{Steely Resolve 15}
Damage is delayed in this pool until the end of the round, limit based on level
{Furious Counterstrike}
Bonus attack and damage based off delayed damage pool, 1-9 = +1, 10-14 = +2, etc.
{Indomitable Soul}
Charisma bonus to Will Saves
{Zealous Surge}
Once per day reroll saving throw, must take new result
{Smite 1/Day}
Once per day add Charisma to attack, and Initiator Level to Damage.
{Combat Expertise}
Trade BAB for AC
{Improved Trip}
+4 on Trip Attempts, No AoO triggered when Tripping
{Knock Down}
Free Trip Attempt if at least 10 damage is dealt
{Able Learner}
All Cross Class Skill Ranks Cost the Same Skill Points as Class Skill Ranks
{Improved Grapple}
Do not provoke AoO when attempting a grapple, +4 to Grapple Checks
{Combat Reflexes}
Extra AoO's based off Dexterity Mod
[Maneuvers 8, Readied 5, Granted 2, Stances 3]
{WR: White Raven Tactics}
Swift Action: Give another player another turn.
{DS:Defensive Rebuke}
Standard Action: An enemy affected by this Maneuver provoke Attacks of Opportunity when they attempt to attack at an Ally while in the Crusader's Threat Range.
{DS: Revitalizing Strike}
Standard Action: 3d6+Initiator Level HP restored on hit.
{SD: Bonesplitting Strike}
Standard Action: When an enemy is hit by this maneuver, they lose 2 Constitution.
{SD: Mountain Hammer}
Standard Action: +2d6 bonus damage, ignores hardness and DR of target hit
X{WR: Covering Strike}X
Standard Action: An enemy hit by this maneuver cannot make AoO for 3 turns.
X{SD: Charging Minotaur}X
Full Round Action: Perform Bullrush, on success deal 2d6+Str damage.
X{WR: Battle Leader's Charge}X
Full Round Action: Perform a charge attack, +10 damage if attack lands
(DS: Iron Guards Glare)
Opponents user Threatens get a -4 to attack if they don't target the user, opponents intrinsically understand the effects of the stance when under its effect.
(DS: Thicket of Blades)
Any movement period provokes an AoO from the Crusader using this stance.
(WR: Tactics of the Wolf)
Allies that flank an enemy with a Crusader in this stance gain half the Crusader's Initiator level in damage to their attacks.
[Race: Human]
[Class: Expert Lvl 2, Warrior Lvl 6]
[Attributes: STR 20-24 DEX 18-22, CON 16-20, INT 12, WIS 16, CHA 14]
[HP: 79-?]
[AC: 22, Touch 19, Flatfooted 18]
[Initiative: +4]
[Speed: 50ft]
[TAB: +12/7 Melee, +11/6 Ranged]
[Saves: Fort 8, Reflex 6, Will 9]
[Weapons:]
{Unarmed Strike: 2d6}
[Notable Skills:]
{Bluff: 8}
{Diplomacy: 17}
{Intimidate: 12}
{Sense Motive: 12}
{Survival: 10}
{Hide: 8}
[Feats:]
{Monk Abilities}
{Improved Grapple}
+4 Grapple, No AoOs on Grapples
{Able Learner}
All Skills are Class Skills
{Flurry of Blows}
Able to make an extra attack at -2BAB
{Soul Drain 2}
Drain HP on successful attack (x2 on crit)
{Soul Strength}
Stats increase as health does
{Close-Quarters Fighting}
Prevent Grapples on AoO, always get AoO on Grapples
{Morphic Body}
Be the fucking strong
{Morphic Weapons}
Grow natural weaponry
{Polymorph Self}
Scary Monsters and Super Creeps