Mission X Part 10
Dancing Disaster
by
Sailor Janus
plus
Final's Fatality
"I think I'm going to pass out. I can't believe they confiscated our food and left us with this sloop!" Duo grumbled from his chair at the small round table where he and his friends were having their lunch break. Taking a fork full of tanish gunk that slightly resembled macaroni and cheese he flung it at the ceiling where it promptly attached itself to the ceiling panel. "Doubt that baby's gonna come down."
"At least someone is amused," Wufei muttered, shoving the tray to the center of the table. He was still very pissed off about being forced to wear a long cargo skirt.
Trowa squinted at the lunch under the artificial lighting having still not grown accustomed to having his longs bangs removed from his sensitive green eyes. "It's really bright in here. DJ, may I borrow your sunglasses? This lighting is hurting my eyes."
Duo froze momentarily as well as the other boy band members. After a few seconds of silence, the braided-haired teen handed over the dark shades. "Sure man. It's gonna take a while to get used to not having your hair in your face, huh."
"The light plus the sequins on Chase's shirt are really blinding," Trowa explained, earning a glare from the Perfect Soldier.
"I wish they'd serve us some better food. Even Du- uh DJ cooks better than this," Quatre sighed, joining his uneaten tray of food to the center of the table as well.
"Yeah......Hey!"
Heero snapped his plastic fork in two, with a stern look on his stony face. "We still have no word on why we must submit ourselves to this kind of torment for the mission. We're probably going to have to hold out for a month."
"Evers, are you certain all of this is worth it? It feels more like torture to me," Wufei said as he crossed his arms over his chest.
"There has to be a reason for this," the blonde argued, pushing up the eyeglasses which kept slipping down his nose.
"Yeah, but the question is what? If we don't get some answers soon, I'm gonna to walk," Duo said, pushing the tray of uneaten food to the center of the table.
Shaking his head the Perfect Soldier firmly stated, "We can not 'walk' DJ. This is a mission and we must follow through with it. I suspect this is only training. Apparently to do what we need to, we must be a boy band."
"But isn't there a better way than having to deal with that psychopath, Cyn?! MY DAMN HAIR IS PINK!"
"Calm down DJ. It's not that bad," Quatre tried to reassure his friend who was still quite displeased by the sudden change in wardrobe.
"Not bad? NOT BAD?! Look at me! I look a freak!"
Grumbling Wufei muttered, "Do you think any of us like what we are wearing? I'm wearing a SKIRT! Sharp can't keep his pants from falling off. Gene over there looks like half preppy boy and half walking vomit and Evers looks like a new Clubbing Ken doll."
"Hn. My room is glittery pink with a disco ball," Heero evenly said throwing a sharp death glare at Duo. "You have it no worse than the rest of us. Live with it."
Duo instead nodded, crossing his arms before sulking through the rest of their break as the others made very little conversation, stared at the wall, or simply fell asleep on the table.
"Boys! It's time!" George shouted startling the group of five in the process who either jerked their heads up, or threw glares at the cheerful, brightly dressed man.
Rising to their feet, the five teens tried not to groan as they thought of what the choreographer was planning for them to do next. Considering what Stan and Cyn put them through, they had a bad feeling it would be hell.
*~*~*~*
All right gentlemen, since that disgusting display you demonstrated for me yesterday, I have done a lot of thought and determined that as my colleague, Stan so simply put, we need to go back to basics," Dan crisply said, snatching a stack of papers from the desk. "Here is the agenda." Quickly he thrust a paper at each pilot's face. Turning back to his desk, he made a face. "I forgot the music in my office. You may look over the agenda in my absence. I shall return shortly." With that, he briskly left, leaving the boy band members to glance over what exactly they were about to do.
"He's making us square dance?!" all five teens said simultaneously in disbelief.
"Oh the humanity!" Duo shouted, staring wide-eyed at the paper.
"Injustice! How could he do this to us?" Wufei grumbled, appearing as though he wished to shred the agenda.
Heero glared at the paper with enough intensity, the others were surprised that it didn't burst into flames. "After that is the electric slide, and the Macarena."
"Actually, square dancing is second. The Hokey Poky is first thing we have to do. It was half cut off when he was making copies," Trowa sighed.
"WHAT?!" the four boys reread the paper and actually groaned.
"Welcome to hell. Please tell me you brought a gun He- Chase," the braided haired pilot said. Unfortunately, all Duo received for an answer was a simple head shake. "Then let the torture begin!"
At that moment, Dan returned with his chosen music, popping it into the tape player and pressed play. "Now, boys, you need to listen carefully, and follow the directs exactly."
As an irritating jingle began a giddy voice blasted through the speakers. "You put your left hand in, pull your left hand out, you put your left hand in and shake it all about. Now do the Hokey Pokey and turn yourself about, that's what it's all about!"
Very unenthusiastically, the five pilots followed the orders cheerfully explained through the song, wishing the world could end at this moment. Unfortunately, even this simple dance had its difficulties. Once again Trowa was losing his pants whenever he moved or breathed for that matter. Heero once again was having trouble with his large boots as well as the fact the long necklaces were smacking him in the face, annoying the trigger happy teen immensely. Every time Duo caught sight of his braid, he'd start grumbling, forgetting what he was exactly doing. Wufei was having difficulty moving around in the restrictive garment and Quatre, was tripping over the bottom of is too large khakis as well as keeping his eye glasses on his face.
Sighing, Dan nodded and switched to the Macarena instead of square dancing. "This one will help give you sense of rhythm. Do exactly as I do."
Suddenly a song with a lot of base and fast talking Mexican singers blasted through the speakers. Swishing his hips the blonde-haired choreographer stuck his left hand out palm down and did the same with his right before flipping the left over, then the right. Next he crossed his left arm across his chest then his right, brought his left up to his head followed by his right, before crossing the left across his stomach and once again the right before lastly, bringing his left hand to his hips, followed by his right before doing one clap, jumping to a 35 degree angle and repeated the process. The pilots stared stupefied. That was actually dance?!
"Gentlemen, you are not dancing."
Surprisingly, gradually they got better, Trowa manage to tuck the waist band of his pants into his boxers which prevented them from falling down. Heero threw off the annoying necklaces and tightened his boots during the break. Duo shoved his braid down the back of his shirt so he didn't have to look at the pink streaks. Wufei got used to the skirt and pretended he was wearing kendo pants and Quatre rolled up the bottom of his pants legs and finally took off the eye glasses as well.
Exchanging glances, the five boy band members reluctantly did the bizarre dance before being introduced to the world of the electric slide and square dancing complete with cowboy hats.
Finally the day ended and five exhausted boy band members dragged their aching feet towards their hideous new apartment with a disgusted look on each of their faces. Oddly, upon reaching the door, they noted there was an envelope talked in the crack under the door. Frowning, Heero bent down and picked it up, carefully opening it and began reading the note aloud.
I apologize for leaving you without light.
Communication never existed.
This job is not what it seems to be.
Continue your first appointed duty.
In a month, more will be revealed.
Until, then hold on with all your might
"Cleaver. It's in song lyrics in case someone else would have picked it up," Trowa nodded.
Grinning, the braided-haired teen scratched his head. "I guess this is a real after all. And here I thought this was just to punish us for something we didn't do."
"But we have to do this for a full month? I suppose we really do have to become a boy band. Hmm, I under what's going to happen in a month? Are they going to send us another letter or maybe someone to help us?" Quatre wondered as Heero unlocked the door.
"Whatever it is, can we really improve in a month?" Wufei as he entered the house last, and swung the brightly colored door closed before locking it. Raising an eyebrow he added, "Can we actually LIVE in this place for a month without losing our sanity?"
"What sanity Wu-man? I think it left screaming out the door the first time we came here," Duo shrugged before walking to room. Suddenly he heard Heero growl from his own room next door. Spinning on his heel, he headed to the room next door only to find the lights off and the Perfect Soldier standing the middle of the room with his arms crossed. Frowning Duo glanced up before trying to mask a snicker.
"I am NOT sleeping in here. I'll take the couch as I previously stated," Heero evenly, said, pulling out a T-shirt and sweat pants from the closet before heading off to the bathroom.
Once Heero left, Duo burst out laughing. "Heero has an entire solar system on his ceiling..... and the glitter on the walls glows in the dark revealing peace signs!"
Emerging out of the bathroom, completely dressed into a green T-shirt and black sweat pants, the Perfect Soldier glowered, and decided to inspect what condition the self-proclaimed Shinigami's room was in. Opening the door in the darkened room, he slightly smirked at all the glow-in-the-dark eyes covering the walls and ceiling. "At least I'm not going to be watched as I sleep, Duo."
"Huh?" Sharply, the Deathscythe Hell pilot turned and fled for his own room. Freezing, his jaw dropped. "There is NO way I'm sleeping in here! I'll take the floor in the living room." Grumbling he flipped the lights on and searched for something in the closet to sleep in.
Trowa, Quatre, and Wufei were sitting in the at the table discussing the mission in much more comfortable clothes as Heero approached them. "Any surprises in your rooms?"
"My alarm clock plays that weak song, Eye of the Tiger," the Chinese teen muttered, now dressed in a black tank top and white sweat pants. "I also have glow in the dark battle scenes on my walls and ceiling."
Trowa nodded, trying to remove the gel from his bangs sitting in a red sweat shirt and black sweat pants. "Mine plays Queen's 'We will rock you' and my walls have glow in the dark sports scenes."
"My alarm clock plays some old pop band called Nsync's Pop and I have glow in the dark musical notes on my ceiling," the blonde lastly said adjusting the gray long sleeved T-shirt teamed up with dark blue sweat pants.
"Lucky," Duo grumbled, walking out of his room dressed in orange sweat pants and white T-shirt. Apparently he didn't have too much to choose from. "I have glowing eyes and Heero has an entire solar system and peace signs. I don't think we even WANT to know what our alarm clocks plays!"
"Mine plays some annoying song called, "Who let the Dogs Out," the 01 pilot admitted.
Pouting, the braided-haired turn went back into his room since curiosity was about to kill him, not to mention he needed some blankets and a pillow. Staring at the cheetah print alarm clock, Duo sighed and pressed the button discovering that it played 'Wild Thing' "Figures," he grumbled, snatching his comforter and pillow off the bed. Stomping back into the kitchen he mumbled, "Someone don't forget to wake me up. I am not going to be awaken to the sound of Wild Thing!" Finding a clear place on the floor, Duo spread the comforter out and plopped down. "Night."
Exchanging glances the other boy band members decided it'd be best for them to go to sleep as well. After all, they needed all the rest they could get. Could they really last a month as a boy band, or will they have to last even longer? Will they even improve? Time will tell.
*~*~*~*
Author's Notes: Ack! Writer's block is murder! This was the most painful chapter to write because of it! Anyway, the next chapter, I'm speeding things up! So a month will have passed. Oh do I have a lot planned for our favorite boy band ^_^
Stay tuned!
And Now...
Finals' Fatality
by
Sailor Janus and Panthera
::The Gundam Pilots walked in a heated rage toward an apartment door::
Quatre: Do you think we have the right place?
Heero: Hn. This is where her files state she is residing at.
Duo: Now it's time for the great Shinigami to work his magic! ::rubs his hands together and then withdraws a lock pick from his hair::
Wufei: You're picking a lock Maxwell, not creating a miracle.
Duo: Shut up Wu-man! ::lightly brushes the door with his hand and the door to their utter amazement swings open::
Gundam Pilots: OO;;;
Trowa: She left the door unlocked?
Wufei: Always thought that baka onna was insane.
Heero: Makes our job easier. Let's go in. ::quietly stalks inside the apartment as the other four follow::
::Pausing at a door they exchange glances. With a swift move, Heero kicked the door open::
Panthera: ::startled she jumps up and flips over in the chair in front of the computer:: Oo;;;;; What the hell?!
Gundam Pilots: OO;;;;
Quatre: I think we have the wrong room. Sorry Miss. ^_^;;
Duo: Uh yeah. We're looking for a basketcase named SJ.
Wufei: Do you where we can find that weak baka onna? She has committed injustice and must suffer.
Panthera: ::blinks:: Um, if you're looking for SJ, she's that shaking mess huddled in the corner over there. ::points to the far side of the room::
Gundam Pilots: ::look where Panthera is pointing:: OO;;;
Heero: Who are you and what happened?
Panthera: I'm Panthera, SJ's friend-
Wufei: Friend? That onna has friends?
Duo: Soooo, how much does she pay you?
Panthera: ::drags her hand down the side of her face and sighs:: You guys really are mean. I thought SJ was just exaggerating.
Duo: Mean? I'm not mean!
Wufei: ::grumbles:: Shut up, Maxwell.
Duo: See! Wu-man is the mean one not me!
Wufei: My name is Wufei!
Quatre: ::tries to avoid the arguing:: So what happened to SJ?
Panthera: She blew a fuse.
Trowa: How?
Panthera: Well it'd be best not mention it around her. She has a tendency to lose it.
Duo: Hasn't she already lost it?
Panthera: Look I don't want to upset my friend. She's calm and quiet right now.
::Gundam Pilots exchange glances::
Trowa: THAT'S calm?
Panthera: It's better than how she was when I found her.
Heero: ::pulls out a gun:: Explain or I'll kill you.
Panthera: OO;;;;;;; Um, when I got here she was babbling incoherently in Spanish.
Heero: Why?
Panthera: ::leans towards Heero's ear and whispers:: She had just finished her finals.
Duo: ::overhears:: Finals?
SJ: OO;;;;;;;; FINALS?! Finals! Finals! No me gusta los gatos queso!
Everyone else: Oo;;;;;
Panthera: Damn you, Maxwell! You set her off again!
Duo: Hey! Only Wu-man can call me that!
Wufei: ::threatening:: Maxwell....
Quatre: Um, what did she just say?
Panthera: My Spanish is a bit rusty but I think she just said she doesn't like cheese cats. ::moves towards the bed where SJ is sitting at the head of, tearing at a blanket and tries to calm her:: It's okay SJ. They're over. Calm down.
SJ: Mi hermana habla con su bano.
Panthera: Oo;;;; Heero, shoot Duo!
Duo: Hey! What'd I do?
Panthera: You started this! You said finals! ::blinks:: Oh no....
SJ: . Tu escribes en los vestidos rosado.
Panthera: . Like hell I do!
Trowa: Some subtitles would be benifical.
Panthera: First she said her sister talks to her bathroom. The second LIE I will not repeat.
Gundam Pilots: Oo;;;
Wufei: Anyone have the number for a good mental institution?
Heero: ::gun pointed at Panthera's head:: You will tell us or I will kill you.
Panthera: She said I write in pink dresses. Okay? Are you happy? ::wipes her eyes::
Quatre: What's wrong with pink?
Panthera: Pink is the devil's color!
Duo: Thank you! Someone finally agrees! ^_^
Heero: ::tries not to smirk::
Panthera: So what are you guys doing here?
Wufei: We're seeking justice over some written torture called Mission X.
Duo: She streaked my hair pink!
Trowa: Gives me pants ten sizes too big.
Wufei: Stuck me in a skirt.
Heero: Made me the clubby boy.
Quatre: Forces us to sing and dance.
SJ: Heero baile con las puertas en calzoncillos rosado para lipices pez a noche.
Panthera: ::facevaults::
Heero: I heard my name. What did she say?
Panthera: Do you promise not to kill the translator?
Heero: Hn.
Panthera: ::tries to keep a straight face:: She said, you dance with doors in pink underpants for fish pencils at night!
Duo: ::bursts out laughing::
Wufei: Oo;;; Then again. Maybe death is more suitable for that nutcase.
Panthera: Don't kill my friend!
Heero: noticing a full two liter bottle of sprite on the floor, picks it up, opens it and dumps the contents over SJ's head, soaking her and her bed in the process::
SJ: ::blinks, sputtering:: Heero you idiot! You wet my bed!
::Duo falls to the floor laughing hysterically as the others try to contain their laughter. Suddenly SJ reverts back to her near catatonic state::
Panthera: Heero, you jerk! She's in hysterics! Getting her wet isn't going to help! She doesn't even know what she is saying. Besides, the soda was warm. You need cold water.
Heero: ::death glares before spinning on his heel and exits the room::
Panthera: Heero come back! Don't wet her bed again!
::Duo rolls on the floor now crying because he is laughing so hard as the others hold their sides, chuckling at the amusing scene as Panthera loses control and falls to the floor, laughing hysterically::
Heero: ::returns a moment later with a huge bucket of ice water::
Duo: Hahahahaha! Heero dances with doors in pink underwear and wets the bed!
Panthera: For fish pencils!
Heero: ::splashes water on Duo and Panthera who each choke on the water before approaching SJ. Without a single thought, dumps the entire bucket over her head::
SJ: OO;;;;;; AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! It's snowing? En la casa?
Duo: ::coughs:: Heero, you got water up my nose! So uncool!
Panthera: I didn't know it was possible to drown on dry land. ::sputters:: As for leaving a complaint with SJ, it'll have to wait because as you can see, she's not here right now.
Trowa: Wait.... wait. What were you doing on SJ's computer?
Panthera: ::sits up:: Working on my story before you guys nearly gave me a heat attack.
Quatre: ::has a bad feeling:: What kind of story?
Panthera: It's a fanfiction..... on you guys.
Pilots: OO;;;;;
Heero: Explain.
Panthera: ::takes a seat at the computer to hide her work:: It's about you guys seeking revenge on SJ.
Duo: Really? Tell us!
Panthera: Well, Heero, has a plan on how to get SJ without her author powers getting in the way.
Wufei: ::sneaks up behind Panthera and reads over her shoulder:: OO;;;; INJUSTICE! YOU BAKA ONNA!
Panthera: /Oh no. I'm dead. I better think of something fast.... Um let's see. How do my author powers work again?/
SJ: Use the force Panthera!
::curious, the other pilots crowd around the computer::
Pilots: OO;;;;
Duo: Not more pink!
Quatre: ::blinks:: Relena as a child?
Trowa: This is scary.
Wufei: Well, this is believable. Maxwell screwed things up.
Heero: ::twitch::
Panthera: Oh no. They're about to lose it. Gotta get rid of Heero's gun. ::snaps fingers and the trigger happy teen's favorite weapon is replaced with a water gun:: ::sighs:: Safe for now.
Heero: ::glares::
Panthera: ::turns to Wufei:: As for you. ::snaps fingers and Wufei becomes a dark-haired Sailor Moon::
Everyone: OO;;;;;
Panthera: Wow! It worked!
Sailor Wufei: . I'm the champion of love and justice, I will punish you! In the name of Nataku! ::does a pose::
Panthera: -_-;; That's scary. ::shudders::
Quatre: I'm having a sense of de ja vu.
Duo: ::snickers:: Hey Wu-man! You're a knock out!
Panthera: ::turns to Duo:: You started all this.
Duo: ::pales:: Uh oh. Don't do anything drastic babe.
Panthera: ::eyes narrow coldly, gritting her teeth:: Don't. Call. Me. Babe! ::snaps her fingers and Duo turns into Chibi Relena from Don't Drink the Water!::
Duo: Eek! I'm wearing pink!
Trowa: ::blinks:: Um, Duo, you're Chibi Relena.
Duo: OO;;;;;; NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Heero: ::hits the floor::
Panthera: ::smirks:: That's so much better. Does anyone want to meet my bad side?
Quatre: Oo;;; THAT'S not your bad side?
Chibi Relena: HEEEEEEEEERRRRRRROOOOOO! ::pounces on the down Perfect Soldier:: Heero. Heero. Heero. Heero. Heero. Heero. Heero. Heeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrroooooooo!
Heero: X.x ::twitch::
Panthera: Oo;;;; That's too weird even for me. ::snaps fingers and Chibi Relena freezes:: Man she's annoying! Uh, sorry Heero.
SJ: Relena come ojos de pollo com las lamparas verde.
Trowa: What?
Panthera: Relena eats chicken eyes with green lamps.
::suddenly a bowl of chicken eyes and green lamps appears in front of Chibi Relena as she unfroze::
Chibi Relena: ::blinks:: Heero! ::proceeds to consume the chicken eyes::
Quatre: ::faints::
Panthera: Oo;;; Wait a minute. I didn't do that. How did that happen?! ::turns away in disgust:: That's nasty! ::snaps her fingers and Duo reappears::
Duo: OO;;;;;;;; ::turns green and races to the bathroom::
Panthera: Don't slam the- ::SLAM!:: door. -_-;;;
SJ: Trowa mira los gatos juegan tenis.
::two cats appear on the bed playing tennis as Trowa mindlessly watches the match::
SJ: Quatre duerme en la cocina.
::Quatre suddenly disappears::
Sailor Wufei: Hey! Where did Quatre go?
Panthera: He's sleeping in the kitchen.
::pounding is heard down the hall::
Duo: ::muffled:: Hey! Let me out! I can't even pick this damn lock! The stupid door knob is broken!
Panthera: -_-;;; I tried to warn him.
Heero: ::glares as he sits up:: You are just as bad as SJ.
Panthera: I didn't know Relena was going to go crazy. Sorry Heero.
::suddenly a loud thud makes everyone in the room jump::
Duo: ::enters the room:: HAHAHAHAHA! I have escaped! Uh, sorry about the door. I kinda had to take it down.
Panthera: It's okay. It needed to be put down.
SJ: YAY! The door from hell is dead!
Duo: Man, this is worse than last time! Uh, why are those cats playing tennis?
Panthera: Because SJ said they were.
Sailor Wufei: Luna and Artemis are playing tennis?!
Everyone else: -_-;;;
Duo: Why are you such a ditz?
Sailor Wufei: ::blinks:: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh! Duo! Why are you soooooo mean to meeeeeeeeeee?!
Heero: ....
Duo: ::gasps::
Panthera: Okay, that's too much. ::snaps fingers and returns Wufei back to normal::
SJ: ::snickers:: ::snaps her fingers and the cats disappear::
Trowa: ::blinks:: What happened?
Quatre: ::from the kitchen:: How did I get in here and WHAT is that on the floor?!
Gundam Pilots: ::exchange glances::
Heero: We'll settle this later.
::pilots bolt out of the door::
Panthera: That was the most fun I've had in a long time. Feel any better SJ?
SJ: ::grins:: Much better.
*~*~*~*~*
SJ's Notes: I think this is even longer than the story chapter! -_-;;;;
I'd like to thank my good friend Panthera whom I wrote this with. Can't wait til we can start our novel together again. ^_^
Be sure to check out her Gundam Wing story "A Doll's Life." I will gladly say that I highly recommend it especially, if you enjoy Don't Drink the Water! and Mission X.
Next time:
I get an earful from the guys and a new cast member for Mission X. I think I like to live dangerously....