The Promise of a Lifetime Chapter 9: Tail of the Hero, a Naruto + Nisekoi/ニセコイ Crossover fanfic

EDIT: 11/28/14

Alright, before we begin, I'd like to sincerely apologize for the time it took to complete this update.

Not only was I busy with schoolwork and other family obligations, I found myself with a major case of Writer's Block. Again.

Thankfully, the worst is over, and I hope I can resume pumping out updates like I used to.

Now, with Writer's Block, it's kinda' weird for me. I CAN write, but it's just uninspired. I don't feel that rush like I normally do, and the writing tends to suffer as a result.

Whenever one of my stories appears to drop in writing quality and just material-wise in general, this is probably the main reason.

Anyway… Nisekoi 149! I love it! It's amazing! #BestGirl!

…

…Ahem.

Yes, since so many chapters have come and gone since the last update went up, I'd effectively be squeezing in 2 months' worth of Author's Notes.

Soooo I'm gonna' do it anyway.

144-145: Awesome! More fluff! JUST CONFESS DAMMIT. And while you're at it Komi, can we get Raku & Marika's dad's names too?

146-148: Hooray for more Ie! Wait, where the hell did she get those? Are...we just gonna' leave it at that? They're just stuck in the trapdoor and… okay.

149: Am I some kind of psychic with this? It would've been a huge help if this chapter had come out before I had that scene written. Tsugumi looks beautiful in this one.

150: Cool that we got full color… I'm kinda' getting bored of Nisekoi, frankly. I hope plot picks up again soon.

OKAY! Now that that's out of the way…

Please enjoy Author's Notes from a month ago! (*laughs nervously*)

EDIT: 11/30/14

Apparently, as I was writing, new information was released alongside the 'Nisekoi: Yomeiri!?' game. Now, we have the girls' official birthdays and blood types. So now I have to go back and change them.

Great.

Here we are everyone. This is the end.

...of the Naruto Manga that is.

It's had a great run. It definitely has. And I've written this chapter to honor that.

Also, those pairings though! That was a crazy huge reveal!

...Fanboy attacks aside...

Fun Fact: I had Japanese cooking videos open throughout writing this chapter… Make of that what you will.

Oh! Did you guys see the Yomeiri updates? Apparently, yet another KamiNomi Seiyuu joins the ranks: Ayana Taketatsu (Ayumi Takahara) as 'Otama', a game-only character.

I definitely plan on putting her in the fic somehow. Maruusha too. That's a promise.

...Hey, would you guys object to me putting Mecha Naruto in?

Also, Nisekoi 143-144! More fluff! And Onodera's Mother is named 'Nanako'! Awesome!

And Komi… now, we just need Marika and Raku's father's names and we'll be square, see?

Seriously though. I've taken to calling Raku's dad 'Raizo' and Marika's father 'Gendo' after that Evangelion parody scene. 'Raizo' was taken from 'Raizo Imawano', of Capcom's 'Rival Schools: United by Fate'.

Now, this is important… This fic already crosses over Naruto and Nisekoi, with slight Yamada-kun.

And it has recently been brought to my attention that canonically, Nisekoi, Ao Haru Ride, Ore Monogatari, and Haikyuu all take place in the same universe. Not to mention, Yamada-kun and Flunk Punk Rumble share one as well.

...So, this leaves me with 7 different series' to work with. Just a heads-up.

I don't have much else to say (except that the Team Ultimates in Storm Revolution are freaking awesome). So here's Chapter 9!

IMPORTANT: This chapter skips ahead a lot! Last chapter was in early June, and now we're it's Autumn! After the Festival! Things happened! Important things! After reading on later, about the events leading up to this chapter, things will start to make more sense!

The Tail of the Hero

…

'...How long has it been…? Since I first came here?'

I gazed up at the ceiling with a blank stare, not a trace of emotion on my face. Nothing. Not happiness, not boredom, nor even the slightest bit of melancholy. If you were to look into my eyes at that moment, you'd find that there was no soul behind them.

I blinked slowly, feeling the small, dried bits of sleep in my eyes. The open window let in a gentle autumn breeze that swayed the curtains to and fro. I could feel the light wind nipping at my exposed skin, the covers having been displaced in my sleep.

It was cold. I could almost feel goosebumps starting to form, and my crusty eyes were starting to annoy me. And yet, I couldn't find it in myself to move.

A slight glance of my irritated eyes toward my calendar told me everything I needed to know.

Today...was October 10th.

October 10th, 2014

Naruto and Tsugumi's Apartment

9:24 A.M.

(Tsugumi)

…

(*SHZZL*)

(*FSHH*)

Sauteing ingredients in a skillet, I whistled a light tune to myself as the savory smell of cooked chicken wafted throughout the room. The smoke, guided by the air currents, soared out the open window into the morning air, the light popping of the oil and sizzling of the meat resounding through the kitchen like music to my ears.

Upon thinking that, I sighed lightly, and smiled to myself. Whiskers'd always poke fun at my love for cooking whenever it came up.

While the onions slowly curled and turned clearer, I made sure to add the rice to the pan, stirring it in with the meats.

"It's not like I can help it…" I muttered, though unintelligible over the noise, "I feel just as comfortable in a kitchen as I do on the battlefield. Why is that so weird?"

I peeked at the pot on the side, where water simmered within.

'And besides, who wakes up with ramen anyway?' I murmured, 'That's way weirder if you ask me.'

I glanced at his closed door.

'...I guess he's always been a little strange though. Chalk it up to being raised on a different continent, I guess.'

I looked up at the ceiling, watching the steam rise, touch the stove hood, and dissipate.

'...Come to think of it, we had a pretty rocky start, didn't we? I didn't care for him much, and he seemed to work just for the sake of working...'

I looked back to the pan, finding it ready for the next step. Making a small gap in the browned rice, I added a bit of ketchup, letting it cook down a bit before mixing it in.

'I remember I didn't work well with him at first… He'd rush headlong into things, sometimes completely ignoring the mission objective for something considered trivial, or insignificant.'

I laughed a bit.

'But by the end of it, that 'trivial' thing from earlier would turn out to be him taking a problem and nipping it in the bud, something I would've completely overlooked. And the mission would go off without a hitch, so it wasn't like I could really complain...'

I shrugged and shook my head, as I moved the rice into a bowl, before splitting an egg and pouring its contents into the skillet.

'Ah well. That's all behind us now. The idiot's rubbed off on me, and now we're good friends.'

He was like that. Hanging around him all the time could really change you. No matter how thick your shell, you'd eventually crack, and begin to like him too. He was like some kind of drug; it was easy to get hooked on him, and he was incredibly addictive.

And yes, that includes relapses and withdrawal too.

That week I spent in Korea back in April... it was one of the worst of my life. It was so boring and stale without him there. He had this kind of aura that could just light up a room, and after living with that for the better part of six months, being torn away from it so suddenly like that…

Needless to say, the second I saw him again, I gave one of the tightest hugs I'd ever given.

Followed by stewed silence, of course, upon discovering that he'd won the bet.

I sighed in slight relief to myself.

'Thank god that's done and over with...' I thought, gratefully, 'I don't think I'll ever be able to live that down though...'

I flushed brightly, as memories of that time resurfaced, leaving me a sputtering mess.

'I better make sure the Mistress doesn't find out about that… or Miyamoto-sama as well, for that matter...'

Those two in particular had been pushing for us to date for a long time. Apparently, it was hard to believe we were only flatmates. Everyone seems to think we spend almost all of our free time 'fooling around' as it were, and those that didn't were the ones trying to push us together so that kind of thing would happen.

I really didn't understand why, however. Was it just human nature for people to want to play god in other's lives? Girls especially? Or was it really as they said? And that they just 'wanted us to be happy'? Because frankly, if they truly did wish the best for us, they wouldn't interfere so much.

'...They keep trying to push us together like that...' I grumbled, 'And they're so darned persistent about it! Why is it so hard to accept the fact that we're just flatmates?'

Said flatmate in question wasn't awake yet. Which of course, was strange in and of itself, considering he was always up by at least 5 A.M. on a weekday, doing upside-down sit-ups or one-fingered push-ups on the roof or something.

And yet today… he was still in bed for some reason.

'I wonder what's wrong… He's never done something like this before...' I tapped my chin in thought, 'Even when he 'sleeps in', he's always up by 8:00 at the latest. And it's almost 10 now!

I took the finished egg and placed it on top of the rice, tucking the edges underneath. Turning off the heat, I poured the boiling water from earlier into an instant ramen cup, for my blond companion.

Placing the two on the table (a fork for me, pair of chopsticks for him), I walked over and knocked on his door.

(*KNK KNK*)

"Whiskers!" I called through the wood, "Breakfast is ready!"

9:29 A.M.

(Naruto)

…

…!

A slight twitch of my eye was my only response at the presence before my door.

…

...

I rolled over, blanket swathed around me.

'Sorry Tsugu… Now's not a great time...'

9:30 A.M.

(Tsugumi)

'...That's funny...' I thought, 'He usually climbs through the window the second he smells the ramen packet...'

Glancing at the table and the steaming breakfast upon it, I made up my mind and climbed out the window. I sidled across the building wall with torpid, but practiced movement, heels digging into the dirty ledge, as cars and people bustled through the busy streets below.

I say 'practiced movement', because frankly, this was nothing new. Whiskers'd always fall asleep with his seals up, but leave his window open, enabling my swinging through it and waking him should his alarm fail to do so. Which, naturally, only occurred on his day-off from training, or just work in general; that is, Tuesday.

However, today definitely wasn't a Tuesday.

Reaching the opposite window, I reached for the frame with my outstretched left arm and using my momentum, swung inside.

Landing on my soot-stained feet (and dusting them off upon realizing how bad it was), I walked over to where my partner lay, facing away from me, rolled up in a cocoon of blankets.

Hm. That was certainly new.

"You know, you kind of look like a roll of sushi, laying there," I chuckled lightly, "Or maybe 'burrito' suits you better.

...No response.

That got my attention. Usually whenever I led with a jab like that, he'd respond with one of his own. Then I'd go for another one, and so would he, and we'd trade comments 'till he rolled out of bed.

This time though? Nothing.

I tried again, "Breakfast is ready, you know. Morning Miso, as you always say!"

...Still nothing.

I frowned, "Hey, are you okay? You didn't happen to have had a heart attack and died in your sleep, right? Honestly, I told you those ramen cups would kill you."

...Not a thing.

I walked over to where the face-hole was, hoping to maybe rub his whiskers or something to elicit a response. But then…

...my eyes met his.

They were dead. Not cold, or icy, like in those rare times I'd seen him angry, and not those rare moments of melancholy where he was bored out of his mind…

Those eyes were dead.

You could usually read him like a book with eyes like his. You know how they say that 'eyes are a window into the soul' and all that? Well, for him, it was especially true. You could practically see right into his mind, if you looked at them right. And you could find out all sorts of things. Like what kind of ramen he was craving, or what he was feeling bad about. But now…

"Naruto..."

He didn't say anything. He just lay there, motionless, the only movement being the slow blinking of his eyes and slight rise and fall of his chest.

If I didn't see those, I'd have trouble believing that the man in front of me was still alive.

I stood there for a good 5 minutes, just staring at him, and him staring back.

"...Your breakfast is on the table…" I said softly, breaking the silence, eyes not leaving his, "...Just come out whenever you're hungry…"

And I turned and left, the same way I came in.

...He didn't.

It was well past noon now, and he still hadn't come out. I'd cooked myself lunch, eaten said lunch, did the dishes, cleaned the place (again), washed my feet, scrubbed the sidling-ledge outside, took some dirty clothes down to the laundry room, came back up 20 minutes later, turned on the TV, flipped through every channel, opened up a few old mission files, answered a call from the Mistress about my whereabouts, sharpened a few of my butterfly knives, and even replicated the likeness of Jessica-senpai using said knives and a block of scrap wood we had lying around. And guess what?

He still hadn't come out.

I sighed to myself. This was getting ridiculous. What could've possibly upset him so much that he'd straight-up refuse to talk to me? That's never happened before. Even during training, and Claude made him madder than I'd ever seen him, he was still in a mood to rant about it.

I set down the Jessica-carving, and tilted my head back on the sofa. It got me thinking though: What could have possibly happened to put him in a mood like this?

Let's see…there was that incident with Colony early this summer (which was all done and over with now, thank the gods), the festival, the beach trip ,the disaster that was the Romeo & Juliet play… Nothing really stood out to me.

So what could it be?

It was almost 2 o'clock now... so I decided to check up on him. Sidling across the newly-cleaned ledge, I glanced at the sidewalk beneath me, idly noting how literally nobody seemed concerned at the person standing 30 feet above them with almost no support at all. Either people were a tad more ignorant of their surroundings than I originally thought, or they simply didn't care.

Nevertheless, I grasped the window's frame once again, swinging my way in with one fluid motion.

The bundle atop the mattress didn't twitch in the slightest at my arrival. In fact, it looked as if it hadn't moved from when I left it.

Walking over to the front to confirm he was alive and conscious, I spoke up.

"...Hey, Whiskers…" I started lamely, "...What's wrong? Seriously."

He remained silent, but this time, averted his gaze from mine.

Taking what was probably the first response today, I continued.

"...Is it something that happened yesterday? Is it something I did? C'mon...you can tell me."

He still said nothing, shifting a bit, pulling the blankets in further (if that was even possible).

"...You trust me, right?"

At that he looked up, blinking those soulless eyes a few times, before giving the slightest of nods.

I grinned, knowing I'd gotten him.

Quickly, I grabbed the base of the covers and yanked, my absurd strength leaving him in just his pajamas. Tossing them aside, I leapt up onto the mattress with him, squirming my way around to his back. I managed to worm the inside of my elbows underneath his armpits and wrapped my legs around his waist. A total full-Nelson.

I leaned in, whispering right into his ear.

"Ready to talk yet?"

His face didn't change in the slightest.

"Tsugu..."

Unsatisfied with my results, I decided to press on.

Using a bit of what I learned from Jessica, I gently rubbed his left cheek. I shifted, placing my neck right between his collarbone and shoulder, leaving my face right beneath his.

"What about now?"

"Tsugu, can you just-"

Hm. Still not giving in, huh?

I smiled on the inside. Jessica'd given me one more maneuver… My ace in the hole.

In a moment the Mistress'd probably never let me live down… I began to caress his cheek with my own, the distance between our mouths downright miniscule. If he so much as turned his head, we'd be…

...Well, you know.

Back when we were in the States, Jessica'd told me everything I needed to know about dealing with Naruto (after knowing him for less than a week at best), and that this particular 'trump card' was only a single-use… (unless I was lucky, of course), but in exchange…

She said I'd be able to get him to do anything I wanted.

Of course, under normal circumstances, I was against such forms of manipulation. Especially with someone as important to me as my partner. However, at this point, I was getting a bit frustrated.

Frustrated that something was wrong, and that there was nothing I could do to help him.

"Ready to tell me now?"

"Tsugumi."

My smile faded at the flat tone of voice. He turned his head to face me, eyes as empty as ever.

He gently untangled himself from me, leaving us both kneeling on the mattress. He lay his hands on my shoulders and spoke, in that dead tone of his.

"...Listen...I know it doesn't really make sense...and it's kinda' unfair too, but…"

"Can you please leave me alone? Just for today?"

"H-Huh?"

2:12 P.M.

(Tsugumi)

And so, here I was. Left to sit alone on the couch after having been kicked out of Naruto's room. Great.

I sighed to myself again, falling back into the cushions and letting my head hang off the back of the couch.

'...Seriously...what is going on?' I grumbled, 'What on Earth could have possibly hit him so hard…?'

(*VRRM VRRM*)

My body shot back into position at the sudden noise of my phone, vibrating across the end table. I picked it up and 'unlocked' it, displaying a text from the Mistress.

'Hey! U free right now?'

My fingers flew across the screen, 'Why? Did you need anything?'

It buzzed again.

'I'm really bored here!' it said, 'I was wondering if you wanted to go out to that cake buffet again?'

I sweatdropped, texting back:

'Mistress...we just went there the day before yesterday. You cleaned out the place too!'

'Yeah...but that was 2 days ago! And their strawberry-shortcake was to die for.'

Another consecutive message appeared.

'And that one cake we had! The third-to-last! Kosaki-chan would love that one!'

'Oh, did you plan on inviting her?'

…

There was a lengthy pause before she texted back.

'Of course I did! Oh, and bring Naruto too! They have that sweet potato cake with chestnuts! He loves that stuff!'

True, of course. During the annual BeeHive Camping Trip earlier this summer, when Klein lost all the food and rations the last day, Naruto'd gathered a bunch of wild sweet potatoes and chestnuts from the forest and we roasted them over a fire, like normal campers do. Onodera-sama had liked it especially; I believe candied sweet potatoes were her favorite food.

Returning from my little trip down memory lane, I texted back.

'I apologize Mistress...but I'm not certain that Naruto will be able to attend.'

(*BZZT BZZT*)

'Why? He's not sick, is he?'

'I don't think that's possible, for one. No, but he's acting all gloomy and melancholic. Something must've gotten him down, and I can't think of any particular reason why.'

'Naruto? Melancholic? Don't be silly.'

'I'm being serious. I've never seen him like this before… And when I tried to cheer him up, he just blew me off...'

'Wow...Wait, he 'blew you off'?'

'Well...yes...'

'Want me to head down there and beat some sense into him?'

'What? No!'

'Aww… I can't see your face right now, but you're so cute when you're flustered!'

'Mistress, please!'

'Ahaha...Well, come over then! We can ask around the base if anybody saw what might have happened before he left last night! Plus, it gives him more time to brood.'

Hm. She was right: we did report back for a mission yesterday.

'First of all, Naruto doesn't brood. At best, he mopes.'

I could almost hear the Mistress' giggling.

'Second of all, I'm not exactly certain as to how much help it'll be to ask around. Really anybody that would've seen him probably would've been a Lower-Ranked Admin at best, Grunt at worst. And you know as well as I do that the dropoff of overall skill and basic memory retention past Executive is quite steep...'

'True...but it won't hurt to try, right?'

'Hm...I suppose so. I'll be there shortly.'

'Perfect! I'll be in my room, alright?'

'Got it. I'll see you then!'

(Naruto)

"Come on brat… You're not still mad, are you?"

I glared up at the enormous Kitsune, "Of course I fucking am. Why the hell wouldn't I be?"

My mindscape was pretty much the same as always. That is, despite the absence of the dreary sewer that it was for a good 15 years of my life… it was pretty boring.

Most of the time anyway.

Right now, I was standing atop the craggy peak of Mount Myoboku; or rather, a facsimile imitation my mind had conjured up.

The great beast sighed, "Look kid, I'm sorry. Sorry for getting put under that bastard Uchiha's control, sorry for destroying your village, killing your parents, and causing you a lifetime of hatred and pain. But I thought you were past all of that already! You said so yourself!"

"I am. I am past all of that," I snapped sharply, "There's one… fucking reason I'm mad right now."

"Oh? And what would that be?"

"YOU, YOU BASTARD! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE!"

Yami smirked, making a waving motion with his hand.

"Oh, you know, just passing through," he grinned, "Your mind gets incredibly boring after a while…"

"The brat's right, you know…" grumbled the demon, "He beat the shit out of you. What are you doing back?"

Yami scowled, "He didn't 'beat the shit out of me', we're the same person, remember? He didn't lay a finger on me that whole fight!"

"Ah, right… I remember now!" Kurama gave a mocking grin, "He hugged you, and you lost!"

"It was more than that and you know it, you fox bastard!" Yami growled, "And what the hell, man! You're on his side now?! The fuck is up with that bullshit?!"

The Bijuu's eye twitched.

"I am not on his side, you utter buffoon. He merely...amuses me."

"Glad to know I'm so well-liked around here," I deadpanned.

"Secondly," he continued, ignoring me,"I only favor your light side because he's the one who has control. It's no fault of mine that you've lost to him. Both times."

"Alright, that first time was complete bullshit!" Yami argued, "He won that battle with 'friendship' and 'teamwork' and all kinds of other ludicrous ideals. When it comes to skill in battle, it's clear that I am the one on top!"

"Care to test that theory?" I growled, rolling up my sleeve.

My reflection grinned, "It's not theory when it's proven fact."

"Control yourself, brat," Kurama snarled, "He's baiting you. If you fight him again, he'll just end up with more influence than ever. Remember what happened last time?"

I paused, knowing exactly what he meant.

At the time, I was too livid; mentally unstable to realize it... but with every fight we had, my thoughts, my actions grew darker. The constant warring in my mind led to many regrettable decisions: so many things I wish I'd never done.

This being was like a fungus: one that leeched off my darkness to further his own survival. From the moment he appeared to whenever he faded, I had to do my best to keep my emotions in check.

Last time he appeared was shortly after… that incident. It was then that I threw myself into my ANBU career. Then when that stopped working, I started gambling to give myself some sense of accomplishment. After that, I turned to alcohol to drink my sorrows away. After that: narcotics… And there'd probably more if she didn't snap me out of it.

"Come to think of it…" I started, "You didn't answer my question. Why are you here?"

He grinned, "I believe you hold the answer to that question. Why am I here?"

I grunted, "Cut the riddle crap and answer me, damn you."

"He's kind of right, kid," the Kitsune observed, "He's only ever appeared when you were at your lowest: at the worst points of your life."

I frowned, "Well that doesn't make sense. It did last time because of that whole clusterfuck with the ring way-back-when, but why are you here now?"

As I spoke, Yami wandered aimlessly, before taking a seat atop one of the stone toad statues.

"It should be rather obvious. Today is October 10th, your darkest day of the year. So many birthdays gone by, filled with nothing but chases and beatings, pain and fear."

I narrowed my eyes, "That doesn't make sense. Tons of birthdays have come and past, and you never showed up. Hell, I was here just last year, and you didn't."

His grin grew wider, "And what's changed from then to now?"

I blinked.

"Literally nothing. And if you're referring to Tsugumi, we were working together last year too, so what are you-"

(*F-KNK*)

"GAGH!"

The doppelganger leapt off the statue, walked up, and flicked me on the forehead. He shrugged his shoulders and shook his head.

"Ah, me. You haven't changed a bit, have you?" he smirked again, "You're just as dense as always."

I glared rubbing where he'd hit me, "Dense? What are you talking about?"

"If you haven't figured it out yet, I won't tell you," he said simply, "I'm not going to hold your hand through the simplest of problems, you know."

"But I am you," he admitted, "And I'd never do something to harm us. I hope you know that."

I glared, "If I recall, our definitions of the words 'harm' and 'help' are very different."

His grin turned feral, "True. However, like I said, I'm not exactly on your side either, like that fuzzball over there.

He extended a hand, "So watch your back, Hikari."

I hesitated, then bumped his outstretched fist.

"Not for a second, Yami."

"Hey, like I said, I'm not on the brat's side either,"the fox grumbled, "And don't you forget that."

"Aww…" we hummed in unison, "We know you love us!"

"Shut up before I squash you."

My consciousness returned, as I blinked furiously, trying to get the spots out of my eyes. It was 2:30.

'Great… It's still not the 11th yet...'

"Hmph. See? Told ya' he was still hung up on it."

'Gk! What the hell!? Now you're there too!?'

"Of course. Kurama let me borrow the channel while he's out hunting those giant rabbit-monsters you created for him."

"An' now yu get tu lissen tu uz boff!" Kurama added, bloodied carcass likely between his teeth, "I'nt it gweat?"

'Yeah, great… It's like a mother-fucking jamboree.'

"Huh. I figured you'd be glad. There's finally something clunking around in your brain, after all."

'Remind me again how I hugged you, and you died?'

"...Well played."

(*NOKK NOKK*)

"Naruto!" I heard, "I'm heading over to HQ with the Mistress!"

Roughly 2 minutes earlier…

(Tsugumi)

'I'm leaving now, Ojou! I'll be there soon!'

'Great! I'll grab some snacks from the kitchen then!'

I straightened the cuffs of my sleeves, pocketing my phone upon doing so.

It had certainly been a while. Since I'd worn this blazer, I mean. I hadn't really touched it since before summer break…

No, that was wrong. I definitely wore it back in America, maybe on a mission once or twice. I remember distinctly, because Paula got mad at me for wearing 'male attire'.

Right… What I was wearing now was nothing more than a replica. The original blazer had been destroyed in that brief gang war we'd had with Colony, when they attacked us here in Bonyari and…

I caught myself from reminiscing a bit too much. I had somewhere to be right now.

(*NOKK NOKK*)

"Naruto!" I called, "I'm heading over to HQ with the Mistress!"

…

No reply, again.

I bit my lip, shaking my head. I guess, even when it comes to things like this, he's stubborn.

Making sure to lock the door behind me, I ascended the stairs. Rooftop-hopping was the way to travel, especially in places like Bonyari.

BeeHive HQ

Chitoge's Quarters

2:45 P.M.

(Chitoge)

"So he really rejected you? Just like that?"

"Well...yes. I don't blame him though. It was my fault for trying something like that in the first place. I shouldn't have stooped to that."

I nodded silently, chewing on the pocky stick in my mouth. I guess that made sense.

"I must say, Ojou… I'm rather surprised you managed to get your room back into order this quickly. The incident with Colony was only two months ago, after all."

"Ehehe… Well, Papa had some people come in to fix it. You can still kinda' see the spot where the wall was torn off though."

It was true. You could kind of see where the old paint met the new, and it ran in that same jagged outline.

She frowned, sipping her tea, "Why not just paint over it?"

I shrugged, "I was thinking of leaving it as is. You know, as a reminder."

"...Ojou…"

I smiled, "I realize that you won't always be there to protect me… So I've got to get strong too! To protect myself!"

She sweatdropped, "You certainly seem fired up about it. By the way, how's Naruto's Taijutsu training going for you?"

"It's going well! He said I reminded him of his grand-aunt, and he's teaching me her style!"

The sweatdrop increased, "You mean Tsunade? And her legendary 'Strength of a Hundred' Style?"

"Yeah, that's the one! It's awesome; I can send those baddies flying now!"

I grinned, "Not that I couldn't before…"

"Speaking of, what's going on?" I started, getting back on topic, "You said he's all depressed and stuff, right? And you don't know the reason why?"

"That's right," she said, "He won't talk to me, and when I tried to cheer him up, he turned me down… I thought we went through this."

"We did, we did. I'm just… reviewing the facts, is all."

She nodded, screwing the cap back on her bottle from her place by the wall.

"So what's the plan?" I asked, "We're asking around, right? Where do we start?"

"I was thinking we do it the Johnson way and we check the Common Area. And maybe Johnson himself too, if we can find him. His network is everywhere."

"Hm, that's a good plan," she said, getting up and stretching, "Wait, let's check with Claude too! You stopped by last night to report for a mission, didn't you?"

"Oh, right! Thanks for reminding me!" I agreed, "Now let's hurry. The quicker we get this done, the quicker he gets better!"

"Right!"

(Tsugumi)

And so, as per our plan, we 'asked around'.

And turned up with exactly nothing.

Klein had merely shrugged, saying he hadn't seen Naruto since last week, on that mission to Akihabara. The others in 'The Demolition Crew' yielded similar answers, as well as any other grunts hanging around the lobby.

After the common, we headed to Claude's office, again, as planned. Along the way, we stopped by Braun's and Smith's offices too, though they weren't much help either.

Braun had spent the night in his lab, like usual, and was up late working the night before. However, he was quite absorbed in his work at the time, and hadn't seen us when Naruto and I had passed. Smith had already returned to his chambers by the time we'd left yesterday, so he hadn't seen anything…

"Hm? Last night, you say?"

And so, Claude's office it was.

"Yes, Claude-sama," I nodded, "Upon our departure, did you perhaps… notice anything peculiar regarding Uzumaki, sir?"

"Nnn…"

He looked downward and contemplated for a bit.

"...Not at all, Seishirou. Why do you ask?"

"Well, today he seems to be... feeling under the weather, I suppose…" I fidgeted slightly, "I was wondering if you had any information that might shed light on his behavior."

He raised a brow, "'Under the weather'? Is he ill?"

"Not physically, I don't think," the Mistress said, "Tsugumi said he looked fine physically. But something was definitely bothering him."

"Hm...Was it something I said?" Claude pondered, "...I've been told by Uzumaki himself that I'm 'terribly blunt' and 'need to learn to sugarcoat things'... Perhaps it was my doing?"

I shook my head, "No, it couldn't have been something you said. I was there too, I would've heard it. But did you notice anything odd about him, behavior-wise?"

"None whatsoever... that I could tell at least. I've also been told that 'I'm terrible at reading people'..." he said, wiping his glasses, "...by both Johnson and Uzumaki alike."

"By the way Seishirou, I might have you and White Fang on assignment within the year. Seccacino of the Colony Gang is hosting a ball on his cruise ship, and I plan to send you two in as a couple. Polish up on your skills as a gentleman, will you?"

The Mistress and I both sweatdropped at that, one significantly bigger than the other.

"Y-Yeah. I'll make sure to do that…" I set that one aside for later, "Anyway, back on topic?"

"Right, right. As I was saying, you clearly know Uzumaki better than I do," he admitted, "If there were any misstep or lapse in his behavior, you'd certainly be the first one to know about it."

The Mistress nodded beside me. I guess that made sense.

"In fact, I don't know many of my operatives personally… The most I've interacted with Uzumaki-kun have been on missions. My knowledge of him is strictly professional," he pushed up his glasses, "As such, the most help I can be of to you would be to give you his file."

We glanced at each other, before she shrugged, as if to say that anything could help.

I looked back to my boss and nodded, "That'd be quite useful. Thank you."

Upon my response, he withdrew the file from his desk. Said file was contained within a manila envelope, and was a tad heavier than I expected.

"Alright, you're going to have to read that somewhere else," he said, pulling out his keys, "I'm heading over to XX Corporation for a big meeting with the other Executives."

"Oh, that's right!" I remembered, as we walked, "That's why all the grunts and everybody has the day off, right?"

"Yes, in part…" he muttered, turning the key to lock up, "A few of them have decided to stick around though, as you've probably seen."

He pocketed them, pushing up his glasses again.

"Well, I'm off. I wish you the best in your search."

And he walked off in the direction of the common.

…

"You still speak super-formal with that guy," she observed, once he was out of earshot, "I take it you still haven't told him?"

"Of course not. I'd have told you I was telling him before I'd have told him, I'm telling you."

She quirked an eyebrow, "Really? I couldn't tell."

…

We both burst out laughing. This was definitely some Naruto-type humor…

Right! Naruto!

I popped open the top of the file, revealing paper after paper after paper...after paper… God, this was at least 300 pages!

Upon seeing this, the Mistress expression flattened, her jaw dropping.

"...We're gonna' need more people for this, huh?" I asked.

She pursed her lips, pulling out her phone.

"Time to call in the cavalry."

Shuuei-gumi Base

3:41 P.M.

(Raku)

"...83...84...85…"

"Eeh...Bocchan? What'cha' doin' there?"

"What?"

I stopped my workout to stare down (or was it forward?) at Ryuu, who'd just interrupted my set of vertical sit-ups.

"Just a quick work-out, nothing much," I grinned, letting my arms dangle, "Why? What's up?"

"There's a call for you on the landline…" he said, looking kind of impressed, "It's from your girlfriend."

"From Chitoge?" I asked, extending a hand, "Give it here."

The man shrugged, tossing me the mobile.

"Hey honey."

"Hey there, 'darling'. Are you free right now?"

"Ehh…" I looked down at the ground a meter below, the action bringing back the sensation of blood rushing to my head.

"...Depends. What's going on?"

"Apparently, Naruto's been acting really weird today. Tsugumi says he was all lifeless and melancholic."

"Senpai? Melancholic? Lifeless?"

"I didn't believe it either, but it's true. Anyway, we may have gotten a lead as to why he's acting like this, but it's a lot of stuff to comb through. It's a whole bunch of files, startin' from when he got here, to whenever his last mission was. We're calling over Kosaki-chan and Ruri-chan too, and Tsugumi's already here."

I was sold at 'Kosaki-chan'.

"I'll be right over. Give me twenty minutes."

"Got it. Over and out!"

"Hey, can I bring Shuu?"

…

"...Maiko? ...Sure. Just...try to keep him in line, would you?"

"Well, Miyamoto usually does that for us."

"True. Yeah, bring him. I'll see you in twenty."

"Yeah. 'Til then."

(*BLLP*)

…

I quickly dialed Shuu's number, having known it by heart.

"Heyy! Raku! What can I do for ya'?"

"Well, apparently, Naruto's been acting weird, and Chitoge has a lead as to why. We're meeting over at her house in half an hour. Wanna' come?"

"Sure! Who else is coming?"

"Hm… Me, you, Chitoge, Tsugumi, Onodera, Miyamoto… that should be it."

"Alright, great! I'll start getting ready!"

There was a slight pause, as I dismounted with a small (*THUD*).

"What exactly is this lead, by the way? Do you know?"

"Apparently, a bunch of documents. So, a lot of reading," I wiped down with a hand towel, "The papers are spaced out over the entirety of his time here in Bonyari, including missions and stuff."

"So we have to piece 'em together, huh? Sounds fun. Lots of things to connect. Lots of holes to fill. Bow chicka wow wow."

"...Dude."

"What?"

Naruto and Tsugumi's Apartment

4:19 P.M.

(Naruto)

"...Dammit…"

I'd gone to sleep yet again and woken up, again… and it still wasn't the 11th yet.

I sighed, rolling over to face the open window, the cool breeze flowing through the room. I could see the setting sun outside, the sky tinted a beautiful orange…

"Ya' know that's 'cause of pollution, right?"

I blinked.

'Of course I do. I'm you, remember?' I grumbled, repeating the fact for the thousandth time, 'And I'm a Sage, you know. I can feel it in the air.'

"It's a shame what humans here have done to the environment," Kurama yawned, "Makes me actually kind of miss the Elemental Countries."

'Aw, so you're saying you miss Tsunade-baa-chan and the others?'

"Please. Just another breed of hairless monkey to me," he growled.

"Glad to know you think so highly of us…" we muttered.

The beast growled at our syncretism.

"...I will admit though… That woman wasn't too hard to look at… And I understand she was considered attractive by hairless-monkey standards…"

"Yeah, but she was like, fifty," Yami countered, "Frankly, I'm more interested in your... current company."

I sighed again, 'Here we go...'

"No, seriously. Did you feel her when she pressed up against our back? Thought I was gonna' die."

'Duude...'

I could practically feel Kurama's grin, "Yeah, then when she stuck her face right next to yours? Couldn't you just feel her breath on your neck?"

'Can we not…?'

"Yeah, and then her cheek on ours…"

"I know, right? She was totally ready for some Hanky Panky."

'Will you just-'

"Some Dirty Work at the Crossroads..."

"Some Gland-to-Gland combat?"

"Or maybe some Ugandan Discussions…?

'Guys...'

"The Horizontal Tango!"

"Gettin' Fresh!"

"Fuckarena!"

"Ooh, nice. I kinda' like that on-"

'Mute.'

The voices stopped.

'Thank the Sage for small mercies...'

BeeHive HQ

4:40 P.M.

(Chitoge)

"Should we be doing this?" Kosaki asked, "I feel like we shouldn't be doing this."

"Of course we should," Ruri said resolutely, "This is for his own sake, after all."

"I agree with Onodera…" Raku said, "If that's true, we shouldn't. Naruto's done a lot to try and cover up his past, and looking through his whole life story like this… It's kinda disrespectful, you know?"

"It's not 'his whole life story', you beansprout…" I confirmed, "It only covers his time here, with a bit of background...right Tsugumi?"

"Right," she nodded, "That's how these files are formatted."

"Well this seems terribly boring…" Tachibana murmured, "But if Raku-sama is willing to dedicate his time, then so am I!"

"No one asked your opinion…" I grumbled, "And who invited you anyway?"

She giggled and wrapped herself around the Beansprout's arm.

"Wherever Rakkun goes, so do I!"

"EVERYONE!"

We all turned to Maiko, who'd just blown our eardrums out.

"...We're here...because one of our friends is in pain right now…" he said seriously, "So can we please stop messing around and move on?"

Slowly, we all nodded.

"Alright then…"

He stood, everyone else looking up to him.

"...Let's get our first-ever 'Help-Our-Leader-Get-Better' NinjaSexParty meeting underway," he said, "...And may it be the last."

I sighed, "Really? That stupid name again?"

He shrugged, "What? Did you have a better group name?"

"Literally anything else, for one."

"Aw, c'mon! What's wrong with 'NinjaSe'- AGHH!"

In the middle of his plea, Ruri-chan reached up and whacked him across the head.

"Quit fooling around, will you? We have work to do!"

"She's right," I affirmed, "Here's what we have."

Taking care with the documents...

(*F-KASHH*)

I dumped them all out across the table.

Tsugumi sweatdropped.

"...Ojou…maybe be a bit more careful with those?"

"What? That was careful."

Ignoring us, Raku got back on track.

"Alright, so there are…" he looked to Tsugumi, "...Three-hundred?"

"Three-hundred."

"-Three-Hundred papers in all! We have 7 people here. So each of us get about 40 or so. Each report averages around…" he looked back to her, "...twenty?"

"Twenty."

"-Twenty pages! So, that's two reports per! And remember, recent ones are top priority! We're looking for something that might've left someone as stubborn and stalwart as Naruto uneasy. So good luck. Happy reading, I guess."

"Wow, nice one…" I said with a flat tone, "You should become a motivational speaker."

"Sh-Shut up! I'm not the leader here. He's a lot better at this than I am."

He shook his head.

"Speaking of which, can we...you know, get to work now? We've spent enough time rambling."

"Right. Let's do this!"

(Chitoge's File)

Mission Rank: 5

Classification: Search and Rescue

Client: N/A

Targets: N/A

Team: Orange Shadow, Black Tiger, White Fang, Grey Claw (Pilot)

Date Assigned: June 29, 2014

Date Completed: June 30, 2014

Objective: Klein and his team have been captured and detained in a Colony Base located on an island 300 miles off the coast of California. The primary objective is to infiltrate the base and get them out. A BeeHive aircraft will be waiting to pick up the deployed team, alongside the Demolition Crew at the Extraction Point (the roof of the facility).

Secondary Objective: Once the first objective is completed, wreak as much havoc as possible.

Report: The helicopter touched down on the opposite side of the island at 22:43 without attracting any unwanted attention. Shadow, Tiger, and Fang arrived at the base approximately 23:21 before entering the facility roughly 3 minutes later. The guards were swiftly and quietly dealt with, and the team extracted. It wasn't 'til they reached the halls when they were noticed. The deployed team broke off into two groups, consisting of Klein and his group alongside White Fang, and Orange Shadow with Black Tiger. The latter two took care of the grunts, and later Executive, while the former group planted charges around the base. Extraction went off without a hitch, and the facility went sky high shortly upon departure. Returned to base 00:56 the next day.

'Hm… So they did this mission over the summer, huh?'

I set it aside, 'Not too relevant then...'

I picked up the next one.

Mission Rank: 8

Classification: Sabotage

Client: N/A

Target: N/A

Team: Orange Shadow, Black Tiger, Grey Claw, Silver Cloud

Date Assigned: June 26, 2014

Date Completed: June 27, 2014

Objective: Colony is sponsoring a major ball (a growing trend with them, for some reason), which the deployed team will infiltrate. Cloud and Claw will pose as a couple, as will Shadow and Tiger (who will play the female role) to gain entry. Aliases are already 'on the list'. After Cappuccino's speech, Claw will HoneyTrap him, while the others partake in the 'slow dance' occurring simultaneously. Upon confirmation of Cappuccino's death, in Shadow's own words, 'Get the Hell Outta' Dodge.' The death of the Colony Executive is of the utmost importance for our following operations.

Report: Deployed team arrived on schedule, and infiltrated the party without issue. Speech occurred at 23:15, and ended at 23:17. Afterward, Claw lured the man to one of the back rooms, as the others followed through on their part of the mission, looking as casual and inconspicuous as possible. Confirmed death at 23:23. The 5MM bullet was fired from a .10 caliber gun disguised as a lighter, and lodged through the spinal cord in the back of the neck. All members of the group reached the extraction point at 23:31, and returned to base at 00:13.

'Oh… I remember Naruto told me about this mission. This was when he met Jessica for the first time… I think…'

'Hm… looks like I'm done here. What about everyone else?'

I set aside this one as well, looking around the room at who was still reading.

Raku had just finished his first packet, and was starting the first page of his second. Maiko had finished both, and was...oddly quiet. It appeared that Ruri-chan'd already finished hers, but was reading again, for some reason. Tachibana… appeared to be biting her lip as she read through hers.

Tsugumi, who'd already finished hers, looked over at me, as if to say:

'...Ojou...Maybe this wasn't such a good idea...'

I raised an eyebrow.

'Why? We're almost done! Oh, did you find anything?'

'Well, no… But that's not my point right now.'

'Hm? Your point?'

She nodded solemnly.

'Do you see how they're all taking this? What we do… it's not exactly sunshine and rainbows, remember?'

Oh…

OH…

I looked over at Maiko, whose earlier unidentified look was easily recognizable as discomfort, as he stewed over what he'd just read. Tachibana looked slightly offput, her usual smile having dropped. Kosaki was looking pale… much paler than usual, and even Raku, who'd known about what his Senpai did for a living… even he looked like he was troubled by it.

'I… guess we jumped the gun on that...' I admitted, 'But it had to be done sooner or later. It just happened...sooner, I suppose.'

'Ojou...'

"Wow…" Kosaki said softly, "...s-so...you both… you really did that?"

Tsugumi was silent.

She looked down,"...Yes, we did."

"And…" Maiko started, "...you also...?"

She averted her eyes, "Yes. Yes, we did."

"You even…" Raku mumbled, "You really...?"

She closed them, gritting her teeth, "...Yes. Yes we did."

…

And all at once, the room exploded.

"TSUGUMI-SAN! You and Naruto-kun rescued a princess!?" Kosaki exclaimed.

"So then, you and Naruto really jumped out of a burning plane into the ocean and walked off without a scratch!?"

"Seishirou-chan! I had no idea you were that flexible!"

Perverted comment lost in the confusion, Tsugumi looked up, bewildered.

"Wait...you're not… disturbed? At all?"

Raku grinned, "Not really. You're still our friend, and it doesn't matter what you do, or what you've done."

He jammed his thumb above his heart.

"Cuz' that'll never change!"

"Yeah!" the others cheered/nodded.

"Pardon me..."

We all turned to Tachibana.

"I do not wish to put a damper on such cheerful festivities…" she murmured, "...but did anyone perhaps, find anything that might pertain as to Naruto-san's behavior?"

Everyone went silent at that.

"I take it no one did."

She sighed.

"So what do we do now?" I muttered, "We looked through all the mission reports, right? What else is there to it?"

"Maybe we're reading too much into this…" Kosaki offered, "Maybe try something simpler?"

Raku looked over at her, "What did you have in mind, Onodera?"

"Well…I was thinking maybe…" she fidgeted with her hands a bit, "We're taking this in the wrong direction. So, instead of 'what made Naruto-kun like this', or when, why, or how it happened..."

"...We focus on what we can do to make it better," Shuu finished, "Am I right Onodera-san?"

"Yes! Exactly, Maiko-kun!"

I saw Raku droop in the corner of my eye.

"Alright then…" Tsugumi agreed, "...So let's switch targets, shall we?"

I nodded, "What can we do to cheer him up?"

"...Well, what does he like?" asked Tachibana, having known him the shortest, "Perhaps we can modify our plan accordingly."

"Well let's see…" I started, "Ramen, training, the idea of being Hokage, sharp things, ramen, being Hokage, orange, training, ramen…"

Ruri-chan sweatdropped, "I feel like you looped a couple times there."

"Well, what else do I say?" I sighed, "Look, one of my best friends in the entire world is in trouble, and there's nothing I can do about it. I can't think straight, alright?"

Raku pinched the bridge of his nose, "I know what you mean… He's spent so much time helping us; he's given up so much for us…"

"He's trained us… so we could take care of ourselves. And so that when it came down to it, we were strong. But…"

He ran a hand through his hair.

"After all this time… I still feel helpless…"

The group went silent after that.

…

"Sweet potatoes."

We looked up at Tsugumi, "What?"

"Sweet potatoes. Sweet potatoes and chestnuts. He loves those. Remember the camping trip?"

I lit up, "Right! Maybe we should try getting that cake for him?"

"Cake?" Kosaki-chan echoed, "What are you talking about?"

"Another cake buffet recently opened near Otori Girl's High…" I grinned, "You'd definitely love it, Kosaki-chan! But yeah, Tsugumi and I went a while ago and it was great! Anyway, they had this cake with Candied Sweet Potatoes and Chestnuts that Naruto would definitely like!"

"D-Did you say Candied Sweet Potatoes?"

I blinked.

"Um… yeah. I remember you liked those too...right?" I murmured, unsure, "...Kosaki-chan?"

I feel an unsettling aura coming from her… like that of a leopard about to pounce. Nothing to be afraid of, of course, it was just particularly unusual coming from her.

She looked up, eyes sparkling, mouth watering.

"We need to go there, right now!" she pleaded, practically begging for it.

I sweatdropped.

"Well… I was thinking we could maybe get him one for his birthday…" I remarked, "And his birthday's this month!"

"So don't worry Kosaki-chan!" I grinned, flashing the peace sign, "You won't have to wait long!"

Ruri looked over at my bodyguard, "His birthday is this month? What day is it?"

Tsugumi shrugged, "It's really not that far off. It's actually…"

She blinked.

…

(*WHAM*)

The room shook as the woman slammed her face into the desk, sending papers flying all over the place. They fluttered to the floor, revealing that the table had split perfectly in two at the force of the blow.

"Tsu-Tsugumi?" I asked hesitantly, "Are you alright?"

"Mmphfdkn…." whatever she had said was muffled, her face still lodged in the wood.

We all sweatdropped.

Ruri wiped hers, "You didn't answer my question, Tsugumi-san."

"Fts ftdy…"

"...What?"

She pulled her face from the imprint in the desk, wiping her face and running a hand through her hair, eyes closed as she sighed.

"His birthday…"

"...It's today."

Naruto and Tsugumi's Apartment

Mindscape

4:42 P.M.

(Naruto)

'Unmute.'

"The Beast with Two Backs…"

"The Dance with No Pants…"

"Rumple her Stiltskin…"

I sweatdropped, "You guys are still going at it?"

They both turned to glare at me, "As would you be, if you'd have kept your fucking mouth shut!"

I did a quick spit-take.

"You guys are the worst…" I grumbled, wiping my mouth, "I already get an earful from Chitoge or Ruri whenever it comes up… I thought you guys were supposed to be on my side?"

"We are," Yami said simply, leaning up against a rock, "And we'll always act within your best interest."

"That being said…" Kurama's tails waved around a bit, "Getting you laid is within your best interest."

I facefaulted.

"Ooh, that's another one! Getting laid!" Yami pointed out, "How the hell did we miss that one?"

Kurama shrugged, "I figured we were avoiding the obvious ones. Like, you know, 'having sex', or 'getting it on'?"

"Boning?"

"Sticking your weiner inside of her-"

'Mute.'

I left my mindscape with my face in my palms.

'I pray to the Sage that these guys don't meet Shuu.'

BeeHive HQ

4:45 P.M.

(Raku)

"Yes, your Candied Sweet Potato cake."

…

"Oh, really?" she silently pumped her fist, "That'll be perfect!"

…

"Alright! We'll stop by at…" she checked her watch, "...6 o'clock! Thank you!"

She flipped her phone shut.

"Good news?" I asked, setting down the staple gun.

"Yep! The cake should be ready in an hour and a half, so we have plenty of time!" she winked and flashed the peace sign.

It had been roughly twenty minutes since our discussion in the Chitoge's room. Upon their Mistress' request, all the stragglers who'd stuck around despite having the day off went out for the night, leaving us with the mansion to ourselves.

And the lounge for a party, of course.

Yep, that's what we decided on. A birthday party. Seemed logical enough. Tsugumi and Shuu had gone and called all our classmates, and even some friends we'd made from other schools. The party started at 6:30, up until everyone decided to leave, making it a fairly late one.

What before was the BeeHive common was now nearly unrecognizable. Decorations covered the walls, tables were set up, and Shuu had even called in a few of his contacts, bringing in some lights, a bunch of speakers, and a DJ board of all things. Seriously. That guy's network is crazy.

He wanted to bring in a smoke machine and a disco ball too… Luckily, I'd talked him out of the former. The latter?

I stared up at the glittering contraption on the ceiling.

Not so lucky.

Anyway, Tsugumi and Tachibana were in the kitchen, working on snacks and things, Shuu was getting a crash course in DJing from his friend, and Chitoge, Miyamoto, and I were setting up decorations. Onodera went from position to position, telling us where to put what, and occasionally going over to check on the other two, doing the same.

I looked wearily at the orange streamer in my hand. Then to the ramen cups and ramen-themed decorations strewn about. Uh huh. This was definitely a Naruto party.

Chitoge wanted to do something relating to his homeland and Konoha… But we'd all gave it some thought and opted not to, in case he was homesick again.

(*K-CHUCK*)

I reloaded the staple gun, ready to post more of the ornaments. I guess we really can't afford to dawdle here. The party's in a few hours after all!

"That's great, Chitoge-chan!" Onodera said, clapping her hands together sweetly, "We'll send someone to pick it up then!"

"...Uh…"

I could feel a bit of an underlying message in that statement… Like she wanted to go herself, or something.

That… was probably the case, huh?

"That's a great idea, Kosaki," Miyamoto said, appearing next to us in a flash.

"In fact, why don't you go with her, Ichijou-kun?"

"Ee?!"

Naruto and Tsugumi's Apartment

5:32 P.M.

(Naruto)

…

"What's got you down there, me?"

I didn't even bother looking up.

"You know damn well."

He flashed that mocking smile of his, "Oh, do I, now? Perhaps I do, perhaps I don't. And even if I did, remember…"

"If you really wanted me to disappear, you have to admit it. It doesn't matter whether or not I know what it is, you have to be the one to realize that."

I glared, "And why does it matter if I say it or not? If I know what it is, shouldn't that be the end of it?"

He shook his head, "No, it's not that simple. And have you considered that the reason for my appearance is actually different than whatever you've come up with? If that were the case, only by speaking it aloud can you know for sure."

I sighed, "This is bullshit."

"Shut up. I don't make the rules."

I frowned, "If you don't, then who the hell does?"

"Hey, if I made the rules, I wouldn't disappear when all of this was over…" he stood and walked toward the center of the pond, "But since we're on the topic…"

He turned to me with a smirk.

"Care to test that idea of yours? As to why I'm here, I mean."

I matched his glare with my own, "And who's to tell me that you're not just luring me into a trap? What if, by admitting it, you only become stronger as a result?"

"Well, me, for one."

We both took a step back in surprise, having long forgotten the presence of the giant orange fox at our side.

Funny how that works.

"I can vouch for him here, brat," he muttered, ear twitching about, "No tricks, traps, or the like. Admit it, and he's gone."

"...Alright, Kurama. I'll trust you on this one."

"You trust the demon before yourself?" he laughed aloud, "My, how low you've fallen."

"I trust my partners before the doppelganger, more like…" I muttered.

"Ignoring that… How about it?" he asked, "Ready to tell me what's troublin' ya'?"

I lowered my gaze, leaning forward atop the rock, my eyes shadowed by my hair.

…

...

"...It's today…" I said softly, "The day it all happened. When Obito truly turned traitor and sicced Kyuubi on the village… when Mom and Dad died to protect me… when they sacrificed themselves for the village… when they sacrificed me for the village…"

"All those lives lost, for one man's hatred. The hatred that passed from Kurama, to the villagers, and then on to me…"

I looked up at my double, that empty look in my eye.

"That's what you are, aren't you? The hate I received, but never returned? The hate I kept bottled up inside me to end this cycle of hatred? Am I right?"

He nodded, grinning again, "That's right. You're starting to get it. But the question is: 'Why is he here?'."

My gaze returned to the ground below.

"You'd only show up when that hate begins to build, and I feel the need to pass that on. You're the safeguard that prevents me from doing that."

His grin began to falter, "Yes. That's what I am. But 'What am I doing here?'."

A spark awoke in my eyes, "And that's why you're here today. I feel some kind of resentment toward the villagers, somewhere, deep down, and it's reemerged today. My birthday. Annual Kyuubi Festival/Fox Hunt. You're here to make sure that hate doesn't get passed. Am I right?"

(*F-KNK*)

"GAGH!"

He sighed, shrugging and shaking his head.

"No… you were right in what I am, and the'why I've returned'," he said, "...But you got one thing wrong."

I blinked.

"What you missed was 'Whom you are trying to pass this hatred on to'," he said, "You're right that I'm the 'safeguard' and that you're subconsciously trying to redirect this hate, but you don't have the 'who', and the 'why'."

"The 'who'...and the 'why'?" I muttered, "There's no way I could hate anyone! I promised myself I'd never succumb to those emotions again… that I was going to end this damn 'Cycle of Hatred' once and for all!"

"A valiant goal, indeed…" he admitted, "Unfortunately, such a thing doesn't exist within the realm of feasibility."

"And hating the villagers? You?Please." he laughed, "You're much more selfless than you give yourself credit for. So much so that it'll probably be the death of you."

He shook his head again, "But we're getting off topic. If you don't have those answers, well…"

He sat and leaned back against the pond's surface, "I guess I'm not leaving anytime soon."

I grit my teeth, as I left the mindscape.

I moved my arm out from under the pillow, rolling my shoulder to get the feeling back into it.

"Damn… what the hell is it?"

I brought the pillow up, burying my face in it.

''Who'... and 'Why'... huh?'

Bonyari

Streets

5:51 P.M.

(Raku)

'I can't believe it...' I gulped, 'I… Am I really…'

"We're making pretty good time, aren't we, Ichijou-kun?"

"Y-Yeah, we sure are, aren't we?"

'AM I REALLY ON A DATE WITH KOSAKI ONODERAAAAAA!?'

'Think man, think!' I smiled weakly, putting up the best front I could, 'What the hell do I do? I mean, it's something I've dreamed of for a long time… Didn't I have a plan for this? Wait, is this even a date in the first place? Does picking up a cake qualify as a date? Last time we picked up a gift for Chitoge and it did! And both times were induced by Miyamoto, huh?'

I shook my head rapidly, 'Nooo, what am I doing thinking of Miyamoto of all people right now!? I'm out on the town with the girl of my dreams!'

'Out on the town'? I guess that's probably not what the phrase means… My English is pretty bad. Either way, brain, you need to stop getting off track!'

'Sorry Raku.'

'It's okay brain. Just don't do it- FUCK, WE DID IT AGAIN!'

"Ano… Ichijou-kun? Are you alright?"

Onodera looked at me with concern.

"H-Huh!? Y-Yeah! I'm totally fine, Onodera!"

'Shiiiit… she totally thinks we're weird now.'

'Relax, man,' brain said, 'Onodera's not that shallow!'

'Ahh! You're right! I can't believe I doubted her!'

'Anyway, forget that! What do I do, what do I do!?'

Yep, it was the same as always. I was on a date with the girl of my dreams, and I couldn't for the life of me figure out what I was supposed to do.

But was this really a date? Wait, we've covered this already. Great, now I'm looping. How braindead am I right now? Probably quite a bit.

Let's see. What's the antonym of 'always'? Seven? Great. I'm officially stupid.

Hey, does the word 'braindead' have different degrees to it? Or is it just an absolute statement? Like, the word 'wrong' or 'right' might seem absolute, but there are certainly varying degrees to them…

Dammit, I can't stay focused, can I?

I glanced over at the girl, who avoided my gaze. My face drooped a bit, but we kept walking.

'Alright, this is getting awkward. I should say something,' I pondered a bit, 'Now, what to say...'

"We're almost there, Onodera…"

She smiled and nodded as we continued to walk.

'Alright, that one was good. Let's try more of that. Maybe-'

…

...What am I doing?

Seriously. One of the most selfless people I know is in trouble right now… and all I can think of is 'How do I impress my crush'?

I grit my teeth.

No… If there were ever a time to be so incredibly selfish, now wasn't the time.

"...C'mon, Onodera…" I said, "...Let's go get that cake."

"A-Ah! Hai!"

Naruto and Tsugumi's Apartment

6:04 P.M.

(Naruto)

"How about this?" Kurama asked, "He actually hates that Glasses Guy. The one who thinks his mate is a man?"

"No," Yami said flatly, "And hey, why are you guessing? You realize that even if you guess correctly it won't make a difference, right?"

"Kinda' figured that," the beast shrugged, "I'm just bored. Not like your light half has anything to say about it either."

Whatever they were saying, I couldn't hear them, their voices unintelligible buzzing in my head. I'd finally rolled out of bed, and sat shirtless on the windowsill/balcony, staring wordlessly at the setting sun.

I felt the warm breeze lap against my skin, Tsunade-baa-chan's necklace swaying with it. Seeing this, I took it off and held the gem to the light, gazing at my surroundings as they became coated in a turquoise glow from the refraction.

I took a quick glance at my headband laying on the nightstand, the metal plate kept pristine through use of basic Fuuinjutsu. The cloth was another story, constantly fraying and tearing. It wasn't the most durable of material, given that the original fabric had been destroyed last summer. The one used now was a mishmash of whatever Tsugumi could find and stitch together…

Dammit, that's right. Tsugumi. I was such an ass to her this morning… And I left her without an explanation, didn't I?

Shit… I feel like such a jerk. All she does is help me out, and I treated her terribly… I'm worse than trash.

I stared at the wall calendar, the accursed number. Ten. October Tenth, the Ten Members of Akatsuki, the Ten Tails… nothing good ever comes from that number.

Ah, wait. That's not right. Tsugumi's birthday is the 10th of March. And more importantly, the 'Uzumaki Naruto Special' at the Hakusho Ramen Shop is $10. Yeah… I could totally go for one of those right now.

Ehh… What am I thinking…? I should be thinking of some way to apologize right now…

I looked back to the wall calendar.

…

...

'Hey… Yami?' I called for him, 'I think I found my answer.'

A sort of translucent form appeared next to me, in the shape of said doppelganger. Luckily I knew this was all mental, otherwise I'd wonder where in the hell we'd learned genjutsu.

"Oh?" he grinned, sitting on my bed like the Cheshire Cat, "And what would that be?"

'I don't hate the villagers,' I affirmed, 'However… my birthday is still what brought this all on.'

He said nothing, gesturing for me to continue.

'It's just… this day is filled with so many bad memories for me...' I clutched the necklace to my heart, right below my Chidori scar, '...And naturally, it brings out the worst in me.'

'But to be honest… I don't hate the 10th of October after all. Up until now, I've only viewed it as the single worst day of my life. My parents died, my village was destroyed, and it's the day the hate began… and carried on.'

'But, I was wrong. I only looked at one side of things. The you side of things.'

He chuckled at this.

'Yeah, it sucks… But what it represents is so much more.'

'Over 15 years ago today… the two greatest parents a boy could ask for... gave everything a boy could ever ask for. They entrusted...in me...the ultimate trust. To bear the hate. To withstand it all. To survive. I was to be a beacon of light in a world of violence… hate… and darkness...'

I looked to him, 'So, no. I don't hate the villagers. I don't hate October the Tenth. I don't hate Kurama… And I certainly don't hate my parents.'

I put the necklace back on.

'What I hate… is this cycle. This 'Cycle of Hatred'... All this endless violence, pain, and suffering… doomed to repeat itself; to never end.'

I clenched my fist.

'...That's what I hate. I hate that people are cursed with this burden…"

I clenched it tighter.

'And I hate myself for not being able to do anything about it...'

…

...

(*K-PP...K-PP...K-PP*)

Yami was sitting up straight now, clapping slowly.

"Ahh, Hikari…" he smiled sincerely, "That was beautiful."

"Too bad it's wrong."

I promptly fell off the window onto my face.

"Wha...What do you mean it's wrong!?"

He shook his head, "You're getting closer. You've got the who down. You hate yourself… but the why, you got wrong."

"It's not something as grandeur as 'The Cycle of Hatred'..." he said, crossing his legs, "And it's not something as complex as 'The Meaning Behind Your Existence' either. It's so much more simple than that."

I sighed.

"So I'm overthinking this, eh?"

"Yep. And that's your second strike. Ya' got one more left."

I quirked a brow, "Wait, strikes? What the hell happens when I hit 3?"

He tapped his chin in thought.

"...Hm… I… I dunno' yet," he admitted, "Let me get back to you on that."

I sweatdropped.

BeeHive HQ

6:21 P.M.

(Tsugumi)

"We're back!"

We all turned, Onodera-sama and Ichijou Raku walking through, the former holding the door for the latter, whose arms were full, holding the cake box.

"Ichijou-kun…" Miyamoto-sama started, "Did you make sure Kosaki didn't 'taste' the cake while you weren't looking?

"R-Ruri, please!"

The Mistress and I giggled at that, Maiko smiling to himself across the room.

"So, do we all know the plan?" called Miyamura.

Yamada grinned and nodded, "It's a surprise gig, right? Naruto doesn't know about this 'till he shows up!"

"It's a surprise party in essence…" Itou chastised, "You don't have to spell it out for everyone."

"I know, geez'... Get off my back, Itou."

A lot of the guests had already shown up. There were, of course, our classmates, among them being Miyamura, Yamada, and the rest of the Supernatural Studies Club…

"Aw dude… I'm so excited!" said the short, orange-haired one.

"Shut up, Hinata…" the one with the shaved head muttered, "You might scare 'em off!"

"Oh, please, Ryuu…" grumbled Noya, "If anything, it's your weird face that'll push 'em away."

"Sh-Shut it!"

Then there were those volleyball players. The ones we met at the beach a while back? Apparently, they'd kept in contact with Ichijou (and Maiko, for some reason), and had been pretty excited at the prospect of a party with girls.

"Ah! Takeo-kun, watch out for the table!"

"O-Oh! Sorry, Yamato!"

And over there was the hulking teen, Takeo Gouda. We'd run into him earlier this year, after he helped Ichijou Raku rescue a pair of cats. With him was his girlfriend Rinko Yamato, who'd talked to us briefly before that incident, and their (apparently) attractive lady-killer friend Makoto Sunakawa.

'Wow...' I thought to myself, 'I never could've imagined knowing so many people...'

'And it's all because of...'

'...Right.'

I checked the clock. Five minutes to 6:30.

Time to get the birthday boy.

Naruto and Tsugumi's Apartment

6:24 P.M.

(Naruto)

(*...Snn*)

"!"

I cringed, pulling my hand away. It was a bad habit of mine to trace the Chidori scar whenever I got lost in thought, especially just reminiscing.

I had a similar habit with Konoha. Whenever I found myself missing the place, I'd either lightly trace my ANBU tattoo or run my finger over the imprint in my hitai-ate.

The latter two options were usually far less painful than that of the former.

Since it was the only serious wound to ever be inflicted while Kyuubi's chakra was preoccupied, it didn't heal properly. So I always got the jitters whenever I didn't brace myself.

And since it was still healed by demonic chakra, there wasn't much Tsunade-baa-chan could do. The work was already done, and everything still functioned. Short of tearing it apart and healing it again…

There was a reason I usually wore my necklace outside my shirt.

I turned back to face the clock. Half past six now.

I sighed. Would this day never end?

"That's an interesting scar. How'd you manage that?"

"!"

I spun around quickly, cracking my back in the process, at the sudden voice.

'Damn… I didn't even feel her presence.'

She hopped down from standing on the ledge and walked over, a slight clacking sound coming from her footsteps. She knelt and ran a slim digit across the outer part.

Spreading out from the fist-sized hole in the center were little marks, in small, jagged shapes. Prior to entering my shoulder, they'd been stray sparks, emitting from the lightning-covered hand.

I shivered under the touch of her delicate fingertips, the sensitivity of the flesh only magnifying the sensation. She switched to her index finger, tracing a circle on my skin.

Once she'd done that, she poked the center lightly.

"-Ita!"

I flinched and she pulled her hand back, holding it to her chest.

"A-Ah! I'm sor-"

Her words were lost as her eyes met mine. She looked up at my face, and I, down at hers, frozen. Not saying a word.

Time seemed to stop, the world around us unmoving, becoming some kind of monotone gray. The only things still in color were her and I.

We stayed like that for what seemed forever, neither of us saying a word.

…

...

She was the first to move, smiling as she stood. She wiped her pants at the knee, and spoke.

"Are you feeling better?"

I gave a small smile myself.

"...Yeah. I'm sorry about earlier."

She shook her head.

"Don't be. And I'm sorry for what I did. That was really insensitive of me."

I waved it off, "'Don't be'," I said, mimicking her, "I was pretty insensitive too."

She smiled.

"Well… anyway, get dressed. There's somewhere I want to take you."

I tilted my head in confusion, "And where would that be?"

"You'll see!" she said, "Now go!"

"Alright! Alright!" I put my hands up in a placating gesture as I turned around, walking back into the room.

"What's the dress code?" I asked, opening up my dresser.

"Casual," she said, shrugging, "So it doesn't matter."

"Great," I affirmed, pulling out a normal pair of pants, "Suits suck."

She pouted lightly, "That's because yours are all stiff. You never wear them, that's why."

"I don't wear them because they're stiff," I muttered.

"And they're stiff because you don't wear them!" she asserted.

I dropped the pants on the floor, stepping into them as I pointed.

"Hey, you wear blazers, dress shirts, and slacks all the time! You're totally biased!"

"And you wear sweatpants and jumpsuits all day," she deadpanned, "What's your point?"

"Hnngh…" I grumbled, throwing on a shirt, "Never mind, it's nothing. Let's get going already."

I grabbed my hitai-ate off the nightstand on the way out.

BeeHive HQ

Common

6:42 P.M.

(Raku)

"Dude… are you sure you know how to work that thing?" I asked nervously.

"Of course I do!" Shuu agreed happily, "Why? Do you doubt my DJ skills?"

"Of course I do," I deadpanned, "You were just taught an hour ago."

He shrugged, "Well, I guess I'm a quick learner. Don't worry man, it'll be fine!"

Across the room, I could hear:

"Chitoge-chan! You have the remote, right?"

"Right here, Kosaki-chan!" she said, holding it up, "This is gonna' be awesome!"

"Wait!" Miyamoto called, getting everyone to quiet down, "I think I hear them!"

Shuu made a waving motion to Tsubaki, standing by the door. Getting the message, she hit the lights, and we all crouched down.

(Moments Earlier)

Bonyari City

Rooftops

(*Fwooo…*)

…

(*Fwooooo…*)

Building after building soared by, as we cleared the residential area of the city. I was a few paces behind her, but that wasn't too much of an issue, since she was leading.

"I'm still not certain where we're headed."

"Maybe she's taking us to Booty Town."

'Guys...'

"Yeah! To Wang City?"

"To-"

'No,' I said firmly, cutting them both off, 'In case you didn't notice, this is the route to the mansion.'

"He's right," Yami realized, "So, a mission then?"

"No, that's not it," Kurama shot down, "The fleshbags have the day off, remember?"

"Oh, that's right!" he remembered.

"...So wait. Maybe she is gonna' sleep with us?" he proposed, "Didn't she just say that what you wore wouldn't matter?"

'...Hoo boy...'

"I like the way you think," Kurama observed, "And then her tracing your scar would be some kind of foreplay?"

…

'...Do you even know how human sex works, Kurama?'

"Of course I do. I was inside your mother when-"

'EW.'

"You holding up there, Whiskers?" she called over the wind, "We're getting close!"

"Y-Yeah!" I replied, "I'm fine! We're headed to the mansion, right?"

"Yep!"

"...I still think you're gonna' bang."

'Will you both shut up?'

(*FMP*)

We touched down within the courtyard, past the gates. I stretched my back out, while she adjusted her jacket.

"Go to the common room," she said, "I'll be waiting."

And she vanished in a blur.

"...Huh."

"See? You're totally having your pipes cleaned tonight!"

'I will come in there and scramble your insides.'

"That's what she said."

'GOD DAMMIT.'

I approached the metal door, placing a hand on it.

'There. See?' I sighed, 'I feel a ton of familiar energy signatures in there. The gang's probably still here.'

"Or maybe they're just here to watch?" Yami offered, "Maybe she's into that."

"Hm. I concur," he muttered, "The super-uptight ones are always the kinkiest."

'Will you shut up.'

I opened the door, walking into the dark room, closing it behind me.

"What the?"

Suddenly, the lights came on, and people leapt up, all shouting.

"SURPRISE!"

BeeHive HQ

Common

6:51 P.M.

(Tsugumi)

(Play: 'Mega Marital Problems: Instrumental' by Starbomb)

It was through the spinning strobe lights and their reflections on the disco ball. Through the blaring sound of music from the speakers to my back. Through the cheers of the people, the smiles, the laughter, the meets, the greets, the flirting of those volleyball players, the clumsiness of the hulking giant.

It was through the silliness of the Supernatural Studies Club, the ecstatic chatter of the girls, the crazy antics of the boys.

It was through the crowd where all the faces seemed to blend together…

It was there that I saw the boy at the center of it all.

His eyes met mine for the briefest of moments. He smiled. Not a cheap, throwaway grin, or one of those cheesy fox smirks either. A true, genuine smile.

And mouthed two words to me. Even if they were drowned out in the crowd, the cheers, the music, the lights… I didn't have to hear him to know what he said.

"Thank you."

BeeHive HQ

Common

7:58 P.M.

(Naruto)

(Play: 'I Choose You to Die: Instrumental' by Starbomb)

The party was crazy.

The place was filled with so many familiar faces. From our classmates, like the SNS Club, to those Volleyball guys from Karasuno High (who'd actually been gaining a bit of fame recently, if the amount of girls going over to talk to them was any indication).

Then there was the well-mannered behemoth that was Takeo Gouda. Turns out he actually helped with a lot of the decorations, taking input from both Kosaki, and his girlfriend (can you believe it?) Yamato.

"...Hm?"

I paused in the middle of my walking. That was weird. I think I've heard this song before.

...Eh. Probably something from the radio.

I met up with Cross and Chitoge. Apparently, they'd thrown this whole shebang together, Chitoge doing most of the planning, Cross helping out wherever he could.

I bumped into Tachibana as well. She quickly wished me a happy birthday and asked me if I'd seen Cross.

Of course, not wanting to sic the proverbial beast on him, I pointed in the opposite direction.

...On second thought, that was kinda' mean. I pulled her aside and pointed in a slightly less wrong direction.

Her 'Rakkun-senses' located him within the minute.

Afterward, I was approached by both Kosaki and Ruri. They both gave me gifts (a novel from the latter entitled 'The Walking Drum', and a DVD from the former) and after a bit of chatting, left me to my own devices.

Unfortunately, the only one I didn't get to talk to was…

...you guessed it. Tsugu.

Every time we tried to cross the room through the crowd, we'd be interrupted. Somebody would pull me aside to wish me a good one, and she'd get roped into helping out with something, or talking to the girls. She disappeared for a while, but she came back later, as I saw her face again.

This was it.

I slipped through the mass of people, pivoting left and right, spinning on my heel and such. Almost like a training exercise. From across the room, I could see her taking my example… though she was moving a bit slower than usual.

The music softened and the lights dimmed as people began to put two and two together, and got the idea. So they made sure to give us a wide girth, opening up a space with me at the center. And with a bit of light pushing, it was only a little while 'till she joined me.

She was lead through the crowd by Chitoge, holding her hand through the crowd. Upon realizing what was going on, I waved to my fellow blond, but froze upon her friend's entrance.

And by the gods, was it an entrance.

Someone had clearly made her up. I could see she was wearing some kind of eyeliner and… was that actually blush on her face? That was new.

Her hair was done up more neatly than usual, and she was even wearing earrings. She pursed her lips lightly, nervously, showing they had a new kind of shine to them.

And the dress. Damn.

It was reminiscent of the one she wore on our first mission in the States. The one to the Colony Ball. It was a midnight blue with black and turquoise highlights that made her eyes sparkle. She didn't have the black gloves on this time… but she did have heels, interestingly enough.

It wasn't anything fancy, but it wasn't exactly 'simple' either. It was her.

We were standing before each other, everyone watching. She averted her eyes in embarrassment.

I smiled.

"Way to make me feel underdressed," I joked, "I thought you said casual."

"I-I did…" she muttered, "But the Mistress insisted that I do this… for your birthday."

I frowned, "You didn't have to do that."

She looked up at me, "B-But I should! I mean…"

"...If it makes you happy, I guess…"

"!"

She blinked as I placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Hey… Don't think that way, alright?" I said, "You shouldn't have to make yourself suffer for my sake."

She almost pouted, "Do you not find this attractive?"

"Oh no, of course I do," I affirmed, "You look amazing, Tsugumi."

She looked up at me, "Then why-"

I shook my head, "If you don't like it, then don't do it. I don't want you to do anything you don't want to..."

"Naruto."

When I heard that voice, I turned back to face her.

"You've done so much for us all… for me. You've sacrificed so much… And we haven't done a damn thing for you in return."

"Of course you have," I smiled, "Just being my friend is good enough for me."

"Regardless of what you think…" she muttered, "We all owe you a great deal of debt."

"So then…

...Will you let me be the selfless one? Just this once?"

"!"

…

I smiled.

"...Alright then. If that's what you want…"

"...Then who am I to refuse?"

I took her hand in mine, and led her to the center of the circle.

The crowd somewhat dispersed during our conversation, but made their way back to the room's center, as the music came back. The strobe lights gradually shut off, leaving the slowly rotating disco ball (when did we get one of those?) as the only real light source.

The song ended, the DJ, Shuu, leaning into the mic.

"And now," he called, "Here's a little slow song, special for the birthday boy."

(Play: 'Objects of Desire' by NinjaSexParty)

People began to pair up, the volleyball boys with some girls, Takeo with his girlfriend, and Yamada with his.

Taking the initiative, I wrapped my arm around Tsugu's waist, my hand on her lower back. She lay her hand on my shoulder, the other hand still in mine. It didn't seem like she could move too comfortably in those shoes… so we just swayed back and forth to the rhythm.

"Ah… this takes me back," I said, "Reminds me of our first mission in America. Remember we had to learn to waltz?"

She raised a thin eyebrow, "I remember you stepping on my toes a lot. Klutz."

I chuckled lightly, and slowly (so she didn't trip) began to go through the steps.

The lyrics started.

"Since I moved into your place,

One year ago, today,

Our relationship has deepened

In a spiritual way."

My steps faltered. Wait a second.

"As time swept gently forward

And winters turned to spring

I know you so much better…"

God dammit.

"'Cause I fucked all your things."

Tsugumi almost tripped.

"What the hell is this song?" she hissed.

"It's a 'NinjaSexParty' song," I laughed, "I remember hearing it a while back."

At that, she looked over at the DJ and glared, rolling up her metaphorical sleeve.

"Hey, hey!" I pulled her back into my arms, "You don't have to go and do that. It's fine."

She frowned, "But your birthday-"

"Trust me," I smiled, "I've had far worse. Besides, it's fine. I'm kinda' into it."

She tilted her head lightly, shrugged and sighed.

"A whole year later, and your logic is still just as confusing," she said, smiling.

I shrugged, "S'what I do."

"I boned your couches and your telephone

And all your scented candles

And your dictionary, fishtank, and the pictures on the mantle

I had sex with your whole kitchen

With no boundaries or limits

And your lamp was looking so good

That you know I had to hit it."

Apparently, some of the English speaking crowd had different thoughts on this particular piece of art. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Ruri storm up and slug Shuu across the face. The song itself managed to drown out the sounds of the beating that ensued.

But despite the song… despite the date, despite the history, and despite all odds…

That night, I found myself slow-dancing with the girl of my dreams.

She lay her head against my chest, and I lay my head on hers. Her hair smelled like lavender and strawberries…like always.

Even if she looked different, I knew she was the same.

"...I know I said it already…" I murmured, "But I never got to say it properly. So I'll say it again."

She looked up at me, eyes expectant. I smiled once more.

"Thank you, Tsugumi. For everything."

And the way she smiled made my heart skip a beat.

"Not a problem, Naruto."

And she put her head back… as did I.

'Dammit...' I thought to myself, 'I really...'

'...love this girl... don't I?'

...

It… was autumn.

"I'm glad I got this off my chest...

October Tenth… The day I absolutely loathed.

My soul has taken flight.

And it was on that day that I realized.

Don't slam the door on your way out darling…"

That I was in love with Tsugumi Seishirou.

Because I'm slamming it tonight."

…

...

"See? There," I heard, "Now was that so hard?"

And we're done.

I don't have much to say here. I'm bloody exhausted.

Once again, I apologize for the delays regarding this chapter. I just didn't want to put out something rushed and crappy.

But hey, still faster than Gavedin, am I right?

...What happened to all his stories anyway?

Ehh… whatever. I know I have 'The Emergence of Uzumaki Naruto' backed up in pdf format somewhere in my Google Drive. So I should be good.

And to every one of you readers who've come this far?

Thank you. I'll see you all next time.

'Til then.

-Objection234 (Akane Sasu Sora on YouTube)

P.S. I totally forgot to mention this! On my Youtube channel (my personal one with the same name) I've posted the first 40 minutes of a Nisekoi: Yomeiri!? playthrough and my live reaction! If you want to see my stupid face, go check it out!