A/n: Thanks to TheFoundersDaughter for updating "Amy", Teal06 for updating "The Next Step" and Melanie-Baker for updating "Time Frame Clash". It's great to have so much C/7 to read. :D
"Seven, are you sure you don't want to sit down?" Kolopak asked carefully as he observed her staring blankly out of the docking station's window to the gleaming blue seas of Earth below.
"Borg do not…" She began tersely without moving her gaze from the swirling patches of cloud, biting her lips as she corrected herself and turned her head to face her guardian before saying in a contrite murmur, "I'd…rather stand, thank you."
Kolopak sat back in one of the waiting area's uncomfortable chairs with a sigh, at least her rejection had been well mannered, and he knew she was tense about Chakotay's arrival so decided not to push her. "Transport 45890, Deep Space Three to Earth, now docking in Docking Bay 1." The Computer droned out from speakers somewhere above them.
Kolopak smiled in Seven's direction, "We're in the right place, he should be here any minute now." Seven nodded in acknowledgement of the comment but didn't follow Kolopak in moving closer to the doors Chakotay would soon be walking through, she had a feeling she would be the last person he wanted to see. She found her eyes travelling over her cybernetic hand, which gripped the edge of the window so tightly it looked even more inhuman than normal, how close had a similarly abused hand come to assimilating Chakotay? She shut her eyes as old memories, ones that were not strictly her own in the human sense but very much a part of her, overwhelmed her and screams filling her ears… A real voice, Kolopak's, broke the spell, "Chakotay!"
She wheeled around so quickly the hood obscuring her facial implants slipped momentarily, but she had time to fix it as the father and son embraced tightly, Chakotay's face hidden in his father's broad shoulder but she heard a murmur of "Thanks Dad…" as they finally pulled back and she got a proper view of his face. The rational side of her knew he was uninjured and felt relief, but she was also shocked by how hollow his handsome face was and creased with a permanent look of strain and exhaustion.
Kolopak of course noticed all the things Seven did, and many more, squeezing his son's shoulders supportively, "We were thinking of taking you home, are you alright with that?"
Chakotay ran a hand through his hair, his expression slightly glazed. "Yeah…I'm fine with that for now." He replied quietly, picking his small bag off the floor and swinging it over his shoulder.
"Right, good then." Kolopak replied after an uncertain pause, he'd really expected more resistance to his plan and felt worry sink deeper into his soul at his son's out of character lifelessness. He hurriedly beckoned Seven over, "Let's all go then, shall we?"
Seven watched Chakotay nod before following suit, peering into his face as she said, with her voice thick with unusual emotional sincerity, "I am relieved that you have returned unharmed Chakotay." The look she got in return was vacant, yet oddly piercing, as if he were looking straight through her, could feel her unease, but utterly ignored her. A shudder ran through her that she couldn't entirely hide, and desperately she spoke to fill the silence, "I…I am informed that you were promoted to Lieutenant…for your valour…" She stammered.
"Yes, well done son. I'm proud of you." Kolopak said warmly.
Chakotay pulled out of his father's grasp, "Valour?" he said bitterly, "The only thing I did different from others is survive." With that he began to stride ahead, "Which docking port are we going to Dad?" he asked abruptly.
"Number 5, son." Kolopak answered with a heavy note of sadness in his voice. "Come on Seven." She obeyed, but kept herself at least five paces behind them at all times. This was even worse than she had imagined, she had anticipated somewhat the hot flame of hatred, which she had hoped would fade in time, but not him acting as if she were not there, blocking out her existence entirely, she had no idea how to cope with that…
The four day trip home was excruciating for all three of them. By the time they finally returned home, Kolopak could no longer tolerate the barrier that had formed between his son and adoptive daughter, he knew it was because of the trauma of the battle, but he also highly doubted Seven's unspoken, but obvious, belief that Chakotay now hated her, in fact he had a feeling that Chakotay needed Seven if he was going to get over this, and it was with these thought in mind that he entered Chakotay's room, Chakotay slumped over the desk, fingering his two Starfleet gold pips. Gingerly, Kolopak put his hand on his shoulder, "You know, you're shutting out the one person who could possibly understand what you're going through."
Chakotay sat up sharply, "What? I don't know who you mean!" he said defensively.
Kolopak gave a small smile, "Seven."
Chakotay blanched and drew back, "Seven? No…I can't…"
"Now why not? I know you don't suddenly hate her, if that were the case you would've exploded at her by now." He caught Chakotay glancing down and smiled regretfully, "She was worried about you, is worried about you now…"
"I know…" Chakotay choked out, "I can't speak to her, every time I see her face I see the faces of the drones I had to shoot, they were so like her…when we first freed her, and even though they're all murdering shells of beings, who killed and assimilated without thought… I still feel guilty about killing them! Sprits, if it hadn't been for the things I learned from Seven, they'd have got all 40 ships…" His voice cracked and he looked at his father pleadingly, "What I can I do?"
"Chakotay, you may not believe me now, but you've grown so much from the boy that left this house. There is no shame in feeling this level of guilt and confliction, taking something's life should never be easy, but the drones have lost so much that for them it is, that is truly pitiful."
"I never want to be like that Dad! Seven wanted to go back, she still wants to go back…" Chakotay said tightly.
"Talk to her, face your demons about this, I assure you Seven of Nine is not one of them." Kolopak ended the conversation there, leaving Chakotay to think it over.
The cheerily shining sun seemed to be mocking Chakotay as he stepped outside into the garden where Seven stood, half-heartedly playing with Lucky. Cautiously he walked up behind her and tapped her on the shoulder, making her jump violently, her face flushing as she realised who it was. "We need to talk." He told her quietly.
She had to take a deep breath before nodding, keeping her eyes averted from his. "Where?"
"Somewhere cooler than out here." He replied, rubbing his already sweat dampened brow.
She studied the ground for a minute, the glanced at the hyperactive dog hopefully placing a ball at her feet. "We could go to that cave, the one where we found Lucky."
"Okay…" He agreed apprehensively and they began the walk in a silence that continued until they'd slipped behind the waterfall and into the cool, protective dark of the cave.
Seven waited until his back was completely turned on her before she spoke, her voice cold with saddened certainty, "You hate me. You remembered what I was, what I am, and that is a…a monster."
The lump forming in Chakotay's throat burst into in a frustrated cry at the last word and he spun around to face her, his eyes burning with emotion. "It's not you that I hate, it's the entire thing! That I had to kill things that were once people, that such evil is possible, that all my friends are dead… It's not fair that I'm going to be guilty and scared for the rest of my life…"
"How do you think I feel? All you did was defend yourself and others, free drones from the chains of the Collective, but I…" Her voice froze as tears filled her eyes but she forced them back, "I was complicit, I hate them more than you ever can and yet I fear that I can't live without them…" She felt her legs start to buckle as the words left her throat as a near scream but suddenly Chakotay's arms were around her holding her up.
"You are living without them Seven, right now." He breathed into her ear. She could feel his body shaking, in tandem with hers, but then the loudest explosion she'd ever heard made the ground itself shudder and they were wrenched apart.
"What was that?" Chakotay choked out in shock, their passionate exchange forcibly forgotten.
Seven didn't look at him, instead using her enhanced eye to study the looming shapes in the sky that blotted out the sun. "Cardassians." She whispered brokenly.
A/n: I'm not really happy with this chapter, but PLEASE REVIEW! :D