A/N: Hey guys! First off, I just want to say thank you to all the people who have been reviewing. I've had some really sweet comments and a lot of encouragement. As this is my first fanfic, it really means a lot to me and it makes me want to keep writing. So thank you for that! Anyway, I'll stop being sappy now. Here is a long chapter for you guys and it includes some things I'm sure you'll like, including some flirty Remus and some secret rendezvous ;). As always, read and review if you enjoy it!
Chapter 10: Secret Meetings
"YOU DID WHAT NOW?!"
Natalie had jumped up off the bed at my proclamation and was now standing in front of me, jaw practically on the floor.
"I KISSED HIM! I KISSED REMUS!" I shouted as I grabbed Natalie around the waist and picked her up and started swinging her around in a circle. She started laughing and hugged me quickly before she leaned back. "Really?! Oh my god, how? When?" She scrambled out of my arms and pulled me to sit down. "Tell me everything!
"Ok, first things first, this morning Sirius pulled me aside in the hallway…" I Natalie a play by play of my entire day, starting with the bombshell I got this morning all the way through the kiss. She listened with rapt attention, and gave girly squeals at the appropriate moments. She is the perfect little sidekick, I thought to myself appreciatively. After I finished, she immediately launched in question mode.
"So how was this kiss? Do you wanna do it again? How do you even kiss, none of my other friends have had one yet. Are you guys gonna kiss and hold hands and do all the couple things now that you're dating? Wait, are you even dating? Are you-"she suddenly was cut off as I pressed a hand over her mouth to silence the barrage of questions.
"Whoa girl, slow down. To answer your questions, the kiss was…"I couldn't help but give a small sigh and I'm sure I had a dopey look on my face "…the kiss was fantastic. Short, but perfect. And I would love to do it again. As far as the how, I'm not really the best person to ask…that was my first kiss." Natalie interrupted me.
"Wait that was your first kiss? But how? You're so pretty!" she said with complete shock.
I stared back at her, a bit stunned as well. "Um…well, I mean I'm not really that special…but I mean even if I was pretty, I'm the outcast remember?" I said a bit awkwardly. She looked thoughtful, but nodded her head anyway. "Yea, I guess the outcast does pose a bit of problem. But you are very pretty. Or at least, I think you are." She said with a small smile and reached out to pat my hand.
You are just the perfect little sweet angel sent from heaven when you aren't being a mouthy 11 year old. I thought to myself as I squeezed her hand affectionately in return. "Anyway, back to questions, I don't actually know about the dating, so I can't really answer them. I wouldn't mind, but I'm not sure about him…"
And I really wasn't sure. Over the years, Remus had never really publicly dated anyone. I, of course, noticed this fact and always hoped it was because he was secretly pining away for me in return, but let's be honest here, there was no way that was the reason. Maybe he doesn't like relationships. Or labels? Or maybe he has some huge secret he's hiding? Who knows, as long as he keeps kissing me, I don't really care.
I shook my head to clear my thoughts and looked back at Natalie. She grinned and gave me another hug. "I'm really happy for you Lauren. And I'm sure you'll find out about the dating thing soon enough." She laughed quietly.
I laughed along with her, but I couldn't help the thought that crossed my mind as I thought about having to see Remus tomorrow.
What the hell am I gonna say to him?
/
The next day I woke up feeling a bit giddy still, but some nerves were creeping in. What do you say to someone you kissed yesterday? Good morning? Hey, wanna make out? Do I just plant one on him? What if he doesn't want to kiss me again? Oh my gosh, WHAT IF HE DOESN'T WANT TO KISS ME AGAIN?
I had essentially worked myself into a full blown panic by the time I left the common room. As I walked down the corridor, I was suddenly thrown into full déjà vu mode as someone grabbed my arm and pulled me sideways, this time into a classroom. Thinking it was Sirius again, I turned angrily towards the source of the pulling and began to yell.
"Dammit Sirius! I told you not to do that again! What the bloody hell is-"I stopped mid-sentence, surprised to see not an annoyingly handsome boy with a black mop of hair wearing a smirk, but a different annoyingly handsome boy with sandy hair and gorgeous eyes standing in front of me. He was standing with his hands held up as he stared at me, a bit affronted by my sudden yelling. Thank God I didn't come out swinging like last time "Remus! I'm sorry, I didn't realize it was you."
He put his hands down and laughed nervously. "Uh, yea I could tell. Why did you think I was Sirius? Does he often pull you into dark rooms suddenly?" he laughed again. Although he was obviously kidding, I couldn't help the blush that began to creep across my face at what he was implying. "What?! No, of course not, it was just the one time!" I stopped again, realizing I'd only dug myself in deeper.
Remus raised an eyebrow at my statement. "Just the one time? And what, may I ask, happened "just the one time"?" he said with a hint of a smirk.
Shit. "Uh, nothing, he just had to tell me something…"
Remus's smirk got bigger. "Oh really? And what was so important that he had to pull you aside into a dark room by yourself?" The blush that had been slowly growing now shot across my face at rapid speed. Fuck. What do I say?! I can't tell him that Sirius told me about how Remus feels about me. Shit!
I stared at Remus panicking as I tried to think of a lie. "Uh…" was all I managed to get out. Smooth Lauren. You're lying skills are top notch today. So eloquent.
Remus tried to keep a serious face, but his amusement won out as he began to laugh loudly. I couldn't quite join him as I was still embarrassed, but I will admit I enjoyed that I had been the one to make him laugh so much, even if it was unintentional. He straightened up as he quieted down. "You, Lauren Dixon, are quite amusing when you get flustered."
"Yea, well you're a bit of a bastard for making me so flustered on purpose," I said sassily as I crossed my arms, trying to act offended. It wasn't very convincing however, as I couldn't manage to wipe the smile off my face.
Suddenly, Remus got a very devious smirk on his face that, once again, was very reminiscent of Sirius. He took a step towards me and said "I think you like that I'm a bit of bastard."
He took another step toward me and my body unconsciously took a step back as I uncrossed my arms. I didn't get very far before I felt the wall press into my back. Remus kept inching forward until he was right in front of me, his eyes never leaving mine and that damn attractive smirk still on his face. He put his hands out to rest them on the wall on either side of me, effectively boxing me in. Not that I would have moved if I could have.
"Not going to deny it then?" he said quietly. I was very distracted by his closeness, but I tried my best to continue this little flirting thing we had going on. "Nope, I don't like it. Not one bit," I said as seriously as I could.
His smirk got a bit bigger as he leaned in closer, chest almost touching mine. "Really? Not even a little bit?"
"Nope," I said, popping the p for emphasis.
"Hmm, well I guess I'll just have to convince you then." And with that he leaned down and pressed his lips on mine.
Holy hell, I have died and gone to heaven, I thought as I practically melted into him.
This kiss was completely different than the two last night. The first two had been short and sweet. This one…this one felt like pure electricity. I felt like I didn't have complete control of my hands anymore and I couldn't stop them roaming. First they started on his chest, then they moved up to his shoulders, then to his neck and into his hair. How the fuck does this guy make his hair so soft? My hands spent a while there before they made their way back to his chest and then kept moving south. As they grazed his stomach, he tensed. My mind caught up with my hands and I froze for a second as well. He pulled away and I looked up, afraid I had gotten ahead of myself. Fuck, too much. He glanced down to where my hands were still grazing his waist and then back up at me. I was about to pull my hands back before he shot me a quick smile and leaned back in.Except this time, his hands left the wall where they had been beside me and wrapped his arms around my back, pulling me completely against him. Guess it wasn't too much then, was the last coherent thought I had.
/
I walked into the Great Hall about 15 minutes later, feeling dreamy and hoping I didn't look like I had just been snogging in empty class 5 minutes ago. Remus looked presentable at least, so I figured I couldn't be much worse. Remus actually seemed almost…smug. He had a bit of saunter in his step that normally wasn't present. Generally, I didn't like that look on guys, but he pulled it off well. Maybe it was just because I happened to be part of the reason he looked so smug.
I broke my gaze away from Remus as we sat down at the table, where the Marauders sat still partially asleep, Lily looking bright and alert next to them. We both said hello as we reached for plates. As I reached for the toast, my hand brushed Remus's and my gaze shot up to his. He just smirked at me and passed me the piece of bread on top. I blushed at the look on his face and turned back to my plate. I just snogged the boy 5 minutes ago in the dark and yet I still blush when he barely touches me in public. What the fuck, dude? I nibbled on my toast and looked up to peer around the room only to be met by a strange sight.
Lily was staring at me with a look of dawning comprehension tinged with some disbelief. Her eyes flicked between me and Remus, who thankfully seemed unaware of the attention. Suddenly, she stood from the table abruptly and announced "Lauren, I need your help with something for Potions. Come with me yea?" Her gaze told me that I probably should just say yes and get the upcoming interrogation over with. I sighed, shoving the rest of my toast in my mouth in what I'm sure was an attractive gesture and mumbled out a see you. Remus shook his head with a small smile on his face as he took in my charming behavior and said his goodbyes. The other boys barely even raised their heads from where they were almost passed out in their plates.
I met Lily at the end of the table and she grabbed my arm tightly and practically dragged me out the door and down the hall to a deserted bathroom. Once we reached our destination, she released my arm and I rubbed it, feeling a bit bruised from her grip. Lord have mercy, this girl is deceptively strong! She could try out for fucking Gryffindor beater with that arm strength.
Once she had glanced around to make sure we were alone, she shot a spell at the door to lock it and quickly wheeled on me.
"What in Merlin's name is going on between you and Remus?!" she practically squealed. Surprised as I was at the outright girlishness of her question, I couldn't help the slight blush that stained my cheeks.
"Lily…" I muttered out, a little embarrassed to be talking about it. She put her hands on her hips and rolled her eyes.
"Oh, don't even give me that shy attitude now, Lauren. You just walked in with Remus looking the smuggest I have ever seen him while you looked completely and utterly snogged. So once again, I'll ask, what is going on with you and Remus?
You aren't leaving here until you fess up so you might as well give her the dirty details. I sighed and began to speak. "Well…first off, I've actually had a, uh…a bit of crush on Remus for while…" I said as I rubbed my face a bit sheepishly. She looked surprised. "Really? How long?"
"Um…since like second year…" God, that's a lot more pathetic when I have to say it out loud.
Lily's eyes widened, but she masked her shock, thankfully. "Well, I hadn't noticed anything at all until about a week ago so you hid it well."
"Thanks, I guess…Anyway, so him and I have become closer recently and well, the other day Sirius and the other guys figured out my crush and then they told me they thought I should go for it. Sirius even said they thought that Remus liked me back.
Lily smiled at that statement. "Yea, I'd agree with that. Wasn't so obvious before, but like I said, the past week or so there have definitely been signs. Anyway, that still doesn't explain your frazzled appearance this morning.
I cleared my throat. "Well, last night, I somehow managed to find some bravery somewhere and I-I…I just planted one on him!
Lily's jaw dropped and she squeaked out a "WHAT?!"
At this point I couldn't control my words anymore and they just tumbled out. "Yea, so I just ran up and kissed him and then I immediately freaked out and was like "shit, what the fuck am I doing?" so I pulled away and tried to apologize, but then he kissed me! And it was great!" I took a deep breath and continued," until this morning, when I completely worked myself into a panic thinking he would tell me he actually wasn't interested, but then he pulled me into a dark classroom this morning as I was walking to class and I don't actually know what he pulled me in there for, but we ended up snogging for like 15 minutes!" I finished my tale, panting from the amount of talking I'd just done.
Lily started jumping up and down screaming. "OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!" I couldn't help but smile at her enthusiasm. She finally stopped jumping and began to speak again. "I am seriously so happy for you two! You will be so cute! I can't believe I didn't think of it before!" I smiled shyly, but I was secretly pleased. She continued. "So how was this kissing? I've actually always wondered if Remus was a good kisser or not," she said with a wink.
I blushed, but answered her question. "Well, I don't have anyone to compare it to, but…it was fantastic…God, Lily, it was like I was melting into a puddle this morning! Seriously, I see what all the fuss was about now. And Remus…I'll tell you this, that boy can act a lot more like Sirius than you would think." Lily laughed loudly at that proclamation. "Really? I guess I shouldn't be that shocked. He is a Marauder for a reason after all." I joined in on her laughter and we giggled for a few moments.
After our laughter had subsided, Lily suddenly gave me a curious look. "Wait, you said you didn't have anyone to compare to…was that your first kiss?
I blushed and nodded. Geez, it's so much worse admitting it to another 17 year old than it is to an 11 year old.
She honestly looked shocked though. "I really can't believe that. I mean, I know you aren't the most popular girl around," I snorted at that understatement of the century. Lily continued on, "but you're gorgeous so I figured it would have happened by now," she said casually.
I blinked in astonishment. "Gorgeous? I don't know about all that…" Lily rolled her eyes. "Oh, hush Lauren. You are literally so pretty, with your long legs and freckles and green eyes. You could give any girl a run for their money in the looks department."
I simply blinked at her again, trying to process this new information. "Well, I'm still not sure I believe that, but thank you…that's sweet of you to say." I said with a small smile. She smiled back and looked at her watch.
"We should go," she sighed as she unlocked the door and began to leave. Before she opened the door, I grabbed her arm to stop her.
"Was it that obvious?" I winced as I asked.
"Was what obvious?" she asked, looking confused.
"The fact that I looked snogged this morning,"
She started laughing again and opened the door. "Honey, every girl was jealous of your morning the moment you walked in."
I groaned and followed her out the door.