----Chapter 10

Lois winced. "Cousin, I sincerely hope that the meaning of 'nothing' has changed to include 'something' in the last eleven years."

"Sorry, no such luck." Lois watched her cousins expression sober a little bit. "There was no physical damage on the MRI or CT scans, nor has there been any discovered with the a couple newer types of scan more recently. Clark's scanned you three dozen times with his x-ray vision and hasn't found anything either, though I doubt he ever really expected to."

"So what could it be?"

"They think it's psychological."

Lois stood and started walking circles around the room. "Are you kidding me? Do these doctors think I have some extraordinary love for 2008 or something?"

"No. The working theory was and still is that the attack is still in your subconscious and those memories bleed into your dreams. The resets, if you will, only occur at night. When things start getting too vivid, doctors think that your mind has a post traumatic stress disorder moment and your amnesia comes back, leaving with your memory from before the attack."

"Unbelievable. Not only does my mind have a reset button, but apparently I got manhandled by my cousin the first time it happened." Lois looked at Chloe flatly, who started to look a little sheepish.

"In my defense I was feeling kind of high strung at the time. Had to plan a big honkin' wedding, which ended up small, thank goodness. I was under the impression that you actually did remember things and were just sticking to a joke too long."

Chloe sighed and smiled . "It wasn't my best day, at least not at the time. Looking back, though, for as bad a day it was it turned out to be one of the most important nights of my life."

Lois frowned, confused by the statement. "How so?"

"Well, what with the being distraught over my cousin's mental malady, Bruce stayed with me while you were in the hospital that night. I was not all that happy with the world and wanted reassurance that there was still some good in it. Bruce made sure I did not lose my faith in the world, despite his views on it, and that was the night we made Jack. "

The confession made Lois laugh. "Jeez, Chlo, not only do you bond with your future husband while watching me be comatose, but you conceive your first child the night the extent of my mental injuries show themselves! I feel like you should be paying me some sort of finders fee for your life."

"And hey, I can afford the price you'd probably charge now." That just sent the cousins into a short fit of laughter that Lois really enjoyed. As confusing as everything had been, she was starting to feel less overwhelmed than she had been. She decided that she could be far worse off than in a year she wasn't familiar with. Fighting against it was getting her nowhere anyway.

She plopped herself down on one of the chairs facing the couch, trying to regain some breath as Chloe did the same. She saw Jordan walking into the livingroom and head straight for her. 'Less overwhelmed,' she quickly reminded herself. She hope that Jordan wouldn't have to find out about any of her memory issues until she was old enough to understand, or perhaps thirty, whichever came first. She hoped the same thing for Almond Joy. Damn, now they had her doing it!

She watched as Jordan walked up to her and smiled. She could remember doing something similar herself as a kid when she wanted something. "Mommy, I'm hungry. May I have some ice cream?" Lois didn't know if it was too late for Jordan to have ice cream, but got an idea that absolved her of liability. She bent down to Jordan's ear and whispered to her, fighting not to break out into a smile.

Jordan quickly turned and walked over to Chloe, who smiled and looked confused all at once. Lois did her best to hide a smile behind her hand. "Mommy says that since you probably spoil your niece rotten you should help her out with something that makes her teeth rotten."

Lois recognized the smile Chloe began wearing before answering Jordan. She'd seen it numerous times when she'd pulled something Chloe thought clever but was annoyed that she didn't do it herself. "Honey, I would love to help. Why don't you head over to the kitchen and I'll be there in a second." Jordan smiled and ran into the kitchen. Lois noted she was nearly bouncing in anticipation.

Chloe walked over to Lois and sat down on the arm of the chair. "Cheap, cuz, very cheap. Not wanting to get up, are we?"

Lois smirked up at her. "What you get for manhandling me the first time I forgot and actually letting me know about it. Plus, as I hear told, I'm far more pregnant than you are currently so I should have to do less. Also, truth be told, all I did today was throw up extensively for about 15 minutes, eat and be confused, but I'm as exhausted as I am when I run five miles."

Chloe eyed her a second then smiled softly. "It's because of the pregnancy. Takes a toll on the body. Fine, you get a free pass this time. Next time, though, I'm not standing for such shenanigans, forgetful or not."

Lois laughed. "Shenanigans? Seriously?"

Chloe stood up and rolled her eyes. "One has to watch her language around kids, Lo. Had I said what I would have in 2008, your little girl over there would have singed ears. And next time, you get to work through the pregnancy induced exhaustion like I have to." Chloe walked over to Jordan and picked her up, setting her on the counter and talking to her about her own love of ice cream.

There was a sudden gust of wind and Lois turned her head to see Clark standing there watching Chloe and Jordan. Her eyes trailed down his body and then back up as she took in the blue spandex, red underwear and cape. She wanted to say something but found her ability to speak gone.

"Don't believe a word of what Chloe just said, Lo. Bruce and Alfred have waited on her hand and foot during each pregnancy, including the current one."

Lois really wanted to speak. She felt that a conversation would have gone much better were she involved, but all she could do was stare at Clark. Finally, she managed to get her jaw moving. "Wow..."

Clark looked down at her and noticed he was still in costume. "Oh, right," he muttered. In a blink Lois found that he was in jeans, a t-shirt and glasses again. He pushed them up off the lower part of his nose and gave a sheepish smile. All she could feel was disappointment that the costume was gone and quickly found herself questioning that feeling.

"And for the record, Chloe, before you go around and start denying it, you do spoil your niece rotten. Not that we're complaining, of course. We'd spoil your kids too if we knew how many you were going to have. I only say that because I could have sworn hearing you say something about Aly and Liz's pregnancy being your last. Something about three kids being plenty, wasn't it?"

Chloe walked back into the living room, smirking. She carried Jordan, who was clutching a bowl of ice cream like it was her most precious possession in the world. Lois watched as they headed right for her and quickly had her lap filled by a small child. Jordan wiggled around a couple times getting comfortable and soon started spooning ice cream either into her mouth or on her face. It was hard for Lois to tell where more went.

She looked down at Jordan a second before looking back up at Chloe and Clark with pleading eyes. They both only smiled back, apparently thinking she needed to bond with her daughter. She watched Chloe turn to Clark and apparently start up their conversation again.

"We planned on concluding our family with the girls. We both thought that three kids was a nice total; you don't have too many kids to keep track of and when they're grown up their kids will have multiple aunts and uncles."

Clark held up a hand to her as Lois watched them with one eye and Jordan with the other. She had taken the spoon from Jordan and was alternating the ice cream between Jordan's mouth and her own. "Hold on, Chlo," Clark said. "You're planning your family based on what your grandchildren may have?"

"Clark, I had my own life planned by the time I was twelve. How is this a surprising revelation?" Clark held up his hands in faux-surrender and Chloe continued. "Well, with three kids, one of the many things that you do have is an imbalance. Three girls including me, two guys including Bruce. So, I figured we could correct the imbalance. Bruce was all for evening the scale."

"I know Alfred is old, Chloe, but I think he still counts as a guy, which makes things even at three."

"Bruce made the same argument for about fifteen seconds, but then hopped aboard, so to speak."

Lois saw Clark roll his eyes as she licked the spoon that no longer had ice cream to give her as he spoke. "Of course he was all for it, Chloe. Not only does he love your kids but it means you and he are going to be... together... a lot. At least at some specific times. Seriously, you had Batman walking a little funny when you two were trying for the girls."

Chloe blushed and cleared her throat. "Anyway, the mind is willing and the body able, so we decided to go for another boy."

"And what happens if you guys have another girl?"

Chloe grinned mischievously. "I have more chances for another boy in a couple years when I've forgotten what labor is like again."

"You guys are going to end up with twelve kids, Chloe."

"We could be 'Cheaper By The Dozen: Billionaire Version' if they ever do a remake of the movies," Chloe said as she smiled. "Though, I think my uterus may stage an intervention if we get to eight."

Lois held Jordan close, who she noted seemed to be listening to the conversation with an interested face. She hoped Clark's super genes weren't letting her learn what was beyond her need to know. "You really love having children, don't you?"

Both Chloe and Clark looked at her, Clark surprised at the interjection and Chloe smiling softly, almost too herself. "I miss having a newborn. Holding a child that you've felt grow and move inside you to become a small person... those moments are the some of the best in my life." She rubbed small circles on her stomach a couple times below her navel. "Even if this little one is a girl, it'll be a little girl that has my whole heart like only three other people on the Earth do."

Chloe sighed, contentedly Lois thought, and looked up at Clark as she continued. "Can I see myself having a huge family? No. I'm sure I'll be saying the same thing I said with Liz and Aly's pregnancy, that this will be the last. But, once my current gestating child is older and doing more things on his or her own, who knows?" She shrugged and grinned widely. "Maybe there'll be another one in the future, if for nothing else than getting to know that love again. Lord knows it won't strain the purse strings."

Laughing, she looked back down to Lois, about to say something but stopping as Lois wiped away a tear. Listening to everything that Chloe said, she finally started realizing just exactly what she was losing now and would lose in the future. She'd hoped she could hold it back, but her eyes were starting to win the battle. Chloe looked up to Clark, who motioned towards Jordan. Lois saw Chloe nod as she kneeled down by the chair.

"Jordan, you want to come with me to your room and show your Aunt Chloe your favorite toys?"

Jordan nodded and squirmed down off of Lois's lap, setting her bowl down on the coffee table and taking off for her room. Chloe gave Lois a half smile and patted her on the leg a couple times before following her.

Clark kneeled down in front of her and placed a hand on her knee, rubbing it up and down her leg a couple times before speaking. "What's wrong, Lo?"

"I'm never going to get to remember what she said, am I? I'll know the feelings she described for a little while, but in the long run I won't get to remember any of it. I won't remember my children being born, or their first steps, or their love..." Lois barely got the last words out, her sobs coming as her walls crumbled under the wight of forthcoming realizations.

Clark tried to embrace her, but she pushed him away. "Why don't I get to remember, Clark?" She covered her hands with her face and let it all out, feeling a hand placed on her back. She found it to be more comforting than it should be and found herself leaning into an embrace that finally got a hold of her. She sobbed into Clark's shoulder, grieving for memories she had lost and memories she knew she would forget.

Lois composed herself a little while later, feeling as if a weight had been lifted off of her. She still felt like the world was against her, but the feeling of being overwhelmed was replaced by wanting to live for the time she had. "Am I going to forget again soon, Clark?"

He pulled away from the hug a little and looked her in the eye. "How soon are you talking about?"

"While I'm pregnant."

"I don't know. We can't know, really. Based on Jordan's pregnancy, though, I would say probably not. You only forgot the once while she was in-utero."

She nodded. She needed to make the most of her time with her daughter. 'Woah... I just thought of her as my daughter.' The realization crushed all the sorrow she'd been feeling. "Oh god, my daughter," she said out loud. Clark looked at her funny as her eyes went wide. Lois was hit by a lot of feelings she couldn't describe, but knew were all directed towards Jordan.

She jumped out of the chair and bolted into Jordan's room, moving past Chloe and pulling Jordan into a tight embrace.

She just held her, smiling, holding her daughter. "I love you so much, baby girl. You have no idea how much I love you and will always love you, even if I act strangely sometimes." It scared her how much she meant those words; she knew right then that she loved the girl in her arms more than anything she'd ever known.

Holding her baby girl, for the first time that day like she meant it, Lois felt like she belonged right where she was.

Noting that Chloe had left the room, Lois walked out of Jordan's room with the little girl on her hip. They smiled at each other as she walked with Lois placing a kiss on her temple. "I love you so much, baby girl," she murmured. "More than you'll ever know."

She walked slowly out to the kitchen where Clark and Chloe stood watching her. Chloe was the first to speak as she wiped away what Lois thought a tear of joy. "I guess I was right in suggesting something might click tonight, eh Lois?"

Lois just smiled back and hugged Jordan a little closer. "It really did click." She looked at Clark, who seemed a bit more wary. She rubbed Jordan's back the same way everybody had rubbed hers during the day. "Something wrong, daddy?"

She didn't know if he smiled at being called daddy or her sounding sincere. "No, nothing's wrong mommy. The way you suddenly ran out of here, though, made me wonder if..."

"No, not remember. Realization. Realization that crushed earlier realizations like annoying, sad bugs." She smiled and looked at Jordan again. "This is my baby girl, and despite whatever may be going on in my head, she comes first. Always. Same for our unborn baby. Nothing will get in the way of me loving them entirely, ever."

"Sounds kind of like the light switch got flipped in the mommy section of your head," Chloe stated.

"I guess that's going to have to happen with me sometimes. Realizations aren't always something you work your way into. Sometimes they just hit you like a ton of bricks and your life changes because of them. Be it a light switch flipped or some other metaphor I don't want to bother thinking of, it doesn't really matter." Lois flipped Jordan over to her other hip, patting her on the back a couple times. "And I wouldn't trade what I see now for anything in the world."

Lois planted a kiss on top of Jordan's head. "So baby girl, what do you feel like doing?" Jordan looked like she was about to answer when she let forth a giant yawn and swiped at an eye tiredly. "Never mind, I think I have a good idea of what you should be doing soon." Lois yawned as well, shifting Jordan so she could rest her head on her shoulder. "It's been a long day, Almond Joy has me worn out and my little girl is starting to nod off. If you'll both excuse us, we're going to hit the sack."

Smiling, Lois turned on her heel and headed back to Jordan's room. She had her change into her pajamas and turned out the lights, settling down into the bed. "Goodnight, mommy."

Lois couldn't help the grin that overtook her and pulled Jordan close against her body, placing one last kiss for the night on her head. "Goodnight, baby girl. I love you."