ten
Killian doesn't have much in way of protective winter gear, so Mary Margaret sets him up with a pair of David's old snow pants and a thicker jacket.
Together, the entire Nolan family goes to their garage, something he hadn't realized existed until this moment, and they rummage through stacks of old boxes and David's tools until they find their impressive collection of sleds.
Killian watches on as the core members of the family argue over which one they want. Meanwhile, he and Hannah linger back awkwardly, having found a silent companionship in their status as non-relatives.
Henry's toddling around near him, so he keeps a watchful eye on the marshmallow that he's become in his snow clothes. When he tries to grab for a shovel hanging on the wall, Killian moves quickly to grab the boy.
He pulls him into his arms and grunts as he settles him onto his hip. "No, no, lad."
Henry reaches his hand out to press it against Killian's face. He bounces Henry in turn as they wait for the rest of his family to sort out the sleds.
He glances over at Hannah, who smiles at him with fondness. "Isn't he adorable? I always want to snuggle with him for hours."
Killian hums in agreement. "He'll certainly be a heartbreaker when he's older."
Hannah reaches out to touch Henry's hand. "You know, I'm told that if you're very good, and he likes you, he'll give you a nickname. But you didn't hear that from me."
He can't help the smile that finds his face. "He hasn't yet. I suppose there's still time, though."
"Okay, here's a sled for you, Killian." Charlie interrupts the moment. He settles a board down in front of him. Smiling, he looks at his nephew. "Hey, dude, what'd you get into?"
Killian laughs. "Just wanted to be like his grandfather, I'll bet. He was trying to get the shovel."
Charlie chuckles. After a second, he frowns slightly and holds out his arm. "Hey, here I'll take him from you. You don't need to hold him."
"No, it's no bother," Killian assures him. "Henry's the first baby I've ever met that I've got on with so well."
"You meet a lot of babies in fishing supply?" David asks, obviously teasing but playing it straight.
Killian goes quiet without a single word of response on his tongue. Instead, he blushes and looks down at Henry before passing him off to his uncle awkwardly.
Maybe it's the mention of what's back home, or maybe it's the look in Charlie's eye, but it's enough for him to take a mental step back to examine where he is and what he's doing.
After taking a deep breath, he clears his throat and grabs his sled from the ground. When he looks up, Emma's standing in front of him, offering him a sympathetic smile.
He wishes he didn't tell her about his secret. It's something he never shares with anyone. He isn't sure his father even knows it, and they tell each other most things.
"Alright, Nolan's, let's move out!" David announces, just in the nick of time.
Killian pivots away from Emma and tries to keep up instead with Ruth, hoping for her calming presence to bring him comfort. It doesn't fail.
"You doing okay, Killian?" she asks after they trudge through at least a yard of impossibly deep snow.
He looks over at her and laughs beneath his scarf. "I'll survive, but only just."
Ruth nods in agreement. "It's dreadfully cold, isn't it?"
They both look at the group moving ahead of them, all so eager to make it to the hill that really isn't too far into the distance.
"It's a rather steep drop off, so I don't imagine I'll want to do more than a handful of rides." Ruth admits. He looks at her in time to notice her wobbling and eagerly grabs her by the arm to help her keep balance.
"Hold on, darling," he says lightly, "we've not even arrived at the hill yet."
Ruth grips him thankfully. "You'd think my own son would care even a little to linger behind."
Sensing her playful tone, he chuckles and looks at David ahead of them. "Oi! David! What are you doing so far ahead?"
David spins around and calls back, "Clearing the path!"
"Uh huh," Killian hears Ruth mutter skeptically. He smiles to himself and helps her walk for another dozen or so feet before Emma makes her way toward them.
"Nana, did you slip on the ice back there too? Mom almost face planted."
Ruth hums. "I did, but thankfully, I was saved by this handsome hero."
Killian can feel his grin split his face in two, but he doesn't care. Emma rolls her eyes and grabs for her grandmother's sled.
"I'll take this."
"Thank you, dear."
Together, they walk toward the steep hill he's heard so much about. When they stand at the edge of it, Killian isn't let down by the impressiveness of it.
"It's practically a cliff face!"
Everyone laughs at his exclamation.
"Not quite that tall, but it is quite something." David agrees. He claps his hands together. "Alright. Are we ready?"
Rousing cheers echo in the air around him. He just laughs.
So this is what it's like to be part of a family. He's almost jealous.
/
Nana Ruth is just as good at sledding as the rumors had led him to believe.
Henry is adorable, bouncing down a gentler slope they discover nearby with excited noises coming from his throat.
Hannah and Charlie slide down the hill together, ending in a collapse that has them laughing and making snow angels in the ground that they land on.
At some point after the big race, David and Mary Margaret decide to build a snowman, which leads to the rest of the family doing the same in groups.
Ruth helps her son, something Killian finds himself watching from his spot leaning against a big tree while Emma and Henry build near him.
"Killian, you have to help us." Emma grunts as she pushes their base snowball through the snow.
Henry's on the ground, sitting in the snow, looking up at the sky above as snowflakes trickle down slowly. He's truly no help at all, but he seems to be enjoying his outing nonetheless.
Killian lifts his eyebrow. "Your handsome hero is here to save the day."
He can't see it, but he's sure she rolls her eyes. He goes to her side and helps her push her base until she seems satisfied.
"Okay," she exhales. "Two more?"
Killian nods. He allows himself to enjoy this, because he isn't sure if he'll get another day with the Nolan family, or with Emma alone. After the wedding tonight, any number of things might happen.
With Emma at his side, they both form snowballs and roll them out larger. "You know, I haven't made a snowman ever before."
"What?" Emma stops what she's doing. "You haven't made a snowman before?"
Killian stops to look at her. "That's what I said, isn't it?"
"Well, it's Henry's first, too." Emma lifts her snowball from the ground and gestures to their base. "Yours can be the middle. It's much bigger than mine."
He hoists his onto the base and then Emma follows suit. After she settles the head onto the snowman, it cracks and collapses back into the snow.
"Oh, no!" Emma cries.
Henry echoes the sentiment and stands to his feet to toddle close to her. "Oh, no, Mommy!"
Emma laughs. "Our snowman lost his head! What do we do?"
Killian drops to his knees in the snow and forms a ball in his hand before rolling it out in the snow. Henry goes to him and settles his hands on the formed snowball.
He chuckles. "Well, let's see, Henry. Help me lift it?"
Henry doesn't know what to do at first, but Killian shows him the way. He lifts the creation and grunts along with Henry.
"Oh, well done, lad."
"Good job, Henry!" Emma cheers. Her son giggles and rushes toward her, only to fall face-first into the snow. He starts crying, to no surprise, and Emma laughs. "Oh, no, kiddo. C'mere, baby."
For a moment, Killian thinks it might be time to bring Henry back inside, but as soon as Emma has him in her arms and speaks to him soothingly, he stops crying and instead extends his hand. She settles a carrot in his hand.
"Woah, Nolan!" Killian's eyes widen. "Where on Earth did that come from?"
Emma looks at him with a wry twinkle in her eyes. "I'm a magician."
"Oh," Killian replies. "I see."
Emma gives him a smile and turns her attention to the snowman, freshly fixed thanks to him. She helps Henry attach the carrot as the nose and then high-fives him.
"That looks awesome."
Killian smiles, mostly at Emma and Henry, but then at the snowman. He's become far too attached to them for his own good. "Not bad for our first snowman, hey, Henry?"
"Yeah, not bad at all." She grins. Emma kisses the side of Henry's head. "Okay, I'm freezing and I definitely have wet socks and probably more, so I think it's time to head inside. We have a wedding to get ready for too."
He hums. "I think I'll follow you in. Let me grab your sled for you. Let you have more time inside."
"Oh, you don't-" Emma hesitates. She looks back at where she'd left it and he shakes his head.
"No, it's not a trouble, love. You and Henry get back inside to the warm."
She nods once. "Okay. Thanks."
He waits for her to leave before Killian glances at the others, finding them enjoying their time together. Emma's and Henry's sleds were left over by the hill itself, whereas they'd migrated closer to the barn for snowmen building.
Killian doesn't mind the walk, especially now that a path has been cleared by their movements. After gathering the sleds, he returns the way he'd come and runs into Ruth, who smiles slightly at him as he passes David and Mary Margaret's snowman.
"You headed inside?"
"Aye," he breathes out. "Getting rather cold, and I need to get ready for the wedding."
"Oh, that's right," Ruth nods. "Well, this was fun. You almost beat me!"
Killian chuckles. "Almost, Ruth."
He'd come in second, a close second, with Charlie right beside him in third. At least, according to the unbiased judge, Mary Margaret.
The woman in question smiles at him and waves. "You should ask Emma if Graham called about the roads."
"I was actually just thinking the same thing." He nods. "You don't suppose my brother would delay his wedding a day if his best man couldn't be there, would he?"
The women shrug. "You're his only family in town. Maybe."
It gives him only some solace, because he hasn't actually told Liam he's planned on attending. Liam probably still thinks he won't show up. Mentally, he resolves that he'll check his phone as soon as he gets inside.
Killian excuses himself from the ladies and then makes his way back toward the farmhouse. He likes the way it looks surrounded by the snow, knowing how warm it is inside.
After he leaves the sleds out by the garage, he looks with eagerness to the warm home. The snow is deep where he trudges through it up onto the porch.
He kicks his boots to get the snow off of them before opening the kitchen door. Emma's and Henry's snow clothes are set out already in the entry area, giving him the cue to follow suit. He can hear Wilby's feet against the kitchen floor before he sees the dog.
Smiling, Killian tugs off his scarf and hat. "Hey, Wilby. I know, we were gone awhile, weren't we?"
Wilby's tongue hangs out while he waits patiently for Killian to strip out of his borrowed snow pants and jacket. Like Emma, he has soaking wet socks and his pants didn't quite survive without getting a dowsing either.
Set on getting upstairs to change, he leaves his boots by the door and gives Wilby an affectionate stroke before heading away from the cold emanating from the door and into the warmth of the home.
He has a permanent smile on his lips while he climbs upstairs.
Emma's watching a video or maybe she's allowing Henry to, he can hear it, and once he finds himself at the cracked door leading into their shared living quarters, he pauses, just to listen to Emma's voice.
"Yeah, I know, and I'm so sorry about that." Emma says, sighing. "But- listen-"
Curious, he peeks inside, careful because he doesn't want to interrupt her private call. Instead, what he finds is Emma, standing in a pool of light pouring out from the bathroom.
She has her hair up in a ponytail and her phone pressed against her ear, but that's not what's so surprising about the situation.
She's shirtless, wearing only her bra, turned with her right side facing him and her head down as she listens to the person on the other line.
Her skin looks soft. It's the first thing he takes notice of. The second is her mark. It's familiar in the most horrifying way.
His heart rate quickens and he feels his skin go clammy. Suddenly, the world slows, and all he can see is the intricate design, a constellation that reminds him of the Cygnus imprinted on her flesh.
She laughs, a bubbly noise, one that causes his heart to jump again.
Tears find their way forward, regrettably, and he sucks in a breath as he turns away, unable to keep looking for fear of being caught.
Instead, he hurries away from the upstairs and makes his way to the downstairs restroom. Wilby follows him, but he leaves the dog in the lurch and closes the door before he can be joined.
He flicks on the light and faces himself in the mirror. He's started shaking, his thoughts swirling, and the only thing on his mind is to strip his shirt off to see.
He turns to the right after the shirt falls to the floor and looks at the reflection. His fingers tremble where they rest, held up in the air so he can see the mark he's never wanted.
The shape starts on his ribcage and flows downward, marking wings like a bird, with one particularly special mark at the very top all alone. His shaking fingers trace the figure as he closes his eyes to envision Emma's.
His throat constricts and he meets his eyes again in the mirror.
Killian breathes out. "Bloody hell."
He grabs onto the countertop for stability and breathes in deeply a few times. A smile finds his face and he allows the tears to flow, relief suddenly swallowing him entirely.
"All that time. All that time I thought…" He stops himself, looking into his own eyes. They've become slightly red. "It's just a mark. Nothing more. Any number of people might have it."
His heart pounds against his ribcage, reminding him that he's nothing but a hopeless romantic. That since the day he lost his soulmate, he's laid idle, waiting for the right person to come around in a world filled with people who've already found their true love. That since he got to Storybrooke and met Emma Nolan, he's felt more fulfilled than he has in a very long time.
There's a pull from the very center of his being, one that aches every moment he spends apart from his match. Since Milah died, he's felt it. The past few years, it's fallen away; forgotten like a distant memory. But he feels it again. It pulls and pulls and pulls.
She's yours, his heart whispers. She's his second chance.