A/N: hey guys sorry I'm taking long with this, it's just editing that takes me long to complete things lmao...okay moving along hope you enjoy, if not I'm sorry to have disappointed ya! have fun reading ;) Oh and just so you know, all the places I'm mentioning are kind of random. I pretty much closed my eyes and pointed at a place on the map, or they probably don't exist lolz so much for creativity right lmfao anyway...enjoy!

Disclaimer: I feel like a broken record with this, but I feel everytime I write fanfiction, I have to do a disclaimer. I do NOT own anything, obviously Richelle Mead owns everthing. I'm just a fandom wannabe writer, that happens to like VA series, and can't seem to wait until Spirit Bound is out.

Chapter Ten

CHRISTIAN AND I HAD MADE IT through the hallways of guest housing without interruptions.

All of this sneaking around made me feel like a criminal, because I knew I was doing something wrong, but my intuitions about doing it for the greater good, trumped that feeling, and was tucked behind my voice of reason. Dodging guardians was something I was used to, but after the raids? The Royal Court had been under strict surveillance with guardians back to back, looking for potential threats.

Surprisingly Christian and I had made it through most of the labyrinth and we hadn't even got to the lobby yet.

In fact this reminded me a lot like when Lissa and I had escaped from the Academy, and that had almost been four years ago. But that wasn't half as bad as what we were doing now. I was about to commit felony after felony. Soon we'd have to call ourselves Thelma and Louise. I pursed my lips as I thought of how life had taken its path down crazy-ville.

Damn! How times had gone by like a speeding bullet. It felt like years were minutes where I was concerned. One blink and I'd miss it completely. I was snapped out of my reverie once I felt a shove behind me. It was Christian telling me to stop daydreaming and told me to keep going, and within seconds we were in the lobby faced with more guards.

We hid away into the shadows just as I spotted one of the guards had been Eddie. I felt a little jealousy crawl to the surface when I saw how Eddie handled himself as a guardian. He was in his formal attire, white shirt, black slacks, black jacket and coasting the area with his eyes, while the other guardian paced to and fro.

I was slightly envious of Eddie, because he got the privilege to hang with the big guys. That should be me standing there…I silently cursed myself. This wasn't the time to be selfish. In fact, I may as well kiss my future goodbye, if I keep this up. I shook my thoughts aside and kept my eye on the other guy.

I watched Eddie case the place like a professional and minutes later, he called the other guard over to him. He leaned in just enough so their conversation wouldn't be heard. A few moments passed, and the guard disappeared out of the lobby leaving Eddie by himself.

"Pssst!" Christian called him over. Eddie's head turned our way with a wary expression. We were hiding back in the shadows, behind a large plant in the corner. Eddie had been standing by the door across from us, and then he advanced on us within seconds. He knelt in front of me, still watching his back.

"Eddie, what are you doing?" I whispered. He nodded his head in greeting.

"Hey Rose, nice to know you're on board with us." I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Us? Since when was there an 'us?'" Confused couldn't even begin to cover what I was feeling.

"No time to catch up Rose, but there'll be a couple of guards that will greet you at the entrance. They've been induced by Mia, but I don't think she could hold them for too long. So you better hurry."

It took a while for all of this to register in my head. I knew how risky this all was, I mean all Moroi were capable of compulsion, but using it against people was considered a crime. A petty one, but still…and Mia and Christian? Well, they were the few people who weren't really good at it. But apparently exceeding their abilities was part of the whole façade. I looked from Eddie to Christian and then back again and frowned.

"Wait, you're all in this? Where the hell have I been?" Eddie eyed my hair with an eyebrow cocked.

"Sleeping as it seems." I scowled.

"I was pretending to be asleep." I corrected. I thought I got the knots out by tying my hair up, but obviously not. His skeptical glare never wavered.

"Right and I've been hanging with Jessica Alba all this time." I gave up; obviously this was no time to play games.

"Fine…you were saying?" Eddie, all teasing gone, turned into this serious, badass guardian. I was impressed. I mean I knew he was a good guardian, but seeing him in action? Well, let's just say I was glad to call him a friend of mine.

"If you go through that way, you'll come out on the west wing, take a right, then two lefts, and you'll see Mia. The guards will let you out, and the car will be waiting a mile up the road." He pointed out exits and all the hot spots where the guardians were expected to be, and places where it was easier to avoid them. Eddie was a strategic guy I noticed, and a damn good guardian.

"Where exactly are we going? And a wheel man? We have one of those?" I countered. Eddie nodded.

"You'd be surprised, Rose." Wasn't that the understatement of the year, I was beyond surprised.

"Um…yeah, surprised couldn't even begin to cover it." I admitted. I wondered how in the world they could have done this in less than forty eight hours. Yeah, Adrian had connections, and in all the right places as I had noticed, but I wasn't expecting it to work in my favor. Eddie gave a side-long glance.

"Well, word was out you needed to commit a felony, involving Victor Dashkov. Adrian managed to snatch up his records, so here take these and go!" He stuffed a scroll full of papers in my hand and I curled my fingers around it.

"Okay, somebody wake me up when this is over, because obviously I'm dreaming." Christian beamed a smile.

"Told you she's been secretly fantasizing about me, but I'm sorry to say, I'm off the market." Eddie smirked and nodded in my direction.

"That makes two of us." I scoffed and shook my head.

"Boys!" I muttered to myself.

"Now get outta here, before I change my mind." Eddie said and ushered us out the door.

"Yessir!" I said under my breath and gave him a quick nod in 'thanks'; he returned it by patting me on the shoulder as the big brother he always was to me. We took the directions he pointed out, leaving him in the lobby and made our way to the entrance.

As soon we got there, my heart decided to take on a running marathon, as I stared across the way at the entrance. I was slightly wary when I saw how the two guards stood there like they were about to arrest us for something. One guy looked like I could take on easily, the other? Not so much. His burly frame made me think of a body builder, or wrestler. Though I had been trained to take on opponents twice my size, something about his, made me uneasy. But if it came down to it? I'd be forced to play dirty. My nerves calmed a little just as we spotted Mia, and took up station next to her. Mia hurried us to them and surprisingly the guards nodded in a form of greeting as if they were expecting us, and the gates were opened.

The guards looked like they didn't have a clue what they were doing, as if their bodies were acting out for themselves. Mia voiced a quick 'good luck' and scurried away while the guardians went back to "guarding" as the gates closed up.

We were out side the gates and walking a mile up the road a few moments later and it finally dawned on me, that this just seemed all so surreal. Now I was going to add 'fugitive' to my records. God, I was getting deeper in shit that I intended. Looking on the Brightside? I was free, well figuratively speaking. But I refused to get my hopes up just yet, it was still early.

I looked up at the sky as if somewhere up in the stars could tell me what time it was. It had to be at least a few hours before sunrise, so walking on a straight narrow road like this one made my guardian instincts come out to play.

Right now, everyone had been on curfew. We lived on a nocturnal schedule in Montana, at the Academy, but here at the court, everyone had to be in there dorms just until they sorted out what went wrong. That's why it was reasonably hard to get out of guest housing. The guards had been monitoring it closely. Out of strict luck had we been able to escape from there without getting caught.

I looked around to study my surroundings. It was quiet around this time, save for the sleepless creatures that occupied the area. Even the sound of our boots sticking in the ground was more dominant with all the eerie silence that fanned between us. The road was lightly dusted with snow, but it wasn't as much as the hills had, just enough to feel the cold in the air.

I had to hand it to Christian. He was a tough guy, and there wouldn't be any other person that I'd rather have here with me than him. We made one hell of a team when we were together, and if a Strigoi happened to jump out of no where? Well, with his fire magic and my Strigoi instincts. Let's just say, they'll be toast. Literally.

We came up to an intersection and halted at the signs: West pointed toward Ohio; East pointed to New York and South pointed toward West Virginia. I was silently hoping they had a sign for Lost, because that's what we were. A rustling sounded from the bushes a few feet away behind us and I crouched down gesturing to Christian to stay back. I didn't have my signature nausea when Strigoi were near so I knew it wasn't going to be a threat, but that didn't mean I would let my guard down.

I put my hand on my stake, gripping it firmly so I had it out in the ready. Christian looked at me as his eyes gave me a look like he was about to pull his fire magic out. I shook my head and put my index finger over my mouth for him to be quiet. I looked back to the rustling and gingerly crept closer. I furrowed my eyebrows when a red car came into view, and a familiar girl stepped out from her hiding place. My eyes brightened and I straightened up in recognition.

"Sydney? What the…" She gave a quick wave.

"Hey Rose!" She eyed the stake that was in my hand carefully and her smile disappeared abruptly. "—I hope you weren't planning on using that thing on me." Her hands went up in protective mode. I shook my head.

"Ahh…no, I thought you were. Never mind." I said and shook my thoughts off to focus on her. She stopped to lean on the bonnet of her car, or what she called 'the hurricane' and crossed her arms over her chest. It was parked a little off the road, just enough so it could be covered by shrubbery.

She had a long teal checkered coat on, with white slacks and loafers, as she waited. I slipped my stake back in my belt.

"You're the wheel man?" I noted. She nodded with a tight wary smile, and tightened her grip around the crucifix that hung from her neck. She was more wary about Christian standing beside me.

"Wheel girl, as it seems," said Christian then leaned in to my ear so I could only hear. "A human?" Christian pointed out. I nodded and rolled my eyes, as if that wasn't obvious.

"Oh yeah, Sydney? Meet Christian. Christian, Sydney. Don't worry about him, he's harmless."

She didn't seem to take that into account. According to Sydney, all vampires within a miles radius she considered harmful, and took with great precaution. She was after all a religious bigot, and fallen into the line of Alchemy; which were humans who are sworn to secrecy and prevent our vampire race from being discovered. They also have a few tricks at disposing Strigoi corpses with a little fairy dust, if you will. I'd learned beforehand when I left a few dead bodies of my own in Novosibirsk. But she was a friend of mine, and I wondered how in the hell she ended up in the midst of all this.

"How… when?" I was this close to stuttering, with the amount of questions I wanted to ask.

"I got a call that you needed my help!" She stated at last.

"You did? Man I wish I got that call. Save me from all this confusion." She rolled her eyes.

"Figures, jump in." She nodded to the hurricane. I eyed the thing with a smile. Her one prized possession she was proud of. She leaned in the passenger's side window and held a long black jacket. I wasn't one for materialistic idolization, but with Lissa's royal status, and her designer fetish, she had clued me in on designers, and by the look of it? Even I wasn't as ignorant to know that wasn't a knock off. And that was definitely Valentino printed all over that jacket. She handed it over to me.

"You're gonna need this." She said and my eyes stained the garment like a kid with their first candy. I retrieved the jacket and let my fingers roam over the collar. The pure cashmere felt inviting under my touch and the pricey look on it made me think twice about wearing the thing. It looked like a thick long blazer with a tie up. Sydney looked at Christian apologetically. "Sorry, I kind of got the impression that she was coming alone." He shrugged.

"Yeah, thanks, but I'm a big boy, I can take care of a little cold." I shrugged the jacket on and it fit perfectly. I slid in the passenger's side, while Christian occupied the back seat. Sydney went to work with the key, and the car wheezed on the first few tries. Seconds later, the car kicked in with a vroom and the blinkers set off to the left; which pointed toward the west. Feeling like a fugitive already, my nerves settled as The Royal Court disappeared in the rearview.

"So where are we off to, anyway?" Okay, the big sign that read Pittsburgh screamed 'obvious' but the why? Not so much.

"North Dakota." I pegged her with a skeptical stare. We were miles away from North Dakota. In fact, had I known that? I would've stayed at the Academy, seeming how that was closer to it than here in Pennsylvania where the Royal Court was.

"Please tell me we're not driving all that way. That's like over two hundred miles to cover…" She shook her head.

"No, I don't think the hurricane can make it that far anyway." Christian, at the mention of the 'hurricane' seemed amused as he eyed the thing with interest.

"There's a gas station a few miles up from here, and a diner. I figured you'd like to stop in for a coffee before we go any further. Our flight is scheduled for 4.30am in Pittsburgh, so I hope you brought a passport." Sydney looked at me expectantly, then back on the road, and then added, "please say you have your passport…"

I furrowed my eyebrows and started searching in my duffel bag. Shit! Passport, where the hell was mine? As if reading my mind, Christian waved two small booklets in the air.

"You mean these things?" He smiled. I sighed in relief and snatched mine off him.

"Rose, Rose, Rose…what will you do without me eh…?" Christian shook his head in mocking pride. I groaned.

"Coffee sounds goood," I said and let my head fall back on the head rest. Abruptly, I turned to look at Sydney.

"Tell me…exactly who is in North Dakota?" Sydney furrowed her eyebrows as if annoyed at how little I knew of this road trip.

"Read the papers Rose. It might do you some good." Christian answered me instead. I dug into my duffel bag and fished out the papers Eddie had handed to me. I rolled the three pages of documents out and brushed my palms over to straighten them out. They were Victors transferring documents, all signed by Tatiana. I let my eyes skim over it and then I furrowed my eyebrows.

"St. Bismarck, State Penitentiary; North Dakota…since when did they have a Moroi prison there?" Sydney shrugged.

"It used to be the old Minot Air Force Base, up until the local council ordered to get rid of it. Demolition was appointed, but bought controversy about creating an avalanche, being so close to the mountains and all, so they just left it. Abandoned and everything. Moroi bought the section centuries ago and turned it into a private owned prison. I'm surprised you don't know this already. Don't you pay attention in history?"

Obviously not. I was only aware of the current Minot Air Force Base that they had up now, and that was in Ward Country, not in Bismarck. I went back to reading the rest of the papers. It had dates in which he was transferred, names that had him escorted, even his inmate number which by the way should have been 666 for all I cared, and a whole lot of irrelevant nonsense that filled the pages. I skipped a few lines until something caught my eye.

"Wait, it says here that Victor requested to be transferred to North Dakota? Why the hell would anyone want to be in a particular prison by choice?" I looked to Sydney hoping she would have the answer I needed, but she looked as clueless as I was.

"I honestly don't know." Sydney was slightly disappointed at her lack of help, but she shrugged it off and focused back on the road. Christian decided to voice his opinion.

"Heaps of reasons." I shifted my gaze on him. He was slouched on the back seat, with his long legs spread to each side in order to compensate for the lack of room the car had. I raised my eyebrows surprised at his commentary.

"Oh yeah? Like what?" I challenged. He shrugged, giving his lower lip a little pout. Christian was reasonably tall, well all Moroi were, but he made the back look like a toddler's seat. He practically took up the whole back seat with his frame.

"Well, being closer to a loved one would do it for me. If I was in prison for something…bad or whatever, I'd definitely want to be as closer to Lissa as I could." I twisted my head toward Christian so I could look at him properly. He seemed wary at my expression.

"What? Why are you looking at me like that? Oh right! Don't worry. You'll probably be in the cell next to me, preferably waving a mirror at me complaining about how you didn't get enough food." I had to laugh at that one. Christian and I had been through a lot together, and cell mates? Well, we were one step closer from heading in that direction. I smiled down right stupidly.

"Christian, I think you just made the top list of being my favorite person in the world. I could kiss you right now." He scowled.

"Please don't, I just ate." I kissed the papers instead.

"You know how many hands have touched that?" Sydney's disapproving voice cut in. I rolled my eyes and ignored that for a second.

"Do you know what this means?" My eyes brightened with glee.

"You'll get ink on your teeth?" Christian teased.

"No…that Victor obviously wanted to be closer to a loved one...and since the only existing immediate family member is his half brother, maybe that's who he wanted to be closer to."

"He has a half brother?" Christian asked curiously. I nodded.

"Yeah, his names Robert Duro. A spirit user too…but he's got a few loose screws in his head, or so I was told."

"How you figure we're going to get through to him then? Or better yet, to him?" He asked. I shrugged.

"You know what? I haven't a clue, but at least this will tell us that we don't necessarily have to commit a felony to get answers if you know what I mean." Christian didn't seem too pleased about something.

"And exactly how does this all relate to saving Lissa and Adrian?" I sighed.

"Good question. I haven't thought that far ahead, but I'm getting there. Right now, we get this taken care of, and then we'll take care of them."

I let my head fall back into the chair and settled comfortably. The car fell silent and the static sound of the radio droned on to a classic rock song. Snow covered the side hills, and trees, while the hypnotic hum of the car made my eyes feel sleepy.

In an hour or so, dawn will sheer its light, and maybe so would a miracle. I wasn't aware of it, but I was automatically shoved into Lissa's head.

That only happened once or twice when I was asleep, and subconsciously I'll accidently get pulled into her head while her and Christian were having sex. And that hadn't been pretty at all. I ended up getting a show I most certainly hadn't been invited to.

This time, her emotions were mixed with the same feeling you tend to have when having sex, yet she wasn't. Then I realized it was endorphins from a bite. I happened to be lying down somewhere in a dark place. No, it was my eyes twitching to open, but the drowsy feeling I got when I tried to open them, made me shut them instantly.

My eyelids felt like heavy bricks. I shuffled around to get comfortable, but my back felt like it was on a pile of concrete. I heard clinking sounds in the background and my head turned toward the sound of its echo. I furrowed my eyebrows. Faint sounds of cars and horns sounded above me, but not as loud as if I could be near them. I had to be underground. Somewhere.

I urged Lissa to open her eyes as if they were my own. She groaned and surprisingly I managed to peel her eyes open. Instant blur clouded my vision. I could only make out shapes and shadows moving past, but nothing too clear. It was worse than a camera being out of focus. I felt the urge to rub my eyes, but my hands felt restrained. I wish I had some kind of way so I could communicate with her, or some way she would know I was with her. I sensed her discomfort and I almost felt sick to my stomach that Lissa was going through all of this. I felt so helpless. I blinked again when I felt someone near my vision.

"Wakey wakey, sleepy head." I froze as if he were talking to me. I knew that voice anywhere as if it was permanently stained in my mind. His Russian accent was a little distant, but I think it was my hearing doing the damage. My heart started hammering in my chest. Almost like I forgot I was in Lissa's head and I was trapped in there myself.

It was like reliving the nightmare at Galina's estate, back when Dimitri had captured me in Russia. This time Lissa was going through it. A tinge of hatred roiled over me. Dimitri had stooped low, and I silently cussed him out as if he could hear me. Lissa groaned again and blinked her eyes furiously to get a good look at her captor. I saw his fangs through my vision and his red Strigoi eyes. His face was out in full view, no black mask, letting his hair hit the side of his face freely, but his features were still a blatant blur. I noticed how his hair seemed longer out. Almost past his shoulders. I shouldn't have taken that into account but I couldn't help it.

He brushed her hair out of the way of her face like he was nurturing her, then lifted her head up and placed a thermal to her mouth. I tasted copper on my tongue as if I was drinking it, and I realized he was giving her blood. Lissa refused to open her mouth further, however and managed to hit it away with her jaw. I hadn't known Lissa to be stubborn at all, but maybe I had rubbed off on her a little. Maybe that was a good thing, because there was no knowing what kind of blood he was giving her.

For all we know, it could be his. And that was one of the ways Strigoi could turn their victims into one of them, and feeding his blood would complete that process, but somehow I doubted that that was his intentions. Especially how careful he seemed with me—her.

His caresses weren't the same as he once used on me, but still his touch made all my senses come alight. As if he meant to be touching me. Maybe he didn't intend on hurting her at all, and maybe she was just a pawn just to get to what he really wants; which was me. Refusing to drink only made him angry, but he didn't act out on it.

A shadow passed and it seemed like he was walking away. I now realized why Lissa's fatigue had taken a toll on her, she hadn't been feeding enough. Which made me rethink of how stubborn she aught to be, and take the stuff that was offered to her. I wondered just how long she could handle without it, but the drug she was on wasn't helping either. I tried to tune into what he was saying as he turned his back. One thing I didn't expect to still have this feeling that I still had for him. Even in his state, I couldn't deny that I loved him. I was still in love with him.

"What did you say?" He whipped his head in my direction. Okay, I'm pretty sure I didn't say that out aloud. And being in Lissa's mind? I was sure of it. He advanced on Lissa, and knelt down in front of her with both of his hands on her face.

"What did you say?" He repeated. I had a feeling he was looking in my eyes, not Lissa's. All she was capable of was slurring words. He slightly shook her to snap her out of her dazed state. I felt as if he were shaking me awake instead.

"…still…in love with…him." Wait, did I just hear Lissa slur those exact words that I was thinking?

"With who?" He urged her to keep going. This was starting to really creep me out. This was not happening. I mean, for one: Lissa and I only shared a one way bond with each other, which meant I can hear her thoughts, feelings and what not, but vice versa? That had never been heard of, and I was sure of it. In fact, only Oksana was capable of something like that. She was able to brush through peoples minds. Strigoi were capable of a lot of things too, but I was pretty sure 'reading minds' wasn't one of them. But that still didn't explain why Lissa was saying what I was currently thinking? I wondered if I should test this theory. Lissa can you hear me?

No answer. Lissa, it's Rose, are you okay?

No answer. Okay, so that wasn't going anywhere…maybe it was just her subconscious saying something that I happened to be thinking.

"Rose…?" I heard Lissa choke my name out of her mouth. I met my eyes with Dimitri's. My vision was clearing a bit, but not enough that I could make out his features, or surroundings. Lissa. I'm here with you, don't worry I'm a get you outta there okay? Lissa nodded and I blanched all over. Did she just answer me? I watched Dimitri cock his head to the side and study me. And then he smiled.

"You're with her aren't you? You're in her mind?" Dimitri asked, but it was more like a curious statement as if he already knew the answer. Something at the back of my mind knew that he wasn't talking to Lissa anymore. He was talking to me. I swear it was like his eyes could see right through my soul. Dimitri didn't possess any godlike powers other than the speed and strength you get along with being Strigoi, well if you count immortality to be godlike, and he also had some form of compulsion he could use, but his intuitions were always right. Even as a Dhampir he saw right through me. He hovered over my face and ran his thumb absently over my cheeks.

"My Roza…? I was wondering when you were going to show." His mouth twitched up in a smirk. I glared in my own skin, but Lissa's groaning took on a new tenor. She was struggling a little under his touch, but he forced her to settle.

"—you're quite predictable to be honest, but I knew you'd try to look for her on your own, without involving any authority. I guess I knew that much." How did he know I wouldn't have involved authority?

"I suppose, I should've let Kirova suspend you on her own terms, but after all, she's quite a susceptible clientele. Given her age, I wouldn't be surprised." He chuckled abruptly. "I may have to reward the Zeklos boy for helping though. He was quite happy to avenge his honor from dobbing you in." he added thoughtfully.

Lissa snap out of it. I silently pleaded. Dimitri carried on with his commentary. "Just as well I was one step ahead of you, and able to delay your chances. Don't worry; I always had faith that you'd get out of there without interruptions. As I said, I have connections among the guardians, and some are loyal than others." He let his mouth hover by my ear making me shiver from the hot feel of his breath.

"I'll see you soon Rose, make sure you come alone, or Ivashkov might have to pay for it." He whispered in my ear. I was startled by the hand on my shoulder and I slipped out of her head. I blinked furiously and jerked my head from side to side. My head felt like I was drenched in moisture and then I noticed Christian. And then Sydney. And my heart took a while to slow back to its normal pace. I thought I'd never say it, but I was glad to see Christian's face in my line of sight. Man, this was the first time I felt uneasy going into Lissa's mind. That was like a nightmare. I wondered if I had dreamed it all, but somehow I doubted that.

"Why were you screaming?" Christian asked. I furrowed my brows. Was that me? I shook my head.

"I don't know." I admitted. I was still trying to shake that unnerving feeling I had with being in Lissa's head.

"You said something about Lissa, is she okay?" I raised my eyebrows, noting how Christian had guessed I had been with her and not sleeping. That meant that wasn't a nightmare, it was reality.

"No, he's got her drugged on something, so it's hard to tell where I am when I'm with her. I think he's thought this through. He knows of our bond, so he's keeping her on some type of drug." Though I hadn't expected him to know I was in her mind, still, that was freakishly weird. As for the drug? That was obviously endorphins from his bite, I had experience beforehand, but there was something stronger. I mean, I know how a Strigoi bite could be ten times stronger than any Moroi bite, but I had a feeling that he had her on something on top of that…like some kind of date rape drug. I couldn't explain the feeling.

I wanted to say something, anything about what I just had experienced, but my mouth refused to voice it out aloud. That, and I couldn't bring myself to tell Christian what Lissa was going through just yet. He'd only worry his self into an early grave.

"Should've killed him when you had the chance." He muttered to himself.

I winced but he didn't seem to notice, or at least it's what I hoped for. Christian knew the basics about the relationship I had with Dimitri, only through Lissa's half truths, and he wasn't the prying type to get in my head to ask what was going on with me, but he was aware of how serious it had been. Only because he dealt with the aftermath of my depressed state I was supposedly in. He cleared his throat to fill the void of silence.

"Oh shit, yeah sorry I…" He apologized as if he felt the need to. I shook my head and cut him off.

"No, actually you're right. I know exactly how you feel." I admitted.

Well, at least now I do. I found myself thinking the same thing. If I had completed my blunder, maybe Lissa wouldn't be in this mess. As for me? I couldn't say my life would have been anything if Dimitri hadn't come into it. Maybe this was the time I had to let go of the fact that Dimitri was no longer the Dimitri I had fallen in love with, and that he was after all a twisted monster. I had to let go of the fact that my happy ending was never coming, and come to terms with the cards that I had been dealt with.

There was no happy ending that was foreseeable in the near future for me, but at least I could do something for someone else's fairy tale. I had to get Lissa back, and Adrian I wanted back. Dimitri, though I loved him, was gone the minute that blonde Strigoi came into my life and destroyed every chance of me having a happily ever after.

Yeah, there was a small possibility that this theory could work its magic. But I can't guarantee that he'll be the same person afterwards. A sacrifice definitely comes with its own victory, and even if that victory wasn't meant for me. I can accept that. What I didn't get was why?

I guess that was part of life's mysteries, you either learn from it or revel in all its luxuries. I was meshed somewhere in between.