Welcome back again folks. Sorry it's been a while. RL has been all over the place.
This week's chapter is dedicated to the lovely quietruby and to my eldest son, who both had birthday celebrations at the weekend.
Now I've kept you waiting long enough, let's get back down to business. Some of you have been asking questions about our dear Edward, hopefully this should answer some of them.
Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, it belongs to S. Meyer. I'm just playing with her toys for a while. This storyline is still mine though, so please no playing with it without my permission.
Chapter 9 Give Me Your Hand
While I sit on the bed, and wait for Edward to return, my euphoria slowly wears off. I feel more than a little uncomfortable. What just happened was phenomenal, but I really don't know what to do with myself. Deciding I can't sit here freaking out forever, I get up from the bed and pace the floor. The water is still running in Edward's bathroom. He must be taking a shower.
Remembering that there was more than one bathroom, I head to the spare to freshen up. Unfortunately it looks like it has not been used yet – there are no towels or other supplies evident. Phew, at least there's some toilet paper. I freshen up as best I can and then wander back to the kitchen, for want of something better to do. I open a few cupboards. Hmm, Edward hasn't really stocked this place yet. There are tea bags so I put the kettle on. A quick check of the fridge reveals some milk. That's promising. I set about making two cups of tea then realise I've forgotten how Edward takes his. I had better go ask him.
Wandering back into the bedroom, I stop in my tracks. The bathroom door is ajar and Edward is wandering through it. And oh my! Edward is semi naked, clad only in a towel. He has the towel around his hips and is rubbing his hair with another. My knees almost give way. He's simply staggering. Still wet from his impromptu shower, rivulets of water trickle down Edward's torso. I can't take my eyes off them. I want to lick them. Edward chuckles.
"My eyes are up here, Bella."
I look up and the smug bastard is smirking at me. I flush red as a tomato. In fact it feels like I am blushing from head to toe. Frozen in position, I need to snap myself out of this and say something.
"I was making tea," I manage to stammer out. "How do you take it again?"
"White, no sugar thanks." Edward smiles warmly. "I'll just..." He gestures to his belongings.
I leave him to get dressed before I get any funny ideas, like accidentally on purpose unravelling his towel. I go back to the kitchen and finish making the tea. By the time it's ready, Edward has returned. He's dressed in fresh jeans and a dark polo shirt. He looks just as jump-able. He takes his tea from me with a smile and gestures towards the sofa. We sit, side by side, sipping our tea.
"Are you okay?" he asks, as he gently strokes my cheek. "You seem a little on edge."
Suddenly I am biting back tears. Where did they come from? I try and force them back. I can't cry now, I just can't. Unfortunately, Edward notices immediately.
"Hey," he murmurs and pulls me into his arms. "What's wrong?"
His arms tighten around me. I feel the warmth of his body. The comfort he is providing makes all my tension disappear. Looking up, I find he is gazing at me, eyes warm and full of compassion. He leans down and gently strokes my nose with his.
"Okay now?" he asks, with a warm smile.
"Yes," I reply, finding myself smiling back at him. "I just had a bit of a moment, sorry."
"You never have to apologise to me, Bella," Edward says, mock-sternly. "If anyone is apologising it really should be me. I didn't take advantage of you, did I? You seemed to be fine with everything at the time." Now his expression has changed to one of concern.
"I'm fine," I insist.
Once I've said it, I realise that I am. Although this was a huge step for me, now that I am sitting here in Edward's arms, everything feels just right. Like our own personal bubble. I don't want to leave. I feel Edward's arms tighten, as he pulls me into him for a cuddle. I rest my cheek against his chest. He gently strokes my hair for a while as we snuggle. He gently tilts my chin upwards so I look at him. His eyes are warm, but still full of questions.
"I could sit like this forever," he muses, "but we really should talk more about this." He strokes my face again.
"I hadn't even thought about doing anything that forward with you yet. But I don't regret it, truly I don't. I just wanted you to know that."
"I didn't mean for things to happen so fast," I stammer out, trying to keep another blush at bay. "I just couldn't help myself, and then things kind of..." I let my head droop, suddenly the pattern on the leg of my jeans is extremely interesting.
"Oh no, you don't, Bella," A firm hand grasps my chin and pulls so I am forced to look at him. "Don't hide from me, please," he pleads.
"I'm..." before I can get another word out, Edward pushes his finger to my lips.
"No apologizing, remember," he chides.
"Okay," I reply. "I just meant to say it's been a while since I was this intimate with anyone, and it takes some getting used to."
"How long is a while?" Edward looks intrigued. Oh hell. This is embarrassing. Time for Bella to admit that she's a big fat loser in the world of relationships. I take a deep breath and brace myself.
"Depends on what you're asking. The last time I had a boyfriend, or the last time I ..." My voice tails off.
"I don't want to pry," Edward frowns, not happy with the discomfort that must be showing in my body language. "Just tell me whatever you are comfortable with. You don't have to tell me anything, if you don't want to."
I should. He really needs to know.
"Well I haven't been in a relationship for over two years now, and I haven't been, um, intimate with anyone for about the same." There. It's out.
"Really?" Edward looks surprised. "Why? I cannot imagine you ever being short of admirers." He looks genuinely perplexed. I shrug.
"I don't really go looking. I have a lot of friends, well acquaintances, but I've never been one for the bar crawls. Not like my ex housemates enjoy doing. They tried to drag me out, but they would always end up finding men then I'd be stuck on my own, or worse." I shudder.
"No boyfriends, at all?" Edward still seems incredulous.
"Well I did go on a blind date a while back," I admit. "But it didn't go well." Didn't go well is an understatement. I hope I can get away without having to tell the whole story. I decide to try and change the subject, and with a sudden rush of courage ask him, "What about you?"
There is a brief, awkward silence.
"Well," Edward pauses. "There really isn't that much to tell." Now he looks awkward. "I haven't really had a long term relationship before." Now I am the one who is stunned. This can't be possible. How on earth could this be true?
"Never?" I blurt out, still in shock. Then clamp a hand over my mouth, astonished at my own boldness. Luckily Edward doesn't seem offended. He takes my hand and gives it a reassuring squeeze.
"Well it never really happened for me. Sure there have been girls, but no one ever really caught my attention. I've been on dates, but nothing serious." This cannot be true, can it?
"So what's the longest relationship you've ever been in?" Oh great. Nosey Bella seems to have taken over me.
"Well, I dated this girl for a few months, maybe six at the most. She wanted more than I could give so I broke it off." Edward shrugs. "That was about a year ago. Since then I've had a couple of casual dates. That's about it."
I am astonished. There must be something wrong with him! Maybe he's a commitment-phobe. I have to try and do some deeper delving. I try to summon some more courage from somewhere.
"What about before?" I ask.
"When I was younger? Well to be honest I was a real geek in school. I devoted a lot of time to my studies, the same when I was at university. I never really had time for a girlfriend. After I left, well I never really settled anywhere for long. I went travelling for a while, then came home. Like I said, I never met anyone that special before. Just flings. Until now."
He squeezes my hand again and I glance up at him. His eyes are burning with intensity. Hold on a minute, until now? Is he saying what I think he's saying?
"Why me?" I blurt out. I can't understand why he finds me so fascinating. I am just plain old Bella Swan, who gave up on the dating game, just trundling through life.
"Well," he cups my chin with one hand, and strokes my face with the other. "Where do I start? I've never met anyone like you before Bella. You captivate me."
"W-why," I stammer. I can't get my head around this. Why on earth would this gorgeous man, who has never been interested in any woman before, suddenly want me?
"Well, it's hard to put into words. I was fascinated ever since you woke me up with those colourful curse words in Jasper's office." I flush, remembering.
"Yeah, sorry about that," I mutter. Edward grabs my chin.
"I said no more apologizing. Hmm, I think you owe me a forfeit for that." His eyes twinkle.
Before I can catch a breath his grip on me tightens and he pulls me closer. I had been perching on the edge of his lap but not anymore. Oh boy. Now he's close. Really close. Look away from the Tractor Beam, Bella.
"Now, what shall I collect? I know. As you won't stop saying sorry, how about I make sure you can't?"
With an evil grin he dips his head and presses his lips to mine. He kisses me hard. I am stunned by the ferocity of his approach but yield to him instantly. His tongue strokes mine and his hands caress my back. I can't believe we're here again. I return his kisses, threading my fingers through his hair. Edward groans and pulls me even closer. I feel his fingers slide up under my top again, stroking my bare skin. This is dangerous. If I'm not careful we'll be heading straight back to the bedroom. And who knows what will happen this time?
Edward's mouth moves to my ear, which he sucks on, then down my neck. He's gentle, no chance of any offending marks this time. He kisses his way down to my collar bone. I feel the gentle brush of his tongue against my skin. I also feel something very hard beneath me. Again? No way! I tremble as he makes a wet trail back to my mouth. He kisses me again, softly this time, slows, and stops. Then strokes my nose with his.
"See, it worked, didn't it?" He is smirking at me now. Oh hell. It looks like he now has another weapon at his disposal. And doesn't he know it.
I say nothing for a few moments, looking down into my lap, trying to calm myself.
Edward grabs my chin and pulls my face back to his. "Hey, you okay? I was only teasing." His face is contrite now.
"I'm okay," I gaze into warm green. "Really, I am."
"So where were we?" I have no idea. I pause for a second, hoping Edward will prompt me.
I glance at my watch. Holy hell. How did it get to four in the afternoon? Edward notices my not-so-subtle-as-I-thought time check.
"I didn't realise the time. Do you need to get back?"
Much as I'd like to stay, I really do need to get home and prepare for the week.
"I really should," I admit, although I don't want to. What I really want is to stay here with Edward in our own little bubble, and forget everything else in the world.
He takes my hand and we get up slowly. I rinse the mugs in the sink, despite Edward insisting I don't need to. The need to tidy up after myself is ingrained in me. He walks me to the car, yet again insisting on opening my door for me. I climb in and we set off.
Edward is quiet on the drive home. He doesn't let go of my hand for the whole journey. Even when he needs to do something while driving he just does it while holding my hand. His hand feels so warm. I don't want to let go. I look out of the window as we head out of town, towards the countryside. Town streets give way to green fields as we draw closer to my home. I feel a mild sense of panic at the thought of saying goodbye to him. It's been such a lovely day and I have no idea when I will see him again.
We pull up outside my house. Edward switches off the engine and gets out. That's a good sign. It looks like he's not going straight away. I have a least a few more moments with him. He takes my hand and walks me to my door. Unfortunately I have to let go of him while I fish for my key, which he takes from me and insists on opening the door himself. All I can do is stand and watch. We've been here before. This time I'm not going to ask. If he turns me down again, I'll feel so rejected. So there's an awkward silence. I shuffle my feet nervously and prepare to just walk through the door and see if he follows me.
"Bella," I look up from my feet and Edward is standing in the doorway, smiling warmly.
"May I come in?" Oh thank heavens, he's asked. Now I don't have to. Suddenly I have a goofy grin on my face.
"Of course," I respond and lead the way. Edward follows as I walk through to the kitchen. I gesture towards the kettle "Tea?" He agrees and I make the tea while he stands in my kitchen, eagerly surveying his surroundings. I love my kitchen, it gets a lot of sun and I like to sit at the small table and work. Soon the tea is made and we wander through to my cosy lounge. Edward settles on the sofa and instantly opens his arms for me. I accept the invitation and we snuggle happily for a moment or two. Then he shifts slightly, so he's facing me. He takes my hand, and rests it on his knee, covering it with his own.
"So what are your plans this week?" He asks, stroking my knuckles softly.
"I haven't got much pencilled in," I say, mentally running through my diary. "Oh, I need to go into Jasper's office on Wednesday to run the payroll." As soon as the words leave my mouth, I wonder if I've made a faux pas. Of course it's now Edward's company too. Hmm, he's not said anything so hopefully he doesn't mind.
"That's good," he's smiling. "I'm in on Wednesday so maybe we can go to lunch? And I'd still like to have that dinner too. Actually if you're finished early we can take off and spend the afternoon and evening together?" Oh bless him. He is so animated and excited - eyes alight with boyish excitement. I can't resist him when he looks at me like this.
"Okay," I agree, smiling back at him. "That would be lovely." I seem to be getting better at this. Must be the "Edward effect". Usually when a man asks me out I turn into a blushing, stammering, backing away mess.
We finish our tea, holding hands and sharing idle bits of chit chat. Every so often I catch Edward's eye and he slips me a tiny smile. Sadly, all too soon, he stands. I realise our little bubble is about to break. He pulls me to my feet - a little too hard. As I stumble, he catches me and I end up very, very close to him. Nose to nose. His hands reach around my waist and he pulls me into an embrace. I lean against his chest, content. I gaze up at him, almost unable to believe my eyes. This gorgeous man is holding on to me like he never wants to let go. I blink furiously and almost pinch myself.
"What are you thinking?" Edward interrupts my daydreaming. "You have the most curious expression on your face." He touches my cheek, and strokes softly.
"I was wondering if you're real." Damn. My inner brain to mouth filter seems to be broken. Now I really have made an idiot of myself.
"Real?" Edward smirks at me, trying to keep a straight face and failing miserably. "Of course I'm real. I told you that before, remember?" He shakes his head, slowly. "Oh Bella, Bella, what am I going to have to do to convince you?"
Before that last statement can sink in his lips are on mine, hungry, demanding. His hands grab me and pull me closer to him. I find myself returning his kiss with equal passion and our mouths duel furiously. Soon we are both panting. Edward turns us so his back is to the sofa and he sits back down. He pulls, and I am straddling him. He breaks the kiss, and tilts my head back for access to my neck. Soon his mouth and tongue are working their magic and I am gasping for air. I grab his hair and pull. I can't help myself. I know he likes it and I love the feeling of his silky hair under my fingertips. He grunts. It's the sexiest sound ever. I do it again. This time he moans into my neck.
"Oh God, Bella, what you do to me..."
Now his hands are everywhere, roaming under my clothes. I give in. I can't stop him. I don't know what I want but I know I don't want him to stop. He kisses his way back to my lips and his tongue meets mine again. I moan into his mouth. This spurs him on even more. His hands move to my breasts and they squeeze. I gasp. He does it again. Then he reaches around to my back and unhooks my bra. His eyes meet mine, asking permission. I give a tiny nod. I want him. That's all it takes.
He lifts my top off over my head and drops it on the floor, together with my bra. I am semi naked, sitting on his lap. His head instantly dips between my breasts and he starts peppering them with kisses. He takes them in his hand and squeezes, before moving in and taking a nipple in his mouth. He sucks and licks, his tongue flicking my now rock hard nipple. I can't help it. I groan and gasp. He carries on. I can feel his hardness beneath me, and I grind on him shamelessly. What on earth has possessed me? I've never, never done that before. Oh, but it feels so good. The friction just where I want it, just like before. Are we going to do that again?
Edward is still kneading, sucking and kissing my breasts. He shows no sign of stopping. I throw my head back and lose myself in the sensation. Then I shamelessly grind on him again. I can't help it. I want more. This time when I do it he lets go of my boobs and grabs my hips. Uh oh, maybe I went too far?
He grabs me tightly and pulls me closer then thrusts upwards against me. Yes, he wants more all right. I feel unsure all of a sudden. I don't know how to drive this. I'm on top of him and I don't know what to do next. I freeze. Luckily Edward seems to realise I need some help.
He murmurs in my ear, "Bella, stand up gorgeous girl."
I comply, slowly, as my legs are a little shaky. He stands with me, supporting me.
Then he growls into my ear, his voice all rough and husky, "Do you want to go upstairs?"
I pause for a moment. Do I? If I take him to my bedroom what will happen? Do I want to stop this now?
No, I don't. I decide to embrace my newly found inner-boldness and take his hand.
"Yes." I reply. I turn and lead the way. We walk up my narrow staircase, carefully until we reach my bedroom. The cottage is small, only two bedrooms upstairs, mine and a spare room, and a small bathroom. I lead him across the threshold and into my room. Then I panic. Now I've got him here, what do I want to do with him?
I walk to the bed slowly and sit down, pulling him with me. He gazes at me, eyes hungry. The passion that cooled ever so slightly on our walk upstairs is now red hot again. He leans in and pushes me back gently onto the bed. I fall back and take him with me. Soon we are kissing, mouths and hands hungry. It's a repeat performance of what happened on his bed earlier. Edward sits back and removes his shirt.
"That's better," he murmurs and moves back in. His naked skin feels searing hot against mine. I run my fingers down his spine, feeling the warm, firm skin, so silky smooth under my fingers. Edward kisses my neck and shoulders, raining kisses over my naked flesh. Soon he is kissing and nuzzling my breasts again, lavishing them with attention. Then he suddenly stops and sits back on his heels. I am stunned and cold from the loss of him. Why has he stopped? Then I realise.
His hands travel down to the waistband of my jeans and he hovers over the button. He looks up, asking the unspoken question. Here it is, my last chance to stop him. Should I take it?
My inner perv decides no. I find myself nodding and he unbuttons my jeans and removes them. Now I am naked, apart from my knickers. Luckily they're plain cotton, nothing too embarrassing. Not that sexy either though. Edward moves to my side and lies down next to me. He kisses me softly, as I feel his touch trailing down my body. Down, down, down further until he grazes the waistband of my knickers. His fingers trace it slowly, and slide downwards over me. Just a gentle touch but it's enough to make me gasp. No one has touched me there in a long time. He does it again and I moan.
He returns his mouth to mine, kissing me furiously and then his fingers slide inside. I am so wet. Really, really wet. He strokes me softly, spreading the wetness around, as I gasp and pant. Then he plunges two fingers inside me. Those long fingers. I am writhing and moaning under his touch, as he thrusts them in and out, stroking me with his thumb. This isn't going to last long. I feel myself racing towards my second orgasm of the day.
Then I feel his hardness against my thigh. I want to touch him. But am I brave enough? My previous experience in "handling" men isn't great. I don't want to disappoint him. I reach out with a tentative hand and stroke him over his jeans. He gasps. Oh my! I trace the shape of him and realise how long and thick he is. Much bigger than I've ever felt before. I stroke him slowly and he groans. His fingers pause slightly, but he doesn't stop.
He pants in my ear, "Are you sure?"
I can't form words so I keep stroking him, hoping he'll get the hint. He does. He sits back and removes his jeans. I instantly feel the loss of his fingers inside me. He lies back down next to me in his boxers and moves in for another kiss. Right, Bella, be bold. You can do this. I tentatively slide my fingers inside his boxers. He hisses. Oh God. He's so hot and hard and big, the skin silky smooth. Focus Bella, you know how to do this.
He slips his fingers back inside me, stroking, probing like before. I free him from his underwear, grip him firmly, and start slow strokes. He moans loudly and thrusts into my hand. Mmm. I like this. I like being able to do this for him. I feel so empowered and speed up a little.
He groans in my ear, "So good, so good."
I must be doing something right. I keep going, increasing the pressure slightly. His hips still thrust into my hand. Then his fingers resume their movements, faster than before.
"Bella, I'm going to come," he growls. "I need you to come for me, please?"
He speeds his movements and moves to kiss and suck my breasts. He sucks my nipple into his mouth, hard, and curls his fingers and I am done.
The white heat shoots through me and I am coming around his fingers, trembling and shuddering and murmuring his name. A couple of firm strokes from me and he joins me, spurting hot streams over my stomach. I keep stroking until he finishes. He pulls me close as we slowly come down. I realise I am sweaty, and more than a little bit sticky.
Edward grabs some tissues from my bedside table and helps clean me up, an apologetic look on his face. Then he pulls me back to him for a hug and kisses my nose.
"Bella, oh Bella, what you do to me," he murmurs, tenderly, as we lie there together. After a short while he moves and sits up.
"I hate to leave you, but I really should go," he announces. I nod shyly, and slip some clothes on with my back to him. Now the moment has passed, it feels awkward again. I walk him downstairs. He collects his jacket as we walk to my door.
Edward pulls me to him. We kiss for a few moments before he moves away, leaving one last soft kiss on my lips.
"Goodbye, Bella. I'll be in touch very soon. I promise." He turns and walks to his car.
I lean in the doorway, instantly bereft. He gives me a small wave, hops into his car and drives away. I stand there as I watch him go, thinking over the day's events, stunned, and now a little lost.
Oh my goodness, what a day!
A/N
Love it? Hate it? Let me know. I love hearing from you.
Come and play on the Twilighted thread. The link is on my profile. You can also follow me on Twitter, I'm hongkongfooey73. Edward now has a Twitter, you can find him as Cuddleward. He doesn't seem short of admirers so far… We are trying to persuade AwkwardElla to get one, but so far she is being a bit reticent.
I was recently interviewed by Tazz's Twilight Obsession. It should be up later today. Link will be on Twitter and Twilighted.
Thanks again to my awesome pre readers annetteinoz, pearl421 and VampireGirl69.
Mega thanks to my Beta Team, JAustenlover and EMCxo, who, as usual, have been immense, even beta-ing from the air. Love you two hard.
Some new recs this week.
"Radio Edit" by Pinkhoodie85. This is a great story that seems to be flying under the radar. Take a look, Medward is HOT!
And something a little bit different. Not a Twilight fic as such.
"What happens in NY stays in NY" by ClaireP
School holidays start here at the end of this week, so I can't promise regular updates. Although I will need to do something to keep sane. We shall see.
Til next time