The Point of No Return

Naruto whimpered, wrapping his legs tighter around Kakashi. Attacking Kakashi's lips, Naruto held on as Kakashi carried him upstairs. Getting to the top of the stairs, Kakashi leaned Naruto against the wall. "Which one?" he rasped.

"Second." Naruto got out before kissing Kakashi again, whimpering at Kakashi's hands on his ass. As Kakashi opened the door, he sat Naruto down on wobbly legs. Eyes burning, he grabbed Naruto's shirt, pulling it off. Breath hitching, he took Naruto in, drinking in the toned chest, the low dipping jeans, the trail of hair leading to...

Swallowing hard, Kakashi's brain gave one last feeble attempt to stop Kakashi from going full on stupid. Kakashi looked at Naruto. He could stop this. He could. He should. He...

Naruto took the hesitation as rejection. Shoulders sagging, Naruto looked down, crossing his chest with his arms self consciously. "You don't want me?" Naruto asked. The tone of his voice broke Kakashi's heart.

"Wha...no, that's not it." Kakashi said, taking a step towards Naruto. Cupping that face in his hands, forcing Naruto to look at him, Kakashi swallowed thickly at the pain in those blue eyes. "I want you so badly..." he bent down, gently kissing Naruto.

Naruto pulled away, eyes glassy. "But... " He turned and went and sat on his bed. Kakashi stayed where he was, letting out a heavy sigh.

"But it's wrong. I'm married. I'm older than you. You're my student." Kakashi listed off every reason he could think of why this was wrong and wouldn't work. Blue eyes stared at him.

Naruto turned his head. He felt incredibly empty...so empty, it felt as if he would implode on himself. Putting his head in his hands, he willed himself not to cry. He wouldn't be silly. He wouldn't be weak. This wasn't a break up...hell, it wasn't even a hook up. Nodding, he stood up. "Yea, right. Sorry Kakashi-sensei...for everything." Grabbing his shirt, he slipped it on. "Follow me, I'll let you out."

Kakashi nodded woodenly, pulling his mask in place. Grabbing his shirt from the foyer, he slipped it on. Walking out the door, he heard it lock behind him. He had did the smart thing. He had done the right thing. But if he was so smart, and so right, why did he feel so empty?

\/\/\/

Monday morning Naruto got up, his eyes feeling like sand. He had allowed himself the luxury of crying when he knew he was alone. Pulling on jeans and a blue teeshirt, he ignored breakfast, grabbing his stuff and heading to school to be tutored. The only thought in his mind the same one that had been running through it since Kakashi told him no. Why am I not enough?

\/\/\/

As predicted, when Naruto got to school, the doors were locked. Sighing, he pulled out his cell phone and texted Kakashi: Outside.

Within three minutes the door opened. Kakashi stood there, looking impeccable and nonplussed. "Mr. Uzumaki." He gestured Naruto in. Naruto avoided his eyes, heading into the school. Going to the classroom, he sat down, pulling books out.

"Mr. Uzumaki, I...well..." Kakashi stuttered slightly.

"Look." Sharp blue eyes stared at Kakashi, almost boring through him, "I fucked up. I get it. We don't have to have a replay. I'm your student, sensei." I don't want to hear about how I'm not enough...how nobody chooses me first...how nobody wants me most. Naruto was almost successful in keeping the pain out of his voice...almost. Kakashi swallowed, wanting to explain, wanting to pull Naruto into his arms and comfort him. But he couldn't...for the reasons he said last night. Sighing, Kakashi nodded, starting the lesson.

\/\/\/

And so it went. Both men went through the motions that week. Naruto played the part of the attentive student, Kakashi the strict and uninterested sensei. By Friday Kakashi was losing his mind...and his patience. He was snapping at little things. He seemed to always have a headache right behind his eye. He didn't know if he wanted to smack the shit out of Naruto or kiss him. But something had to give. Back at home, Kakashi picked up his phone, calling his friend.

"Kakashi! My eternal rival and eternal brother, how are you doing?" Guy's chipper voice came through the phone. The headache got stronger behind his eye. Eyebrow twitching, Kakashi stopped himself from screaming. "Guy, why don't you come over and have dinner? We haven't been able to talk in awhile." Kakashi asked, hoping his voice came out as calm as he was trying for.

"Right away." The phone went dead. And Kakashi knew that he wasn't as calm as he was trying for.

\/\/\/

As the man with the black haired bowl haircut stepped into the home, taking off his shoes, he looked at his old friend. Kakashi was not doing well, that much was for sure, but Guy was not sure why. Last he talked to Kakashi, school had started, Rin and Rinni were doing well, and life seemed to be good. But, Guy could tell, life was not good. Not at all.

Kakashi sat down salads and cups of tea. Guy took it, letting Kakashi lead the conversation. Kakashi would talk...on Kakashi's time. Guy listened politely and played along with Kakashi's mindless talk catching up. Guy knew he wasn't there just for a catch up session. Guy was Kakashi's oldest friend, besides Obito. However, Obito was dead, and Kakashi still grieved Obito's death. Obito was a brother to Kakashi, as was Guy. Kakashi took Obito's death hard, as did Guy. Guy had told Kakashi it wasn't his fault, but Guy was never sure if Kakashi believed him.

It was this sense of fucked up loyalty that led Kakashi to make his greatest mistake, in Guy's opinion. Rin had always been friends with the three, but it was obvious that Obito loved Rin. In fact, it was on the way back from buying her an engagement ring that Obito died from that Akatsuki scum. Kakashi had one of his "feelings" and had rushed out, but it had been too late. Obito lay dying. Obito's dying wish was for Kakashi to take care of Rin. Pressing the ring into Kakashi's hand, Obito made Kakashi make a deathbed promise...to marry Rin, keep her happy and safe all the rest of her days. He made Kakashi swear it on his shinobi honor. Kakashi used the ring Obito had bought at the wedding. Rin still wore that ring to this day.

As the shadows drew long, Guy sat looking at Kakashi. Never had he seen his friend so sad. Finally, Guy sighed. Kakashi raised his eye to Guy. "You're not buying this, are you?"

Guy raised an eyebrow, shaking his head no. Kakashi let out a shaky breath, refilling his tea cup. "I met someone." Kakashi whispered. Guy kept silent, keeping the surprise off of his face. This was unlike Kakashi unless...

"Your Sōrumeito?" Guy whispered. "Those come but once in a lifetime...if you are lucky."

Kakashi's eye got wide. "Wha...my soulmate...no, no Guy, nothing like that." Kakashi's eye slid to the side as Guy stared skeptically at Kakashi. Kakashi had never even noticed another person. When Kakashi made a promise, he kept it. Pushing slightly, Guy took a sip of tea.

"Okay, well then, who?" Guy was carefully watching Kakashi's face.

"It's a student...Naruto Uzumaki." Kakashi sounded miserable.

"Oh..." Guy nodded in understanding. "You feel as though you failed him?"

Kakashi nodded. "Very much so." he whispered.

"Well, tell me about him...perhaps I can help." Guy offered.

"Well...he's 17, he's a junior, and he's a new student...just transferred to private school. He's..." Kakashi's eyes got a far away look in them; "got blonde hair, and the most gorgeous blue eyes I've ever seen. He has dyslexia, so I'm helping him with early morning tutoring sessions. He's doing really well, too." The light had returned to Kakashi's eye. "He picks up on things so quickly; he's so determined...and stubborn." Chuckling, Kakashi thought back on Naruto. "He's a wonderful, handsome young man who will go far."

Guy swallowed. Looking at his friend, he realized that Kakashi didn't think he had failed a student...Kakashi felt as though he had failed Naruto as a person...as Kakashi's Sōrumeito . "Kakashi, my brother...I fear that I understand what is going on here." Kakashi looked up, relief in his eye.

"You do?" Kakashi asked.

"Yes. You have finally met your match, your Sōrumeito . You are at the Fukki funō-ten."

\/\/\/

The Point of No Return...Kakashi lay awake, thinking long after Guy had left. Was he at the Fukki funō -ten? Would his next steps truly define his future? Rolling over, Kakashi couldn't sleep, only being able to see blue eyes.

\/\/\/

Naruto had been miserable. Not only had he let his dick get in the way, he had lost a friend. He thought of Kakashi as a friend. He enjoyed spending time with the silver haired male. Naruto felt...comfortable...whole with him around. Without Kakashi, he felt like an empty shell.

Sasuke tried to care...he called and checked on Naruto. Naruto was a terrible liar, so he just told Sasuke the truth...he had asked someone out and they shot him down. Naruto didn't feel the need to clarify who, and he knew Sasuke wouldn't ask. If Sasuke assumed, well...he never said. And Naruto was fine with that. He didn't feel like having a talk like that with Sasuke.

Naruto tried to be happy for Sasuke. He seemed pretty happy with Oreo. Oreo wasn't the best influence on Sasuke, but he seemed on the grey side of society, which was better than the straight evil side. Sighing, Naruto gripped his pillow, burying his face in the sheets. Time was supposed to heal all wounds...but time seemed to be ripping him apart from the inside out. The more time away from Kakashi, the worse Naruto felt. And the worst part of all was that Naruto couldn't fix it.

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