A/N: Just a short chapter to show the dream of the purple Troll. We're only a few inches away from the end of the story. Thanks for everything! So, without any further ado.
Disclaimer: I still own nothing...as always.
What have I done? Why did I turn my back against my friends? I sold 'em out for what? For myself. Because I didn't want to die, Poppy must've hated me by now. Not only her, but every Troll I'll ever know will hate me. They'll all hate me for what I've done, not only to Poppy and our friends…but also for what is about to happen to them soon. I sat inside the dark bag where the Bergen they called Chef placed me. I meditated, I needed to uproot the cause of my distress before it grows big. I ventured through the astral plane and watched all my memories flash inside my head like a dream. I started with when we were young, the time where it all began.
You see, I was never the cool, calm and wise Troll like what most Trolls believed. It was a mere façade, a mask that I never wanted to take off. Because if I do others will see how insecure I was. Most of my friends believe that all things are running smoothly inside my head, but no…it never did. My heart is filled with fear. Fear that even my meditations can't take away, so I played my game. A game of pretention and deceit. A game that only I knew how to play.
I've always known that Branch was never grey when we were young. Sometimes, I wonder why most Trolls believed that he was born with such colors. He used to have this awesome color…blue…like the sky. And his hair is the deepest shade of cobalt. I envied his colors. I mean, what am I? A purple Troll with turquoise and blue hair! I never liked the colors I have…how could I? I never saw beauty in my outer being.
"Branchy!" I heard someone call. Ah, there's the Troll I've been longing to see. She's the reason why I became the way I am today…Poppy. Don't get me wrong, I was never mad at her; in fact, I love her…I always did. However, there is one tiny problem, she pays attention to only one Troll among all of her friends, that's not me, but Branch. She adores him very much, like he's the best Troll that has ever existed. Like I never existed. Sometimes, I'd watch them play, imagining that I was the one with her. Why does the King have to entrust his child to Branch's Grandma anyway? Cybil could take care of a child too. I sighed.
Seeing this again, somehow, relived the pain that I've been suppressing for a very long time. Why am I hurt anyway? Maybe because she calls him with that special nickname she had for him. She never gave her other friends nicknames, not even me. Only Branch. She'd always run to him first and give him the tightest hugs. She'd always choose to be in his team everytime we play. She'd always hold his hand everytime we walk over the branches of the Troll Tree when we were kids. I'm hurt maybe…maybe because I wished I could be Branch.
Each day that passed made me grew even more jealous of the blue Troll. I wanted to show them, especially Poppy, that I'm way better than him. So, I trained hard, meditated almost day and night to prove them my point. Funny, I've endured great pain and suffering just to impress a child who was merely a year old. I don't even know if she was aware of the things that were happening around her. I never thought of that back then. All that I could think of was how I could get her to like me more.
"Poppy and Branch are sitting on a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G" the other kids chanted. I never took part to that silliness. How could I? I would never pretend to be fine with such thing. Because I never was. I would just watch over them from a distance and think of a great way to steal the moment, to get the attention…and make it mine. I'd always prefer a lightning bug to hold me by my hair and transport me to their location. I'd have an instant spotlight with those creatures around.
Whenever I arrive, I'd always act cool and calm…and speak words of wisdom. All the other kids would be overjoyed to see me. Except two. I could always tell that Branch doesn't like my presence, as if it bothered me in any other way. However, Poppy has never showered me the same attention the other kids did. Even when I arrive, she'd just ignore me and hold unto the blue Troll.
When a Bergen came one time when we were playing Hide 'n Seek, Poppy chose to stay by his side. Branch has always acted like a leader to us, I wanted to be that guy. To be the one in charge and not the one following his orders. So, I acted the same way he does. I tried to be assertive and tried to be a leader in my own way. I was not being myself, I know. The moment the Bergen left, I tried to act as the leader and take the spotlight from him. I acted strong and brave because he is. "We better go back home. They're probably worrying about us." When he commanded, everyone listened to him…but when I did, it was as if they never heard a single word I've said. I envied him more.
On the day of Poppy's first birthday, I made sure that I'd bring her a very unique gift. A gift that would surely knock even Branch's gift off. She'd surely like me for my gift, but when Branch arrived…she immediately hugged him tight and clung onto him. The party went by with the princess only holding his hand. She'd only let go if her father would lift her unto his arms. I noticed one thing that night…King Peppy always hands the princess to Branch and not to any other Troll. What does Branch have that I don't? Even the King likes him, what about me? I moved out of that memory and proceeded to the next one as it became too painful in my chest. Let's see, how about this memory?
"Branch!" I heard his Grandma call. I saw everything that day…when the Bergen took his Grandma. I decided not to help them because I wanted him out of our lives. I was wrong though, the Bergen took his Grandma, but not him. I saw him fall, but I dared not to help him. I kinda thought that he was gone because I haven't seen him for days after the incident. I felt guilty all of a sudden. Why did I wish something bad to happen to him?
Cybil has always told me about "Karma". She told me that whatever we do to others will go back to us. I wished something bad happen to Branch, and that probably triggered the wheel to move…so something bad happened to me after. Chef, whom I didn't know when I was young, took me from the Tree and placed me in a cage. I thought that I will never ever get back home again, so I prayed and meditated. Luckily, King Peppy arrived just in time, before the other Bergen chef could cook me. Maybe…that's the reason why it was so easy for me to betray them. Because…I was afraid. The moment I entered the King's mouth, I felt the same fear I felt that day. The only difference is that no one would save me from the Bergen's mouth except myself.
After moving out of Bergen Town, I promised myself that I won't be resentful anymore. That I won't envy anyone anymore. I thought Branch was gone, so I no longer have any competition to Poppy's attention. I was wrong…I was dead wrong, Branch was alive. I saw him one day, while me, Poppy and the others were playing on the outskirts of the village. Poppy shouldn't see him, I can't risk on losing her and everyone else's attention, but it was too late. Little Poppy saw him and went after him, giving him the tightest hug I've ever seen. However, a slight turn of events took place that day. You see, instead of letting her hug him…he pushed her away. I don't understand why he was suddenly cruel and distant to her. But—But that could be my chance…the chance that I've waited for a long time. A chance that I won't let slip away from my grasp.
Branch turned grey and would not want any interaction with other Trolls like Poppy. So, I made sure that Poppy and I would be friends and that she'd forget about Branch, by forget, I meant totally. I succeeded. We became close, closer than I imagined, but still something was not quite right. She was giving the same attention to all her friends! I want her attention towards me to be special, just like the way she used to give Branch. I felt jealousy take over me again, but at least the blue Troll was no longer with us anymore. She won't give so much attention to him anymore…or so I thought.
When Poppy learned how to throw a party, she made an invitation, lots of them. It all looked the same, my invitation, Suki's, Satin and Chenille's, Guy Diamond's, all of us received identical invitations. Anyway, that's the time she saw Branch again after a very long time. I thought she'd remember. That seeing him again would remind her how close they were when we were younger, but to my relief she did not. She handed an invitation to the grey Troll, but he threw it away and yelled at her. I felt so much anger towards Branch that day. She made Poppy really upset, but somehow, I'm glad that he did because that'd send her away from him more. I was wrong.
I thought she'd give up on him after their first encounter after a very long time. However, each party that she'd throw she'd always give out identical invitations…save for one, Branch's invitation. She'd always make his invitation extra special, unlike mine, which looked exactly like the other invitations she made. I felt inferior to Branch again. For the next years, she made sure that his invitations were different from the rest. She'd make it unique. Even though he'd shut her off and yell at her, she never gave up on him. And now, seeing her with him inside that cold metal cage brought back so much pain in me. Maybe that's the root of my distress? Because I loved her. I spent most of my life impressing her, but I allowed fear to take control of my decisions. Now, Poppy hates me, everyone would hate me. What I did to her and the kingdom was wrong, and I could never think of any good explanation for that. At least, they'd die with a clear conscience, unlike me…
"We're here" I heard the Bergens say followed by the sound of the zipper of the bag where the Bergen Chef placed me. "Do your thing now, get us the Trolls. And don't you dare try betraying us". I nodded slowly and reached for Poppy's cowbell. I chose this destiny for myself, and I must stand by the decision that I made. Forgive me...
A/N: I've always seen Creek as an attention-seeking Troll, I don't know. He just sort of reminded me of my classmate from 5th grade. Ugh. Anyway, I also got some inspiration from one of my friends who was studying psychology. I read some of his books about some disorders and got some ideas working in my head instantly. So, hope you like it! I'll stick to my sched. and update the final chapter maybe tomorrow or the next day. So thanks again for reading this story. Got something in mind? Tell me!