Chapter 9: The Platypus with the Golden Gun

While Penelope and Perry were headed to their bosses, another platypus gazed out of a spyglass into the distance. He had a translation collar that revealed a deep, melodious Australian accent. "You will be mine sheila, one day you will be mine. Two years it has been a game of hit and run between us. Two years I have been running from the fact I was born in glass. You cursed me to live, and yet I feel such an odd connection toward you. Why? Why do I feel this way?" His red eyes pierced the horizon, willing it to burn. "Bah!" He threw the spyglass to the ground, put his right foot over the broken glass, and stepped down hard so as to cause bleeding. He gritted his teeth and swallowed the tears that were welling up in his eyes, making them redder. "Viper, come here you worthless bludger!"

The Silver Viper entered the room, did a quick bow, and said, "You called, Mr. Enigma?"

He indicated the floor and said, "Clean up this mess." She scrambled around him quickly, fumbling with the small pieces of glass. After picking up the mess, she put Enigma in his chair and began removing the glass from his foot and dressing the wound. "I appreciate you, sheila, I put that glass in my foot so as to make you feel useful." He ran his small fingers through the white streak in her hair.

She removed his hand and said, "Shall I go after Agent Penelope again, sir?" He put his right elbow on his right knee, his left elbow in his right hand, and his left hand beneath his bill in thought. Soon, his bill curved up and his teeth gleamed brightly in an evil grin. The glint in his eye belayed his intention.

"Worry not, sheila, I have an idea to make Penelope surrender," he said laughing maniacally. "Bring me my 009," he said the number like double-o-nine. His 009 was brought to him, it shone brightly casting a reflection in his evil eyes.

Meanwhile in the forest, Penelope and Perry had landed on the ground just behind the tree-line. "Aw man, they cut the grass." Penelope said looking at the field beyond. "Okay, we're going to have to just walk casually." She smoothed out the wrinkles in her dress, let go of a breath she had apparently been holding, and walked onto the field. Perry followed her. She walked around as if the whole ground was booby-trapped and her eyes kept darting to their target, the cave opposite the tree line. She stopped abruptly, so abruptly that Perry bumped into her.

"What's up?" asked Perry.

Penelope looked at the ground, then at the cave, then back at the ground again, caught in indecision. She then took a stick from the ground nearby and threw it toward the cave. "That's odd... nothing happened," said Penelope. "Take my hand," she said. She took a step forward and a circle in the ground opened up revealing a black hole. She had fallen, but Perry had a good grip on her hand, so she didn't go in.

"Are you okay?" Perry asked after pulling her up.

"I'm fine, it just startled me. I didn't think the booby traps were working. That door is typically more sensitive than that, that's why I thought we were safe." She got on all-fours and took a running start and jumped the hole. She blew some stray fur from her face and said, "Come on! Jump and I'll catch you!"

Perry hesitated at first, but just as Penelope had done, he jumped and was able to clear the hole. He exhaled and took Penelope's hand again. "You know this place better than I do, guide me."

"Okay," Penelope said, giving Perry's hand a firmer grip. They walked into the cave until no light could be seen. Despite the lack of light, Penelope was still walking at the same pace. "There are some steps coming up, do you want me to slow down?"

"Yeah, please," he said.

"They're also kinda slippery because of the underground reservoir." She slowed her pace and Perry felt their hands going down, so he slowly followed. "There's a landing coming up where I'll stop, okay?"

"All right," said Perry.

Penelope stopped and said, "Wait here, I'll be right back." She let go of his hand, her feet echoing in the darkness. Perry heard a squishing sound nearby and then the sound of flint being struck. He saw sparks in the distance. "Come on you bloody bugger," she muttered. Eventually, the sparks turned into a fire. Penelope picked up the fire revealing a torch. "We've had budget cuts, I'm ashamed to say." Her face looked sober as she said, "Follow me." It wasn't long before they reached the reservoir, where a small rowboat was sitting, tied up. "Hold this, please," she told Perry, handing him the torch. They both got in the boat, Penelope seated closer to the tip rowing, and Perry seated at the end holding the torch.

The sounds of the water moving with the oars, water dripping, and fire crackling were the only sounds to be heard. Just as the silence was getting unbearably creepy, a sound was heard. "What was that?" asked Perry.

"Sonar, echo-location, it's a signal," said Penelope. Then, she replied to the sound with a similar sound. A sound replied to her and all of a sudden a grappling hook attached itself to the rowboat and dragged them onward. This caused Perry to lurch backward and drop the torch into the water.

"Sorry," said Perry.

"That's okay," said Penelope.

She looked excited as they slowly reached shore. Their beat docked in front of a set of steps that continued into the water and began climbing the steps until she reached the top, near a wooden door with two torches next to it, one on either side. Perry followed her. When he reached the top, he found her sitting cross-legged with closed eyes. He sat down next to her and did the same.

It wasn't ten seconds before both platypuses were sent hurtling through a tube and soon, they arrived at a large Arabian table, their tails on pillows. Penelope and Perry both opened their eyes to a scary sight. A man with bloodshot eyes and large, rippling muscles was scowling and growling at them.

"Hashim! These are our guests, pay them some respect!" said a human voice. The gargantuan Hashim grunted and lumbered away. "Welcome, Penelope, welcome Perry of the O.W.C.A. You were both called here for the trial," the last word he emphasized with a growl. He stepped out of the shadows and revealed himself to be a man of medium bulk, tall height, and dark hair. "Penelope, you have interfered with this agent's mission, what is your defense?"

The room had microphones that turned animal speak into human words, so Penelope's words came out human as she said, "It was a destructive device. I might have revealed something unpleasant. I grew impatient and I have no valid excuse for interfering in the agent's mission."

"You are correct... your punishment is this: You are no longer under my protection. I place you under the care of the O.W.C.A. agent."

"But sir..."

"There is no room for discussion. You're fired."

"Fired? I thought you said..."

"Fired! Fired Penelope, you are fired, F-I-R-E-D Fired!" Penelope's ex-boss picked Perry and Penelope up by the scruff of their necks and dropped them down a garbage chute.

Penelope and Perry landed inside of a garbage dumpster full of scrap food, hair, and other things they both would rather not be in. "Oh, how could this get any worse?" asked Penelope, dismayed. It had all been a trap... and the only reason Perry was called was to be a witness to her humiliation. A purple collar dropped into her lap with her name on it as well as an address. "Yep, that would just about do it," she said, breaking into tears. She was hugging her knees and hiding her face, her shoulders shuddering as she sobbed.

Suddenly, she felt a hand on her shoulder and she jumped. Perry's hand stayed on her shoulder and he said, "Hey, it's okay." Penelope's tears almost instantly stopped.

"Thanks Perry," she said.

"Can I see your collar?"

"Sure," she said handing it over.

"This is my address," said Perry.

"Really?" asked Penelope. Oh no, this isn't going to go well. "You don't mind having a roommate, do you?"

"No, not at all, I always thought I could use some company. Especially in the coming days, my boys are off from school on summer break and they're typically really busy."

"What are they doing out here already?"

"They're just visiting their grandparents... we better get going," said Perry, extending his hand to help her up.

She took his hand and said, "Thanks, I hope I'm not intruding."

"Nah, I'm sure it will be fine."

When they both got home, they were just in time to be packed into the car. "Oh, there you are, Perry," said Phineas, picking said platypus up. "Look, it's Penelope again, what are you doing here, girl?" The boy took Perry in one arm and started petting Penelope with his other hand. His hand touched Penelope's collar (which she had since unwillingly hooked to her neck) and he looked at her tag. "That's odd, why is our address on here?" A homing pigeon flew out of the woods and landed on Penelope. Ferb took the pigeon in his hands and detached the following note:

To Flynn-Fletcher family,

This platypus has been wandering the woods going from place to place without a permanent home. Thus, we have decided, based on your history with platypuses, that she should be placed with you. I shall be coming to your house in two weeks to check on the young monotreme. If you have any questions, comments, or concerns, write them in letter form and place it in your mailbox, with no stamp.

I remain faithfully vigilant,

Mr. E

ALPHA

"I've never heard of them, why are they sending us a platypus?" asked Linda, the boy's mom.

"Well, it seems like this Mr. E expects us to hold onto her for at least two weeks. If she really has nowhere to go, we should take care of her. Please, Mom, can we keep her?" asked Phineas, giving his mother large begging, eyes. Ferb joined in the begging, supporting his brother.

"Penelope can stay, but on the condition she is taken good care of until Mr. E picks her up," said Linda.

"All right! You hear that, Penelope? You can stay!" cried Phineas, happily.

Oh boy, thought Penelope.

So, the boys brought Penelope home with them. They got home in the evening and decided they would put her in Perry's pet bed since he didn't use it that often. Perry went upstairs with his boys, leaving Penelope alone in their living room beside their couch.

I'm in his bed. I'm in his house. Am I awake? Penelope asked herself. She pinched her arm. Yep, I'm awake. She took a moment to take in her surroundings. At least here with Perry, I'm safe from the Enigma, or as I've come to call him, the Platypus with the Golden Gun.

So... what do you guys think? Who do you think the Enigma is? Where does his obsession with Penelope stem from? What does he mean by "Born in glass"? This chapter title is based off of The Man with the Golden Gun. I hope you guys keep reading and reviewing, things are getting ready to heat up, so stay tuned!