Chapter 10

Jace hung around for a while asking Alexandria questions about the reversal. But what invoked a laugh out of Alexandria was whenever Jace brought up Jonathan. "Jennifer is her name to me." Alexandria chuckled shaking her head. "Never could kill her to be honest." Everyone gawked at Alexandria.

"You didn't kill her?" Jace demanded his golden eyes blown wide.

"Jensen tried once by a river, cut off her hand. Then in the demon dimension…" suddenly aware of even Maggie's eyes on her she sat up uncomfortable. "Well…I uh… you see…and…" her voice faltered as she looked around at all four of them staring at her like some kind of mutant. "Uh…"

"Where is she?" Maggie asked. Alex met her gaze before looking away seeing the disbelief and distrust in her eyes.

"Wait you don't know?" Jace demanded looking at Maggie.

"I thought she died on those steps." Maggie answered before looking at Alexandria who liked like all she wanted was to disappear, away from the accusations, away from the horrified disbelieving stares. Away from the world. "Alexandria." Maggie coaxed softly. "What did you never tell me?"

"Well, you see…um." Instinctively, she covered the scar on her shoulder cutting around going to her heart, her arm blocking it even if it was under the clean white shirt. "I was just…and it was…"

"Did you help Jennifer…live?" Magnus asked unable to hold it back. Alexandria looked around wildly before Alec caught her gaze and held it.

"Lay off of her." Alec said snapping to his senses. The terror and fear in her eyes was too raw and terrible for him to stand. "She hates everyone staring at her like this." Alec said coming to her defense. She gave him a grateful look before dropping her eyes to the bed.

"Let's give her some room." Magnus suggested taking Alec by the arm and motioning to the door to Jace. Once those three had left, Maggie just watched Alex, her hair covering her face and still ruffled from the fight.

All her clothes had been changed to a pair of black cargo pants and a white cotton tee but it still complemented her. Maggie loved seeing Alex in white. It made her look angelic and sweeter if possible. But she knew in those deep troubled eyes would be pain and anguish. "Baby, are you going to say anything to me?" a minute ticked by. "That's a no then. Alright, tell me where I go wrong?"

"I'm sorry." Alex choked out hiding her face behind a curtain of hair. Her voice was tight and tear strangled.

"What exactly are you sorry for?" Maggie demanded softly not wanting to press a knife into a bleeding wound. Alex sniffed and it was clear she was crying. But Maggie refrained herself from holding her. "Where is Jennifer? Why is she not dead? We saw the body. I saw the body." A question danced in her mouth. Is this what you're not telling me? Alexandria was fearful and out of character. She had pushed Maggie and gotten furious in moments. Was it guilt for keeping Jennifer alive?

"Everything." Alexandria pressed the heels of her hands into her eyes. "Everything I come near, I screw up." Her voice was shaking. "I'm sorry for being a screw up. I'm sorry I lied Maggie."

"Lied? Alexandria, talk to me." Alex covered the scar that was under her shirt with one arm again while looking at the rough ruthless scars crisscrossing the other one. Proof she was a failure. Proof she was a screw up.

Maggie stood up and sat down by Alex smoothing her hair back, tucking it behind her ear before sighing. "Tell me everything."

"You'll hate me. You'll want nothing to do with me and I'll lose you and…I can't go through that. That's why I lied and tricked you. That's why I'm a horrible person and…that's why I wasn't supposed to be born." Maggie couldn't hold herself back anymore and she wrapped her arms around the crying girl holding her close to her chest.

"You are no screw up. You are perfect and sweet and worthy of so much. Alex, I could never leave you. Never hate you. Do you understand?"

"You wouldn't say that if you knew." Alex said softly the hand on her shoulder tightening. "I helped Jennifer live on because… she didn't deserve to die." Maggie drew back and stared at Alexandria who traced the scars on her arm with her eyes. "None of that was her fault. It was Valentine's, she poisoned her daughter. And there was a chance, be it a small one, but she wasn't all bad."

"How can you say that?" Maggie asked softly. "Alex, she tried to kill you. She nearly took me away from you."

"That wasn't her fault and I couldn't just let Carter kill her. I intervened. She's still alive out there. Back home. If the Clave found out… if Jensen found out…they would destroy me. Strip me of my marks." Tears welled up in her eyes with more force and vigor. "I would be exiled and a bigger screw up than I am now." Alex let out a sob. "Jennifer and I, we're so alike, if that's how they treated her, what would they do to me? I'm just like her if not worse. I know where she was coming from."

"You're nothing like her." Maggie demanded standing up in front of Alex. "Jennifer tried to kill all the Shadowhunters. Turn them into something else. How are you anything like her? You're sweet and protective and compassionate."

"She was abused and taught one way of life. Even when she did her best, she was punished and pushed. Her blood is tainted just like her name. I would be her if I didn't have Jensen and Isaac and had Maxine and if I didn't have you. So I couldn't let her get murdered for the only thing she knew. It wouldn't be fair Maggie." Alex looked up and her eyes flashed silver under the tears. "I protect. She was under attack. I'll carry any burden."

Maggie was taken aback by Alex's boldness. Along with the cutting silver flash of color. Alex blinked and started crying harder wiping away the tears with the hand not covering her chest. "Baby," Maggie was at a loss. How had she never seen the way Alex felt about Jennifer? She had noticed the change since the fight but…She was supposed to know her girlfriend.

"I'm sorry for not telling you but…you hated Jennifer and now you're going to hate me for keeping her alive. But I'm not sorry for my actions." Where was this confidence coming from? Maggie wondered.

"Alexandria, you are the most wonderful caring girl in the world. I don't hate you for having a heart big enough for someone like Jennifer. I admire it but… I don't like you being around Jennifer." Alex looked away with a sniff. "I still love you." She kissed Alex's cheek tucking the other half of her hair back. "You look lovely in white." Maggie said breathily.

Alex gave a strangled laugh feeling some tension in her chest release. "Hardly." She managed through the tears in her throat. "I love you too Maggie."

"Is there anything in that beautiful mind of yours? Anymore secrets locked in that golden heart?" Maggie asked her breath warm against Alex's cheek. Alex turned her head and stared at Maggie's beautiful golden green cat eyes sparkling with joyful tears. Alex desperately wanted to tell Maggie about everything dealing with her father. The poison held at bay by the dangerous treaty. The agreement to kill whoever or risk whatever necessary to keep Maggie alive and with Alex.

Swallowing the confession, she shook her head before kissing Maggie softly a hand cupping her face. Maggie returned the kiss before pressing their foreheads together. "I'm sorry you felt the need to hide this awful secret from me."

Alex swallowed feeling guilt retie her guts together tighter. "Maggie, I want to go home." Suddenly she thought of something. "Do you think anyone has feed Chairman Meow?" the girls shared a bright laugh as Maggie wrapped her arms around girlfriend still giggling, pinning Alex's arm to her chest not that she minded. No, she had her Mags. Everything would work itself out.

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