Title: Lady in Waiting

Chapter 10: Gone Girl

Although it didn't show on his face, Kankuro was in a panic. Gaara was only asleep. Sakura was finally away from them forever. Still, it didn't feel right. Nothing about the tears in Sakura's eyes or his brother's lifeless form was satisfying. Temari was right – Gaara did deserve a real life – something beyond mountains of paperwork and eating dinner every night in his office. The hard part was, there were very real consequences to a life like that as the Kazekage. It was Kankuro's job as a bodyguard and a brother to shield him from those harsh realities. Still, something told him this was just the beginning.

The beginning of something terrible.

"Damn it, wake up…" Kankuro squeezed Gaara's shoulders and shook, but his head just lolled to one side.

"What did she do to you?" He wondered aloud. Kankuro wasn't very good with chakra control or similar techniques and didn't trust himself to cause more damage by attempting to break the bind. Instead, he stood anxiously at the bedside, monitoring the redhead's pulse every now and then.

Sakura said he would wake in a few hours, but it had been at least four since she'd left, and Gaara was still out like a light. That was when the doubt began to set in.

Did I do the right thing? He asked himself. Did she trick us all?

All of a sudden, Kankuro heard the front door open and shut. He knew it was most likely Temari coming in from a teaching session or drinks with friends. He hoped it was the latter, assuming then she'd be in a mood less conducive to killing him once she saw the sheer scale of his fuckup.

"Yo Sakuraaaa! Stop moping around – let's go to the hot springs!"

Temari's tired exclamation told Kankuro it was the former, and he braced himself as the blonde pushed open the door to the spare room.

Meanwhile, only a few miles out, Sakura knew she had to rethink her plan. After spilling the beans about Mist to Kankuro, it would no doubt be the first place they'd send people looking for her. And on top of that, it would take at least five days for her to make it there by foot and boat. She no longer had that kind of time.

Still, from Suna, Sakura's choices were drastically limited. Amegakure, though close, was easily out. The high surveillance and security checks would get her as soon as she set foot in the country, no matter what kind of lame excuse she made. Also, dry heat and sand was one thing, but there was no way she could take the constant rain.

Tanigakure was bland enough, but too close to Konoha for Sakura to feel safe. Her final choice was to head from Ishigakure, to Iwagakure. The rock village was close to Suna, but Sakura knew from history that the two countries used to be engaged in years of conflict. Despite the fact that diplomatic relations had greatly improved, she imagined that even if they did find her there, it wasn't likely they would immediately cooperate with her extradition.

It was a plan based on hope and sheer luck, but at the moment, it was the only thing she had left. In the dark, she struggled to push herself to keep running. Her legs burned and her heart hammered, but even still, she struggled through the sandy earth and wind. But it wasn't the fear of getting caught that fuelled her. Sakura knew that if she stopped, she'd be forced to truly reflect on what she'd done. Who she'd left behind.

'Gaara…'

Just his name had her lost in the memory of the gentle way he'd held her gently in his lap. She hadn't planned on caring so much. She hadn't planned on caring at all. The feeling of getting tied up in someone else… it would forever be her downfall.

"Ah!" Sakura tripped suddenly over a loose root and fell face first in the sand. The earth was moist and Sakura knew it was a sign she was getting farther from Suna. She couldn't move. Her body was stiff with fatigue, and weighed down by sadness.

Sakura was sick of crying, but the tears came anyway. Just as she felt herself breaking, a strong hand jerked her up roughly by the shoulder. Moving solely on instinct, Sakura pulled a kunai from her side holster and made a sharp jab over her shoulder, aiming for soft tissue.

Nothing.

Frantic, she made a move to strike and crumble the ground with her fist, but in a flash a set of strong hands grabbed her wrists and wrenched them behind her back.

"No! Let go of me!"

O.O.O.O

Hundreds of miles away in Konoha, Ino Yamanaka woke with a start. Her heart was racing, and it felt as though someone had sent a jolt of lightning through her veins.

"Fuck!" she gasped out into the darkness. Moving quickly, hardly thinking, she switched on the light next to her bed.

Next to her, Sai rolled over, annoyed.

"Are you serious right now?" He squinted against the florescent light. His hair was glued down to his forehead and his eyes, red-rimmed from a night of drinking she'd convinced him to indulge in.

"Something's not right!" Ino repeated, this time fully awake. She swept her long blonde hair back into its usual ponytail and checked the clock. It was only a little past 11 pm. The alcohol had knocked them out early, but something else had startled her awake. It was something halfway between a dream and a premonition. Sakura's face and then blood. Flashes of darkness, like something was totally and utterly wrong.

"The fuck…" Sai sat up in bed, still groggy, and took a hard look at his girlfriend. She was still, but looked thoroughly freaked out.

"Ino," he pushed his hair out of his face. "What's going on?"

"I don't know I…" Ino grabbed at her head. "I…I had a nightmare."

Sai sighed out heavily. "Is that all? Jesus, blondie. Come back to bed."

O.O.O.O

"It's an advanced medical jutsu. We need someone from our hospital team to lift it, but I'd trust that if she said he'll wake in a few hours… he will." Temari's voice was eerily calm as she leaned over Gaara's form, but Kankuro was careful not to make any sudden movements.

"I don't know if we should trust anything she's said anymore," Kankuro muttered under his breath. All of a sudden, he felt the air in the room get chillier. When he looked up again, Temari sat on the edge of the bed holding Gaara's limp hand in hers. Her back was rigid with tension.

"And where is she now?"

"She told me she was going to Mist." Kankuro watched his sister wearily.

"And you just let her!" She spun around on him suddenly, still holding on to Gaara. Kankuro wasn't sure if she was taking his pulse anymore or just clinging on for dear life.

"It was the best thing I could do for him!" Kankuro snapped back. "Hopefully he'll wake up, forget about her, and everything can just get back to fucking normal."

He said the words, but Temari could tell he didn't believe them. What was normal, anyway? Shaking with sheer distress, she thought of the pink haired kunoichi and how vacant and down she'd seemed over the past few days. Not to mention, drunk. She was ashamed of the way she'd let herself ignore it, even when someone as level-headed as Gaara clearly couldn't. Like her siblings and most other Sand ninja, she'd been raised to tough out the hard times and never let anyone see you sweat. Those were the tactics that kept you alive in times of war, but also the very things that closed you off to the ones you loved.

"Mist…" She scoffed to herself. Temari didn't want to be morbid, but it was clear that in her state, Sakura would never make it there alive.

"Have you told anyone? Tsunade? Anyone from Konoha?" She sounded desperate, but made sure to keep her voice low.

"Are you kidding me?" Kankuro threw his hands up and then pointed at Gaara's limp form. "I've barely had time to even process this shit!"

"She's a runaway now, Kankuro! A missing-nin. Don't you know what they'll do to her if they find her?" Temari shook her head to clear the thought. "Are you sure she—

"—I'm sure." Kankuro was firm.

"Then how could you let her go?" Temari released Gaara's wrist and knelt at the bed, pushing his hair back with her fingers. She ran her thumb along the scarred kanji on his forehead. "Don't you see she means something to him?"

"She didn't even care enough to stay and clean herself up." Kankuro watched her with a look of disgust. "That's on her, not me."

"You're not a cruel person, Kankuro. Why are you…?" Temari clenched Gaara's hand and was surprised to find tears on her cheeks. "Why would you…"

"Stop it, Temari," Kankuro snapped. He hated seeing a woman as strong as his sister cry. "You know more than anyone I want him to be happy." Kankuro sat on the bed opposite his sister. "I want him to live a simple, uncomplicated life."

"And this...this is what you call uncomplicated?!" Temari snapped. She'd been unable to temper her volume that time, and Kankuro flinched.

Just as he gestured for her to keep it down, Gaara's body stirred suddenly on the bed.

O.O.O.O

As soon as she saw his face, Sakura couldn't stop the tears from falling. Even after so long, the Uchiha's cold gaze and devilish smirk still left her breathless. And in the light of the moon his features looked softer – more understanding.

"What are you doing out here?" Sasuke pulled Sakura up from the sandy mud and held her to his chest. Sakura thought of pushing away, but the warmth of his arms was so rare and addicting. Instead, she pressed her head into the space under his chin and squeezed her eyes shut. She was lost in his familiar scent – pine needles and fire.

"Sasuke-kun…" Kunai still in hand, Sakura fisted his large cape. She hated the way her voice became so cloying and babylike with him.

"You shouldn't be all the way out here," Sasuke spoke over her head. "Were you out looking for me?"

When he pulled back to hold her at arm's length, Sakura noticed the dark smirk across his lips. Suddenly, Sakura could feel a silent rage burning inside her. She wanted to crack her fist across that silent, smirking mouth, but instead, tightened her grip on the kunai.

"You think my life revolves around you?" Sakura spoke softly, but with venom.

Sasuke was quiet a moment, staring at the grimy, livid face of the woman before him. A breeze tickled his neck and he couldn't help but notice the smell of alcohol in the air.

"What are you doing out here?" He asked again, firmer.

"I'm on my way to do a mission in Ishigakure," Sakura lied easily. "What are you doing?"

She wanted to turn it all around on him, to make him feel guilty and maybe even evoke an apology, but Sasuke Uchiha was no fool. His levels of pride would take him to the ends of the earth and back again.

"Heading home to you," he said, and Sakura knew instantly it was only to make her feel like shit. He had a history of that.

"How convenient." Without thinking, she wiped a smudge of mud from her cheek with the back of the hand that held her blade. It slashed a shallow path across her pale skin. Senses dulled by the alcohol still in her system, Sakura didn't flinch.

She watched his eyes widen, presumably with a mix of concern and disgust. It amused her now to see the way people seemed to struggle with disgust when just looking at her. Sakura knew she'd fallen far.

"You might as well keep moving," She pulled her body free of his arms completely. "My home isn't your home anymore."

Ignoring the blood on her face, she turned and started to walk again. Sasuke was quick to disappear and reappear back in her line of sight.

"You've lost your mind." He glared and grabbed her forearms. "What the fuck are you doing out here? It's the last time I'll ask."

"Before what?" Sakura fought back the urge to reel back and spit in his face. "Before you hit me? Before you piss off and leave me again? Or maybe before you hold me down and—

He shoved her hard in the chest and Sakura's back hit the dirt before she could even finish the sentence. Sasuke stood over her, clenching his fists, face-flushed red with anger and shame.

"I'm sor…" He stopped himself. "You always make me… I mean, Jesus – you can really hold a grudge."

"How could you expect anything less?" Sakura clenched the kunai in her fist. "You've never been capable of caring for anyone but yourself!"

Sasuke seemed unusually enraged by the remark. "And you're not capable of spending one day not wallowing in self-pity! Get over yourself!"

Sakura was shocked into silence. Sasuke had done many things to her over the years, but he rarely ever yelled. He was the kind of man who spoke just enough to let the cruel words settle, sear, and burn.

"Get over myself?" Sakura pushed up onto her knees. "You son of a bitch."

Sasuke turned his face away from Sakura completely. As if he couldn't even stand to have anything to do with her. "I think it's time you realized how eager you are to drag everyone down into your misery and mediocrity; it's stifling."

Sakura stood suddenly. "What?"

"I'm saying, it's hard to reach someone so stuck in their own self-loathing." Sasuke said the words and then shook his head, as if he wished he could take them back.

"I lost a child." Sakura's voice dissolved into a whisper, and suddenly the cut on her cheek began to throb.

"And so did I!" He fired back. "I've lost flesh and blood time and time again in my life, but you only have so fucking long to sit on it before it consumes you. Don't you get that?"

Sakura wanted to scoff, but the sound came out as a whimper. All Sasuke had ever done was sit on his grief. It was her belief that they'd be able to overcome that together.

"But I'm starting to think now losing it was the best thing that could have happened to us." Sasuke kept his gaze over her head as he spoke, but Sakura could see the pain there.

She wrung her hands. "How could you even say that?"

"How could you not think it?" Sasuke's dark eyes trained on her once more. "You were 21, you didn't know anything about raising a child…"

"I could have learned! You left after the war and you came back home to me!" Sakura's eyes began to well again. "And I was so happy, because you chose me. You told me you wanted me. You made love to me. You left me believing you wanted a life together."

"I did." Sasuke finally faced her head on again. "…I do."

"You do?" Sakura hugged herself, chuckling through the tears. "You couldn't even stick around when I needed you the most."

Sasuke closed his eyes and closed the distance between them again. The night was still warm, but Sakura felt her skin beginning to goosepimple. It was amazing what his closeness could still do to her. Suddenly, she remembered the good times when he was home long enough to hold her by the fire while sewed the patches in his cape. He had always been a distant man, but never cruel until their loss. It seemed it was something he'd had trouble dealing with, after all.

"Sasuke-kun…you…"

He took her by the chin.

"Look. We're older now. What I thought I wanted then isn't what I need now. We can start over." He tried to kiss her, the way he usually did when he wanted to silence her, but Sakura turned her head.

"What do you want from me?" He sighed into the open space between them. "Why do you always have to be so…."

Sakura clutched herself desperately. "I want to know… Did you ever love me at all?" She rasped.

"I loved who I thought you could be." Sasuke touched her shoulder, and then ran his fingertips over her exposed collarbones. He'd never felt her as harsh as he did then. He knew something larger had changed, and he wasn't sure it was just because of the child.

"A mother to my children," he continued. "A port in the storm. That's the kind of woman I need. I think it's a life you'd like."

Sakura grabbed at the cape wrapped around his broad shoulders. Despite being gone so long, he looked fit, tan, and healthy. For a moment, she imagined what she looked like next to him.

Thin. Dirty. Weak.

He'd gone on without her, and she'd barely been able to function.

"And what about what I need? What about the life I want?" She squeezed hard until the fabric slid down his arms and she fell into him, sobbing. "Why don't you ever think of that?"

Sasuke shifted his gaze to the side. "I realize I did a lot of things wrong with you. There were… missteps."

Sakura's eyes widened. There it was. The inklings of regret. She knew it was probably all she'd ever get and yet, it didn't feel nearly as freeing as she'd wanted it to be. Instead, Sakura felt the anger rising up in her yet again. He never seemed to see her as a person. Just a pawn.

"Well I did a lot of things right after you!" Sakura beat her fist into his chest. Even under all the rage, Sasuke was quick to catch the implication.

"Excuse me?"

"Let me tell you… it felt great," she smirked, hoping it hurt. Sakura half expected him to turn on her again, but instead Sasuke stared her down, silent. But why would he care? She thought, bitterly.

In the back of her mind, she knew there had to be the possibility of other women. When he'd spent so much of his time roaming without her, a man like Sasuke Uchiha could have anyone he wanted.

"He was great," She tried again, tears still choking her voice.

"That's hard to believe," he said, smirking. "If you're so damn happy, why aren't you back home with your new fling in Konoha?"

Sakura's face burned red and she spoke without thinking. "Who said he's from Konoha?"

Sasuke looked confused for a moment, and Sakura bit her lip. No, she thought. Stop it, you selfish idiot. Don't bring him into this.

Before Sasuke could demand an explanation from her, Sakura took another few steps back.

"I have to keep moving if I want to make it to a hotel before it gets too dark to see my hand in front of my face," she spluttered out.

Sasuke seemed like he might want to push forward with questioning, but at the same time, completely irritated. He never liked having to stand around in one place for very long.

"You look like a mess. Why don't you just go back and take a pit stop at Suna before heading out to Ishi? We're only about 50 miles out." He stared at her pointedly, daring her to keep the lie up. He had no idea what she was planning, but after all his years knowing Naruto, he could practically smell the harebrained and stupid radiating off her.

"I…" Sakura struggled to come up with an excuse. Suddenly, she realized the kunai still in her hand and wondered if she could catch him off guard. Sakura knew she wasn't strong enough to take him down completely, but a few seconds distraction could be enough to break out in a run.

"Look. I know I'm flawed," He grabbed for her wrist again, and latched on just as she tried to bolt. "Your problem is that you think you're an angel."

"Is that so?" She suddenly remembered the smug look on Matsuri's face earlier that evening and the way she'd seemed so sure that Sasuke would 'deal with her.' Sakura was determined not to let that happen.

"Tsunade shouldn't allow you to go out on missions like this." He tightened his grip as she struggled and shot a dark look her way. As if he knew everything. "You should head back. Now."

Sakura used all her strength to wrench away. "That's not up to you."

They stood staring at one another for a long while, each daring the other to make the first move away from the quiet of the forest floor. Sasuke looked up to the darkening sky and sighed out.

He took off his cape, and held it out to her.

"Whatever. Take it," he demanded. "It's cold out there alone."

Sakura wanted to say she didn't need anything from him anymore, but when she didn't move, Sasuke got fed up and slipped the warm fabric over her shoulders himself. Suddenly, she couldn't find the words to tell him no.

"We'll meet again when you come back home," he said firmly, as if nothing had happened between them.

'Home.' Sakura smiled sadly to herself. 'What home?'

The moment he turned his back on her again, she spoke.

"You know…" Sakura clutched the thick cape closed over her chest and thought of how Gaara had been so desperate to save her from things he didn't even completely understand. "I don't know why I expected you to do more to stop me."

Sasuke stared out at the break in the trees and the horizon ahead. He could see the wind blowing grains of sand in a small dust storm. Small, insignificant things thrown into turmoil by something so trivial. Small, insignificant things that built up into ache and pains.

"Stop you from what?" He furrowed his brow.

Sakura smiled to herself and wiped the wetness from her cheeks. "Nothing."

"Sakura—

Sasuke started, but when he turned around there was nothing at all.

O.O.O.O

AN: A relatively "boring" chapter, but hey – Sasuke! Even though he's definitely not my favourite character by a long shot, I'm trying not to make him really 2-dimensional. Without saying too much, basically, this isn't the last you'll hear from him or his interactions with Sakura. And soon, Gaara will get his own wonderful confrontation, lol. Mmm, drama.