Never the Same

Part 10

Note: Impatience is most certainly not a virtue. I had things planned out for this chapter, but then...then my impatience reared its ugly head. I feel the second half of this is a tiny bit rushed, but...it probably wouldn't have come out any better. I don't like writing for Alastair anyways, so it works out. Oh and sorry for the quality if you find it sub-par. I don't care much. I'll just go work on the next chapter.

Toodles.

Previously

Things have been getting harder and harder for the Winchesters. Tracking down the Seals and trying desperately to prevent them from being broken. To prevent more innocent lives from being lost. To prevent the Apocalypse from killing everyone.

But, slowly, things are becoming just a little too personal. Dean meeting back up with Alastair while Sammy was there was a very tense situation. So tense that he was kind of forced to secretly use his power to keep the other demon's mouth shut while he and Sam escaped.

Also, he hasn't seen Castiel since the whole incident with Uriel and Anna becoming an angel again, making him sex deprived and worried out of his fricking mind for his angel.

And this is while Sam, oh Sam, he slept with Anna and Ruby and tried to keep it from his big brother. Fat chance that would happen.

Dean found out and though he's not pissed about the moose sleeping with Anna, he is pretty angry about Sam sleeping with a demon. A fricking demon. But he also has his hands full with Sam questioning him about why he didn't take the chance to sleep with Anna instead of him and, well, Dean kept his mouth shut after that.

So, this has left the brothers back on the road, with a tension so thick between them that Dean's tempted to cut it with his knife. But he hasn't, yet, and instead reveals just a little bit more to Sam about his time in Hell.

That those four months he was dead felt like forty years and that Alastair had him on the rack for thirty of those years before he finally broke and took up the knife. That he actually liked torturing those souls. And though Sam presses him for more information, Dean is quiet after that and mentions nothing about the last ten years he spent in the Pit.

Then

Location: Cheyenne, Wyoming. Late December, 2008.

It's been a few days since Pamela's funeral. Another casualty in the war that Dean started. It's been a few more since Sam and Dean went ghost and almost got Tessa killed over one of the Seals. Dean thinks he will never be able to forgive Alastair for being such a dick.

At the moment, Dean is fricking tired and all he really wants to do right now is sleep. To just stop driving through the night to get away from all his damn grief and sleep in the crappy motel beds he's gotten so used to. But his stupid brain has to go and remind him that he doesn't need to sleep and that sleeping is pointless because he'll find no reprieve in it. At least, not when Castiel has gone AWOL.

And Sammy's not really helping with his report on Ruby following a lead and his crappy little speech about getting angry rather than being tired over all the deaths of their friends they've gone through. Dean doesn't want to hear any of it, but he doesn't have much choice when they're on the road.

Finally, they find a motel and check in, but a less than welcome guest and one very missed guest are waiting for them when they finally walk into their room.

Uriel is looking as proud as the peacock that won the drag queen contest. But Castiel, he looks like he's trying to blend into the background and kind of like he doesn't really want to be there, which hurts Dean a little because he's afraid that his angel doesn't want to be with him anymore.

But Dean shakes off the hurt and fixes an angry glare on Uriel, the pompous bastard who is probably more heartless than a demon. "Listen, we don't want to deal with anymore of your crap," he grinds out, but his soul aches and seethes within his body, trying to tell him to get away from the angel.

"Dean, we know you're tired, but-" Castiel tries to reason with the demon, look at him with sympathetic eyes, but Uriel quickly cuts him off.

"But, we don't care. We raised you from Hell and can very easily put you back," the larger angel threatens, but Dean's not really paying attention to him anymore.

Dean sees Castiel look at him for a moment. A look that's remorseful and asking for his forgiveness, but then it's gone and the angel is staring at the wall opposite him, a blank expression on his face. The demon is suspicious and can feel anger beginning to boil in his veins.

"Seven angels from our garrison have been murdered. The last one was killed tonight," Uriel continues and this has Dean's attention again.

"And you think it's demons?" the demon questions, but can't think of any way a demon could kill an angel. Angels always seem to have the upper hand whenever it comes down to a fight between grace and demon smoke.

Uriel just looks away and gives a deep sigh as his answer.

"How are they doing it?" Sam questions before Dean can get the words out.

"We don't know," Uriel admits, again cutting Castiel off from speaking and Dean's even more suspicious now.

"But we do have Alastair," Castiel speaks up as he walks towards them, but stops as he's standing just a step behind Uriel. "Unfortunately, we can not get him to talk. His will is strong."

"Yeah, well, you guys are kind of out of your league. Alastair's like a black belt in torture. He won't give in to your tricks," Dean states somewhat bitterly.

"We've reached an impasse, Dean. You're our best hope," Castiel is speaking again and his tone is somber.

It's a few seconds after Castiel has spoken those words that Dean realizes what Uriel's intentions are. He's beginning to panic a little. He has nothing against torturing Alastair. The bastard deserves it. But Dean doesn't want Sammy to see him when he's at his worst.

"No," the demon grinds out, his body tense as he looks to Uriel and Castiel with a feral looking sneer, "You can't ask me to do this. I refuse!"

Uriel walks forward and it's Castiel's turn to look between his superior and his lover, with worry and exhaustion swirling behind his eyes.

"We're not asking," the big angel states when he's only a few feet from Dean.

Sam looks at Uriel and then back to his brother, but when he does that, the other three occupants of the room are gone and he's been left alone.

"That Devil's Trap is old Enochian. It will keep Alastair bound," Castiel states after Dean's taken a look around the abandoned warehouse. They're looking through the small window of the door and into the room where Alastair in his new meat suit has been chained up.

"It's going to bind me too, Cas," the demon states, uncomfortable with Alastair in front of him on the other side of a piece of glass and metal and Uriel behind him, watching and listening to their conversation.

"We'll let you back out," the angel tries to reassure Dean, but it doesn't really work and the demon still looks reluctant to step into the room.

Suddenly Dean turns and attempts to walk back out of the building, but Uriel stops him.

"You can't make me do this," Dean grinds out, anger burning in his eyes again. "I know you think you're all powerful and can force me to, but you can't."

Uriel and Dean lock gazes for a long moment, one full of ire and the other, quiet disdain. But the silence is broke by one trench coat wearing angel who steps away from Alastair's door.

"We are asking too much of you, I know. But, Dean, we need your help," Castiel quietly pleads and his voice takes the edge off of Dean's anger just a little bit, but it's enough to get the demon to back off of Uriel.

Dean looks back at his angel and can see the sad look in his eyes that just tear him up inside. But, then Dean's ire rises again because he knows why Uriel brought his angel along. The bastard knows that Castiel is his weakness and that he will be more willing to do anything if his angel asks him of it. How Uriel found out, he isn't sure, but he sure as hell is not happy that they know his Achilles' heel.

"I need to speak with Cas. Alone," he states none too kindly and even has a bit of a growl in his voice.

Uriel looks from Dean Winchester then to Castiel. "Very well. I will go seek Revelation. They might have new orders for us," he speaks and then departs with the sound of beating wings.

"Cas, what's going on? Why are you taking orders from Uriel like some lapdog?" the demon questions his angel.

Castiel looks away from Dean, refuses to make eye contact with him and seems reluctant to answer.

"Cas," Dean repeats his angel's name, his tone a little bit harder, needing to hear an answer.

The angel looks into Dean's eyes and seems to deflate just a little bit. "My superiors are questioning my loyalties. I have been becoming too close to those in my charge, specifically you. They fear I may begin to doubt," he admits warily and lets his shoulders sag as the weight on his heart grows.

Dean's angry all over again. He's clenching his fists tight and walking towards the door, towards the room that contains his old teacher. He feels like he wants to hit something. But he calms himself with a deep breath and tells himself that anger won't help him when he's working.

"Dean, for what it's worth, I want you to know that I would give anything to not have you do this," Castiel confesses and turns to look at the demon's back, his blue eyes made even darker with the weight of his sorrow.

The demon closes his eyes and stores away Castiel's words in his memories. He opens his eyes again and a slow, sad smile appears on Dean's lips. He conjures up his set of interrogation tools straight from the Pit.

"I'll get you your answers. Just wait outside," Dean chuckles, false confidence in his tone. But he takes another deep breath and then wheels his cart into the poorly lit room. He ignores Alastair's singing taunts as he stops just outside the trap and positions his tools so that they're within easy reach.

"Are they serious? They're sending you to torture me?" Alastair laughs dryly, a crooked smirk on his lips as he watches his former apprentice pick up various tools. "Oh. But don't break my heart, my achy breaky heart, I just don't think it'd understand. You're working for them, Dean?" The demon laughs again, but chokes on his own blood as Dean's eyes flash yellow and he extends his arm out and makes a grasping motion with his hand.

"Shut up, Alastair, I'm giving you one chance and one chance only to tell me what I want to know," Dean hisses and closes his hand a little bit tighter, wanting to choke the demon in front of him to death. But at the last minute he releases his hold and lets Alastair wheeze and catch his breath as he pulls on a pair of black leather gloves.

"Oh. Scary," Alastair rasps out, coughing while he's laughing. "Does the scaredy cat want some payback for all I did to him down in the Pit? Or, or does he want payback for what I did to his daddy?"

Dean stills for the briefest of moments, but it's all the answer Alastair needs and the older demon is chuckling while his protégé is fiddling around with his rusty instruments and holy water. Oh, is it going to hurt, but Alastair doesn't care. He's going to enjoy every moment of it because he knows it's going to hurt Dean far more than Dean could hurt him.

Castiel stands vigilant, but closes his eyes and ears to the sound of torture going on in the room behind him. He does not like what Dean is doing. He's never liked it because he knows it leaves Dean feeling less and less human every time he tortures someone, whether they are human or demon.

The demon doesn't need the hole in his heart to grow any larger. The angel is already having a hard enough time keeping it filled by himself. But he can not stop the act going on behind him, can not stop it as it continues on for what feels like hours.

After a while, Castiel moves to the table in his room and braces himself against it. He can't take the sounds anymore. But then the light bulb above him shatters and Anna is there. She tries to speak with him.

"Castiel, will you really allow this to continue?" she questions, but Castiel ignores it as it pains him to hear someone else question him.

"Anna, you shouldn't be here. We still have orders to kill you," he states somberly as Anna walks past him and to the door leading to the room Dean is in.

"I doubt you would kill me," Anna replies and watches Dean torture Alastair with a wistful expression.

"Why are you making Dean do this?" she questions again, her tone seeking answers.

"It is God's work," Castiel answers, but he feels doubt eating away at his grace and the black stain that's Dean inside of him withdraws from him, opening up a small hole in his own heart.

"This isn't God's work. It's not His Will, Castiel, and you know it. Now, go in there and stop Dean, stop the man you love before he breaks and is gone from you forever," Anna argues, but she forces herself to keep calm and watches as Castiel's resolve slowly breaks.

Dean's finally getting into his rhythm and getting ready to stab Alastair with his baby girl covered in holy water and salt when he notices something is wrong. He's caught by surprise as the Devil's Trap is broken and Alastair is cold cocking him, or he almost does. But nonetheless, Dean is dizzy after the blow and disoriented, giving Alastair the opportunity to pay him back for his generous dishing of pain.

He takes blow after blow and is getting the life choked out of him when Castiel finally comes to his aid. But the demon's kind of useless at this point and kind of pathetically lays on his side as Castiel and Alastair duke it out. Righteous fury versus cold, black wrath.

Unfortunately, Castiel is soon overwhelmed by Alastair too and he's hanging on a meat hook, about to be expelled from his own vessel when Sam comes charging in, pulling off his psychic tricks and showing off his new demon fighting powers.

Dean's honestly pissed when he sees this, but he's so relieved that Castiel is for the most part safe that he just lays back and passes out.

Later, when Dean wakes up in the hospital, Castiel heals his injuries and relays to him what went down in the warehouse after Sam showed up. His angel tells him that, thanks to Alastair, Sam now knows that his big brother is a demon. Sammy even honestly tried to exorcise him and kill him, but Castiel stopped him and explained everything to his baby brother.

Dean's not too happy about that, but hears that Sam settled down after he called up Bobby and got confirmation from the old hunter that it is Dean and not some random demon hijacking his brother's meat suit.

Castiel goes on to explain that Alastair is dead and that he and Anna had a confrontation with Uriel that resulted in his superior's death. Dean is not too surprised by this news. He always felt something was wrong with Uriel and to be honest, he was glad that the bastard was dead.

Dean finally decides to get out of bed and re-dresses himself in the clothes that he was carried in with.

"Y'know what, Cas? I think we're in a lot more trouble than we were bargaining for," Dean says with a wry smile and his angel is beside him, replying with a somber nod. But the demon's expression lightens a little and he rests his forehead against Castiel's. "You should smile more."

"Sorry to ruin this moment between lovers, but we've got some work for you to do," a mysterious voice cuts in from the side and Castiel and Dean turn to the intruder in shock.

Everything is engulfed in a blinding white light.