I Want You to Believe in Me
Kir Sirin
Light closed his eyes and tried his hardest not to let L know he had woken up.
He just needed a few more minutes.
"Light-kun," L pushed himself off the bed, "I know you are awake. You are the one who wished to stay in this room, so you must get up when I say."
Light opened his eyes and saw the crouched back of the detective he found himself dreaming about the previous night.
"L, wait…" Light took a hold of L's wrist and brought him back down to the bed.
L fell on his back and Light placed a hand on the other side of his shoulder, causing Light to loom over the detective.
"L…" Light whispered. "Can I kiss you?"
"I don't know why you would want to." L said bitterly. "There would be no real feeling behind it."
"Yes there would… I love you—"
"Don't start."
Light was taken aback by the anger in L's eyes. "L…"
"Stop saying—"
"Then let me kiss you."
L remained silent for a while and then sighed, "If you must."
Light smiled and placed his lips over L's. The detective fought to keep his eyes open, but they slowly fell close. He ran his hands through Light's hair and arched into the kiss.
The addicting taste of L finally fell back into Light's eager mouth.
Light pressed harder and heard L give a small whimper.
Which is why Light was so surprised when he was shoved off again and fell to the floor, "What..." He breathed. His palms were placed firmly behind him to support the teen's weight.
"That is quite enough." L stepped off the bed and walked outside the room.
Light followed behind him.
L went to his computer and Light went to the kitchen.
Neither of them knew how much more they could take.
Kira would have stopped this act already…
L will never return my feelings…
Could it be that these truly are Light-kun's feelings?
Maybe I'm just not good enough.
If these are his feelings… His heart must be breaking…
L probably wouldn't love someone he suspects to be Kira anyway.
Light came back from the kitchen and stood behind the thinking detective. "L, I have something for you." Light kept the smile in his voice, regardless of his shattered heart.
"I do not want it."
"But—"
"Maybe you should leave." L didn't turn to look at Light as he spoke. His fingers just worked vigorously at the keyboard underneath them. "I thought I felt something for you Light-kun, but it seems I was mistaken."
"L…"
"You should leave. Please refrain from using my professional name from now on."
Light reached over L's shoulder to drop a box of fresh, red strawberries beside his mouse that he had told his father to buy the night before. He brought his lips close to L's ear and whispered, "I thought you were never wrong, L." And with that he left the room.
He had had enough.
Light left the building.
Left L's life without telling him… Without L ever knowing how much Light Yagami had truly fallen in-love with him.
And L clutched the side of his jeans so hard he could feel his bare nails digging into the pale flesh beneath.
Kira is not capable of love.