AND NOW! The one you've all been waiting for and the one that merits a lyric!

I'm so tired of being here, suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave
Your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
My Immortal-Evanescence

Freddie,

How's the weather up there?

Hell…what am I doing? This is the fourth time I've attempted to write this week. Gave up after "Freddie" each other time.

It's been almost two months now. Feels like a day. Not because it's gone quickly, it hasn't at all, but because I still feel the same as I did the day you died.

It's Percy's fault. I don't doubt that at all, he could have saved you but it was you who died, Fred, not Percy. I almost can't believe I'm saying this but I'm going to be completely honest, it should have been Percy rather than you. I don't even know why I believe that, I think I just want something to believe. Anything. Even something as horrible as that is.

I'm not good, Freddie. I feel like I'm dead and every day just gets harder to make it through. The shop's still closed and I know that you probably hate me for that. But I don't wanna reopen it yet. Heck, I don't know how long it will actually be until I do…if I do.

I didn't go to your funeral. I couldn't bear it. I wouldn't have been able to bear sitting there, listening to everyone sniffle and sob, listening to Dad and people who didn't even really know you talk about you. I know you. Dad wanted me to say something at the funeral, because I'm your twin. Hell no.

So, I'm sorry…but I just couldn't be there, I couldn't watch them put you in the ground. I ran off, didn't come home until late and I don't even remember where I went, only that I was trying not to cry. I failed.

I saw the coffin Mum and Fleur picked out, I saw the flowers and I saw the black. It made me sick. You wouldn't have liked it at all, it all seemed so stuffy. I know that you wouldn't want people to sit around and cry, you'd want everyone to be laughing and clapping at the fireworks you would want.

I'm so sorry, Freddie…I can't do any of that. I can't even get out of bed half the time. I've barely left our room. I certainly can't produce a Patronus…I've tried and I don't think I ever will be able to again. If a Dementor attacks, I'm screwed.

I'm not going to lie to you, there have been times I've felt like dying. Just one quick curse and it will all be over. All this pain would end and we would be together again. I'd be whole again.

I hate to be so depressed but I want to tell you the truth. We've never had any secrets from one another and I have every intention of keeping it that way. Fred, I don't know how much longer I can do this…I've never cried so much, I think I passed out crying once. I do love you, I hope you knew that. We never said it.

You have to help me…I can't do this…

I miss you, Freddie…

I love you my best friend,

George