Author's Note: Sorry I've been MIA lately, guys. I still want to upload more One Time one-shots and get to the one-shot sequel to Linchpin but I've just been hell crazy insanely busy and blaaah. I want to get to it though! So bear with me please :)
This One Time Ryland just didn't want the paparazzi around...
Paparazzi was always an issue for the Avengers ever since New York but especially Tony. Considering he was already a well known and well photographed star before he became a superhero the price tag for a photo of him went up by an absurd amount. Then when Ryland came around the ante went up even more. If a paparazzi was able to get a photo of the little family it was sure to make him a lot richer; and they were willing to do just about anything for that photo/money. They followed the family around the city, photographed everything they did and more often than not waited outside the tower for hours just waiting for someone to exit in anything but a tinted SUV.
There was a set of rules or guidelines that the paparazzi followed for the most part when it came to Ryland. He hated the flashes because they hurt his eyes and he couldn't see when there were over two dozen men with cameras all taking rapid-fire photos with dedicated flashes anywhere from 400 to 600 watts. So, if at all possible, the paparazzi didn't use their flashes. Of course there was always one idiot who didn't get the memo and at night they needed the flash in order to get their thousand dollar photos but when they stalked Ryland outside of Macy's in the afternoon, the flash was almost always left in the camera bag.
They never shouted either. It was bad enough they were there, no one needed them screaming at each other or at their subjects. So the unspoken rule was to keep it low or else Happy would step in. Of course the paparazzi would still ask questions or try to talk to Ryland and his parents whenever they got close enough but that didn't mean anyone had to respond. There was nothing they could do when it came to red carpets wherein every single photographer screamed at anyone they wanted a photo of; but they managed to keep their musings to a dull roar when they were just following the Stark's around the city.
The biggest rule, though, was to never, ever touch Ryland. Hell, Happy didn't even like it when they got close. If a paparazzi touched Ryland, even by accident, Happy was there in a second to break it up. It wasn't even that Ryland didn't want to be touched, it was just a personal line paparazzi shouldn't cross. And for the most part they didn't. But again, there was always one idiot. The only time the contact was welcome was when Ryland and Tony were headed to Broadway for a show and Ryland accidentally dropped his stuffed penguin. He was only three years old and the blue plush penguin was his best friend however in the commotion and chaos he didn't realize the bird's flipper slipped from his grasp. A paparazzi behind him picked it up and tried to return it to Ryland but Tony wasn't paying attention.
"Daddy!" Ryland yelped, reaching backwards for the stuffed animal the paparazzi tried to hand to him. But Tony was walking too fast and Happy stepped in the way of Ryland and the paparazzi. "Daddy! Happy, no! Watson!" Tony finally turned to see what Ryland was badgering him about just as Happy blocked his view of the paparazzi.
"What, Rye?" Tony asked over the sound of the camera flashes and chaos. It was really loud outside the theater but Tony was carrying Ryland so their faces were close enough to be heard.
"He's got Watson! He's got Watson!" Ryland replied frantically, trying to reach around Tony for the precious penguin. When Tony finally connected the dots and figured out what the problem was he signaled for Happy to let the paparazzi through which he begrudgingly did. The paparazzi immediately handed over the penguin to Happy who handed it to Ryland.
"Thank you!" Ryland managed to call out to the paparazzi as Tony quickly carried him into the theater. He even waved which made said photographer a good chunk of change. Usually Ryland covered his face when the paparazzi were around- if just cause of the flashes. If he had a stuffie or a blanket he'd hide his face in the fabric. He wore a lot of hoodies growing up too so that way he could toss up the hood and hide his face just a little. But his favorite way of avoiding the cameras was to bury his face in Tony's shoulder. As soon as they got close to paparazzi Ryland would ask to get picked up where he'd wrap himself around Tony like a monkey, hiding his face in Tony's neck. As he got older getting held got harder- especially for Pepper- but he still managed to keep away from the paparazzi. They even played a twisted version of hide-and-seek outside the tower when paparazzi were a street or two away still.
It wasn't until he was almost a teenager that he and Tony realized they could have some fun with the paparazzi. They did everything in their power to make the paparazzi's photos look as absurd as possible. Everything from skipping and making facial expressions to holding signs with quirky sayings in front of their faces. The team even got in on the antics, doing ridiculous things in front of the cameras when they were together.
Group shots of the Avengers were worth the most- bonus if the kids were there too- so they avoided doing menial things like shopping together too often. Tony and Natasha taking their kids to the park or Steve and Clint going out together were fine. They were even okay if three of four of them went out together at the same time; it was when all six of them hit the streets together that caused problems. Add onto that their wives and children and paparazzi went crazy.
It was fun though seeing the cover of every magazine be a photo of the group holding hands and skipping down the street or making silly faces at the paps.
The rest of the kids had it easier but still had to deal with paparazzi. They each had different reactions to the paparazzi throughout life. Anya really couldn't care less from the time it began to the time she was old enough to avoid them skillfully. Irina always liked the attention even when she didn't understand why it was focused on her but it wasn't until she got older that she realized what an image could do to or for someone. Dahlia absolutely hated it from the get go and would go out of her way to avoid them- so much so that she often refused to stay someplace if paparazzi were there. Kellen didn't like them either but less passionately and only dealt with them if necessary otherwise just held tight to Thor's hand and kept a neutral expression on his face. The twins had separate reactions too. Florence didn't like them but also didn't let them stand in her way. She'd push her way through a crowd if she had to and often times could be heard telling paparazzi to "move it" or "knock it off" when they were getting in the way. Charlotte however was her typically soft self and handled the paparazzi as such. Most of the time she just walked behind Steve or covered her face. Only when a paparazzi was being mean would she speak up or lash out but more often than not Steve was the one to push a camera down and tell a mean paparazzi he'd crossed a line.
The team also handled paparazzi in different ways. Tony was used to it and was usually pretty hammy for the cameras so long as Ryland or one of the other kids weren't there- cause according to him photographing the kids was low, disgusting and they were off limits. Pepper was also very used to the paparazzi. It took some time getting used to the cameras also being pointed at her- instead of just Tony- and if they went anywhere near Ryland she was liable to go postal, but when it came to her own photographs she just adapted a 'grin and bear it' attitude. Natasha hated the paparazzi with a Russian passion only she could posses but for the most part kept herself pretty cool when faced with them. She didn't grin and bear it, rather grimaced and rushed by, then whoever was with her got an earful when they were away from the cameras. And forget it if her girls were with her. She actually broke a paparazzi's camera once when he called Irina a little brat. Fury was pissed and it made headlines for two weeks but she didn't regret it at all- a Mama Bear thing. Clint was usually right there beside her- especially during that incident- to tell someone they went to far or to protect his girls. When the kids were little he'd tuck them in his jacket to cover them up and was usually the first to carry one of them instead of making them walk. Steve and Mickey were neutral so long as the paparazzi didn't get in the way or go near the girls but they were usually the ones who opted to stay inside most instead of going out and braving the crowds. Paparazzi was a concept so far beyond Thor's understanding and no one even tried explaining it to him- considering it was in fact an absurd thing to begin with. That ignorance lead to some interesting times but for the most part Thor just went about his life as if the cameras weren't even there. Jane was usually the same except for when she was pregnant. There was something about the pregnancy hormones that made her brutally honest which lead to her snapping at paparazzi on multiple occasions- each of which landed her on the cover of every tabloid. Bruce and Danni barely dealt with any paparazzi attention seeing as Bruce was the lease likely to recognized on the street. Of course they attracted some attention but they preferred to travel and be out of the city where paparazzi were few and far between. When they did deal with photographers they just held hands, pushed down their sunglasses and walked a bit faster.
Everyone at one point or another got aggressive with a paparazzi guy. Natasha's outbursts were most common but everyone got pushed too far at least once in a while. But everyone was really surprised when Ryland lashed out at the paparazzi the first time. He was eight-years-old and so far hadn't done anything but avoid the paparazzi. And on top of that he was a happy, gentle kid who never even hit- as most kids do. But on one day in particular he went to the park with Anya, Dahlia, Irina and Kellen and paparazzi were everywhere.
Clint and Jane were near the play set with the youngest kids, helping them out with the equipment they were still too young or small to use properly. Given Dahlia was four, Irina was three and Kellen was two they still needed a good bit of supervision at the park. However Ryland and a five-year-old Anya didn't need their family to watch over them all the time- or so they liked to think. They'd gone out just after lunch but neither Ryland nor Anya had anything to eat at home so they coerced Clint into giving them some change for the nearby pretzel stand.
"Come right back and be careful!" Clint said seriously as he handed Ryland the money. The two kids swore to be quick and cautious then ran for the pretzel cart full speed, making Clint shout for them to be even more careful and to slow down. Just in spite of him they stopped and finished their walk in slow-motion. But when they rounded the corner where the pretzel stand sat they found a few paparazzi left over from when the guys followed the group of Avengers to the playground.
Immediately sensing Ryland's despair, Anya grabbed his hand and pulled up the hood on his Avengers hoodie. "It's okay." she promised softly, her voice low enough that only Ryland could hear. That was the type of encouragement Ryland needed to ignore the paparazzi and walk over to the pretzel stand. It took a minute for anyone to realize who the two kids were but once they did, the cameras came out and the photos started.
"One pretzel please." Ryland said to the pretzel stand attendant, handing over the money Clint gave him, all the while he held fast to Anya's hand. Whenever Ryland was with his family he felt the urge to cover them up or protect them the way the adults did. So even though he hated the cameras most, he angled himself in front of Anya so she wouldn't be in all of the photos.
She was wearing a floral skirt with a pink polka-dot tank top and even though she had a cardigan on it didn't have a hood so she was pretty exposed. When they walked to the park Clint was giving her a piggyback ride so she was able to bury her face in his shoulder to avoid the cameras. But waiting for their pretzel, there was nothing to hide in. She'd left Shchenok at home too so she couldn't even cover her face with his fur.
"C'mon guys leave the kids alone." a passerby said disgustedly as he walked past, noting the five or so men taking a million pictures of just Anya and Ryland. It didn't make any sense at all and yet it was a multimillion dollar industry. "They're just trying to get some lunch."
"And I'm just trying to do my job." one of the paparazzi retorted as he continued to take pictures of the pretzel stand guy handing Anya the large pretzel. It was the slight commotion the passerby created that almost masked the other paparazzi tell Anya to fix her hair.
"It's in your eyes, sweetheart, why don't you pin it back for me?" the paparazzi asked, wanting the best photo possible. He was quiet about his comment but Ryland heard it clear as day and it made him uncomfortable.
Whenever paparazzi tried talking to the kids, one of the adults would tell them not to. So that's what Ryland did. "Hey, don't talk to her!" Ryland snapped loud enough for the paparazzi to hear. He went right into protection mode even though he really hated the paparazzi. All the guys around sort of gasped considering it was virtually the first time any of them heard Ryland speak- let alone yell.
"Just letting her know her hair is falling down." the paparazzi defended himself even as he switched his camera to video and started taping the event. He was right, Anya's pony tale was a mess of wild curls but it was inappropriate for anyone- especially a stranger- to point it out and for some reason Ryland just wanted them to know he wasn't to be trifled with.
Ryland held up the hand that wasn't holding Anya's and very sternly said, "Just don't talk to us, okay?" before walking in the opposite direction. When a different paparazzi made a comment about how rude Ryland was and how "he's got a bit more Stark in him after all" Ryland just couldn't resist the urge to turn and shout, "You jerks ruin everything! Go away! I hate you!" before running away with Anya.
Of course the paparazzi didn't in fact go away but they kept their distance. There was something cathartic about yelling at the paparazzi and afterward Ryland was able to forget they even existed for the rest of the afternoon. Anya was still a little shaken and uncomfortable having strangers talk to her though so she didn't want to play anymore. So she and Ryland sat under a nearby tree with their pretzel and an MP3 player. They had to sit really close together in order to share the headphones and listen to Ryland's favorite song. There were paparazzi a few feet away but even Ryland couldn't care as he nibbled on a pretzel and listened to John Lennon's Love with Anya.