Phoebe-the voice of reason :)

So Arnold met and interviewed with the journalist by the name of Walter. It was a good steady long 2 hour meeting which was 1 hour interview and the rest of the time of both of them chatting away. Arnold found him enigmatic in truth with his wife joining him for the last hour. To him, his wife Natalie reminded of himself for the most part while Walter reminded him of Helga. It was quite interesting to say the least.

"So tell me Arnold, since I just joined you gentlemen, what is it that you plan on doing with your life?" Natalie wondered gently.

"I wouldn't mind being like my parents actually and it isn't like a cop out. I also enjoy helping others out quite a bit." Arnold replied happily.

Walter smiled knowingly. "Yes, Helga has mentioned that you have been the neighborhood go-to guy. You'll help everyone out and it is quite a noble thing."

"She talks about me?" Arnold was surprised.

The couple in front of him nodded their heads. "My husband is quite entranced with Helga's talents. She can write and even I have seen what she submitted to the publishers. That girl will be quite famous one day." Taking a sip of her wine, she added. "Honestly we call her our adoptive daughter."

Arnold grinned at the couple in front of him. "Helga has gone a long way since I've known her. I know she'll make something of herself."

Leaning forward, Natalie had the most kindest eyes. "How do you feel about the fact that she is leaving Hillwood?"

Arnold went silent as his face looked suddenly drawn by that question. "I haven't spoken to her about it. I only heard about it from a mutual friend. In fact I haven't had much time alone with her. It is like she is avoiding any alone time."

He didn't see the exchanged looks between the couple ahead of him before Walter chimed in. "There are reasons for that, son. She is still healing from so many things and only she will have to be ready to speak to you about them."

He sounded like Confucius speaking to him when Walter said that to Arnold leaving him to hope to run into Helga alone.

It turned out to be a Wednesday when he spotted her in the park just putting her stuff in the bag, and not realizing he was there, or at least he thought so when she said his name before leaning back against the bench. Sitting down he caught the scent of vanilla coming from her as a breeze just blew past making him have to catch his breath.

She didn't look at him still as her attention was focused ahead of her. "Walter and Natalie really liked you. You keep winning fans."

"I liked them as well. They think very highly of you." He could see that she really wasn't impressed by that. Helga for the most part was always humble. "Helga, I never got to thank you personally to thank you for that wonderful gift. I thought it was amazing. My grandparents also loved it."

Helga was happy that one half of her face was covered by her hair since she refused to look directly at him. "I'm glad you all enjoyed it. You deserved it. I know you also thanked Walter for it."

Turning to look at her a little more he was infuriated for once at her hair for covering her face. "About that night at the party I didn't want her to be there at all. I thought I deleted her contact information from my phone. I also hated how she kept..."

Helga held up her hand to stop him from going on with the stupid excuses. She thought she was ready to deal with this, but she truly wasn't when it came to him. "Well you could never say no to anyone, but to one person in your entire life." Feeling he would start speaking she held up her index finger to give her a moment to speak her mind. "When I saw her there I wasn't surprised she monopolized all your time. She always had a knack for it anyhow. In fact anyone like her had a pure knack for it." Glancing down at her book bag she had never been happier in her life to be finished with all her school work before the interruption. "I wasn't surprised to see her dry humping your leg down in the living room or you bending to her will yet again at school. I never liked her. I knew she was fake the moment I met her. Saw right through the act, but that didn't stop you from following her around like a rabid dog in heat."

She felt tears about to threaten her eyes, but she willed them down just so she can speak her mind. "Never surprised about all the cardboard girls you chased with her being the Queen. Wasn't surprised at turning the corner in school one day to find you both heavily making out and you not minding her hand down your pants. I bet losing your virginity to her was a dream come true."

Arnold almost stopped her from speaking, but Helga was not holding back like she had done in the past. How much he wanted to hear her speak before when they were younger knowing there was so much beyond the surface that she offered, but hated when she stopped. He knew it would hurt, but he had this distinct feeling she had been holding this pain for so much more longer to the point of how it festered there.

"The nightmare comes when you find her sleeping with other guys. See I wasn't surprised even as I laid at home after coming from the hospital. I couldn't say anything to you though because I have been hurting for such a long time." A tear escaped her eye then. "Such an incredibly long time. When I eventually came to school again even though you stopped talking to me. Stopped looking at me even I had to force myself to stop looking your way too."

Arnold felt stabbed in the heart there.

"She is correct there. Lila. You didn't delete her information because there was still something there between you both. That is why you didn't fight off her advances. That is why you didn't tell her to leave the party when you first saw her. You did a far better job at fighting off me than her every fucking day since the day you fucking laid eyes on her." Helga couldn't maintain her calm anymore. "I may of fucking hated her. I may of saw through her Miss Perfect act from the get go, but when I saw you upset I did want to comfort you because I hated that look in your eyes."

"Helga, I..."

Flying up from the bench quickly she turned around to look at him directly in the eyes with her very red rimmed eyes. "You have been wanting me to speak since we were 9, here it is." Taking a deep breath she prayed she didn't start crying till she was home. "Before I continue in what I'm saying to you, Arnold, I want to make you know how much you have always meant to me. ALWAYS. True you have helped me in the past, but you ignored me for the largest portion of my existence all in favor of something far better. Those cardboard cutouts you chase around so much, the ones that hurt you to the point you sit there crying about it because they never valued you ever. Me, I valued you with every fiber of my existence. My family life was shitty. Constantly ignored. You know what that does to a person? It drives you to kill yourself at a certain point, but before than you do something to protect yourself and for me I became something I hated. Did you think I enjoyed being a bully? No! I hated it."

Cursing a lone tear that fell from her eye, she pretended it wasn't there as she kept speaking. "I did meet a kind boy when I was 3 and then later Phoebs. Phoebe has never strayed from my side. Oh I know I've irritated her in the past, but I can't live without that girl. I'll do anything in the world for her." She almost laughed at saying her best friends name because how her tears shifted into something different at the thought of her. "All those times I helped you in the past is because I really wanted to. It felt good to. When you demanded me to talk after finding out I was Deep Voice well I know I scared you."

Arnold saw how she shook her head at him and he had this fear build inside him. He was breathing even more deeply now. Helga will always be formidable.

Helga didn't mean to start baring her teeth, but she was feeling that old anger in her. That old rejection. "I know you wanted me to take my confession back. I saw the nervousness in your eyes. That hopefulness. It already hurt the second you did that even if I acted otherwise. I just know if I was one of your other cardboard girls, mostly LI-la confessing to you that night, you would be all over them in a second. You would of put them in your arms and be holding hands with them in the schoolyard. BUT since it was me..." This time she allowed the tears to glide down her face. "It made me feel like pond scum. Yes I helped in San Lorenzo because it meant something to you, but didn't you pay attention at all to me when I started to drift away? No, you didn't." Sniffling she eyed her book bag quickly. "I couldn't take it anymore. I know you noticed that Phoebe was angry at you for a while."

He did, but Phoebe kept her mouth shut.

"I told her to keep speaking to you. She was starting to go out with Gerald by that time and I never wanted anything to be awkward between any of you. For me when I saw you stop asking about me or stop looking at me or even try to speak to me. I knew I was nothing to you." Helga sniffed. "I tried to kill myself for plenty of reasons. Funny that in the end after dying twice, I have this now incredible relationship with my folks and Olga. Though I needed to stop forgetting about other things and focus on myself. It was the best thing for me. Finally love myself. If I end up alone I know I truly won't be, not with my family and Phoebe in my life."

"Helga..."

She refused to let him speak. Refused to let him weaken her right now with a pitiful excuse about that bitch. "No! I'm going back to the Lila subject. When you showed me my number on your phone I was shocked. Flattered. Elated even that you kept my number after all this time." Helga's tone of voice turned emotionless. "I bet that is the exact way that person you deemed your dream girl felt when she saw your text about that party." Reaching for her book bag, she quickly added. "How nice to be placed in the same category as that piece of scum. Thanks for that."

Tears now streaming down her face, Helga ran quickly out of the park feeling thankful when a stream of bicyclists came by just a second after to block Arnold's path as he called out her name to her retreating form.

Helga took her car to her house telling her parents that she'll be at Phoebe for an hour or two. From there she ran so quickly to Phoebe's house that the moment her petite friend answered the door she had fresh tears streaming down her face as Phoebe quickly grabbed her hand to haul her inside. In her bedroom, Helga was curled up with her head resting on her lap as she continued crying telling her exactly what she said to Arnold.

Phoebe knew it was time she told Arnold. So many times even she wanted to yell at him for being so daft because he was so into helping everyone, but the one person who needed help the most was drowning.

For Arnold he slowly dragged himself to Gerald's and sat there in his room as he told him everything that Helga said to him. Gerald listened to every word already knowing a lot of things as it was when it came to Helga.

"What do you think, Gerald?"

He knew he wanted to hear the truth from Gerald. "I'll be honest with you, Helga is right in everything that she feels."

Burying his head in his hands, Arnold felt all his past hope slip away. He failed her. "Did you know any of this?"

To lie or to tell the truth? Gerald decided on the truth. "Not every single bit of it, but yeah since I was still friends with her. Seriously you did decide to forget her one day, and here you are at lunch saying you had these feelings. What is up with that?"

"My stupidity and the ever present Lila."

Gerald glanced to his best friend. "Sorry then to tell you the bad news, you just probably thought about who would suddenly be the best person for you and Helga popped into your mind, but since you still never bothered to approach her until this year..." He let the thought linger on so it can drift into his friend's thick skull.

"I am dense." Arnold muttered out.

Finally she hashes it out to him.