The Doctor ran from the baby's room relieved when Martha didn't follow him. Making it to his room, he slammed the door behind him locking himself in. He went over to his bed sitting down on it as he caught his breath. He didn't want to think of setting up a room for the child, or anything to do with the child but Martha was right. Even if he didn't want to keep the child, he had no clue what he was going to do with the baby once it was born. The safest choice was to keep the baby aboard the TARDIS with him, raising and teaching it until it was old enough to defend itself. He didn't want to keep the baby, though and was determined to find a home that he could leave the child at. Regardless of what he chose, Martha or whoever the baby went to would need to know about the baby's heritage.
Going over to his desk, he took a seat before pulling over a stack of paper. He didn't think about the child as he began to write, describing what he knew about the Crespallions. He had met them once before when he was in his previous body and they had skin so dark that it looked almost painted on. The one that had sired the child had skin that was almost pale blue compared to some of the others. All of the Crespallions had yellowish green eyes and black hair. He couldn't say what the child would look like, though, as he didn't know who genes would dominate. They had a lower body temperature than Time Lord's but not by much, averging 14 degrees celsius rather than 15 like his. Moving to a new sheet of paper, he told her everything that she needed to know about Time Lords, including how his energy worked. He wasn't sure if the baby would need the energy, nor was he sure that the baby would be a touch telepath as the Crespallions weren't. In fact, the more he wrote, the more he realized he didn't know what to expect with this child. If anyone could figure it out, though, it was Martha so he continued to write telling her everything that she needed to know. By the time he finished writing, he had filled several pages but he wasn't done. Taking the pages with him, he went to the medi-bay. There he had the TARDIS help him to draw and label the anatomy of both a Time Lord and Crespallion male.
Finishing, he stifled a yawn as he collected the papers. There was still more to write including the medications both species could take, known allergies and other information that he thought Martha could research on her own. He started to stand up, but paused as he flipped quickly through his notes speed reading them. Realizing that he forgot something, he quickly sat back down. When he read her notes earlier in the day, he had been horrified to read about how she thought the baby was going to get out of his body and he needed to make sure that she knew that he wasn't going to give birth without surgery. Flipping to a clean piece of paper as he made sure to notate that he was going to need a c-section in order to safely deliver his child. Satisfied, he picked up his papers heading back to his room. Stopping off at the library first, he dropped off the papers on her desk before continuing on his way.
He showered, once more scrubbing his skin raw before changing into a clean pair of pajamas. Climbing into his bed, he drifted quickly off to sleep. He wasn't sure if it was because of the writings that he did that day or because of Martha forcing him to think about the child, but his dreams were plagued with the blue man. Once more, he was forced to relive the awful event that caused the child to be growing in his abdomen. Waking up with a scream on his lips, he got quickly out of bed. No longer wanting to be alone, he stumbled his way out of his room and into Martha's bed. She didn't tell him to go, nor did she judge him as rolled over taking him into her arms. He couldn't stop the tears over what the man did to him. He sobbed as he just wished that he could go back in time and stop himself from landing on the planet. He wasn't foolish enough to cross his own timeline, though. Still, for just a moment, he allowed himself the selfish thought of doing so.
He wasn't sure when he drifted off to sleep, but he awoke before Martha. Carefully extracting himself from her arms, he ran from her room. He didn't stop running until he was back in his room. Going over to his desk, he pulled out two sheets of paper. Despite Martha pushing him to keep the child and the fact that he knew she was right, he had made up his mind. He wrote two letters, folding one inside the other. He dressed for the day, putting the letters in the inside pocket of his jacket. Despite being ready for the day, though, he wasn't ready to face Martha. Not yet. Instead, he opened his closet staring at himself in the full-length mirror. He hated his body and the way it had grown fat to give the child room. He hated it almost as much as he disliked the fact that he was carrying the child. Except, for the next few months he had to convince Martha otherwise. He was going to set up a room for the child, follow her advice and do everything possible to convince her that he had changed his mind. That he wanted this child growing inside his abdomen and maybe one day he would actually believe it. He doubted it, though, as he didn't think he could ever except this child as his own. Taking a deep breath, he closed the door before leaving the room and heading to the kitchen to start his day.