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Always There

Danny made his way down the familiar corridor not bothering to pause to knock when he reached the room he was looking for.

Matt glanced up from where he was sat in the corner, with his laptop in front of him. "Hey."

"Hey..." Danny replied, taking a seat across from him. "The know the show doesn't start up for another 4 weeks...You don't need to work."

"I'm not working." Matt said, his eyes scanning the screen in front of him.

"What you doing then?" Danny frowned.

"Just checking the internet."

Danny sighed. "Matt, don't drive yourself crazy..."

"Have you been on the show's message board lately... its jammed with fans trying to find out what's going on..."

"Matt, I really don't think this is helping..."

"People thinks the shows been cancelled... there's a petition with 20112 signatures that people are signing to save the show."

"Well, the show doesn't need saving..." Danny commented, leaning forwards to close the computer.

Matt looked at him. "They don't know that."

"They will soon." Danny stated. "Jordan is working on something to tell them."

"She's been working on something to tell them since before the show ended." Matt rolled her eyes.

"She's had a lot on her mind at the moment, with the baby and everything else..." Danny replied. "Give her a break."

"Sorry, I didn't mean anything..." Matt rubbed his eyes. "I just hate all of this."

"Don't worry about it..."

"Can't not worry about it." He said. "This is all my fault..."

"Matt..."

"If I wasn't so stupid none of this would be happening..."

"Look, it's not a problem... only a few people know what's really going on, everyone else thinks it because of me." Danny told him. "It will work out, I promise."

"I don't want them to think it's because of you."

"What do you want then?"

"To tell them the truth."

"Matt, believe me this is best way." Danny assured him. "The press won't leave you alone if they knew the truth."

"I don't care." He mumbled.

"But I do." Danny answered. "I'm trying to look out for you, okay...I don't know how long I'll be able too..."

"Danny, don't..." Matt groaned standing up and walking over to the window.

"We have to talk about this sometime..." Danny turned in his chair to look at the back of him. "You do know there won't be a 4am miracle this time, don't you?"

Matt continued to stare out the window into the gardens. He didn't want to think about it. Not yet, anyway, he had been doing so well and thinking about this just made him feel so scared and alone.

"Matt, you do..."

"Yes, Danny...I know." He whispered, cutting in to stop him from repeating himself.

"Good." Danny nodded slightly, looking down at his hands. He decided to leave it at that for the time being. Matt would be able to leave the rehab centre in the next week or so...they can talk about it then.

Matt turned to face him. "Things were ever meant to turn out this bad."

"Well, there are some things we just can't help..."

"How can you be so calm about all of this?"

"I'm not calm, Matt..." He shook his head slightly. "Everything that is going on, is scaring the hell out of me."

Matt sighed and turned back to the window again, guilt washing over him.

"What?" Danny questioned at his reaction.

"I should be there for you..."

"What do you mean?" Danny frowned.

"I should have been there for you...I should be now..."

"Matt..." Danny stood up and walked over to him. "It doesn't matter..."

"Of course it matters, Danny!" He spun around again to look at him. "I've screwed up!"

"You forgetting who you're talking to..." Danny joked slightly. "The amount of times I've screwed up and you were there for me..."

"This is different..." Matt replied.

"How?"

"I don't know...It just is."

"Look, Matt...just concentrate on yourself, yeah?" Danny said softly. "I can manage everything else..."

"But..."

"But nothing...I can handle all of this..." Danny told him. "And I know that at some point I'm going to get so sick and not be able to do anything but right now...I'm okay..."

Matt turned and looked at him once more. "I just don't want to let you down, more then I have done already."

"Matt, you haven't let me down...You made a mistake but I've been there, remember...I understand."

Matt sighed quietly and nodded.

"Right, so lets talk about something else." Danny suggested. "Everything will be okay."

"I hope you're right." Matt mumbled.

XxXxX

He was early, he knew he would there before anyone else and that's the reason why. He sat in his office, looking around, it felt good to be back. He was nervous about facing everyone after what had happened. He didn't know what to expect. Danny had told him that everyone had agreed to keep what happened quiet but he really wished they hadn't been there that night when he freaked out.

He tensed and looked up when there was a knock on the door.

"Hey..." Harriet smiled slightly from the doorway.

"Hi." He replied.

"I thought you might be here early." She said, walking into the room slowly. "I got coffee."

He smiled. "You know me to well."

She returned the smile as she handed him a cup. "So, how you doing?"

"Okay, I guess..." He shrugged. "I feel like an idiot."

She looked down into her own coffee for a moment before looking up at him. "I'm sorry I didn't come and see you sooner."

"It's okay..." He started.

"I wanted to but I didn't think it was a good idea."

"Harri, it doesn't matter... the clinic doesn't really allow people to visit, they weren't to happy about Danny coming in."

"I guess no one can keep you two apart..." She joked and Matt laughed quietly but then frowned slightly when he thought about Danny's illness. "Sorry, I didn't mean..."

"It's okay." Matt stopped her. "Anyway, I was saying... they didn't like visitors and then once I got out...i went home and spent time with my family and stuff.."

"Did you tell them?" Harriet asked.

Matt looked down. "No."

"Oh...Well, that's probably for the best..."

"I hate lying to everyone." He looked up at her. "I hate that people think the show was put on hold because of Danny being ill..."

"Matt, he's trying to look out for you." Harriet told him softly. "He knows what it's like for everyone to know you're business..."

"I know but after everything, he shouldn't be protecting me... I don't deserve him too."

"Matt, you didn't do anything wrong...you were struggling and made mistakes...it just proves your human..." Harriet answered. "And I know I feel guilty about not noticing what was going on with you...I bet you Danny feels the same."

"I don't want any of you to feel guilty."

"Well, there's nothing you can do about it." She replied and smiled slightly, taking his hand. "And there's nothing you can do about Danny protecting you because no matter what, he will..."

"I know."

"So, come on.. lets try and forget everything and concentrate on putting on a great show." She squeezed his hand gently.

He smiled at her again. "Yeah, okay..."

XxXxX

Matt was already working on a sketch idea when Danny walked into the office.

"Hey, you took your time." Matt commented but didn't stop typing.

"I went to breakfast with Jordan." Danny shrugged, taking a seat; not at all bothered by the fact he was late. "Good to be back?"

"Oh yeah."

"Really?"

This time Matt looked up at him. "It's good to have things back to normal."

"Yeah it is." He agreed. "But promise me that everything starts to get to much or anything, that you'll talk to me..."

"Danny..."

"I mean it, Matt." Danny stated. "Because if you do anything like that again, I won't hesitate in kicking your ass!"

He smiled slightly. "I know..and I won't."

"You won't what?"

"I won't let things get on top of me like that again..." He promised. "I never want to feel like that again."

"Good."

"And there's something I want to tell you..."

Danny frowned in concern. "What?"

"Our contracts are only for 2 years, right?"

"Yeah because once they've expired, I'll be able to direct your movie..." He stated. "Or I would have been able to if..."

"I'm not going to do the movie." Matt cut in before he could finish the sentence.

"What do you mean?"

"I can't do it without you." Matt shook his head.

"Matt, it's a great script!" Danny claimed.

"I don't think I can handle it, Danny..." He stated. "I mean, it's only another year until our contracts end...It'll be too soon."

"So, what are you going to do then?" He questioned.

"I'll talk to Jack and Jordan...hopefully I can get my contract renewed."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I meant it when I said this place feels like home." He claimed.

"That's great, Matt..."

"You don't seem to convince..." Matt replied.

"Look, I'd like nothing more for you to be here with Harriet, Cal, Jordan and everyone else..."

"But..." Matt predicted.

"But it's not going to be the same..." Danny claimed. "And I don't want you only staying here just so you can hang on a little tighter to the past."

"Is wanting to remember such a bad thing?" Matt sighed.

"No but holding yourself back is." Danny told him. "I want you to go out there and live your life to the fullest...I only want the best for you Matt."

There was silence as Matt thought about what Danny said.

"Wow, when did we do emotionally conversations." Matt joked, breaking the silence after a few seconds.

Danny smiled, knowing Matt was trying to lighten the atmosphere. "I guess, we've never been good at that."

"I guess not." Matt replied, standing up. "I better go down to the writers room, see what ideas they've got."

"Want me to come with you?" Danny asked, standing to.

"Why?"

"Well, it'll be the first time you've seen them since that night..." Danny stated as he followed Matt out of the office.

"I know but I think this is something I need to do alone."

"You sure?" He asked.

"Yeah, I'm sure..."

"Okay, well I'll be in my office if you need anything." Danny patted his shoulder before turning to walk away. "Oh, and remember we got the press release in an hour."

"Oh that's going to be so much fun." He said sarcastically. "Everyone is going to want to know why the show went on hiatus earlier...and why there has been no explanation."

"Don't worry about it...It'll be fine."

"Okay, whatever..." Matt said as he walked off.

"Think about what I said okay?" Danny called back.

"Yeah..." Matt replied quietly with a sigh.

TBC

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