The unsent letter
I wrote him a letter, Morgana suggested I should, which I never gave. I didn't need to. But I'll tell that story after:
Dear Merlin,
I've been thinking. I can't stop. About that day. It had been such a normal day. 'Each to their own thoughts' as Gaius always says.
Then Arthur and Gwen returned and Gwen came in and broke mine apart to everyone – well, Arthur and Morgana. But not you. I don't think you know; unless… Arthur! That must have been what he took you to the side for. That I didn't hear. That you never told me about.
Gwen said…she said that she can see you like me, yes that happens to everyone. It's called friendship. "It's the way he acts around you, and you get on so well too. I know he'll come clean soon" Could it be true? Could she have just seen how I feel and said it just to make me feel better? Am I that obvious?
Gwen. I can exactly why she fell for you and Arthur to tell you the truth. I mean come on. If it were all about looks Arthur would win hands down, but I don't care about that, well, the small fact of what he did (the stocks) put me off him forever.
Anyway, Arthur's got only one good trait – he cares about his people, but apart from that he's an arrogant and insensitive little..."ass" as you put it.
You on the other hand, you care about everyone, you're happy to help anyone in trouble no matter if your life may be in danger. You have so much faith in Arthur, I don't know why: he treats you awfully and why you let him, I'll probably never know.
I just wish Gwen was right. I...I just don't want to say anything to you. I don't want to say anything to you. But...Merlin, I love you.