"It looks good Chris. What do you think?" Lita asked as they stood in front of the mirror of the tattoo shop. Chris had his back turned looking over his newly decorated back.

"It is what it is." Chris remarked dryly before pulling on his shirt. "Sorry, I shouldn't have said it like that." He reached out and took her hand in his. "I admit I'm a little hurt that you can just turn things between us off just like a dripping faucet. Tell me you don't feel more."

"Chris, it doesn't matter what I feel I'm committed to my relationship with CJ."

He raised an all-knowing brow. "Committed or stuck?"

"Committed!" She shouted before her face turned a crimson color. Li threw down a wad of bills and stormed out of the shop.

He wished he could take it all back. Take back the feelings he had for her. Take back the pain he had caused her. And most of all take back the angry words that seemed to fly from his mouth with such an ease. Chris found her on the boardwalk propped against the railing. Her back was to him but he could see the tension in her body. He wasn't sure how to approach her or what to say to rectify the situation. He just knew he couldn't let her slip away.

"I'm sorry Li. I didn't mean it like that."

She turned around to face him, tears evident in her hazel eyes. "No, I'm sorry. I can't believe I let this happen. I can't be with you and you know it."

He wiped away a fallen tear. "Baby, Jericho's not good enough for you. Let me take care of you and take away your pain. You know I love you Li."

Her eyes grew big and her heart ached. "That's not fair Chris. We've been friends for too long and now everything is tainted. I've lost you as a lover and a friend because I can't leave Jericho. I just can't."

He took her hand in his. "In a perfect world would you want to be with me Lita?"

"It's not a perfect world."

"Answer me Li. Please."

She looked away willing herself to be strong. "Yes."

He pulled her into an embrace and held her tight. "That's all I need to know. And I want you to know that I'm here for you if you ever need me. I'm still your friend Li."

Benoit turned his back on her and walked away. Each step was like a knife to his heart. His own eyes watered and he punched a wall in passing drawing blood from his knuckles.

She watched as he walked away leaving her standing alone on the boardwalk. Tears streaming down her cheeks. She wanted to run after him, to tell him that she loved him too. However, she stayed glued in that spot until he was out of sight. She owed it to Jericho to work on their relationship. And she knew it had probably just cost her a lifetime of love.

------------------------------------------

She turned into the driveway wishing for once that Jericho wouldn't be there but his SUV was sitting there indicating that he was indeed home. She turned off the ignition and rested her head against the seat. She was crazy for even thinking about Benoit but he was on her mind heavily. She couldn't seem to shake the way he made her feel.

Li bit back all the emotion she was feeling and headed inside to face her fiancé.

Jericho was in their bedroom packing for the next round of shows. Lita stood in the doorway watching him for a moment before she spoke. "Hey are you getting a head start on your packing?"

"Baby, Vince needs me to fly out in the morning for a photo shoot for the magazine. He's hyping my return and may even put me on the cover."

"Oh." Her head dropped in disappointment and she walked over and sat on the edge of the bed. "You just got here, we just got engaged. When can we take some time for ourselves?"

He reached over and squeezed her hand. "We will babe. It's just now I really need to focus on my comeback."

"What happened to putting us first? I thought that's why you decided to come back to WWE."

He took a deep breath to calm the agitation he was feeling now. "I am putting us first. Look at the rock on your finger. That is putting us first. Do you just expect me to give up everything for you?"

"Not everything Chris! But I do expect you to at least pretend you want to spend some quality time with me."

"Quality time? This would be quality time if you weren't so busy bitching and complaining."

Lita couldn't control the anger that was setting in. "Fuck you!" She screamed before practically running out of the room. She grabbed her purse and left.

----------------------------------

Lita drove a few miles down the road before she had to pull into a parking lot and let the tears flow freely. Sometimes Chris could be a complete and total heartless jerk. She found herself wondering why she stayed and realized she had been asking herself that question a lot more as of late.

Lita's cell phone rang and she picked it up, careful to look at the caller id before answering. It was Chris. She laid the phone down and rested her head on the steering wheel. She found her thoughts escaping back to the other night with Benoit.

Benoit made her feel things deep inside and he stirred her emotions with a simple look. He was everything Jericho wasn't. She loved Jericho but no one could fault her for wanting to be with Benoit. For the moment, she was busy pondering if it would be so wrong to keep seeing Benoit on the side.

Lita found herself wishing she could escape the madness that had become her life.