Armin and Annie went out together a few more times before he decided to seek for help.
They both had a wonderful time, as far as he could tell. They went to Springer's one more time with Eren and Mikasa, they ate and went people-watching in the mall, they held hands and walked around the snowy park, and they had dinner at his apartment again. But when she refused to talk about this 'she' person inside her or her father or deceased mother, he made the decision to look for assistance.
He really didn't want to do this, but she left him no choice. It really hurt him to see her like this: so alone, so cold, so abandoned. He tried everything to let her know that it was okay to let people in, that he was there for her no matter what, but ever since that night, she declined any serious discussion about herself or her past.
What also pushed him over the edge is when she didn't want to go over to his grandfather's place for Christmas. She had nowhere to go and nothing to do on that day but still didn't accept his invitation. On Christmas day, he frequently went up to the front window and peered out to search for her, hoping she'd show up. But she didn't. He saw her the next day in their alleyway and asked her what she did on that holiday. She claimed she sat inside a Chinese restaurant until they kicked her out back into the snow. When he felt his heart break at her response, he decided to look for professional help.
Without Annie's permission.
On the first day of the spring semester, Armin stopped by Professor Hanji's office. He knocked on the open door and peered inside. "Professor Hanji?"
He caught sight of the wavy haired teacher taping a sheet of notes to her wall, along with other sheets of paper and various pictures of pink brains and the depressed faces of what looked like mental patients. Her head whipped around at the sound of his voice, chocolate locks flying around her. A smile stretched from ear to ear when she recognized Armin. "Armin! Holy shit it's great to see you!"
A hand flew to her mouth at the curse she accidently slipped and she giggled loudly. "Oops! Don't tell Professor Smith I said that. But oh my gosh, Armin! I haven't seen you in like a month. How are your classes? Come in, come in."
He did as he was told, closing the door behind him. "Hi, Professor Hanji. It's great to see you too. I have to admit, I miss your psychology class."
"I do too. All I'm teaching this semester is chemistry and forensics. No psychology! I'm going to go insane!" She laughed. "Ha, ha! Ahh, psychology humor."
"Professor Hanji, can I ask you a few questions? I actually came on a pretty serious matter."
"Oh, yeah. Of course. You can ask me anything. Here, take a seat." She hurriedly removed a small pile of papers on one of the chairs at her desk and set them to the side. Armin lowered himself into the chair as Hanji rushed around the messy desk (piled high with papers to grade, files of mental patients, and empty mugs of caffeine drinks). She fell into her spinning chair and placed her elbows on the desk, body leaned forward in interest.
"So Armin, what's going on?"
"Well…" He rubbed the back of his neck. "It's a long story and a little complex to explain."
"Then we're off to a great start!" She clapped her hands together once, voice jumping in enthusiasm. "The best things in life are often the most complex and filled with endless details. So, please, tell me everything."
Armin grinned. "Okay. Um, back in November, I met this girl—"
Hanji immediately interrupted with a high-pitched squeal and clutched fists. "Ooh! I know where this is going! Please tell me this has led you to having a girlfriend!"
"Uh…" Should he label Annie that? They have been going out for a couple months now but neither of them have actually uttered the word "boyfriend" or "girlfriend". He shrugged shyly. "I guess you could say that."
"YES!" The ponytailed woman raised her fists in the air victoriously. "I was hoping this day would come! You are so intelligent and generous and brave and one of the best students I've ever had. You deserve to have a special girl in your life."
"Uh, thanks…but I came here to discuss her actually. I'm afraid she's not…okay." He didn't know the right word to explain Annie's condition; he wasn't a doctor or a professor—he couldn't diagnose her with anything. He was afraid to use words like "unstable" or "mentally ill".
Hanji's fists lowered, her facial features changed to looks of worry. "Really? You think something's wrong with her mentally?"
"I think so. A while back, she told me that there's someone inside her who's telling her to do bad things and to stay away from people, me specifically. She won't tell me the things she's done or who this person is exactly but I have a feeling she's only getting worse at this rate."
Hanji frowned, thinking to herself. "A person inside her…doing terrible things…keeping to herself as much as possible. Hmm…explain her behavior. Is she violent or reckless?"
"Not that I've seen. She's very built though—she also told me that her father has trained her for as long as she can remember. She's definitely capable of causing damage but she hasn't hurt me or anyone near her…yet."
"If I may ask, she's your girlfriend, correct? So has she ever react strangely or push you away when you try to get close?"
His eyes drifted to the floor. "Yes. She'll tense up and then eventually move away." He looked back up. "But she hasn't hurt me. I don't think she'd do that."
"Do you know much on her family history? Their behaviors or mental health?"
"No. I just know that her mother died in childbirth and her father was pretty tough on her while growing up; he was, or is, a drinker. I don't know if he's addicted or what."
Hanji was quiet for a second, something she always did when pondering decisions. "What's her name?"
"Annie Leonhart. She's not a student here. She's actually…living on the streets." Again, Armin felt hesitant telling his professor this. He knew it was for the best but he hated feeling like he was betraying Annie somehow.
The professor widened her eyes behind her thick glasses at this. "Really? That's not…good. That's not healthy at all."
Armin nodded in agreement.
"Well…" Hanji tapped her fingers against her desk, staring intensely at a short pencil in one of her drained coffee mugs. "Well, I'm sure you know that I'm a doctor at the psychology ward in the Rose Hospital." Armin nodded again. "So, if you don't mind, can we set up an appointment with Annie there? I can't claim anything without solid proof if there's something wrong with her. She can get a CAT scan and I'll ask her a few questions and maybe we can contact her father on some more information."
Armin's tense shoulders dropped a little. He trusted Hanji enough to be careful with Annie and to not interrogate her like a bad cop. He smiled at her. "Yes, that would be great. Thank you so much, Professor Hanji. I'll get back to you whenever I see Annie next."
"No." Hanji smiled back. "Thank you Armin, for your brilliant brain and careful intentions."
Armin invited Annie back to his apartment that weekend and he was glad when she accepted. He decided to not blurt out Hanji's suggestion first thing when they stepped through the front door but instead, they enjoyed some chicken noodle soup and watched some TV for an hour. After the end to some criminal mystery show came, Armin turned off the TV and tapped Annie's shoulder. "Annie, I need to tell you something."
She was sitting cross legged on the sofa and quietly changed her position so she faced him fully. "What is it?"
He smiled at her and turned to her, holding both in her hands in his. "How are you doing?"
"I'm fine." He realized that she said that way too often; she never said "good" or "well" or "alright". It was always "I'm fine".
"Well, that's…fine, I suppose." He studied her hands, still white and bony but possessed the strength of a thousand men. The cuffs of her sweatshirt ran to her knuckles and he wondered if that was intentional.
Everything was quiet for a moment. "Are you okay?" came along Annie, sounding curious.
"I'm okay, yes." Geez, this was harder than when he asked her out on their first date. Well, of course it should be harder; this was about her mental state, her unstable brain. He sighed. "Um, h-have you ever been to a hospital before?"
She shook her head slowly. "No. I don't like them. They pick and poke at you and try to fix you even though they don't know you."
He swallowed. "But you know they're there to help you, right?"
She paused. "I guess. But I prefer to deal with things by myself."
Another sigh escaped him. "But sometimes we need help from other people. Sometimes the problem is too big for us to deal with by ourselves."
He felt Annie's stare on him. "What are you trying to say, Armin? Don't try to turn this into some sort of puzzle."
He looked back up at her, observed the blonde hair curtaining her eyes and super pale lips frowning in annoyance. He gulped. It's for the best, he told himself.
"Annie, I-I've talked to one of my professors at school. She's a psychology teacher and a doctor at Rose Hospital. I've told her about you and she would like you to set up an appointment with her at the hospital. All she wants to do is ask a few questions and get a CAT scan—it's a procedure where they basically take a picture of your brain for reference." He bit his lips nervously. "Annie, I think you should do this."
What was actually a few seconds felt like eons to Armin. Annie stared at Armin's face for a bit silently before she parted her lips and whispered, "What?"
He closed his eyes. "Annie, it's for the best. I'm worried that—"
"You told a doctor about me? About my personal life?"
He squeezed her hands desperately. "Yes and I'm so sorry for it. I really am. I felt like I was betraying you and it made me sick to my stomach. But this is to make you feel better because…" He paused, attempting to blink away the tears forming at the edge of his vision. "…because I know you're not okay."
Annie looked at his eyes and then very slowly and dangerously her eyebrows shifted downward. "You think I'm crazy…"
His hands flew up to her face, cupping her white cheeks. "No, I don't! I swear! I just think you need help—"
She ripped her face away from him like his fingers were made of fire. "I trusted you…"
He could feel something deep within him shattering and it came with a pain like he never felt before. He figured this was what heartbreak felt like. "Annie—"
"No." She spat the word at him and flung up from her spot on the couch. Her eyes were like daggers and her lips curled back in a sinister sneer. He tensed up. This was not the Annie he knew. This was someone else.
"I'm not going anywhere near that hospital. I'm not crazy and neither is my father—"
"I didn't accuse your—"
"Shut up, you traitor. I trusted you enough with my personal life and you spread it among other people who I don't even know. I can't believe you'd do such a thing to me! How dare you, Armin Arlert, tell me what I should and should not do. This is my life, not yours! I'm not your responsibility so stop caring about me so fucking much!" She shook her head in fury and stomped over to the front door.
Despite her harsh words, Armin was quick on his feet and grabbed Annie's arm before she could reach the doorknob. "Annie! Wait a sec—" And then he felt fire on his left cheek.
Annie's hand came so quick and struck so hard that it caused a little spittle of blood to spew out of Armin's mouth. Her slap left him speechless as his ocean blue eyes stared at the floor.
"I never want to see you again," was what snarled from Annie's mouth before she flung open the door and slammed it shut with all her might, forcing some cups on the kitchen counter to wobble a bit.
Armin stayed like that for what seemed like forever, just staring hopelessly at the carpeted floor beneath him, like it held all the answers. When he heard cars honking outside his window and saw the room around him grow darker is when he let his tears roll freely down his face, falling to his knees and clutching his stupid brain in his hands.
