Disclaimer: I don't own the stuff, I just watch. I do intend to own the world someday though. No, not rule it; just own it. I'll leave the actual work to the little sis, Topo.
Warning: Kya ha ha ha!! Almost there! Now for random typos! Siuha98hi8sdnfh8! Sdjhfll hdjso weuiyfbn f0!
----------------------------------------------
Souken no ShibunKenshin in a Kimono!
----------------------------------------------
Kyouki and Yahiko stared at each other.
Just stared. Nothing more. Nothing less.
Kyouki's left eye twitched slightly. Yahiko's nostrils flared. Yet still nothing happened.
Someone's hand brushed against the dojo floor, but neither searched the sound out to see which of them produced it. Somewhere outside, a shoji was opened and closed. However, Kyouki and Yahiko never moved an inch. There came the scraping of steps on the path to the dojo, but still they did not inspect the origin of the sound.
Kaoru slid the door aside to find this scene. She arched an eyebrow, curious as to what they were doing. Or weren't doing, as it were. Yahiko was facing Kaoru's direction, a determined look on his face, while Kyouki had her back turned. Neither moved, twitched, or even gave the tiniest sign of noticing her. Even as she moved forward, making herself readily visible to both, still they gave no recognition of her presence. The two of them just sat there, staring each other quietly.
She could still see the resolved look on Yahiko's face, though whatever it was they were doing, Kyouki apparently did not mirror him. Rather, she appeared calm and serene. Not that Kaoru actually cared what was going on with the two at the moment. All she wanted was their attention long enough to inform them that she and Kenshin were leaving. But with both refusing to even look at her, she'd have to do something. Being that Kyouki was a guest and injured, not to mention Yahiko was in trouble anyways, he was Kaoru's chosen target.
She stalked over and bent down low enough to bring her mouth level with Yahiko's ear. She took a deep breath and noticed a slight tensing of his posture as she did so. She grabbed a hold of his ear and pulled him closer. "Kenshin and I are going to market now. Try not to tear up the place while I'm gone, Yahiko-CHAN!" she veritably screamed in the boy's captured ear.
He screeched painfully and jerked away from her, holding the victimized body part. He rolled back and hopped to his feet, a glare already in place. "What the hell did you do that for, BUSU?!"
Kaoru shrugged. "You weren't paying attention to me." She gestured towards Kyouki who now wore a triumphant grin. "Just what were you two doing?"
Yahiko opened his mouth, already preparing to yell, when he too noticed the grin. "Dammit! Now look what you've done. You made me lose."
Kaoru blinked, then realization struck. "You were having a staring contest?"
Kyouki's grin widened. "Keyword being 'were'." She looked up at Kaoru. "Thanks to you, I just won." She had only just started to cackle when her face connected with the floor.
"Baka!" Kaoru turned away and started heading back out. "I'm leaving now."
The shoji closed behind her and Kyouki picked herself up off the floor, Yahiko's snickers filling her ears. "Hush, brat! At least I won." His eyes narrowed and he plopped himself back down in front of her.
"Again."
******************************************************
The market was unusually crowded, much to Kenshin's chagrin. At least, it seemed that way to him. Kaoru, on the other hand, apparently thought nothing of the extra people crowded around them as she continued to push her way through them. Kenshin wondered if it was normal for people to be staring at him that much. He usually didn't pay attention, but being dressed in the kimono made him feel self-conscious. He could swear he was getting looks even more lecherous than the one Kyouki had given him earlier… and most of them weren't from women.
The stares from the women made him uncomfortable, but the looks he kept getting from the men made him downright scared. He was convinced one of them was going to try and drag him away from Kaoru into some deserted alley. Not that the fools would make it, but Kenshin was sure they'd try. Kaoru was already dragging him along by his hand, but with each passing second, she had to drag him less and less. Paranoid of the stares, Kenshin kept getting closer to Kaoru. In the less logical part of his mind, Kenshin kept hoping he would somehow melt into her backside thereby avoiding the supposed looks.
He nearly jumped when Kaoru reached back and grabbed his shoulder. "Calm down, Kenshin."
Kenshin nodded calmly enough, but he was pretty sure he'd have hyperventilated by now if it weren't for the kimono constricting his breathing. He managed to dodge a couple hands that finally did come his way, but other than that and the dozens of surely perverted stares, the walk around the marketplace was… loud, hot, and annoying. However, Kaoru seemed happy enough, so he didn't complain when the nice fat man started flirting with him or when a passing young woman pinched his ass. He just huddled closer to Kaoru in the hopes that it would protect him from some of the people.
Kaoru passed a few stalls, only pausing long enough to check over some things. She ended up buying Kenshin a new set of clothes and enough food to feed an army. Kenshin was too busy frantically looking every which way so he never noticed her purchases. Being that the food was a bit much even for both her and Kenshin to carry, she paid a few extra coins to have everything delivered to the dojo instead. If he was hidden behind packages, then no one could see him. If no one could see him, it made all her work pointless. She was slightly put off by the amount of attention he was getting, especially when in comparison to her, but this was what she wanted after all. So she didn't mind. Really she didn't. And stomping on his foot when that girl pinched him was a complete accident. Honest.
After a couple more stops, she finally steered them in the direction of the Akabeko. Kenshin didn't even realize where she was leading him until it was too late. As soon as the smell of food assaulted his nose, he quickly realized his mistake. Not only was Kenshin dressed in a kimono in public, but now he would be in a place where people knew him. He turned to leave, but Kaoru grabbed him by his hair and dragged him the rest of the way in.
Tae greeted them, thankfully ignoring Kenshin's choice of clothing. "Good morning, you two! How are things going?" Kaoru smiled happily and reported any goings on at the dojo that Tae didn't already know about. Kenshin sat quietly behind, eyes flicking from Kaoru to the patrons every once in a while. Tae felt sorry for Kenshin, but she'd help Kaoru if only because she was the only paying customer out of the Kenshin-gumi. Megumi paid, but seeing as her home was now in Aizu, Tae didn't really consider her part of the group anymore. "Kaoru honey, have you seen Yahiko? He was supposed to come in fifteen minutes ago, but he still hasn't shown up and we're swamped."
Kaoru shook her head. "Last I saw him was at the dojo earlier." Tae sighed and Kaoru placed a comforting hand on her friend's shoulder. "I'm sure he'll be here soon, Tae." She then brightened suddenly. "I know! I've got one more place to stop at, but Kenshin could substitute for now." Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Kenshin pale, however he remained quiet. "If Yahiko's not here by the time I get back, I'll go home and drag him here."
Tae turned a hopeful look on Kenshin. "Oh, would you?!"
Kenshin looked between the two women, Kaoru giving him a pleading look and Tae's expression still hopeful, and nodded his agreement. "Hai, Tae-dono. Sessha will help you, de gozaru." Tae thanked him and bowed deeply, before disappearing into the kitchen. She soon returned though, carrying an apron, which she shoved into Kenshin's hands.
"Time to get to work then." She pointed off to the tables in the far corner. "You'll be waiting those tables over there."
Kenshin followed the line of sight back to the specified tables. They were filled with several men and women conversing loudly and shoving food into their mouths. A few unsavory looking ones caught Kenshin's attention and he frowned, already seeing the potential for more leers and pinching. No, today was not a good day for him at all…
******************************************************
Kaoru slipped into the clinic as quietly as she could and searched out the lady doctor. Hopefully, Megumi had gotten her message from Kyouki. Kyouki seemed dependable enough, but when Kaoru had mentioned the woman to Kyouki, she'd gotten a mischievous glint in her eyes. She could only pray that whatever Kyouki did, Megumi wouldn't hold it against Kaoru right now.
She found Megumi in the back office, filing away some of Dr. Genzai's papers. A soft knock on the open shoji was enough to catch the older woman's attention as Kaoru entered the room. "Did you get my message?"
Megumi paused, nodding, and then continued what she was doing. "Yes, I did. I must say the message was rather interesting, although I deplore your choice of carriers." The older woman got a sour look that more than described Megumi's dislike of Kyouki. She looked up, eyeing Kaoru for a moment before smiling. "I've already prepared something…"
******************************************************
Kyouki was staring Yahiko down again.
Yahiko eyed her from beneath his spiky bangs. Seventeen… "Call."
Keeping her eyes trained on Yahiko's face, she reached forward and looked at what she'd grabbed. She growled, setting it down for Yahiko to see. A superior look passed over his face as she made the announcement. "Twenty-four. Bust."
Yahiko reached forward, intending to claim his reward from her when Kyouki's snatched the money pile away from him. "Double or nothing."
Yahiko grinned and nodded. "You're on."
******************************************************
"Kenshin, I need you to take table five's order."
Kenshin, setting some used dishes in one of the sinks, found Tae peering in from the dining room.
"Yahiko's still not here and I had to send Tsubame on an emergency run to the market."
He nodded and she thanked him profusely before heading back to her post at the door of the restaurant. Kenshin sighed and pushed some wrinkles out of his apron. He wrinkled his nose, noticing the stains that had somehow managed to find their way onto the garment. No doubt the result of those overly friendly men he'd served recently. Thankfully, they'd left before Kenshin lost his temper and popped their hands with his serving tray. Although the perverts severely deserved it, he didn't think Tae would be terribly appreciative of his reaction.
Kenshin reached back, tightening the tie in his hair before stepping into the dining area. It wouldn't do to have hair in the nice people's food… Nice, my ass. He pushed the covering on the kitchen door aside and looked around, observing the comings and goings of the patrons. If I had a mind to… I'd… I'd… piss in their soup! Kenshin hung his head, knowing that while he might imagine doing such a thing, he would never actually follow through.
With his bangs covering his eyes, Kenshin made his way desolately to table five. Even though he watched the floor, he was able avoid the furniture and people easily. As he neared the table, he pulled a pad from his sleeve to place the order on. I wonder just how many more people are going to try and grope me today… Upon reaching the table, Kenshin forced a cheerful smile on his face and looked up at the customer. "What would you li-" The question immediately died on his lips, much the way Kenshin wish he could at that moment.
"They say a picture is worth a thousand words," came the amused reply.
Kenshin tensed, his eyes narrowing to angry slits. "What do you want?"
"Some food would be nice, Battousai," one Saito Hajime answered smoothly, a smirk finding its way onto his face. He leaned forward, sliding a cigarette from his pocket and lit it. Kenshin's eye twitched, but he nodded, offering the man a menu. Saito's eyes quickly scanned over it, taking in all the choices within seconds. He took a drag from his cigarette and looked as if he were considering a life or death situation. Kenshin played with the kimono's sleeves as Saito decided, seeming to take an inordinate amount of time to do so.
Kenshin's hand drifted to where his sakabatou would normally be tied. Even though Saito seemed relaxed enough, Kenshin knew it was simply a façade. However, he didn't really expect Saito to start something in the middle of the restaurant. He was just feeling threatened, something he knew was being magnified a thousand fold by his current attire.
"I'll have tori no mizutaki and tea." Kenshin nodded but Saito's voice stopped him short of writing it down. "Wait. Belay that. Oyako-donburi sounds better. Keep the tea." Kenshin raised the pad, only to be brought up short by Saito once again. "Forget the tea. Make it water." Kenshin frowned, getting the distinct feeling that Saito was doing this to him on purpose. Ok, he knew Saito was doing it on purpose, but there wasn't much he could do about it. Except 'flavor' the soup… I think I could make an exception just this once for Mibu's Wolf. Kenshin grinned evilly, eliciting a raised eyebrow from the taller man.
Kenshin wiped the look from his face and gave Saito the most innocent smile he could muster. "Will that be all?" Saito made an affirmitive noise and Kenshin stalked off towards the kitchen to place the order. Saito surely wasn't here without reason, which could only mean bad things to come. That man pursued trouble like… like a wolf tracked its prey. He had to give it to Saito; the man certainly lived up to his namesake. The only times he'd seen Saito in Tokyo though were when the hunt involved Kenshin or something connected to him. Kenshin frowned, finding the connecting puzzle piece. The Nentou…
******************************************************
'Attempts on my life' he says…Sizzle…
'Want you to cook it' he says…Stir…
'Can't be too careful' he says…Crack.
Kenshin looked down to find the wooden spoon he'd been holding was now snapped in two. Not only had Saito entered the kitchen to change his order again, but he'd done so twice now. And he'd asked that Kenshin himself cook it 'just to be sure' no one poisoned his food. Of course, Kenshin was forced to comply for a number of reasons. One being that he was working at the Akabeko for the moment, therefore the paying customer was always right… even if they were annoyingly sadistic. Another was that Saito was a policeman and people preferred not to make any trouble with the police. Kenshin was sure Tae generally included herself among those, so he remained civil rather than trying to throw the man out the door on his ass.
Kenshin had waited a few minutes before beginning the work on Saito's meal, just in case. However, the man had not made another appearance, so Kenshin started on his order. Saito had finally decided upon shabu-shabu and curry. This didn't leave much room for Kenshin to screw up the order. Not that he would have, Kenshin did have his pride after all. He just liked having the choice and Saito hadn't allowed him that. Which meant that upon his return to the wolf's table, he'd have to settle for the traditional 'death glare' approach. Of course, glaring wasn't very effective, but it was somewhat satisfying anyways.
After looking around to make sure no one had spotted the broken utensil he was holding, Kenshin slinked over to an open window and sent the useless thing sailing through. On his way back to the stove, he grabbed another and made sure to put it down this time when he wasn't using it. It would look a little suspicious if more than one of Tae's spoons mysteriously disappeared…
******************************************************
"One…"
Two fists of opposing figures were raised into the air.
"Two…"
Again, they were raised, synchronous in their movement.
"Three…"
The two hands came down for the final time.
"Go."
Yahiko's remained in a fist. Kyouki's hand was now laying flat, palm down. With a whoop of joy, Kyouki stood and started dancing around, cackling obnoxiously all the while. Thus, Yahiko, who was already under the effects of 'underwater' hearing thanks to Kaoru, was now legally deaf. This explained why he never heard Kaoru coming… Strangely, he wasn't her first target though. Apparently, she didn't appreciate Kyouki's raucous laughter either. So he wasn't terribly surprised by the shihondai's presence when he saw Kyouki's limp body go flying across the room into a wall. Kaoru came over to stand beside him and they both waited for her to fall backwards as the minutes ticked by. However, her splayed form remained plastered to the wall so the two quickly lost interest.
Kaoru turned to Yahiko with hands on her hips and stared him down. He stared back for a minute, and then decided the moment was too reminiscent of Kyouki's earlier victory. He yawned and stretched, unconcerned for now with whatever reasons Kaoru was angry with him. "What is it this time?"
Kaoru raised an eyebrow. It was rare that Yahiko was ever late for work at the Akabeko, even rarer still that he would neglect his duties. He was usually all too eager to get away from Kaoru and the 'training' she put him through. It must have been because she'd given him the day off from said training that he'd relaxed enough to forget. Not that she minded terribly. His sudden inability to remember his responsibilities had only furthered her plans. Still, it would seem a bit suspicious to the rather bright child if she weren't angry over his tardiness. So Kaoru very calmly pulled a shinai from the wall and made her way back to Yahiko. Making as it to hand it to the boy, she smacked him over the head with it instead just when his over-reaching put him off-balance. This landed him face first on the floor, muttering and cursing.
He was up in seconds flat though, and pacing before her like an enraged animal. Why he was pacing, she didn't know. Maybe it was his way of keeping his mind off the pain surely spreading throughout his head. Not that it matters, she mentally shrugged, but perhaps something useful to know for later. She paid his mindless ranting no mind and informed him that his presence was overdue at the Akabeko.
Three things then happened simultaneously…
Yahiko's face dropped and he sprinted out the door faster than even Seta Soujiro could blink.
Kyouki's body finally peeled away from the wall and landed on the floor with a quiet plop. Her body had become a jelly like puddle that quickly began to slide it's way to the relative safety of the house.
Kaoru reached forward and snatched up the pile of gambled money, assuring herself that it was morally right to exact payment from the two for misbehaving. Kyouki was a guest and should have acted accordingly. The boy just knew better. She pocketed the coins and took off, following the trail of dust kicked up by the speeding Yahiko. She wondered what his reaction would be to not only finding Kenshin working in his place, but doing so dressed in a kimono… Rather than ponder the image, Kaoru quickened her steps. If she made it there in time, she wouldn't have to wonder about what would happen. She felt downright giddy. Today is a great day…
******************************************************
Meanwhile, Saito leaned back in his booth, the ever-present smirk on his face as he contemplated his rival's new fashion sense. He could certainly use this little change to his advantage in the two's ongoing war. No actual battles were fought between the two now, though Saito sorely wished there could come an ending the nagging question of who would win. No, instead of swords, he and the Battousai were reduced to word play and mind games. Well, technically he was the only one that employed that particular tactic. The peaceful rurouni felt himself too honorable to win by such means.
Perhaps honorable wasn't the right word, though. Honesty certainly wasn't it, as the rurouni spit out little white lies daily to make his companions more comfortable with the realities of life. The fact that the pitiful fools believed only proved their inability to handle the harsh truths of existence. Integrity. That seemed a more fitting word for the rurouni's attitude. It was due to his integrity that the former Battousai would not consciously try to harm Saito in any way. And it was that very integrity that now kept Kenshin from being skewered by Saito's blade. Aku. Soku. Zan. The words he learned as a part of the Shinsengumi, and the words he continued to live by, disallowed him the right to kill the Battousai outright, for the man no longer fell within that range. Although Kenshin was still a strong swordsman, he no longer used his skills for the purposes of 'evil'. Therefore, Saito could do the man no harm without good reason and Kenshin was sure to refuse him the pleasure.
At least one good thing came of his visit to Tokyo. Seeing the other degraded and embarrassed by wearing that kimono was almost compensation enough…
******************************************************
Yesterday just hadn't been Michika's day.
She'd gotten lost in a forest for hours, leered at by an old man, somehow managed to walk right passed Tokyo, and still had yet to come upon that which she now sought. With the mountains at her back the night before, Michika had asked how things could possibly be worse. That was before she realized that she'd be traveling all night and would still be using the directions Sano had given her.
Michika stumbled along the road, cursing the fates and life in general. Then she did a one-eighty and asked the same cursed fate for luck in finding the Kamiya dojo. She'd been walking since the morning before and she was not happy. No food, no rest, and no cute guys to ogle. Surely this was a crime that would not go unpunished. On the bright side, she was in Tokyo now and very near the Kamiya dojo if Sano's directions were correct. Somehow, she doubted their reliability considering who had given them; nevertheless they were the only directions of any sort that she had.
A rather large black dog growled threateningly at her as she staggered passed an alleyway. She paused in her trek, intent upon silencing the mongrel. She removed her sandal and reached back, preparing to throw it at the offending mutt's head… but pulled up short. She blinked and a rather feral smile creased her features. She hid the shoe behind her back and crouched down, beckoning the stray to come closer in a voice so sweet, it'd make honey jealous. "Here, doggie, doggie, doggie… Come here, I won't hurt you." She started reaching towards the animal, but it whimpered and scampered off, leaving behind a disappointed Michika. "Aww…"
"A righteous heart would not need to eat passing animals, for goodness would see to it that it's disciple was fed."
Michika frowned. No, not him again… She slowly turned to inspect the speaker, though she was already sure of their identity. She was greeted with the sight of a tall man of athletic build with jade green eyes and dark brown hair that fell to his shoulders. Ugh, it is. She groaned and rolled her eyes. "And just when was the last time you ate, Chushin?"
He smirked, amusement twinkling brightly in his green orbs. "Two nights ago, dear Karada. But then I was born of a stronger gene pool than you."
Remembering the shoe she still had handy, she flung it with enough force to throw his head backwards. "We had the same parents, moron."
******************************************************
Kenshin sat the food down as carefully as he could, suppressing the ever-growing urge to simply dump it on Saito's head. Thus far, Saito had only made a single comment on Kenshin's state of dress… but Kenshin knew better. He knew Saito was thinking up all sorts of horrendous things that would only make his day that much worse. At this point, most would be inclined to say 'how could it possibly get worse?' Not only were the words not true, but saying them was also a jinx. There's was always a way things could get worse, and by saying that particular phrase, one only guaranteed their fate was sealed behind the very gates of hell. Besides, Kenshin could see the shadows of intrigue already dancing behind Saito's narrow eyes.
He gave the wolf his best glare, but expectedly to no avail. Kenshin's 'do and die' look only made Saito smirk in response as he reached for his chopsticks. "Is there anything else I can get you?" he asked through gritted teeth. He watched as Saito began picking through the shabu-shabu.
The man stopped, inspecting a piece. "Hmph, and here I was under the impression that you could cook." He eyed Kenshin with a look of near disgust on his face. "This beef must have come from a dyslexic cow, because it's the exact opposite of what I ordered."
Kenshin blinked, somehow confused by the fact that such a comment had come from Saito. He was immediately snapped out of it though when nearly the entire restaurant started 'mooing'… backwards. "Ooooooooom…" Kenshin found that he was suddenly very uncomfortable and it had absolutely nothing to with the drafty kimono. Just as quickly as the crowd had started though, they quieted, so much so that Kenshin could clearly hear sounds of the market crowd outside. Saito's eyes shifted to look just passed Kenshin at someone who'd walked up. The redhead slowly turned to find Yahiko standing just behind him, staring at him. The boy's gaze slowly traveled up until they settled upon the older man's face and he smirked.
"You're so pretty, Kenshin."
Yanking the apron off and shoving it into Yahiko's arms, Kenshin turned his back on both the boy and Saito. "You can deal with him," he informed Yahiko in a slightly quivering tone and sniffed the air. "I have laundry to do." The rurouni then exited the Akabeko as calmly and gracefully as he could, ignoring Saito's 'ahou' insult and the chuckling customers as he passed. He had lasted this long, he would not make a fool of himself now. Besides… bursting into tears and running home to change would only make him seem even girlier.
---------------------------------------------
Japanese TermsSouken no Shibun: The Four Parts of Creation
Busu: ugly
Baka: stupid/idiot
Sakabatou: reversed blade sword
Tori no Mizutaki: chicken stew
Shihondai: assistant master
Ahou: Moron
A/N: Ugh, too tired for randomness…
Ugh, well after a grueling fight with the compy, my vocabulary, and the desk, I've managed to finish yet another chapter. I can't remember if Author Lady pre-read these chapters, but I'm going to thank her anyways! Thank you!